Et tu AGAIN, Starbucks?!?!

I cannot believe my favorite hi-test shoppe would carry this flagrant TBDOA offense. And it's some kind of white supremacist soldier on top of that.

Et tu, Starbucks??!? Et TU???

I'm not sure what Other Animal this Teddy Bear is dressed as, but it is just one of a whole coven living in a basket at Starbucks.  I think maybe a werewolf, but if a werewolf then unlike any I have encountered in my vast experience.  It is purple, with a purple mane like the cowlick of a ridgeback.  The costume has claw-hands from which the teddy's round paws emerge, defenseless.  All in all, a travesty and a horror.  My companion at Starbucks, seeing me taking this photo, said, "cute."

Year of the Rat

With the Year of the Rat coming to a close, I seized the opportunity to show the Starbucks collectors item -- a Barista Bear dressed as said rat. Next year is the Year of the Ox ... I am still hunitng for that keepsake.

Ted's Very First Sighting!!!

My friend Ted, who is new to the TBDOA phenomenon, has sent me the following image of despair from his cellphone:

Bears holding Bears!!!!

He says that Starbucks is in on the giant conspiracy/obsession. But we knew that, didn't we? Nice work, Ted! You are now a proud member of the apocalypse-spotting league.

Dressed-up bears holding toy bears!!!!!!!

At my favorite Mom-n-Pop coffee shoppe!!!

Oh nooooo!

Signs.

Oh yes, my children. Even in the sanctuary of the cozy mom-n-pop coffee shoppe I found myself in this past weekend, there are creeping signs of The End to Come. Gaze now at our peril:

Imagine, if you will, the tiny little immigrant woman, stitching day into night and night into day, on tiny little down coats for bears. How does she not kill herself, how does she look into her own eyes!?!?!?!? Well ... I guess if my family got free soy no-whip lattes every hour on the hour, even I could be a whore for the Bad Guy.

Onward. Astute Armageddon-spotter Lee Ann sent me these two items.

Bears going postal has been seen before, albeit not quite so alluringly shrink-wrapped. But this next bit ....

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Wait, let me catch my breath.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! What the blue hell is that thing?!? A doll, baby bear thing. You know I love dolls, right? I mean ... I just ... aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I'm having involuntary spasms and urine leakage. I gotta go cry somewhere.

It Begins

I don’t understand stuffed animals dressed as other animals. It’s creepy and perverted. Today at Starbucks (yes, I support this behemoth, so what?) I saw a whole basket of bears wearing frog costumes. I’ve also come across bears dressed up as bumblebees, ladybugs, ducks, and rabbits. Don't even get me started on bear vegetables, or we'll be here all night. What is that all about? Isn’t it enough just to carry a stuffed bear?!? Isn’t it enough to be a stuffed bear, for chrissake?!?? Does it have to be a bear and a frog at the same time? I’d like to have witnessed the unfortunate copulation that resulted in such a freakish toy.