Having been ordered to complete several hours of community service in penance for the commission of certain detestable acts against certain adorable species, I've decided to help my fellow games journalists by putting together a... template, shall we say, for Duke Nukem Forever reviews. If you are a games journalist in need of a quick turnaround on your Duke assignment, feel free to use this valuable asset at no cost to yourself. My encyclopedic knowledge of games writing cliche -- combined with an equally impressive recollection of Duke Nukem quotations -- ought to leave you with a review capable of generating literally tens of clicks. Simply fill out this convenient sheet, hand it to the nearest person you suspect to be an editor, and collect your check!

For your convenience, I've offered both positive and negative selections in some portions of the template. Please circle the one you find most fits your opinion.


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