Deanna Doss Shrodes

"Depression hung over me like a black cloud...and it was hard to find my way out at the time..." These were my words during a sermon a few years ago and afterwards a lady rushed up to me and said, "you mean YOU were actually depressed? Because I can't even imagine that. You seem so...together... " Truth be told, all of us go through hard times. And all of us have rotten days. Me included. I happen to be having a good day today. But a while back I was having an absolutely horrible day. And because so many people seem to think people like me never have bad days like they do, I got the brilliant idea, "I'm going to video record my bad day!!!" Yes, I know that's kind of bizarre but I have a passion to share transparently with people.That's why this blog is about transparently leading and relating from a faith perspective. So I did what was for me, a courageous thing. I recorded scenes during 24 hours...even waking up in the morni...

Did you know that half of all American workers do not use all of their allotted vacation time? Another recent poll by Hotwire.com reported an even larger number of unused vacation days -- more than a week's worth, with older Americans taking even fewer days off. I realize the fears you may have about putting in a request to take vacation -- time that already belongs to you, at that. Some believe it's just too risky to be off the radar for a week or two in what is an extremely volatile job market. A friend of mine recently remarked that they won't take off right now even with a large amount of time accrued because they don't want to be "out of sight, out of mind" with management. I understand all that. There were a few years, Larry and I took no vacation time. Absolutely zero. It was easy to slide into that mode because times were tough and we thought not taking off was the best solution. It's one of my biggest regrets. If I had it to do over ag...

Two high students may take math class for the same amount of time per week, however one takes a class that is more difficult. A weighted GPA is based on the idea that some classes are much harder than others, and these hard classes should carry more weight. In other words, an 'A' in calculus represents a greater accomplishment than an 'A' in remedial basic math. I am also of the belief that our work hours are weighted. This may explain why you may work less hours than you used to, but be under more stress. It may also explain why you might have the same job title in the same location, and be under greater stress this year than last year, depending on your current portfolio. I have served as a pastor for 25 years, the last 18 of which have been with the same exact job title/position. During various seasons I have worked anywhere from 30-90 hours a week on church ministry alone, depending upon current needs. At one point my husband questioned me about why I ...

             You must welcome change as the rule but not as your ruler.  ~Denis Waitley Early yesterday morning before I left for the church office, a big change was suddenly thrown into my life. I realize seasons of change in life are the rule not the exception. And I like what Waitley said that change is the rule, but not our ruler. While I was processing this change I found great comfort in a few things... Getting out of the bathtub and seeing that Max and Maddie had taken up residency in mine and Larry's bed, with Max's paw wrapped around her...always warms my heart. Larry just had to take a photo even though we've seen it so many times... Prayer in the sanctuary that I customarily lead every Thursday morning at Celebration ... Reading Jesus Calling... Completing all my customary church ministry duties... Coming home and riding my bike for a longer time in weather that couldn't have been more perfect...no...

In your business, or ministry are people eager to take your calls or do you play endless phone tag? Do people get excited when they hear your voice on the phone? How quickly do people return your calls? Do people want to help you?  Are you the family member that makes other family members praise the Lord that caller ID was invented? These are things you might want to think about. Nobody's responsibilities are peachy 100% of the time. We all have parts of our job or our life that we may not enjoy as much. A lot of people procrastinate or put those things off, simply because they aren't looking forward to it. I'll admit, I do it too at times. Today I had a draining call and after I hung up needed an Advil. And I thought to myself, "What's the takeaway from this? What can I learn from this?" Rather than ruminate about the call and how I thought the other person should change, I decided to relate it to improving myself which is the best thing any...

People who are most effective in life have in common that they get things done regardless of what comes up.  Dependability is one of the most important soft skills a person can possess. Right now you may not feel like you're at your optimal best with hustle and bustle and holiday stress. I know the feeling. The other night it was all I could do to get through a rehearsal, I was so physically and emotionally exhausted from the extra holiday load.  Then a few days ago a cold sore showed up on my lip -- always one of the telltale signs that I'm stressed. But I know that my success depends on me pushing through the more challenging days and doing what needs to be done in spite of the way I may feel. Your success depends on that too. Here are five things that help me to press on when I feel like stopping or procrastinating: 1) Start the day with a bit more self care For me this means extra time to get ready in the morning.  I like to start my day quietly with just ...

Do you take all your time off?  I didn't used to and it was a huge mistake.   A recent survey revealed that for most American employees, eleven vacation days a year are left unused, and almost a third of employees are "too afraid to ask for vacation" in a time of high unemployment and job insecurity, according to the Daily Mail.  The survey also revealed that not taking vacation days resulted in anger problems among staffers. A lot of people ask me how I manage several jobs at once.  In fact, it seems to be a focus of what people ask me  about most. I will say that I do better with several jobs and all my vacation time than I did with one job and little to no vacation time. The reasons I didn't take vacation in the past were noble.  I meant well and even spiritualized it.  But, it actually worked against me, not for me.  It's important to take all of your time off, particularly if you're a pastor -- I encourage you to  take every ...

Can feelings be turned on and off? Absolutely.  They change often with most people.  That's why we have to stand on what we KNOW to be TRUTH, not our feelings. There were good parts of today.  We had two fantastic choir practices (adult & youth) and God is up to good things.   At the same time some stressful things happened today.  More challenges happened than amazing things.  I like amazing more than I like challenging.  I'm sure most people would be in sync with me on that. My feelings today are a potpourri. I read a quote by Pastor Steven Furtick today that said, "You don't get to choose whether things in your life get shaken.  You just get to choose what you stand on."  I am reminded that my feelings may change based upon what is happening around me but I can't be led by my feelings.  Emotions are terrible leaders. Feelings are important. They can be fun and amazing or they can be painful.  I wouldn't want to li...

"That doesn't work for me." Good.  Now say it again, this time with more confidence. "That doesn't work for me." No need to be snooty,  just calmly repeat: "That doesn't work for me." Repeat this line anytime somebody is presenting you with something that is stressing you out needlessly. Someone recently suggested this response to me and it was an epiphany.   If something doesn't work for me, I don't always have to do it.  There are some non-negotiables we all deal with -- necessities for our family or workplace.  If you don't keep certain bases covered your family will not survive and neither will your job.  Of course we all need to cover those.  But I'm talking about non-essentials that are others expectations that they place on  you, or ways of doing things that they are pushing on you that  stress you out and don't add value to your life or even shorten your life. Just say, "I'm sorry but that wo...