Crucial Youth

01. Crucial Youth - The Posi-Machine, 1988 Vinyl LP Album      New Red Archives, New Red Archives - NRA02, NRA 02 02. Crucial Youth - A Gig Too Far, 1991 Vinyl 7" EP      B-Core Disc - B-CORE-5 Who would have thought that what was a joke in 1988 could now pass for actual opinions? Enter Crucial Youth, the best parody of the 80s straight edge HC patronizing mania. Today's SJWs and safe space crew will not get it, but the rest of us can have a good laugh, at least those old enough to remember the value or provocation and artistic offense. Musically, Crucial Youth are competent in their generic rendition of generic HC and even grace us with a cool Agnostic Front cover. It is actually musically close to Sick Of it All and it is actually better than Youth of Today or Bold, but I am biased, I cannot listen to YOT nor Bold. Basic fun HC in the spirit of Stikky, just not as fast, with as many laughs and great riffage from the central repository of rapid punk! Unizersal crucifixion of the old youth of today! Be straight, don't be late, bench your weight, don't ! Remove brackets and unzip: [youthanizer] !ZER Crucial Youth ZER!

Crucial Youth - the posi-machine

Crucial Youth - the posi-machine, 1988 NONE MORE POSITIVE! Everybody agrees that the straight-edge boy-scout trend has been one of the best jokes since day one (but yo, still less funny than the Christian hardcore scene, alright). Yet it was necessary, the hardcore scene HAD to demonstrate that it could be as religiously cretinous as the satanic black metal fart (and Manowar). We need democracy at all levels of the IQ scale. Crucial Youth took it on themselves to work on the topic and here comes their cult '88 album of pure positiveness. Standard moderately-thrashing hardcore but the best lyrics since Barbara Streisand! MEET THE MOST POSITIVE ZER IN THE WORLD!!! Ok now let's go smoking joints at the NoMeansNo show, ZERRRRRR R R R R RRRR!!! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Have a nice week-end. Positive milk-white vinyl rip. Buy the CD version Buy the CD collection of the singles BE STRAIGHT ! DON'T BE LATE ! BENCH YOU WEIGHT ! DON'T MASTURBATE !