Showing posts with label Fashion Police. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fashion Police. Show all posts

Monday, September 8, 2014

The Leftovers




Top: Kohl's
Skirt: Ellen Tracy, JCPenney
Shoes: Worthington, JCPenney
Bag: Marshalls
Jacket: Mossimo, Target
Belt: Izod, Marshalls
Sunglasses: Rampage, Boscov's
Scarf: Wet Seal



 Emerald Impostor Necklace

 Amber Ember Necklace

 Pretty Peacock Necklace

Tee: American Rag, Macy's
Skirt: Material Girl, Macy's
Shoes: Payless
Bag: DSW
Sunglasses: Mudd, Kohl's



 Jungle Journey Necklace

Dress: Modcloth
Boots: Charles Albert, Alloy
Bag: Apt. 9, Kohl's
Jacket: Tommy Hilfiger, Marshalls
Belt: Wet Seal
Sunglasses: Relic, Kohl's





I'm not talking about that Justin Theroux series or last night's meatloaf.  I'm talking about the beads that you have left over after completing the projects for which you bought them (also about my leftover summer photographs, as flowers, smoothies, and purple bicycles should not go unshared).  You know how it goes.  Some plastic beads here, some glass beads there, with the odd extra pendant or cabochon thrown in.  More often than not, these odds and ends don't go together, and you're left wondering what to do with them.  Although this can be annoying, it's usually fun, kind of like making that questionable clearance rack caftan work with your wardrobe.  Lately, I've been trying to make necklaces that are more suited for everyday wear, and managing this mishmosh of supplies fits right in with that plan.

On a not-so-related note, I was recently flipping through some new magazines and was dismayed to find myself kind of disgruntled.  Not so much with the appearance stuff, which I take with a grain of salt (nothing like heeding the advice of Baz Luhrmann's "Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)": "Do NOT read beauty magazines; they will only make you feel ugly."), but with the pop psychology, how-to-be-a-better-person sort of stuff.  It's either stuff I already know, or stuff I don't want to know, like how to bake a gourmet turkey, how to do exercises at your desk, or how to strike up conversations with strangers.  I couldn't help but remember a college professor who had a negative view of women's magazines.  She said that they were all about convincing women that they needed to fix themselves, showing them how to be skinnier and prettier, better cooks, better lovers, better mothers.  Twenty-year-old me thought she was full of it.  Magazines were bursting with color and possibility, not to mention a welcome escape from my World Drama homework.  I think it took so long for me to realize their true duplicity because I never set out to do what they said, instead mesmerized by their splashy layouts like a child immersed in elaborate picture books.  Although still of that mind, I now find the content even less entertaining.  Stripped of such glitter, it all seems a little stress-inducing and judgy, the very antithesis of an indulgent diversion.

I think that's why I'd rather read novels, which are almost always enriching and peaceful.  I just finished a most restful example, A Week in Winter by the late great Maeve Binchy.  It tells the stories of guests at Stone House, an Irish hotel that serves up solace every bit as warm and restorative as its hearty soups (a ringing endorsement, as I don't even like soup).  Here's one of my favorite parts:

"Chestnut grove [not to be confused with the aforementioned Stone House; this book is teeming with inviting edifices] was a house that would have suited nobody except Eva: it was in poor repair, with a wild, rambling garden, very shaky plumbing, and unreliable electrical works.  She really couldn't afford the cost of maintaining it properly, and it might have seemed sensible to sell the place -- but when had Eva ever done the sensible thing? . . . There were clothes hanging in every room; on almost every wall there were hangers holding colorful, inexpensive dresses, often with a matching stole or hat.  Eva would pick them up at markets, car-boot sales, or closing-down sales.  She had never bought a normal dress in what might be called a normal shop.  Eva found the price of designer clothes so impossible to understand that she had refused to think about it anymore.  What were women doing, allowing themselves to be sucked into a world of labels and trends and the artificial demands of style?  Eva couldn't begin to fathom it.  She had only two rules of style -- easy care and brightly colored -- and was perfectly well dressed for every occasion." (355-356)

I found this passage to be so refreshing and carefree compared to the unyielding do's and don'ts espoused by the glossies.  Chestnut Grove sounds like the kind of house I'd love to live in, a magical mess of a place in delightful violation of most monthlys' rigid edicts.  The rest of the story is just as wonderful.  I hate hiking almost as much as I hate soup, but the book was so enchanting that I found myself wishing that I could stay at Stone House to walk its cliffs in an anorak and wellies.

And finally, as the last thread in this unraveling sweater of a post, the husband and I cannot imagine a world without Joan Rivers or a Friday night without "Fashion Police."  We followed her condition online until she passed last Thursday, somewhat bittersweetly during Fashion Week.  For years we tuned in weekly for Joan's colorful zingers, dissolving into laughter as she delivered one outrageous analogy after another.  Razor-sharp and unrelenting, Joan's wit was the star of the show, the celebrity fashions merely the window dressing.  Without it, our Friday night post-pizza snack will lose some of its flavor, and whatever we watch will be bland compared to its bite.  Rest in peace, Joan.  You always wore it well.

Friday, January 11, 2013

Book Report: I Hate Everyone . . . Starting With Me and Murder at the Academy Awards (both) by Joan Rivers



Joan Rivers is one crazy bitch.  Of course, as a "Fashion Police" devotee, I've always known this.  But it wasn't until I got between the pages of her latest book, I Hate Everyone . . . Starting With Me, that I realized the full extent of her relentlessly raucous wrath.  A polarizing figure if ever there was one, Rivers doesn't hold back, aiming her trademark snark at everyone from children to the elderly to voice the things that most of us are thinking but never say.  This doesn't mean that there aren't plenty of cringe-worthy, crossing-the-line passages.  But I decided to dismiss them, focusing instead on Rivers's take-no-prisoners tone and side-splitting humor.  Another reason I liked this book is that I frequently say that I "hate" things, even if to the tune of the fiance's mock-censorious, "Now, hate is a very strong word."  But like any self-respecting woman of extremes, I find it the best one with which to describe traffic, inclement weather, craft mishaps, unexpected prime time reruns, marred clothing, housework, slugs, technology, exercise, expired coupons, expired food, boring people, overbearing people, and people who hurt my feelings.  Needless to say, I gulped down Rivers's 242-page diatribe in a single sitting.

Her murder mystery, Murder at the Academy Awards, co-written by Jerrilyn Farmer, took two weeks longer to digest.  The best things about it are 1) the caricatures of Joan and her daughter Melissa on the cover, and 2) Rivers's snappy afterward, which was so amusing that it made me rethink my long-standing preference for fiction.  Still, despite this whodunit's slow start and boilerplate plot, it's fun to read because its stylish sleuth is Rivers's alter-ego, the fabulous and lunches-openly-with-her-plastic-surgeon Maxine Taylor.  Killers, paparazzi, and undercover rehab stints don't scare her, yet the sight of a slain starlet clad in a TJ Maxx knockoff sends her screaming.

Her E! network cohorts would be proud.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

TV Tuesday: The Snarky Stylings of E!'s Fashion Police

Normally, I'm not one for TV shows that make fun of people.  That's why I skip reality shows.  Nevertheless, I do enjoy the odd episode of E!'s "Fashion Police."  Hosted by queen of mean Joan Rivers and catty cohorts Giuliana Rancic, Kelly Osbourne, and George Katsiopoulis, the show scrutinizes celebrity red carpet and "off-duty" (think beach vacation) outfits and is seasoned by segments such as "Starlet or Streetwalker" and "Bitch Stole My Look," culminating in a best-dressed and worst-dressed pick at the end of the hour.  Now, when it comes to fashion, I'm pretty live and let live.  If something makes you feel good about yourself, then you should wear it, regardless of whether it's in style or what other people may think of it.  That having been said, if I were famous, then I'd probably be a "Fashion Police" repeat offender ("You've got too many things going on, sweetie, too many things," I can just hear Joan crowing.  "You look like a cross between a trannie and a circus escapee.")  Still, whether or not I agree with Joan and company's opinions, I can't help but be entertained and impressed by Joan's zinger-barbed wit.  Plus, it's fun to see all of the celebrity fashions.  I always wonder which stars choose their own dresses and which ones rely on a stylist, and if those in the stylist camp rip their stylists a new one after being the butt of Joan's arresting comments.  I also wonder if Joan ever gets hate mail, or if Hollywood regards her as a semi-sane grande dame to be indulged and humored.  But then, I guess the same question can be asked of any comedian.

Campy and irreverent, "Fashion Police" is an ornery oasis in the drought that is summer programming - whether you're wearing Miu Miu or a muumuu :)

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Dazzling Discounts at Daffy's

Top, Rampage

Top, Rampage

Top, Takara; Tights, Me Moi

Top, Rampage; Tights, Steve Madden

The bf and I were in Philadelphia today when I decided to pop into Daffy's. I'd never been there before but remembered watching an episode of the Style Network's old Fashion Police in which Robert Verdi was interviewing a woman on the street about where she'd gotten her outfit, and she'd answered Daffy's. As a shopper most at home combing clearance rounders, I knew I had to take a look.

The bf and I rode the elevator past the department store's first four floors to the misses and juniors section. (There's just something about a store with an elevator that screams, hey, country mouse, welcome to the city!) When the doors opened, I was greeted to racks heaped with interesting options and made a beeline for those that were the most colorful. (Hey, old habits die hard.) I was happy to stumble upon three festively printed Rampage tops that seemed to call my name, all at rock-bottom prices. I scoured the rest of the area, acquired one more fun top, then tried on my take. Everything fit perfectly, so I sauntered to the register with all the bubbling anticipation of an impending purchase. My total came to $34.13. The most inexpensive item was one of the Rampage tops, coming in at a super-low $4.66. Take that, Macy's!

On our way back down we stopped off on the third floor to peruse the shoes and accessories. (Well, I perused. The bf was patiently waiting as my ever-faithful supporter and driver.) I love shopping for accessories even more than I love shopping for clothes, so I was in my element. I picked out four pairs of patterned stockings, one of which was Steve Madden. This time my total was $21.30. Nothing to sneeze at considering that each pair originally listed for $18.00.

Back at the ranch, I decided to model my new buys, mixing them with items already in my closet. (Call it Photo Shoot Friday withdraw if you will.) I easily found interesting matches and arranged them all on my bed (I used to do this all the time after shopping trips) so I could gaze upon all the cheerful colors and patterns.

I'll be sure to return to Daffy's for more bargain hunting whenever I'm Philadelphia-bound. Truth be told, I wish there were a store a little bit closer!