Red, White, and Fruit: Sail Away, Sale Away, Snail Mail Play

This blog isn't always about the things that I make.  Sometimes it's about the things that I buy.  And the last best things that I bought were from Charming Charlie.  The online version, that is, as the nearest brick and mortar is kind of far from me.  Anyway, you know how sometimes you order something, and it comes and you're like, ugh, this sucks?  Well, this was the opposite of that.  (And no, Charming Charlie isn't paying me.  Although I kind of wish they would.  CC, if you're out there, throw some bangles my way tout de suite.)  Every piece was bigger and better than I thought it'd be.  I was especially excited because I'd first spotted the grape purse charm last year, and it was still in stock -- at half price!

Speaking of the funky bunch (and no, I don't mean you, Marky Mark), it's time for a rousing round of "one of these things is not like the others; one of these things just does not belong."  (Sing it loud, sing it proud, Bert and Ernie.)  'Cause we've got an anchor necklace; a red, white, and blue ice pop wristlet; and a star-spangled pouch -- which are all very nautical -- and a bunch of sparkly grapes -- which is not.  Unless, of course, the nautical in question refers to a yacht instead of a speedboat/sailboat/down-and-dirty dingy.  And what's a yacht without big, juicy grapes being served by Paul Rudd in a Speedo?  (Too far?  I was thisclose to calling this post Hoarder Up.  So.  Restraint practiced and all of that.)

That said, enjoy the soothing sounds of the Enya classic that has undoubtedly been playing in your head since you first scanned this title.  Also that not-so-soothing Styx classic.  I could go on, but like Michael Stipe, I've said too much.

So much for restraint.

Movie Moment: Rock of Ages

Rock of Ages is about rock and roll and the people who love it.  Set in 1987 in an LA bar called the Bourbon Room, its inked and studded players laugh, cry, and dream to the likes of Journey, Styx, Guns N' Roses, Poison, Motley Crue, REO Speedwagon, and so many big-haired others.  Although the movie highlights the seamier side of the era of excess, it is, at its heart, a universal yarn about falling in love and following your dreams.

Sherri (Julianne Hough) is the proverbial good girl who longs to make it big.  To be sure, when the movie opens she is literally "just a small-town girl living in a lonely world on a midnight train going anywhere."  Once on the Sunset Strip, her sundress and sunny disposition set her apart, and her prized suitcase full of albums is stolen almost as soon as she steps off the train.  That's when Drew (Diego Boneta) comes to the rescue.  A barback at the Bourbon, he gets her a job there waiting tables, much to the annoyance of crusty owner Dennis (Alec Baldwin).  She's a singer, he's a singer, and it isn't long before they're making goo-goo eyes in between serving drinks.  Meanwhile, Dennis and his right-hand man and very special friend Lonny (Russell Brand) book larger-than-life and out-of-control rock god Stacee Jaxx (Tom Cruise) to rescue the Bourbon from bankruptcy.  But Stacee comes with baggage in the form of his conniving manager Paul (Paul Giamatti), idealistic Rolling Stone reporter Constance (Malin Akerman), and the mayor's wife Patty (Catherine Zeta-Jones), who will stop at nothing to expunge him and his ilk from her fair city.  Inevitably, Sherri and Drew are mixed up in the maelstrom and eventually forced to find out what achieving fame really means.

Rock of Ages balances the badass with the sentimental and even the silly, often laughing at its own overblown homage to 1980s extravagance.  The fashion is fabulous, from Patty's prissy pastels to Stacee's most libidinous leather, and the pop culture references keep the camp coming.  But it is, of course, the nonstop rock of power ballads and arena anthems that make you feel as if you're at the concert of the decade.