Sugar Skull Bits and Halloween Fits

There are costumes, and then there are costumes.  When it comes to Halloween, the husband has always been more of a DIY than a costume-in-a-bag kind of guy.  So over the years for my parents' Halloween party, he's devised the following disguises:

- Guy Fieri & The Pioneer Woman (not implying they're a couple!)

- Bob Ross & his Happy Little Tree

- Johnny Atkins & Carla from The Goldbergs

- The Brawny Man & the Sparkles Fairy

- Mr. Clean & a '50s Housewife

  

But this year, the husband didn't have time to come up with something homegrown, so we went on Amazon and found these Day of the Dead getups.  Although we've never gone for something scary, I admit that these edgy and -- this part is very important -- not at all gory, dark side ensembles helped me get into the Halloween spirit.  On a lighter note, I loved the rainbow bows bisecting my ribcage.  

Hair comb and choker: Ella & Elly, Zulily

That said, here are my Halloween-themed "regular" outfits.  Or, in other words, my everyday costumes:

Bag: Betsey Johnson, Macy's

Belt: Marshalls

Silver Spider Necklace

Top: Wet Seal

Alien Admirer Barrette Brooch

Shoes: Betseyville, Macy's

Jelly bracelets: Target; Spike and orange bracelets: Amrita Singh, Zulily; Yellow bangles: B Fabulous; Black and white bracelet: Mixit, JCPenney; Ring: PinkBopp, Etsy; Skirt: Wild Fable, Target; Bag: Cat & Jack, Target

 

Tights: Isadora, Zulily

Skirt: Wild Fable, Target

Shoes: Sam Edelman, Kohl's

Fabulous Felt Halloween Candy Barrette

Jumbo Jack-O-Lantern Necklace (sold just before Halloween!)

Orange bangle: Mixit, JCPenney; Lime bangle and orange bangles: B Fabulous; Purple bracelet: Etsy

Top: Just Poly, Macy's

Lime top: SHEIN

And that's it!  Whatever your plans or apparel, make the most of this year's witching hour.  Have a very safe and happy Halloween! 🎃

All in the Family: A Heart Day at Home

Even a quarantine queen like me breaks out for a Valentine's party.  Every year, my immediate family celebrates with festive food, decorations, and gifts for the kids.  This is the first year since the pandemic that we're doing it again, and I must say I'm excited.  

If you're a fan of The Goldbergs, then you may be thinking, hey, wait a minute, isn't that a little like the Schwartzes?  If you don't know what I'm talking about, then here's the skinny.  On this season's V-day episode, siblings Erica and Barry were horrified to find out that their significant others, Geoff and Joanne (who are also, in this sitcomiest of sitcoms, siblings) celebrate Valentine's Day with each other and their parents.  The notoriously non-mushy Goldberg kids couldn't believe that the Schwartzes liked each other enough to willingly spend a nonfamily holiday together.  I could relate -- with Geoff and Joanne, that is.  (Except for the part where they peck each other on the lips.  Sorry not sorry, Schwartzes, but that's just icky.)  Because it's nice to get together with your nearest and dearest and laugh, even if -- especially if -- the rest of the world is laughing at you.

Not that Erica and Barry stayed snarky for long.  In the space of thirty minutes (or more like twenty, with commercials), they reversed their initial affection rejection and learned to appreciate each other.  Was it weird that this epiphany dawned during a romantic horse-drawn carriage ride?  For sure.  Then again, anyone willing to endure the smell of an equine's backside is in it for the long haul.  Brother/sister, boyfriend/girlfriend, oldster/paid companion, whatevs.  

So, this Valentine's Day, I hope you get to hang with someone you love -- or, even better yet, someone you like.                         

And that you laugh so hard it hurts and burns the calories from all of that chocolate. 

Sweatshirt Alert: JCP on TV

Last Wednesday, I was watching American Housewife when Taylor (Meg Donnelly) entered the Otto kitchen wearing a retro gray, purple, and turquoise color block Arizona Jeans sweatshirt from JCPenney.  "Hey, that's my shirt!" I exclaimed.  The husband looked up from his phone dubiously.  "If you don't believe me, I'll show you!" I sputtered with all the righteous indignation of a third-grader in the '90s whose Yo! MTV Raps trading card collection is being called into question.  ("You don't have LL Cool J and Dr. Dre!"  "Do too!")  Then I raced upstairs to grab the sweatshirt.  When I returned, the husband nodded, then restarted the show, paused it, and took this pic without me even having to ask.  I've said it before, and I'll say it again.  The husband is a prince among men.

This isn't the first time I've seen one of my garments on the small screen.  The Middle's Sue Heck had a pair of my Target pajamas, and The Goldbergs' Erica wore my L'Amour by Nannette Lepore crop top, also from JCPenney.  I guess ABC likes JCP, that mecca for middle class shoppers, even when it's on life support.  Later during the Housewife episode, Greg (Diedrich Bader) took the thread a step further when chiding wife Katie (Katy Mixon) about one of her stunts:

"I had to take all those tops back to JCPenney and explain why there were no tags and why they smelled like deodorant."

It wasn't so long ago that Mixon was doing JCP commercials with Splitting Up Together's Jenna Fischer, then after that show got cancelled, Single Parents' Leighton Meester.  Then Parents was canned too.  Will Housewife, which has bounced around timeslots for years and was, this season, forced to recast spooky and snarky youngest child Anna-Kat (easily my favorite Otto), fare better than these sacked sitcoms and their preferred yet doomed department store?

Only time and ratings will tell.  In the meantime, I'm going to wear this sweatshirt like it's 1990-something.  And reminisce about my troll collection.

Because I never owned a single Yo! MTV Raps card.  That was the neighborhood kids and my sister.

The Color Khaki: Game Show Bow

Bag: Dolls Kill; Shoes: Chase & Chloe, Zulily; Yellow shell bangle: Later Operator, Etsy; Pink bracelet: Amrita Singh, Zulily; Yellow bangles: B Fabulous; Blue bangle: Kohl's; Belt: Belt is Cool, Amazon

Dress: POPSUGAR, Kohl's

Last Wednesday, while waiting for The Goldbergs to come on, I caught the tail end of Wheel of Fortune.  The final puzzle was "What are you wearing?" and the answer was, of all things, "Beige slacks."  Which was weird for a show named after a wheel so colorful they make clocks in its image:  

Clock: Fred Flare

You'd think that Vanna would stricken words signifying the shade of stale biscuits from her glittering, green goddess stage.  Because colors are important -- not just in outfits, but in identities and stories.  Sure, whenever someone utters, "Oh, he's a colorful character," you may think of a Hawaiian shirt-wearing weenie who belts out "Escape (The Pina Colada Song)" every happy hour at a bar where they don't have karaoke.  Yet I guarantee that you want to hear about that guy more than khaki-clad Uncle Stu, whose biggest claim to fame is the homemade Miracle-Gro he feeds his prized begonias.  

But enough about Wheel of Fortune (for now).  When it comes to the color wheel, blue, yellow, and red are the primary colors, or, as we currently say, essential workers.  And this Fabulous Felt Bow Barrette Brooch has color all tied up.  Okay, so it's blue, yellow, and pink instead of blue, yellow, and red.  But everyone knows that pink is just red in mood lighting.  

Fabulous Felt Bow Barrette Brooch

Speaking of bows, I remember one Wheel contestant, years ago, who wore a big black bow in her hair.  It set off her yellow top perfectly and had such a fresh, vintage feel.  Then there was another player, also a woman, who wore a sparkly tuxedo top complete with bowtie.  And although I didn't know them, just knowing that they were out there, strutting their sartorial stuff on national TV when most people wore something safe, made me happy.

By the way, last Wednesday's player solved that putty-hued puzzle and went home with a boatload of cash.  So sometimes beige slacks are a win.

I hope she uses the loot to buy the pot of gold attached to her personal rainbow.

Sleuth Spoof: Deserts and Daheim: A Case of Killing It

' "What could be more fun than discussing the brutal murder of a friend?" '

So trilled Beverly (Wendi McLendon-Covey) during this week's episode of The Goldbergs.  Adam (Sean Giambrone) had just dragged her to see Clue, and she loved it so much (not, she's quick to point out, the mystery, but the fancy food and clothes), that she wastes no time in planning her own murder mystery party.  The result, of course, is as hilarious as any of the beloved Jenkintown family's hijinks.  But Bevy's not the only one to get caught up in the excitement of a good thriller (whatever her motivations).  

As you know, I'm into whodunits.  These days, I'm reading my way through Mary Daheim's Emma Lord mysteries.  (Daheim, as I've mentioned, also writes the zany bed-and-breakfast books featuring sleuthing cousins Judith and Renie.)  Emma traded city life at The Oregonian for The Advocate in backwoods Washington.  As such, she's an outsider in a small, as she calls it, mountain "aerie," even once she's lived there for years.  People trust her, but she's not one of them.  Despite dabbling in romance with sheriff Milo Dodge, she remains haunted by the one that got away.  Essentially, she's alone, pitting her against her most formidable adversary -- herself.   Although the Emma Lord series is still categorized as "cozy" -- it's seldom gory, it's set in a small town, and the heroine is a small business owner -- it's darker than its bed-and-breakfast counterpart.  But it's every bit as funny.  And although the crimes are compelling, they're not what really draw me.  That honor goes to Daheim's irreverence and offbeat wit, both of which are machete-sharp.  Her descriptions of the local yokels -- foibles, family trees, and all -- create characters that are layered and familiar.  They keep me coming back to this crime-ravaged corner of the Pacific Northwest -- even if I never want to meet these weirdos in person.

Anyway, getting my hands on every Emma Lord title means sometimes buying used (these started coming out in the '90s), which I'm not normally into.  But now when these gently thumbed missives arrive in the mail, I look at them with fresh eyes.  I wonder if the person who read them before me also questioned how one small logging town could be hit with so many homicides.  Or how Francine's Fine Apparel could survive in a place with such high unemployment.

Here I am reading one of them!  Truth be told, this is a staged shot (but then, aren't they all?).  Because this (Colonel Mustard, ha ha) chair, lovely though it is, isn't the most comfortable for reading.  Same goes for the jeggings and jewelry.  But I decided not to show you how I really read, all sprawled out on the couch with unspackled skin and wayward hair.  That wouldn't be fair to you.  Or me. :)    

As for the necklace, it's one I restrung recently.  When I first made it, I used yellow silicone beads, which I'd bought without knowing what they were made of.  They were sticky and, after a few wears, attracted as much dust as a lollipop in a lint trap.  So I made a mental note -- silicone: bad for breasts, bad for beads -- and started again with hard plastic.  I'm happy with the way the "new" necklace turned out.  I especially love how it blends in with my leopard sweatshirt like a camo cactus (the charms are western, even if there isn't a saguaro in sight).

Wild West Wynona Necklace

Sweatshirt: Zulily

So it's no -- surely, you knew this was coming -- mystery why I heart crafts or crafty pseudo-detectives.  Creating something from nothing (or an old something) is a thrill, and sitting back while someone else solves an (entirely different kind of) problem is the ultimate lazy river of vicarious living.  Whether the murder takes place on the side of the road or in a gilded conservatory, it coaxes me out of my humdrum existence -- and then, once the body bag hits, makes me grateful for it all over again!  In the case of Clue, the genre injects a dose of Agatha Christie-level gravitas and glamour.  After all, what little -- or grown-up -- girl doesn't want to be Miss Scarlet?  

Bananas or not, Bev was on to something.

Oodles of Noodles and, Yes, a Caboodle

One of the good things about this quarantine is getting lots of time to read.  And as you know, there are few things I find more comforting than a good old-fashioned murder mystery.  The cozier the better.  And when it comes to gimmicks?  Bring 'em on!  That's why I was so happy to stumble upon Vivien Chien's noodle shop series when browsing books on Target.com.  In them, Cleveland-based heroine Lana Lee is fueled by a main course of managing her family's Chinese restaurant with a tasty side order of sleuthing.  The other characters almost always call her by her full name, which makes her sound like a superhero and/or Dave Kim from The Goldbergs.  Before you ask, yes, she's dating a detective, and, yes, she's smarter than he is.  Oh, and also, her family drives her nuts.  But whether she's dyeing her hair a new crazy color or scarfing down her beloved doughnuts, Lana doesn't let them -- or Detective Trudeau -- get her down.  I don't even like Chinese food, but I've gobbled up three of these books so far, and they've been chockful of chow fun.  Here are some of my favorite parts, most of which don't involve murder:

Death by Dumpling

"Jasmine's great.  She gets me.  And she gets my hair.  Hair's important to me.  It's a statement.  Hair and shoes.  If you have those two things going on, you're pretty much solid." (68)

"As I stepped inside, I stopped and took a deep breath, closing my eyes and taking in the intoxicating smell that is the Modern Scroll.  This was my favorite store of all.  It was a small slice of heaven, and I came in any chance I got just to be around the books.  Books were my solace, my escape." (97)

Egg Drop Dead

"Saturday evening should be spent either doing something incredibly fun, or doing something very relaxing.  It should not be spent talking about murder suspects with your significant other while you binge-eat cheesy popcorn and doughnut holes." (199)

Murder Lo Mein

"The bathroom was immaculate and might have been nicer than my apartment.  At times, I wished there was such a job as restroom connoisseur.  I would have a blast rating all the bathrooms in the city . . . and there were quite a few that would make it on the . . . well, you know what list I'm talking about." (192)

"He was the professional, and I was just a gal with an overactive imagination and a ratty notebook." (238)

Most of these are about the kind of human interest minutiae and humor that I find so delightful.  Except for the last one.  That's about Lana Lee questioning her whodunit prowess thanks to Trudeau, who, under the circumstances, I feel compelled to call a private dick.  Thankfully, Lana rises above this nonsense, proving herself to be more than, as Gwen Stefani put it, "just a girl."

But enough heaviness.  Chien's books, along with Jewel Divas Style and Pinterest, made me want to take this picture of elbow macaroni in a Caboodle:  

Elbows may not be lo mein, but they're what I had on hand (see above about me not eating Chinese food), and I figured that one weirdly staged carb is as amusing as another.  Just think of the pompoms as meatballs.  Also, that's my elbow in the mirror, so happy pic pun accident.  Anyway, Jewel Divas is a blogger who loves -- and writes -- about Caboodles more than anyone ever.  And Pinterest has provided me with many a Caboodle pic to add to my Righteously Retro '80s and '90s Childhood board.  Pinterest is also where I learned about Violet Tinder Studios, which photographs everyday objects in unexpected and glamorous ways.  My pic in no way reflects the sophistication of that outfit's output.  But Violet's spirit still shines through my effort, and so I must give credit where credit is due. 

So, that's lo mein (sort of) and Lana Lee.  She's a Nancy Drew disciple (she said it, not me) who rocks takeout and taking out bad guys. 

And who sure knows how to use her noodle.

Spin-off Kilt-er Filter: 90s Knits and Hits

Kitschy Compass Rainbow Rampage Necklace

Top: Wild Fable, Target

Skirt: Dickie's, Dolls Kill

Boots: Apt. 9, Kohl's

Socks: Gifted

Bag: Olivia Miller, JCPenney

Belt: Wild Fable, Target

 Menagerie Madness Rainbow Rampage Necklace

Blouse: Bongo, Sears

Skirt: Vanilla Star, Macy's

Shoes: Betsey Johnson, DSW

Bag: Sleepyville Critters, Zulily

 Black and Cream Dream Necklace

Sweater: Hearts & Roses London, Zulily

Skirt: Arizona Jeans, JCPenney

Shoes: Penny Loves Kenny, Zulily

Bag: Tee Shirt & Jeans, Kohl's

Red bangle: B Fabulous

Cream bangle: Mixit, JCPenney

Unicorn Garden Rainbow Rampage Necklace 

Top: TJ Maxx

Skirt: Arizona Jeans, JCPenney

Boots: Simply Vera, Kohl's

Bag: Betsey Johnson, Modcloth

Belt: Candie's, Kohl's

When I first saw the commercials for The Goldbergs spin-off Schooled, I was like, "What?!  How are they going to have a '90s-something sitcom about Barry's girlfriend Lainey when the '80s-something Goldbergs is still on the air?!"  But then I saw The Goldbergs episode where Barry (who's a high school senior) and Lainey (who's a college dropout) struggle to end their engagement, and all became clear.  Although they're still in love, they don't want to get married.  Because they live in the 1980s, not the 1890s!  Anyway, Lainey makes the decision easy -- or as easy as it can be -- by leaving Jenkintown for LA to chase her dream of becoming a rock star with no more than a goodbye (VHS, of course) video.  So, she's out of the '80s and out of Beverly's kitchen, freeing her to become the new chorus teacher at her old high school a decade or so later.  Yet despite this tidy send-off/set-up, I remained suspicious.  Would Schooled work or merely be a flash in the pan?  Still, either way, I knew I would watch it.  Because if there's a sitcom on TV, then I tune in.  Even if it's one of the bad ones.  

Luckily, Schooled turned out to be one of the good ones.  I don't know if it was Lainey's classic underdog-meets-feisty-fish-out-of-water character, the abundance of chokers and plaid miniskirts, the sweet swell of '90s pop rock classics, or even the appearance of Brett Dier (Jane the Virgin's Michael) as curly coiffed English teacher extraordinaire and Lainey's nascent love interest.  But I was sunk by the end of the pilot.  The haunting yet hopeful strains of The Smashing Pumpkins's "Today" playing as Lainey's students mosh for their school concert instead of crooning a barbershop quartet might have cinched it.  Because although I talk a lot about my love for '80s trends and pop culture, at heart, I'm a '90s chick (or, as Icona Pop originally intended, a '90s bitch.  Why the FCC dubbed that out but let Meredith Brooks belt out her '90s anthem "Bitch" over the airwaves remains a mystery to me.  Perhaps the '90s were a kinder, gentler -- and yet somehow more badass -- time.).  People identify most with the decade when they came of age, and I'm no different.  To this day, when I hear Weezer or the Cranberries or Better than Ezra or any other angsty group of that era, I feel this kind of euphoric melancholy (if there is such a thing), like nothing and everything is possible all at once.  Although I like all kinds of music, it's this stuff that seems the best and most real to me, like it's delivering a personal message.  You know.  Like the super-intense, self-absorbed way you feel about everything when you're a teenager.  

On a less introspective note, in the '90s I was also into plaid minis.  I had dozens and now wish that I hadn't given them all to Goodwill.  Fortunately, like rainbows, chenille, faux fur, checkerboard prints, and ring zippers, they're having a moment again.  So I restocked my closet.  This week I put together not one, not two, not three, but four outfits in which Scotch skirts rule.  Here they are by themselves, photographed Warhol-style:

That said, Schooled has fashion, nostalgia, and nostalgic fashion all locked up.  But more importantly, like The Goldbergs, it's also a (putting on my adult voice now) quality program.  Part of the genius of The Goldbergs is that grown-up Adam's voice-over never tells you exactly which year it is, just that it's such and such a date in 1980-something.  This frees the show to reference movies, songs, and fashions of the time in keeping with the storyline instead of the date without prompting nitpicky viewers to protest exactly when said stuff hit the market.  Not that some viewers don't do that anyway (I've seen that Fan Corrections segment on Conan; I know that there are basement-dwelling Internet trolls as far as a Nielsen box can reach).  The point is, The Goldbergs isn't about being a factually perfect chronicle of what happened during an iconic decade.  It's not The Eighties on CNN, or even I Love the 80s on VH1.  It's about creating a tribute to all the things everyone loves about this decade, all the little slice-of-life snippets that make it what it is in our memories.  Also, the show is equal parts big laughs and heart, which is a sure-fire formula for any sitcom.  No one wants to love a family who isn't funny, just as no one wants to laugh if they don't care about the family in the first place.  And Schooled is following in The Goldbergs's neon pump footsteps.  In addition to offering up relatable and hilarious characters, witty dialogue, and colorful costumes and sets, it continues its predecessor's pop culture pulse tradition.  The first two episodes are chockful of '90s references including but not limited to Kurt Cobain, Zima, She's All That, Discman, and Mrs. Doubtfire.  Also, the first episode opens with Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch's "Good Vibrations."  If that doesn't set the tone for a bitchin' school year and TV series, than I don't know what does.  So, gold star, Adam F. Goldberg.

Can't wait to see what you teach us next.

Something from the Star: Bright Light, Lite Brite

Neon Orange and Chartreuse Barrettes

Neon Purple, Blue, and Pink Barrettes

Banana Bow Barrette

 Neon Pink, Chartreuse, and Orange Barrettes

Inner Circle Barrette

Neon Purple and Pink Barrettes 

 Yellow Bow Barrettes

Top: Candie's, Kohl's

Skirt (a dress!): Modcloth

Shoes: Circus by Sam Edelman, Kohl's

Bag: Princess Vera, Kohl's

Belt: Gifted

What do G. Love & Special Sauce, Gremlins, and that Christmas light-like toy have in common?  They're all about lights and getting lit.  Although not necessarily in that order.  

Because Friday was the solstice, I thought it was a good time for a party look made for -- what else? -- northern lights and winter nights.  Enter this fluorescent frock, sparkly black top, and starry clutch  (holographic parka to ward off frostbite excluded.)  The top reminds me of an inky black sky, making for a spangled, albeit slightly smoggy backdrop for the brooch-styled barrettes.  I've worn it only once, to the movies.  This outfit, however, is ideal for clubbing in Juneau or Helsinki while downing mulled ciders and hot buttered rums.  Or, in my case, hot chocolates and herbal teas (see aforementioned sentence about me wearing this top to see Daddy's Home 2).  Because December is no time to guzzle the cold beverages so immortalized by the Sauce. 

So, about these barrettes.  I can't stop staring at them!  What can I say, their vivid colors and graphic shapes speak to me.  To make them, I decided not to fool with the craft store fare of openwork metal French and alligator clips and instead headed straight to the source, a.k.a. the grocery store grooming aisle, for Scunci and Goody.  These high-quality barrettes are comprised of French clips covered with durable plastic bars that make sturdy perches for cabochons.  The finished products make me think of candy, all colorful and shiny.  And yes, tasty.  Is it bad form to call one's own stuff tasty?  Not according to wannabe rap icon Big Tasty.  Then again, it's probably bad form to view the misguided middle kid from The Goldbergs as any kind of role model.  

One thing's for sure; these barrettes are a step up from the first barrette I ever made, which featured a weird, disembodied harlequin head.  I was about ten and big into harlequins, which were everywhere in the '90s.  Don't ask.  Anyway, the barrette was a big, gold-rimmed white plastic rectangle to which I affixed a ceramic sparkly green and purple turbanned head.  It was pretty heavy (figuratively and literally, clown motifs always being disturbing), and I don't think I ever wore it.  Kind of like how I rarely played with my Lite Brite set.  That was more of my sister's thing (literally; it was her toy.)  Maybe that was because of the if-not-menacing-than-unquestionably-unsettling clown head on the box.  The head that was most certainly that of a workaday circus performer and not a high-brow harlequin.  

It always comes back to clowns.  Maybe they're the ones we shouldn't feed after midnight.  

Thank You for Being on Trend: Golden Oldies Then and Now

Go for the Golden Girl Necklace

Top (a dress!): Modcloth

Skirt: Celebrity Pink, Macy's

Shoes: B.A.I.T., Zulily

Bag: Marshalls

Belt: Belt is Cool, Amazon

Sunglasses: Mudd, Kohl's

Picture it.  Jenkintown, 1980-something.  A classic beloved '80s sitcom is featured on a current beloved sitcom that's set in the '80s.  That's right.  "The Goldbergs" yukked it up for "The Golden Girls" in a recent episode.  Now, this is the part where I ask myself, self, should I take a beat here to explain "The Golden Girls" and "The Goldbergs"?  Probably not.  I mean, it's not like you live under a rock or something.  But just in case there are any rock dwellers out there who just happen to have internet access, here it goes:  The Golden Girls are/were eccentric ladies living together in Miami, and the Goldbergs are an eccentric family living in a suburb of Philadelphia.  

Now that that's out of the way, we can get back to our regularly scheduled programming.  

In this episode, the Goldberg clan becomes smitten with the four feisty Floridians, humming along with the theme song (yes, even crotchety Murray [Jeff Garlin]!) and picking out their favorites.  Beverly (Wendi McLendon-Covey) is particularly taken with the idea of having gal pals to laugh with once her schmoopies are grown and gone.  So, as part of her Bevolution, which is her self-improvement plan (and yes, that's what she really calls it), she launches a mission to forge lifelong friendships stat, an ill-starred effort that involves strong-arming her fellow PTAers into bedazzling sweaters and answering to belittling nicknames.  Confrontations are made, heart-to-hearts are had, and hilarity ensues, all to the tune of a cover of the Golden Girls theme song.  Also, there's sledding on lunch trays (a failed ski trip somehow factors in).  Betty White does not make a cameo.  The only thing that could have made it more iconic would be Shaq doing commercials for Gold Bond (because of the gold, not the Shaq, as he's clearly '90s territory).  Well, that and a Betty White cameo.

So.  To celebrate this turduckan of cultural Culture Club-era camp, I made this gold Go for the Golden Girl Necklace.  Or rather, as I say in its Etsy listing, "gold-tone."  (This is The Tote Trove, not Tiffany's.)  

Ah, gold.  The Big G.  What a winner.  It's the color of Beverly's big, bouffant hair, and the shade of the Miami sun.  Also of liquid gold Velveeta shells and cheese, which is something that domestic divas Beverly Goldberg and Sophia Petrillo (Estelle Getty) would never dream of serving to family.  Those two would get along, I think, what with their big mouths and manipulatively matriachal ways.  Or maybe they'd destroy each other, just like the dinosaurs.  (What?  The dinosaurs didn't destroy each other?  T-Rex ghost, you've been lying to me.)  But there's no need for a face-off.  Because . . . (sing it with me, now!), you make new (TV) friends but keep the old; one is silver and the other's gold(en).  Unlike the dinosaurs, "The Golden Girls" and "The Goldbergs" will never die, living on forever in syndication.

Sounds like a reason to gorge on shrimp parm and cheesecake to me.

Springing Back into Summer and Falling for Fall TV

 Great White Necklace

Tunic: Miken, Marshalls

Tee: So, Kohl's

Skirt: Olsenboye, JCPenney

Shoes: Betseyville, Macy's

Bag: Uniquely Different, Etsy

Belt: JCPenney

Scarf: Wet Seal

Sunglasses: JCPenney

 Mister Mustache Necklace

Tunic: Miken, Marshalls

Bra top: Boscov's

Skirt: L'Amour by Nanette Lepore for JCPenney

Shoes: Worthington, JCPenney

Bag: Nordstrom

Belt: Wet Seal

Sunglasses: JCPenney

 Fruits and Flowers Necklace

Tunic: Miken, Marshalls

Tee: So, Kohl's

Skirt (a dress!): Monteau, Marshalls

Shoes: Ami Clubwear

Bag: Nine West, Boscov's

Belt: Wet Seal

Sunglasses: Rampage, Boscov's

The first summery thing about this post is the two scenic pictures.  They're both of the north end of Brigantine, and I took them during a recent bicycle ride with the husband.  As you know, I normally refrain from outdoorsy activities.  But I was glad that I came along this time, as I'd never been to this part of the island in the six plus years I've lived here.  It's beautiful, kind of wild and hidden and marshy.  I can see why people like it, despite it bearing the brunt of most hurricanes' wrath.

The second summery thing about this post is the hot pink lace cover-up.  I know; I too was surprised to find that that's what it was when I found it at Marshalls some three years ago.  Somehow, it seems too fancy to toss over a bikini.  That's probably one of the reasons why I've never worn it.  But I wanted to change that, or at least do the next best thing by having Tammy (the Torso, that is, for those of you scratching your heads) wear it.  So I challenged myself to use it in three outfits.  The middle one is my favorite, even if it does kind of scream fashion don't at the VMAs.  

And now on to the good part, which is to say, the TV.  I don't know about you, but once Labor Day hits, I'm as excited about fall premier week as a cat in a yarn store.  There's nothing to beat fall's sneaky chill like the cozy glow that is the TV screen.  I like to think of it as the modern-day fireplace.  Or maybe I should say campfire, as that's the one with the stories.  Anyway, there's a lot of programming to choose from, so I'll just give (admittedly specious) shout-outs to the lineups I follow.  I'm something of a line-up lemming, tolerating shows that I'd otherwise skip simply because they're surrounded by some of my favorites.  Still, at the end of the day (or should I say week?) I end up enjoying them all on some level, taking the same even-when-it's-bad-it's-good approach to sitcoms that people take to pizza.  Hey, whether it's entertainment or eats, the more cheese the better.    

That having been said, Fox came out of the gate running the second week in September with the ever edgy "New Girl" and "The Mindy Project."  Family-friendly ABC reclaimed its Wednesday night reign, regaling us with old favorites like "The Middle" and "Modern Family," now bookending sophomore sitcom "The Goldbergs" and wrapping up with the brand-new "Blackish," all contriving to create a downy cushion for the last-act drama of "Nashville"(which is not a sitcom, but pretty soft as dramas go, making it a-okay in my [song] book.)  Then the following Tuesday ABC introduced "Selfie" and "Manhattan Love Story," serving up stories for singles.  In the CBS camp, "The Big Bang Theory" found its way once again back to Mondays, at least until late October when it joins two of Chuck Lorre's other offspring, "Two and a Half Men" and "Mom" ("Mike and Molly" will return mid-season).  But it's NBC that remains the most barren, with the final season of "Parks and Recreation" yet to debut while newbies "Bad Judge" and "A to Z" play out as sweetly acerbic appetizers.      

Whew, that was more than a mouthful.  Which means that there's just enough room to cram in some eating (cheddar choked or whole grain healthy?  I'll never tell) before tonight's two-hour sitcom block begins.