Twitter is an interesting place. As I mentioned, I have my @DrZibbs profile and my @FatherKelly profile. On my Father Kelly profile I don't interact with people. But if it's a celeb or someone really interesting or funny I'll direct mail them and tell them that I have the Dr Zibbs account.
A few months ago I did that exact thing to Jessie - @Jezebelthegreat* is her Twitter profile. She's one of my fav people on Twitter. Just funny, interesting or smart-assy tweets.
And an on an interesting side note, she used to be an stripper. That's where lady's strip down and dance on stage. Sometimes poles are involved. They actually use the pole in their choreography! Here's an interview I conducted with the always cool Jez the Great over email.
1) What percentage of they guys really believed that the girls liked them and wanted to date them? Would the strippers laugh at how dumb some of the regulars were or did you kind of feel sorry for some of them?
See, this is where I really differ from other dancers. I was always 100% honest with my clientele if I was dating someone, and most of them respected that. I was one of VERY few women who didn't lie or give out fake phone numbers to make more money. I mean, there were some really dishonest dancers there, dancers who would make out with guys in the lapdance area while stealing the money out of their wallets. It was pretty bad.
And yeah, there were a few times that we laughed at the sheer audacity of some of the men who came in there. I once met a guy who said I needed God, invited me to church with him and then a few minutes later, told me he wanted a lapdance...but only if I'd let him "see it." Ugh.
2) So what was it like the first night dancing? Did you practice ahead of time?
I don't remember much about the actual night I started, but I CAN tell you that I wore my first stripper heels around the house for two days beforehand so I wouldn't fall once I got onstage for the first time. I also remember that I felt really, really awkward when I got there. One of the girls made her "regular customer" (a term used in the dancing biz) buy a lapdance from me and I was so nervous I thought I was going to puke (I didn't, thankfully.) Oh, and when I saw the pole for the first time I thought, "Yeah, I'm not so sure I wanna touch that thing. Hand sanitizer? Anybody? No?"
3) The stereotype is that strippers aren't smart but you're smart and hysterical. How did you get into stripping and is that stereotype true in general?
In 2002 I started dating a dancer. In the four months we dated, I went to see her a few times at her job. Her bosses and co-workers told me they needed more girls "with dark hair and big booties." Since I'd just quit my job, I considered it; plus, I'd gained too much weight and I knew dancing would be a great workout. Still, it took a few months to finally gather the courage to do it.
There are three basic stereotypes about dancers, and "being too dumb to do anything else" is one of them. I'm not going to say it IS true, because I've worked with quite a few women who are just as smart as I am (though not as funny...I'm one in a million, man), but at the same time...let's just say I could use big words around some of them and they would just cock their heads and say, "Wha...?"
4) Were there ever cat fights among the girls? And then it spilled out into a back alleyway?
Haha, "back alleyway." We had fights, of course, but most of them took place in the dressing room while someone held the door shut so the bouncers couldn't get in and break them up. I only got in one fight early on, and it happened in front of everyone in the club. After that, I didn't really have to worry about girls messing with me...especially after I started my dominatrix act. I was a little badass.
5)What percentage of clubs are girls "giving a bit extra"? If you know what I mean.
I only worked in five clubs during my dancing career, and only two of them were...lenient? on girls getting away with more than should be allowed. It was a little unnerving to try to do a lapdance when you look over and the girl next to you has some guy's dick in her hand. Yeesh.
6) What made you decide to stop dancing and what are you doing now?
I quit dancing this past June because a) I was 33 years old, I'd been dancing for seven damn years and I'd never planned on making a career out of it; and b) I'd started dating someone here in Detroit (I lived in Oklahoma) and we decided to move me here and "make an honest woman out of me," haha. He was worth quitting for; he's a great guy and he takes good care of me. I like being a nice, normal suburban housewife-type.
Also, there was no way in hell I was going to dance in Detroit. I don't have a death wish, man.
So my man Scope just wrote a post that asked bloggers to send him pics of their boobs (in bra or nude). To read the post click here. And in exchange, he is donating some money to some boob organization. I'm not sure if it's a club or what but it has something to do with boobs.
..and I think something about the preservation of boobs. Somethin' like that.
And it brought back memories of the bra pics I received in this post. Remember? It was the contest I had asking people to send pics showing the words "Google this: That Blue Yak".
Ahhhh. Memories. Google This: That Blue Yak. Indeed. And remember. If you want to send me pics of yourself. I encourage it*. We're all adults here right? Yup . We are.
And you can always take a creative picture where you write Google this: That Blue Yak. If you do, I will post it here on my famous blog and link to you. Go ahead -give it a shot. Don't be shy.
*No dudes.
Now here is someone that is just really smokin' hot...I give you Bombchell in Atlanta. Go check out her blog.
Damn girl!
You can also follow her on Twitter: @AtlBombchell
And speaking of good looking, here's the Friday (non Michael Jackson) send off song. With different music. RIP Farrah.
You will be remembered at our dart night as your poster hangs right below the dart board.
George Thorogood grew up about 30 miles from here. I never met him but One Bourbon, One Scotch and One Beer was a regular song that we'd pop into the car cassette player back in the day.
And it's today's Friday Send Off Song - dedicated to The Devil's Daughter in Law and Former Fat Chick. Thanks for commenting on TBY.
Is anyone a fan of this song or these blogging gals? Go ahead - tell me your answer in the comments region. Don't be afraid.
244 followers and they tells me it's a growin'.
People often say, "Dr Zibbs, where do you find these great videos?"
Well I've said it once and I'll say it again.: Skylers Dad is the master of finding the funniest videos. So much so, I'm considering having those words embroidered onto a pillow, then sending him a photo of the pillow. As a thank you.
Do you want to see a video about the world of the future? With tons of mentions of "robuts"? Sure you do.
Then check out this video and see what had me laughing hysterically this morning. And follow his blog while you're at it!
Please. Tell me what you think of this video.
When I mentioned Baby Rays BBQ sauce in a post last week I got a great reaction. And some suggestions on some other BBQ sauces which I'll be trying.
So I'd like to get a list of some other brands that people love. I'd love to try some of them out.
Here are some that I like:
Baked Beans: Bush's
Frozen Dinners (when necessary) - Stouffer's red box (mac and cheese).
Toilet Paper: Scott's
Potato Chips: Wise (regular). Herr's brand Kettle Chips.
Scotch: Dewars.
Processed Pie (single portion): Tastycake Cherry Pie.
Cake snack: Peanut Butter Tastykakes (nuke for 15 seconds)
Frozen Burger Patties (when I'm not making my own): Sam's Club burgers.
I know I'm going to think of many more but I'm in a rush and that's all I can think of off the top of my head.
I'm getting sick of my blog header. In case you're wondering, that's a picture of my deck and the racket is an electric tennis racket I use to kill wasps.
Anyways, I need a new header. Whenever I see great headers like on Avitable's blog or Whiskey Marie's blog (she changes it every few weeks) or Lilu's blog I get really jealous.
So how would YOU like to design my new header. If you want to, here's what to do:
- Design it and make sure it says "THAT BLUE YAK" clearly.
- Make sure that you save it in a format that's easy for me to open AND easy for me to put on my blog.
- And here's the great part - (talking like Ted Knight from Caddyshack): And why don't you just put "blog header designed by 'Your blog name here'" up there on the header too? hmmmm? Hmmmm? This way you'll get some advertising for your blog.
- I will leave the header up for at least two weeks! But I get kind of lazy so I may leave it up for months! Can you imagine?
- For the super lazy, just leave your header idea in the comments section. I encourage readers to steal the ideas and make them into a That Blue Yak noble creation.
And for the losers, you can post your losing header on your blog and I'll write a special post linking to it. Who knows, maybe I'll eventually use them all.
How about we say the deadline is Saturday (May 30) 5:00 PM - Eastern time. My email is in my profile. Just make sure to write "TBY header contest" in the subject line and the name of your blog in the subject.
And one more thing, make sure it's something that can be viewed by people at work. No naked people. I do have the right to say there are no winners you know. If you have any questions, ask me in the comments section.
And ready....go!
Here are some random things about some bloggers that read my blog. Maybe I'll make this a regular feature. Please visit their blogs and tell them Zibbs sent you. Remember, the more we mention each other's blogs, the more popular our blogs become. But of course it makes much more sense to mention a blog like mine - because it's a famous one. Choose wisely.
- Wendy B is a sweetheart and I love her smile. And she's a great jewelry designer.
- Earl and Slyde are two dudes that are as close to my group of real life guy friends that I know in my blogosphere.
- Ask Alice - is someone that has been absent on TBY for ages but I'm glad she's back. It kind of bums me out the number of people that have dropped out since last fall. I hope she's back for good.
- Jill from Caffeine Court is a long time reader. We're the same age and she went to a neighboring high school. I'd be surprised if we didn't meet within the next year. She lives in the same neighborhood as Springsteen you know.
- I think Scandalous Housewife is sexy. I'm glad that she decided to finally comment on my blog after I guilted her into it.
- I'm offering to help Shawn with her saggy boob issues. Except it's going to be really hard to help without seeing them. I'm a doctor damn it. Maybe she could do one of those construction paper silhouette deals that 1st graders do of their big ass heads. At least it would be a starting point for my diagnosis.
So are any of you fans of any of these bloggers? Also, do you want to be like me? Why don't YOU write a blog post about some other bloggers. Might as well start with highlighting me..just in case you're nervous and all.....
Happy Friday. The Friday Send Off Song is dedicated to Phat Mama since she mentioned me in a post. I'm not really sure if she's fat or not so no disrespect but the song is Fat Bottom Girls by Queen.
Why don't YOU mention me in a post. Give it at try. Don't be shy.
Crank it up and enjoy! TGIF!
215 bloggers and growing. Slowly for some reason.
Here are some real questions that I'd like some answers to:
- I wonder how I should approach Twitter to get more blog followers? And where does this all end? Am I just wasting my time?
- Does anyone else think The Office has jumped the shark?
- Is there any subject that you'd really like me to blog about?
- How long until voice recognition works really good so I can write blog posts while driving?
- I need to get one of those man scaping razors. But where to start?
- Does anyone have a really, really great coleslaw recipe?
- Does anyone do TM? How long does it take a person to really get good at it? And I have ADHD so I have a very short attention span so take that into consideration.
That's it - I've got it! I just thought of a great practical joke. Once I find a new reader that seems very vulnerable, I thought I could lead her on. Like I'm in love with her. You guys can help by leaving comments on her blog saying, "He totally likes you".
Then, on the wedding day, all of you guys can pretend to be my real life friends. And just when I'm supposed to say "I do" I'll say,
"I...I...(looking at you guys in church trying not to laugh)..I GOT YOU". Some one can crawl up behind her and and I'll push her over you so she falls on the floor.
Then the priest will pull off his fake mask showing he's some D list actor (maybe Screech from Saved by the Bell or David from Eight is Enough) and a huge drape will fall on the alter that's covering a huge monitor that's shows all of the people she works with watching this hysterical joke.
Then we'll all point and laugh. Is everyone in?
So I just got invited to a pool party by long time reader Philly number one. I need to look at my busy, important schedule but if I do go, I'd like to be introduced with this song by the Allman Brothers. The Statesboro Blues.
It might get expensive for them because it's a really long song so I'll be walking down blocks and blocks to get to their pool. So the sound system will have to be set up along my route. Then, when I finally arrive I'll slowly walk to the top of the high dive that they'll have to install per my contract and I'll do a splash into the pool on the last note.
Go ahead. Find a private spot in your home, close your eyes and imagine that you're there. Are you imagining that it's a swim club and when I got out of the pool you warmed me with a towel over my shoulders then we went to the snack bar and got hotdogs, nachos and two cokes? Don't lie. That's what you're dreaming about.
Now snap out of it and go get your chores done.
What a year here at That Blue Yak. Could you imagine how dull and terrible your lives would be if I didn't bring you free, daily sunshine? Probably worse than rural India. Do you know they don't even have toilets there?
Here's a quick throw together year end recap of this blog. I've also added some things that may happen in 2009.
Number of posts written this year. Not including this one - 422.
Greatest Accomplishment - Having over 100 followers that have unknowingly signed up to kill for me or sleep with me.
Top Curiosity I Have About My Readers - How often they discuss this blog with friends and coworkers*. (Please leave details of your amazing stories in the comments section).
Top Goals For TBY Content in 2009 - Make some more original videos. Click here to view one of the few I've made.
Top Thing I'll Order Blog Readers To Do For Me in 2009 (In addition to killing for me and sleeping with me) - Leave more comments on the SnapVine Recorder - located on my sidebar. Don't hesitate. Do it now - there are some open lines. Or tonight when you're good and drunk.
Top Thing I've Neglected To Do - Send the prizes for the people that won my contest. I promise I'm gonna do it.
Top Thing a Reader Can Do To Show Their Appreciation - Get a That Blue Yak tattoo. Or at least buy a TBY T-shirt or mug. Click here to order.
So that's probably it folks. Have a great time celebrating tonight! See you next year!
*And I want everyone to come clean on this. With how many loyal readers I have, there has to be at least one nut out there who has stapled a face from a magazine onto a pillow, then attached the pillow to a mannequin body that they got from a yard sale and they pretend that it's me - Dr Zibbs. And then when a friend stops by, they panic and shove the Dr Zibbs figure into a closet because they're embarrassed. C'mon - don't lie. Someone has to have done something like this.
(as many of you know, some sexy business has started with Gwen the blogger. See parts one and two, then clean yourself off and read on).
...so the love making went on for hours. Dr Zibbs needed some energy so Gwen made him a hearty breakfast that included some eggs Benedict and some freshly squeezed OJ and then it continued...
Gwen: (lying on Zibbs and playfully twirling his hair) Are you ready to go again?
Zibbs: After being revitalized with that heavenly Bearnaise sauce my dear? Of course.
So one of my best and longest blogging friends Gwen was in my dream the other night. We do email each other so I sent the details to her. As a special gift to my readers, I will now share the details with you. And for those of you that have started to wisely collect THAT BLUE YAK memorabilia, you may want to print this out and hide it away. Letters, historically have proven to be a very wise investment.
Please note that this is the actual content of the email. Spelling and grammar have not been proofed by my staff as this is a real, personal email from one blogger to another.
Also, the contents are very sexy so you may want to make sure you have thick undergarments (in case of "leakage"). You also might want to read it in private as well, in case you get the urge to touch yourself. I'm just warning you.
Here is the letter:
Here we go..So a bunch of people were at a bar - including
So Friday was the night I told you I was going to meet some bloggers in person. Talk about a great time. As I told you, I knew what JDizzle and Smoochies* looked like but they had no idea what I looked like.
So I'm sitting at the bar at The Note and I see them. I watched (stalked) them for a few minutes to feel them out. I wanted to build the suspense. So I'm just about to go over, and I see this guy that I met a few weeks ago at an event. His name as of yesterday is Swedish Chef because we later convinced him to start a blog. So I tell him the situation and ask if he wants to play a joke. So this is what happens:
Swedish Chef approaches JDizzle
Swedish Chef: Excuse me, have heard that Dr Zibbs is in the house?
JDizzle: What? He is?
Swedish Chef: He is.
JDizzle: Are you him?
Swedish Chef: No. I'm not Dr Zibbs.
(I'm standing with my back turned to the scene. I then turn around).
Dr Zibbs: JDizzle? I'm Dr Zibbs.
JDizzle: Ahhhhhh!!! Oh my God!!!
Hugs are exchanged. I swear that there were some tears of excitement in JDizzle's eyes but she'll have to come clean on that herself (fingers covering mouth) Tee hee hee.
We then were laughing and talking as if we were old friends. She was one of the earliest commenters on my blog and although she said she reads it all the time she said she just doesn't comment as much but PROMISED me she would.
Smoochies was getting a drink so I went over and did a similar intro to her. Same deal. Super sweet and funny person. So the night goes on, we're all hanging out and then they invite me and Swedish Chef back to JDizzle's house, along with the group of 15 or so people that were with them.
And that's when the real fun started. Do you know when you meet people and you instantly really like them? Well this was the case with this crew. The drinks were a flowin', everyone's laughing and then JDizzle pulls out a box of wigs and says everyone has to wear a wig.
As the music's playing, the next phase began. A lightsaber fight. So we're taking turns posing with light sabers and JDizzle is taking these great pictures**. I'll post some when I get them. The only "issue" was when Swedish Chef accidently hit this cool model of the solar system that was hanging in their bar room and Jupiter fell off. Or it could have been Uranis I forget. I shit you not that we couldn't find it. It turned up later. One of their dogs had grabbed it and was chewing on it in the other room.
Anyways, meeting these bloggers in person was way cooler than I ever would have suspected. Tons of laughs. What a great night! And I'm sure we'll see each other again soon.
So that was my night meeting some That Blue Yak readers. And everyone should visit their blogs too and say hello***. And don't even try to bribe them into selling you any of my DNA that may have come off in the wig or on the light saber. I suspiciously saw someone carrying the precious DNA smeared light saber out of the room while wearing cloth gloves. I was very clear with everyone there about my fear of cloning. Or was it clowning that I was babbling about? Who knows.
So who will be the next to meet me? Maybe it will be you..or you......or even YOU!
So the weekend kickoff song is by Missing Palmer West. They'll be playing in West Chester tonight at The Note. Local bloggers JDizzle and Smoochies are gonna be there. I've never met them in person so it'll be pretty cool. If I go that is. I need to see if any of my lame friends can go out on such short notice. And of course I need to make sure my Zibbs skull topped walking stick is nice and polished. The blogger Kimmie also expressed some interest in going. I'd like to meet her too finally.
If you're going, the other two bands playing are Cheers Elephant and The Shackeltons.
And as for Gwen's Hot Blogger Holiday Hookup happening in Saint Loius this weekend, make sure to take plenty of pictures and make notes of all discussions that have to do with me.
And now, here are the same breasts from my last post but these are in living color. Note that this is a different picture. They are touching. Aww yeaah! And the reader who submitted these just told me today that both bras are hers. I didn't get into asking her about what happened in the changing room. I just took them and nodded graciously.
And I'll also tell you what makes these photos great. For someone that's seen a lot of boobs, it's not just that these are perfect. It's that these are from readers. The only time I go to strip bars is when it's for a bachelor party. And honestly, I couldn't care less. But if a lady in everyday life exposes some cleavage, it's a good day. It has to do with the setting. Can any of you guys chime in and tell the ladies what I'm talking about?
I'm going to dub it the Lambada effect. The Lambada is the forbidden dance, and seeing cleave on the sly is the forbidden glance (note the clever rhyme).