Showing posts with label Walmart. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Walmart. Show all posts

Thursday, February 9, 2023

Beyond Brisket: Hair Flair from the Heartland


It's no secret that I love a celebrity fashion brand.  Lauren Conrad, Jessica Simpson, and Katy Perry claim a considerable portion of my wardrobe, and once upon a time, I even had a pair of Paris Hilton shoes.  (Harry Styles, if you want to bust out a line of sequin jumpsuits, then I'm here for it.)  And now I can add Ree Drummond to that illustrious list!  That's right, the Pioneer Woman is cooking up more than casseroles, expanding her Walmart offerings from kitchen accoutrements to apparel.  So I was delighted when my mom gifted me with these lovely Pioneer Woman scrunchies and headband, both of which I adore.  Each one is, as Ree says herself, "as useful as it is gorgeous!" 

Way to pretty up pioneering, Ree.  Willa Cather would approve.

Saturday, October 31, 2020

Halloween Scene Scream

This year, Halloween looks a little bit different.  For one thing, there's no big bowl of candy (sorry, kiddies), just a few token treats for the husband and me.  They're Reese's cups in the shape of, yes, bats.  Which is as fitting as it gets, I guess, when it comes to pandemic eats. 


Another thing that's different is that the husband and I are showing off our costumes on House Party instead of at my parents' Halloween party.  This morning, I scarfed down an extra large dry (thanks to that no-show Walmart grocery delivery order) bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch to empty box number 2.  (It was a tough job, but someone had to do it.)  It was the husband who had the idea to turn the boxes into masks.  He's been harboring empty box number 1 in the pantry for weeks.


Something that hasn't changed this year is our favorite festive amphibian.  Corona can't stop Kermit.  Even if he is stuck in a spider web instead of wedged in a wine glass.  The husband and I think that it's important to mix things up.  When crisis strikes, it's the children who suffer.  


And that, as the mummy said, is a wrap!  Compared to greeting trick-or-treaters and crashing a monster mash bash, it's a subpar way to celebrate spooky.  But all in all not so bad when the creepiest thing going's a cough.  So, sit back, eat more than your fair share of candy, and enjoy the silver lining of not having woken up to a tp'd yard this year.

Happy Halloween!  

Tuesday, May 12, 2020

Toilet Paper Caper





These days, caper doesn't mean what it used to.  Just as excitement over toilet paper no longer means "decorating" your neighbor's house.  Now it's all about snagging some Charmin before your next bathroom incident.  And everyone's in on the search and the success stories.  On a recent episode of "Jimmy Kimmel Live!," Kimmel's three-year-old son burst through a fortress of heard-won rolls.  On Jim Gaffigan's YouTube channel, Gaffigan's head pops up from a sea of two-ply.  Finally, my Pinterest feed is, ahem, clogged with products boasting "I survived the toilet paper crisis of 2020!".  Well, I'm not Jimmy Kimmel or Jim Gaffigan.  But I am a person.  And I'm thrilled to share my own tp coup (while, for some reason, dressed like backwoods Barbie).  This is how it unraveled. 

I was trolling Walmart.com for essentials (i.e. another half dozen boxes of Nature Valley almond butter bars), when I pessimistically typed "toilet paper" into the search box.  I was expecting to see the usual toilet paper roll stands (such a tease!).  So, when Northern appeared on my screen, I couldn't believe it.  Northern, a brand I never even buy, suddenly seemed like the most beautiful word in the world.  It made me think of idyllic Scandinavian fishing villages, the northern lights, and, of course, not having to delve into my party paper napkin supply for intimate use.  I wasted no time adding two 12-packs to my cart; I'd been foiled before by waiting even a minute too long on the likes of Target.com.  Yet even after I completed the order, I had my doubts.  In this age of mass shortages, it was entirely possible that I'd get one of those sorry-not-sorry emails informing me that my Northern order had, well, gone south.  I'd been there before, you see (I'm talking to you Target), and like a jilted lover, I'd hardened my heart.  But no such email arrived and then, just two days after the estimated delivery date, the Northern landed on my doorstep with all the unlikely magic of a unicorn. 

More than anything, this hysteria over toilet paper shows that the COVID-19 pandemic has been something of an equalizer.  When even celebrities are clamoring to maintain personal hygiene normalcy, it makes you realize that we really are all in this together.  And that we all put our pants on one leg at a time.

And now, thanks to Northern (and Walmart!), my legs can be blessedly clean.

Wednesday, April 29, 2020

Face Case: Jim Carrey Brings the Scary


I've worn a lot of weird things in my time, but I never thought that a mask would be one of them.  Yet here I am all suited up to pick up my groceries at Walmart.  My sister, who is an amazing seamstress, made masks for everyone in our family and for all of her friends.  She said that she added the red lace to mine to make it special.  Well, mission accomplished! 



It (the mask, not the lace) makes me feel a little like I'm about to perform open heart surgery or rob a bank.  Which makes a strange sort of sense as in these times we're all superheroes or villains.

I used the mask as the first building block for my outfit.  Because an outing's still an outing even if you never leave the car.  I especially like how the red lace tie looks like part of my top.  Let's hear it for happy accidents!  And, of course, for a fresh haul of foodstuffs.

If only my mask had not only special lace, but special powers like Jim Carrey's. 

I think his mucus-colored mug from that movie could be just the thing to scare Covie straight.

Sunday, April 19, 2020

Love You, Lip Hue, Yes I Do


Blouse: Bisou Bisou, JCPenney
Tank: Bisou Bisou, JCPenney
Purse: Fred Flare
Ring: Gifted
Hair ties: Marshalls 

Lip prints have always been popular.  I guess it's because they're cheeky and feminine and scream teen queen romance.  See Exhibit A, my beloved (reversible!) lips sweater that has sadly since bit the dust:


Good thing I have this new white and pink lip-print blouse to console me.  It's been biding its time in my closet, just waiting to be worn and/or posted.  And today is the day!  I made these accessories to go with it.  True, they're not lip-themed.  But they're still hella loud.


Yellow Bow Glow Barrettes

Orange Twist Butterfly Earrings

Over the Rain-blow Necklace

Top: Candie's, Kohl's
Skirt: Mossimo, Target
Shoes: Rocket Dog, Marshalls
Bag: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's
Belt: Belt is Cool, Amazon
Sunglasses: Amazon  

Despite my love for all things lippy, while quarantined, I've been forsaking my actual lipstick.  Yes, I've swapped my signature Revlon Cherries in the Snow for -- gasp -- pumpkin pie-flavored Chapstick. Talk about long-lasting leftovers; it's the Thanksgiving dessert that keeps on giving.  Wearing it makes me think of that old ad with Olympic skier Picabo Street proudly proclaiming that she's not a lipstick girl, she's a Chapstick girl.  As you know, I hate the Olympics, and I'm unquestionably on team lipstick.  (If it wasn't clear before, then my compulsion to add two tubes to my Walmart pickup order for my I-got-dressed-today-if-even-for-five-minutes glamour shots clinches it.)  Nevertheless, that Chapstick commercial stuck in my head.  I liked Picabo's conviction, even if it differed from my own.  And even if she was being paid big bucks by Big Lip Balm.

So in these hanging-out-on-my-own days, I'm making the most of the deliciousness that is treat-flavored lip salve.  And it's pretty sweet.  Next up, sugar cookie.

That said, for today's sign-off, I thought it'd be fun to show my love for lipstick and for you, dear readers:


Thank you, Walmart, for all that you do.  And for braving the snow to tend those cherry trees. :)

Monday, June 1, 2015

On the Topic of Tropics Part Two and the Pull of Papyrus



 Mint Julep Jewel Necklace

Top: Wet Seal
Skirt: Marshalls
Shoes: Payless
Bag: Bueno, Marshalls
Belt: Candie's, Kohl's
Sunglasses: Michaels



 Spangle Tangle Necklace

Top: Merona, Target
Skirt: Marshalls
Shoes: Guess, DSW
Bag: XOXO, ROSS Dress for Less
Belt: Gifted
Sunglasses: Rampage, Boscov's



Pink Prism Necklace

Top: Macy's
Cardigan: Mossimo, Target
Skirt: Candie's, Kohl's
Shoes: Dolce by Mojo Moxy, Shoe Dept.
Bag: Candie's, Kohl's
Sunglasses: Michaels

Big, colorful blooms make great backdrops, as seen with this week's trio of rain florist-flanked rhinestones.  No surprise there.  Exotic flowers have a rep for being the most dramatic, both in appearance and temperament.  We turn to the hibiscus, the orchid, and the bird of paradise when we want to make a splash, whether it's by the pool or for some kind of formal (that is, if we're talking orchids -- and the formal's a luau).  Yet everyday blossoms breed their own brand of intrigue, however seemingly safe behind white picket fences.  Take the dandelion.  It's the Transformer of the weed world, magically morphing from a strong, sunny circle to a cloud of ethereal white fluff.  Or wisteria.  I only recently learned that this pretty purple vine is a ruthless tree strangler, a piece of trivia no doubt horded by horticulturists and "Desperate Housewives" fans. Yep, garden variety flowers have a certain cachet, whatever their super powers.  I'm so taken with them that I've decided, after years of thinking the venture hopeless, to grow a few of my own.       

Fledgling green thumb or not, like most people, I don't like change.  Despite all the conveniences available to help us cope in this cuckoo world, I find myself clinging to stuff that's old school (including the movie Old School, which airs on TBS about once a month).  I write checks instead of using online bill pay, listen to CDs instead of MP3s, take pictures with a camera instead of my phone, and watch TV in real time instead of On Demand.  But of all these outdated rituals, the one I enjoy the most is reading books on paper instead of a screen.  Because I want to experience it all.  Vicariously.  From the comfort of my couch.  And everyone knows that it's just not the same curling up with a Kindle.  So I was particularly pleased to have recently read this nostalgic nod of a passage in Sophie Littlefield's A Bad Day for Scandal

"(Stella) Paused at the book aisle.  Cast a sidelong glance down the neat rows of best sellers.  She used to love to read, her bedside table stacked with thrillers and mysteries and historical romances from the library.  Once Ollie was dead, she treated herself to an occasional hardcover - she loved the feel, the smell, the sensation of letting the pages flutter against her fingertips.  Only, ever since she'd taken up the banner in defense of the defenseless, it seemed like her days ended in the kind of exhaustion that didn't do well with reading a chapter or two." (177)

Although many a print book proponent gets all flowery about the feel of the pages, I never tire of hearing it (especially from a vigilante browsing a rural Missouri Walmart).  There's just something special, almost hallowed, about the aura of tangible objects, and that goes double for books.  They seem to have histories and personalities that can't be unlocked by a cold, charmless screen.  Now might be a good time to admit the irony of saying so on a blog (an acknowledgement that I've made at least once before in these some 1,000 posts).  But then again, a collection of ramblings, however colorful, is not the same as a piece of fiction, and so does not demand the same timeless trappings.   

Take that, Kindle.  You too, Ollie.  Because the pen is mightier than the sword.  Except when the sword is a Taser or whatever weapon it was that Stella was wielding when she did you in.  If there's a takeaway somewhere in here, then it's this: never cross a woman with a library card.  

Even though I think that libraries smell funny.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Catch a Tuna Christmas


When I heard that I was going to see a play called "A Tuna Christmas," I jokingly asked if it was about "The Office's" Jim Halpert.  Once ensconced in the second row of Cape May's Robert Shackleton Playhouse, I learned that it was not.

Still, the homespun satire that unfolded wasn't entirely different from the NBC sitcom in its not-always-gentle exposure of small-town folks' quirks and foibles.  Tuna, as it turns out, referred to a fictional small town in Texas - the third smallest town, to be exact.  Its tirelessly colorful cast of two dozen (mostly) narrow-minded local yokels was played to perfection by just two actors, Jody Cook and Turner Crumbley, no small feat considering that the mountain lion's share of the characters were women.  Cook and Crumbley mastered lightning-fast costume changes and personas that turned on a dime to deliver characters that we've all encountered, if not at the Tuna Tasty Creme, then at the nearest Walmart or church social.  Straddling the middle ground between cringe-worthy and sympathetic, they offered an introspective view into the hearts and minds of everyday people.  To be sure, "Tuna" explored censorship, prejudice, and heartbreak, so peppered with the spice of local radio, community theater, Christmas decorating wars, ne'er-do-well husbands, on-the-loose critters, and unfulfilled dreams that flavor the most trenchant of country chronicles.  

This isn't your grandmother's yuletide tale.  Ribald and real, "Tuna" is a slice of life that makes you laugh even through its sadness.  Having expected two hours of ho-hum holiday entertainment, I was engrossed.  Whether you be city folk or a cowpoke, you'll want to give "Tuna" a try.

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Bounce Goes the Bauble





Top: Kohl's
Skirt: Steve Madden, ROSS Dress for Less
Shoes: Charles Albert, Alloy
Bag: Gap
Tights: Kohl's

I don't know about you, but I still get excited when I see one of those old-school bouncy ball vending machines.  Knowing that just a few coins are all that stand between me and a colorful, rife-with-new-rubber-scent toy adds a special something to my day.  (Plus, bouncy balls are so much more dignified than those plastic domes full of slime.)  Designer Erica Domesek must be of the same mind, because this Big Ball Necklace is the very first project in her tons-of-fun do-it-yourself fashion book, P.S. I Made This


Now, you know that I'm not usually a fan of how-to craft books on account of their precise instructions and narrow ideas of how finished projects should look.  But Domesek's book is more of a sounding-off board for inspiration than a get-this-wrong-and-you're-a-hack primer.  The directions for the Big Ball Necklace were so easy that I read them twice just to make sure I wasn't missing something:

1.  Grab a pair of sheer stockings and cut off the legs.  Leave room at both ends (so you can tie your necklace together when it's done).

2.  Knot one leg (leave a little room at the end) and drop in bouncy balls, one at a time, tying knots between them as you go.

3.  Repeat the process with the second stocking leg.  Make sure that one leg has more balls.  This will serve as the bottom strand.

4.  Attach the legs together by knotting them.  P. S.  Get creative by mixing balls of different colors and sizes with a variety of textured stockings and tights.  The possibilities are endless.





The only bit of editorializing I have to add is that you should use the cheapest, sheerest pantyhose possible so the colors of the balls show through.  I began with a relatively pricey pair of Sheer Energy hose and needed to run out for some No Nonsense instead before I got it right.  I found mine at CVS, but you can buy them from any drugstore, or Walmart.  Also, my bouncy balls weren't as bright as I would've liked.  The fluorescent ones featured by Domesek were surprisingly impossible for me to find.  (And as long as I'm being honest, I got mine at A.C. Moore and Target as opposed to from the aforementioned and much-romanticized vending machine.)  Finally, I used too many balls and needed to extend the length of my hose with black tulle to use as ties.  Which begs the question, is this pantyhose and tulle contraption secure? I have no idea. I may very well find myself on a mall escalator in the near future sending balls flying and taking out shoppers.

Okay, so that was more than a bit of editorializing. Still, this project is so simple and fun that you'll (and I apologize in advance, but come on, you had to know it was coming) have a ball.  

Monday, January 3, 2011

Book Report: Safe Haven by Nicholas Sparks


Every Christmas the bf buys me the new hardcover Nicholas Sparks novel. This year's title was Safe Haven, the cover of which I glimpsed on one of our many Target excursions. "There it is!" I cried, pointing, my voice betraying more excitement than the sighting warranted.

That having been said, I was eager to start reading it when I unwrapped it on Christmas Eve and did so as soon as I finished Marley & Me. Maybe this would be a good place to shout SPOILER ALERT! because, as in all my book and movie reviews, I can't be stopped from giving away the ending. So, if you don't want to know, then stop reading now and come back later (if you want to). Maybe I should start putting SPOILER ALERT in all these posts . . .

But on to the discussion.

Not too far into the story, I realized that this book was . . . different. Although it had all the hallmarks of a Nicholas Sparks tearjerker - two single, salt-of-the-earth people, an aura of sadness, and a safe, sleepy North Carolina town - it also had a darkness, the shadow of which had surfaced only in one other Sparks novel, The Guardian. In that story, the darkness stems from a stalker, but in Safe Haven, Sparks takes that idea a little further, casting his heroine, Katie, as a woman on the run from her abusive husband (Kevin).

In many ways, this story is the stuff of Lifetime movies. You know, damaged woman flees violent man, eventually seeking refuge in the arms of kind man. But Katie's flashbacks are more spine-tingling than anything from a movie. As I read, I tried to imagine being married to a man who not only forbid me to drive, have a job, and make friends, but who decided how I dressed, ordered me to cook and clean like a servant - and beat me. The idea was terrifying and was made even more so by the glimpses Sparks offers of the inner workings of Kevin's head.

As you might expect, Katie's escape is chilling. She changes her appearance and her name, crashing in seedy flophouses and changing waitressing jobs every week, fleeing city after city until finally landing in Mayberryesque Southport, North Carolina. There she takes yet another waitressing job and rents a dismal cottage that she slowly but surely begins to refurbish. Her only friend is Jo, a grief counselor who lives in the neighboring cottage. At least she's Katie's only friend until Katie forges a fledgling relationship with Alex, the widower who owns the general store where she frugally shops for rice and beans. This in itself is a quaint notion, the tired young widower raising two small children and managing a general store (complete with lunch counter!) in a world taken over by Walmarts getting to know the quiet, beautiful woman who walks there (she doesn't have a driver's license, not to mention a car), trying in vain to shut the world out.

As per usual, Sparks spends his time describing Alex's wife and the brain tumor that took her life. She's been gone about a year, and Alex hasn't dated anyone since. These sorts of scenarios used to give me lots of trouble when I was younger. I would think, if there's just one person for everyone, and that person dies, then how can the person left behind end up falling in love with someone else? Sometimes the dead spouses in such tales were portrayed as giving their husbands or wives their blessing, outraging me even further. I've softened a bit since then and like to think that I would want the bf to find someone new should anything happen to me. Nevertheless, reading about stuff like this still leaves me feeling a little unsettled.

Alex and Katie's relationship blossoms tentatively. She's a natural with his children, and he appreciates what she's going through because he used to work with battered women as a detective in the army. (As corny as it sounds, I enjoy reading about good people finding love. But then, so must lots of other women, judging from the success of Sparks's novels.) Alex wants to marry Katie, but she reminds him that she's already married, even if under a different name. To be sure, even as she falls in love and begins to feel safe, Sparks reminds us that Kevin, drunker and more unbalanced than ever, is still out there looking for her.

As the story winds down to its inevitable conclusion, Alex asks Katie to watch the kids at night while he picks up a friend at the airport. When he leaves, it's one of those nail-biting moments, kind of like when you're watching a horror movie, willing someone not to open a door. Hours pass before anything happens, but Katie is eventually awakened by smoke and realizes that the house is on fire. What follows is a chaotic episode rife with near-death experiences. The short version is that Alex comes home in time to save Katie and the kids, but not before she gives Kevin an ass-whupping. The only casualties are Kevin (I think his death is self-inflicted if not intentional) and Alex's store. Yet the fireproof safe that Alex kept in his bedroom remains unscathed. In it is a sealed letter from Alex's wife to Katie (or, as she puts it, to the woman he chooses).

This is where things get a little weird. Katie's about to open the letter, alone at her house, when she notices that Jo's house is completely deserted and ramshackle-looking, as if no one has lived there in years. Before Katie even opens the letter she begins to think about her times with Jo. About how Jo asked her not to mention their friendship to Alex because she'd been Alex's grief counselor when his wife died, about how Jo had urged her to give Alex a chance, and finally, about Jo's untouched wine glass the one time they'd met for drinks. In a burst of The Sixth Sense-like clarity, Katie (and I) realized the obvious -- that Jo was the ghost of Alex's wife. I was embarrassed not to have seen it coming. I had known there was something off about Jo but had chalked it up to her being one of those nosy, buttinsky friend characters. I was also a little creeped out. But then, it was two o' clock in the morning, and I've been known to get creeped out easily.

Jo's letter to Katie is every bit as heartrending as you'd expect it to be. Sparks pulls out all the stops with his signature story-telling device - the letter. (On the back cover of this book he's even photographed poised over a notebook.) It adds a whole new dimension to the kind of love triangle between spouse, deceased spouse, and new lover that I described earlier. Knowing that Jo helped to engineer Alex and Katie's relationship makes the ending even more bittersweet. If you can read the letter (not to mention the book) without crying, then you're a stronger woman than me.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Book Report: (A Book with) Heart and Soul by Maeve Binchy


I picked up Heart and Soul, by Maeve Binchy, one day on impulse in Walmart. I was delighted and surprised to find a new Binchy novel out and gobbled through it in a matter of days. Like so many of Binchy's books, it was the story of a seemingly unconnected group of Dubliners whose lives become inexplicably intertwined. It's the kind of book that's so warm and charming that it makes you ashamed of complaining about anything. The characters are just so good. And not in that cloying way that forces you to ask, "Is this for real?," but in a way that makes you want to appreciate your own life more. It goes without saying that it had a happy ending. You know, once upon a time I preferred books with unhappy endings. I thought they were more profound. Perhaps I'm maturing.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Make and Tell Challenge, Day 86


Tonight I ate almost an entire bag of Smartfood popcorn for dinner, fell asleep on the couch for two hours, and somehow managed to finish this Violet Fierce Flowers Tote. It strikes me as girly yet edgy, perfect for any fashion-forward punk princess (and yes, that icky blue painters' tape does come off; I'm just waiting for the leopard to dry.) I'm excited that it's finished and am ready to move on to the next one. I have fewer than 10 blank totes left, which means I'm really churning them out. Time to hop back online and reorder.

Tomorrow jump starts the circus of holiday madness. But you know that. For me, it means that the bf and I will have Thanksgiving dinner with his grandparents and dessert with my parents; both houses are about 45 minutes away from ours, and their houses are about an hour away from each other. Then there was talk of my mom and I hitting some midnight Black Friday sales. I don't know. I've shopped on Black Friday for as long as I can remember, but never at that ungodly hour. I've always gone after noon, once I've had plenty of sleep and have refueled with leftover pumpkin pie . . . and the danger of being trampled has passed (didn't someone get trampled to death in Walmart one Black Friday? What a way to go.). It doesn't make sense for me to go early because I'm never looking for doorbuster items like toys or electronics, just clothes, cards, and trinket-type things. But I have to work this year, which is what brought on this uncharacteristic and madcap scheme.

Speaking of pumpkin pie, I've been called upon to whip up a batch of Libby's finest for dessert at my parents'. I mentioned this to a few people in passing, and they were like, "oh, you're not making them from scratch?," as if I were some kind of Thanksgiving dessert sell-out. It always annoys me when people act like you're not truly cooking if you're not starting out with flour and lard or something. It's not like I'm just buying a pie; I still have to mix the pumpkin pack with the eggs, sugar, etc, and bake it. Sheesh.

But back to the circus. Friday night the bf and I are dining on leftovers with my parents. Then Saturday my mom and I take on the mall again, followed by a Sunday casino trip chaser with my mom, sister, and grandmom. Somehow I don't think there'll be much making and telling going on. Or sleeping. It'll be fun and colorful, though. And hopefully blogworthy. :)

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Make and Tell Challenge: Day 41



Today I went shopping with my mother and picked up some much-needed jewelry findings. When I returned, I made another ribbon necklace with my remaining wooden beads (I still have a fair amount of my handmade magazine beads). At one point I ran out of the wooden beads and was forced to start incorporating some plastic ones, which really messed with the look of this necklace. Not that it looks bad. It's just not as vibrant as its predecessors. After taking a Desperate Housewives break, I moved on to a necklace involving this orange paua shell pendant, which I picked up in Walmart the other day. Who knew that was such a source for cute, affordable jewelry stuff? Anyway, I decided to make this necklace double-stranded, using gold glass bugle beads for one strand and rainbow glass seed beads for the other (both also purchased at the Wall). Although it has a simple, elegant look I can't help but feel that it comes up a little short. I'm regretting not picking up more paua shell pendants (they came in green and red also) to intersperse throughout the necklace to make it a real statement piece. Then again, that would be my taste, and not everyone likes over-the-top stuff. So maybe it's better the way it is. Besides, I can always make the more elaborate version later. Tomorrow I'm looking at another homebody day (hooray for Christopher Columbus!). Since most of my more mundane chores are out of the way, I'm hoping this means I can delve into some more exciting projects.