Candy Cane Lane . . . but Make it Kooky

Once upon a time, candy canes came in only peppermint and sometimes, if you were lucky, cherry (which I loved because of their rainbow stripes).  But nowadays you can get them in almost any flavor, as evidenced during a recent outing when I picked up these:

That's right; you're looking at a soda lover's paradise of 7UP, Dr. Pepper, and A&W as well as -- wait for it -- that American classic, Twinkies!

When I saw these exotic offerings, I couldn't pass them up, even though I still had an unopened box of Hershey's mint candy canes from last year:

Believe it or not, I haven't sampled any yet.  They must remain "mint" in box, safe and secure in my underwear drawer, until December 24.  

Because that's when the Christmas treat train leaves the station . . . 

. . . and goes off the rails until New Year's.    

Complexion Confection: Matte as a Pancake

Shoes: Chase & Chloe, Zulily

I was going through my shoes the other day when I found these spectator T-straps and thought, Oh, they look like pancakes.  No, there isn't a different color for each foot (because I'm not Helena Bonham Carter; although that would be badass, wouldn't it?); I have two pairs, one yellow and one tan.  But together they reminded me of butter and maple syrup and made me miss the days when you could go out to brunch without fear of catching, not just ptomaine from a gross griddle grill, but the plague.  Yet they didn't make me miss it enough to make breakfast (let's not get crazy now).  Instead, they inspired me to unearth my old Fabulous Felt Pancakes barrette and build a new outfit around it.  

Fabulous Felt Pancakes Barrette

This barrette, as you may recall, started an argument between a mother and son (hashtag barrette brawl) in A.C. Moore back before that store became just another brick and mortar casualty and, consequently, a playground for rats.  Their dialogue went something like this:  Mom: "They're flowers!"  Son: "No, they're pancakes!"  Mom: "They're flowers!  Me (but only after they asked for my intervention): "They're pancakes."  Insert self-deprecating smile.  

Anyway, this sweater is one of my favorites (so cozy and yellow!), and the scarf all but screams Hershey's Kisses. 

Shoes: Worthington, JCPenney

Clockwise (starting with amber): Cloud Nine, Ocean City; B Fabulous; Mixit, JCPenney; Target; So, Kohl's

Sweater: LC Lauren Conrad, Kohl's

Skirt: Arizona Jeans, JCPenney

Breakfast pancakes, by the way, make me think of the other kind of pancake (lots of trains of thought going off the rails here), namely pancake makeup.  And the very best pancake powder on the market is Coty Airspun.  I've been wearing it since high school (except for a brief period when my stuck-up sophomore self would cover my zits with only Elizabeth Arden), and it's never steered me wrong.  Although light and airy (it's right there in the name: airspun), it provides incredible coverage, concealing blemishes so that my skin looks as matte and flat as, well, a pancake.  But then, Coty knows what it's doing.  The company's been cranking out this miracle makeup since 1935.  The big powder puffs on the canister even mimic those on the original cardboard packaging.  Which is so glam and retro.  And also kind of endearing.   

So, the next time I go out for a big stack of buttery pancakes, even if it's forever and a day from now on account of COVID, I'll be wearing a thick coat of this precious powder.  (Also, probably a colorful winter coat, but that's less relevant.)  

Because as many a wise and vain person has said, it's better to have pancake on your face than egg.