Top: Wild Fable, Target
Skirt: Dickie's, Dolls Kill
Boots: Apt. 9, Kohl's
Socks: Gifted
Bag: Olivia Miller, JCPenney
Belt: Wild Fable, Target
Menagerie Madness Rainbow Rampage Necklace
Blouse: Bongo, Sears
Skirt: Vanilla Star, Macy's
Shoes: Betsey Johnson, DSW
Bag: Sleepyville Critters, Zulily
Black and Cream Dream Necklace
Sweater: Hearts & Roses London, Zulily
Skirt: Arizona Jeans, JCPenney
Shoes: Penny Loves Kenny, Zulily
Bag: Tee Shirt & Jeans, Kohl's
Red bangle: B Fabulous
Cream bangle: Mixit, JCPenney
Top: TJ Maxx
Skirt: Arizona Jeans, JCPenney
Boots: Simply Vera, Kohl's
Bag: Betsey Johnson, Modcloth
Belt: Candie's, Kohl's
When I first saw the commercials for The Goldbergs spin-off Schooled, I was like, "What?! How are they going to have a '90s-something sitcom about Barry's girlfriend Lainey when the '80s-something Goldbergs is still on the air?!" But then I saw The Goldbergs episode where Barry (who's a high school senior) and Lainey (who's a college dropout) struggle to end their engagement, and all became clear. Although they're still in love, they don't want to get married. Because they live in the 1980s, not the 1890s! Anyway, Lainey makes the decision easy -- or as easy as it can be -- by leaving Jenkintown for LA to chase her dream of becoming a rock star with no more than a goodbye (VHS, of course) video. So, she's out of the '80s and out of Beverly's kitchen, freeing her to become the new chorus teacher at her old high school a decade or so later. Yet despite this tidy send-off/set-up, I remained suspicious. Would Schooled work or merely be a flash in the pan? Still, either way, I knew I would watch it. Because if there's a sitcom on TV, then I tune in. Even if it's one of the bad ones.
Luckily, Schooled turned out to be one of the good ones. I don't know if it was Lainey's classic underdog-meets-feisty-fish-out-of-water character, the abundance of chokers and plaid miniskirts, the sweet swell of '90s pop rock classics, or even the appearance of Brett Dier (Jane the Virgin's Michael) as curly coiffed English teacher extraordinaire and Lainey's nascent love interest. But I was sunk by the end of the pilot. The haunting yet hopeful strains of The Smashing Pumpkins's "Today" playing as Lainey's students mosh for their school concert instead of crooning a barbershop quartet might have cinched it. Because although I talk a lot about my love for '80s trends and pop culture, at heart, I'm a '90s chick (or, as Icona Pop originally intended, a '90s bitch. Why the FCC dubbed that out but let Meredith Brooks belt out her '90s anthem "Bitch" over the airwaves remains a mystery to me. Perhaps the '90s were a kinder, gentler -- and yet somehow more badass -- time.). People identify most with the decade when they came of age, and I'm no different. To this day, when I hear Weezer or the Cranberries or Better than Ezra or any other angsty group of that era, I feel this kind of euphoric melancholy (if there is such a thing), like nothing and everything is possible all at once. Although I like all kinds of music, it's this stuff that seems the best and most real to me, like it's delivering a personal message. You know. Like the super-intense, self-absorbed way you feel about everything when you're a teenager.
On a less introspective note, in the '90s I was also into plaid minis. I had dozens and now wish that I hadn't given them all to Goodwill. Fortunately, like rainbows, chenille, faux fur, checkerboard prints, and ring zippers,
they're having a moment again. So I restocked my closet. This week I put together not one, not two, not three, but four outfits in which Scotch skirts rule. Here they are by themselves, photographed Warhol-style:
That said,
Schooled has fashion, nostalgia, and nostalgic fashion all locked up. But more importantly, like
The Goldbergs, it's also a (putting on my adult voice now) quality program. Part of the genius of
The Goldbergs is that grown-up Adam's voice-over never tells you exactly which year it is, just that it's such and such a date in 1980-something. This frees the show to reference movies, songs, and fashions of the time in keeping with the storyline instead of the date without prompting nitpicky viewers to protest exactly when said stuff hit the market. Not that some viewers don't do that anyway (I've seen that Fan Corrections segment on
Conan; I know that there are basement-dwelling Internet trolls as far as a Nielsen box can reach). The point is,
The Goldbergs isn't about being a factually perfect chronicle of what happened during an iconic decade. It's not
The Eighties on CNN, or even
I Love the 80s on VH1. It's about creating a tribute to all the things everyone loves about this decade, all the little slice-of-life snippets that make it what it is in our memories. Also, the show is equal parts big laughs and heart, which is a sure-fire formula for any sitcom. No one wants to love a family who isn't funny, just as no one wants to laugh if they don't care about the family in the first place. And
Schooled is following in
The Goldbergs's neon pump footsteps. In addition to offering up relatable and hilarious characters, witty dialogue, and colorful costumes and sets, it continues its predecessor's pop culture pulse tradition. The first two episodes are chockful of '90s references including but not limited to Kurt Cobain, Zima,
She's All That, Discman, and
Mrs. Doubtfire. Also, the first episode opens with Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch's "Good Vibrations." If that doesn't set the tone for a bitchin' school year and TV series, than I don't know what does. So, gold star, Adam F. Goldberg.
Can't wait to see what you teach us next.