Flip This House; Fling This Bling

Darla Doll Charm Necklace

Top: Worthington, JCPenney

Skirt (a dress!): Macy's

Shoes: Betseyville, Macy's

Bag: Marshalls

Sunglasses: Rampage, Boscov's

Belt: Marshalls

Marvelous Mock Rock Necklace

Top: Candie's, Kohl's

Skirt: Modcloth

Shoes: Chinese Laundry, DSW

Bag: Gifted

Belt: New York & Co.

Sunglasses: Rampage, Boscov's

Egg McBluffin Charm Necklace

Top: Macy's

Skirt: H&M

Shoes: Betseyville, Macy's

Bag: Bisou Bisou, JCPenney

Belt: Kohl's

Sunglasses: So, Kohl's

Izzy Insta Glam Necklace

Top: Rampage, Macy's

Skirt (a dress!): Macy's

Shoes: Charles Albert, Alloy

Bag: Nordstrom

Belt: Wet Seal

Sunglasses: Rampage, Boscov's

 Merry Cherry Berry Necklace

Top: Candie's, Kohl's

Skirt (another dress!): Modcloth

Shoes: a.n.a., JCPenney

Bag: Nahui Ollin

Belt: Marshalls

Deco Diva Necklace

Shrug: The Limited, Marshalls

Tee: Marshalls

Dress: JCPenney

Shoes: Guess, DSW

Bag: Xhilaration, Target

Sunglasses: Relic, Kohl's

Belt: Cape Charles, VA shop

If you watch DIY or HGTV (or, you know, breathe), then you know that flipping houses is a thing.  People buy old homes for a song, fix them up, then resell them for a symphony.  Like any artsy-fartsy soul, I love the idea of making something old new again.  Or better yet, making something new even newer.  Which is why I bought these clearance necklaces from big box stores and embellished them to sell on Etsy.  The only difference is that my prices aren't nearly as inflated -- that, and a necklace goes wherever you do, whereas a house ventures only as far as the mailbox.  Of course, these days that's changing, what with Tiny House, Big Living and Tiny House Nation catering to wanderers who don't mind squatting on their parents' lawns.    

So, what's up with the second part of this post title?  I'm not sure.  "Fling this bling" doesn't sound like the real estate pun I'd intended (hey, punning ain't easy), but more like 1) a wealthy old dowager tossing off her pearls as she swings from a chandelier, or 2) an ill-fated tryst between a topaz and a diamond.  It's an old story.  Diamond's dad thinks that Topaz isn't good enough for Diamond, and Topaz's mom thinks that Diamond is too much of a princess for Topaz.  In a sort of reverse Romeo and Juliet move, the disapproving parents toss each other's offspring into the ocean, then run away to the Emerald City to head up a Munchkin outreach program.

Sigh.  Fine jewelry can be so dramatic.  That's why I stick with humble synthetics.

Play Gardens: A Rose by any Other Frame . . .

 Blue Religion Rampage Necklace

Top: Decree, JCPenney

Tunic: Marshalls

Skirt: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's

Shoes: Payless

Bag: Xhilaration, Target

Sunglasses: Michaels

 Yummy Yellow Rampage Necklace

Top (a dress!): Xhilaration, Target

Skirt: Modcloth

Shoes: Payless

Bag: Betsey Johnson, Macy's

Belt: JCPenney

Sunglasses: Relic, Kohl's

Prairie Pink Rampage Necklace  

Top: Macy's

Skirt: Holliser, Marshalls

Shoes: Nine West, Marshalls

Bag: Charming Charlie

Sunglasses: Mudd, Kohl's

  . . . would look just as sweet.  Sure, I snoozed through Romeo and Juliet, but that's no reason why I can't shamelessly repurpose one of Bill's one-liners for my own creative pursuits.  Clearly, the bard inspired me, even if only to frame my bulb-ous baubles with flouncy florals and experiment with Windows Live Photo Gallery.  The filters make these roses look tropical or stark or vintage, like Barbie dressed up for a luau, a black-and-white ball, or an old-timey dance (which is just like the ball, only with sarsaparilla instead of Sauvignon blanc).  Not to be outdone, the plant print dresses and skirts in this post are as glam as the very best greenhouse (hey, I challenge you to come up with a place as fancy and precious as a sunflower sauna).  But this is no case of style over substance.  These petals put themselves to the metal, providing a foundation strong enough to support the weird and wonderful wattage supplied by this latest installment of doorknocker necklaces.

So, the next time you're at an outdoor café and see a single red rose in a vase (or, because we're equal opportunity here, the next time you're at a swap meet and see a dandelion in a soup can), ask yourself this: Delicate flower waiting to be gobbled by gophers, or powerhouse of pollination destined to populate meadows?

I think we know what Bill would say.