Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Geographic Non-monogamy

I believe in monogamy. Truly. But geographic monogamy? I don't know... It's just... I keep falling in love with different places.

I just had a very strong reaction to NYC. Like, I'm a little obsessed with it, actually. Just looking at a map of it has me all... dreamy.

But then, this is what happens to me. Quite a bit. I tend to fall in love with places. I fall in love in some way and to some extent, with just about every place I go. In fact, I'm not sure I can think of a place I've ever been where I thought, "Man, I don't ever want to come back here..."

Every once in a while, the response is strong. Stronger than just my typical, "I love to travel, would totally come back here again and can even imagine a whole different fantasy-life living here." You can't live everywhere, of course. So usually, if the response is strong, I eventually end up living in the places that elicit that strong reaction. At least at some point. For a while.

I've been to NYC several times before. This recent visit, however, was just... intoxicating, I guess.

You know, you can know someone for a while and think s/he is an interesting person and appreciate her/his friendship and see that other people find her/him fascinating and therefore you can acknowledge her/his value and all... and then one day that someone is suddenly substantially more intriguing. Attractive even. Now you keep thinking about her/him. Who knows why exactly but your perspective... changed.

Well, that's what just happened to me and NYC.

It's weird to be having such a strong reaction to a place that feels entirely out of my reach. As in, it's expensive. And working/living there? Hrm. With a child? Double hrm.

But, it's a just a crush. I mean, I'm in a relationship and I'm really happy with it. I remember falling in love with her(e), too. And finding my way to her(e) was a great accomplishment, given the circumstances. (The context for that comment is really an entirely separate post.) And I liked coming home to her(e). And she holds no expectations of me. She doesn't get jealous when I date others. I know she is completely unaffected by my fling with NYC... That's how it's supposed to work, right?

“For my part, I travel not to go anywhere, but to go. I travel for travel’s sake. The great affair is to move; to feel the needs and hitches of our life more nearly...”
—Robert Louis Stevenson

8 comments:

  1. Oh my goodness. You've managed to put into words something I've flirted with for years. Cheers! Brava! Well said!!

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  2. i LOVE new york! i too, have flirted and still dream about living there. but i know that i am exactly where i am supposed to be at the moment.

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  3. Short visits sow romance.
    Long visits sow reality.

    My guess is your visit was less than 5 days? NYC is great, no question about it... but a short vacation shows more of the chrome and less of the rust.

    Yeah, kinda like the few first dates.

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  4. My brother's basement apartment is available for rent :) tee hee!

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  5. I have big love for NYC too. And especially love that people think I am from there when I visit (for my fast talking and certainly not my language..haha).

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  6. Very clever! I've been having a love affair with NYC for 10 years. Actually it's been more like lust and now I'm thinking about other places. NYC is a little too high maintenance for me at this point in my life. I'm looking for a relationship with someplace more laid back. So Steve and I are thinking about moving to Queens...still part of NYC and I can get to Manhattan when I need her(e), but a lot more like suburbia.

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  7. We should form a support group - laugh.

    I'm fairly certain that if I ever visited the Caribbean I would NEVER come back. Forget work, family, resposibilty...ok, the family can visit.

    Seriously, sand, sun, maybe a hurricane. I can take it!!

    Where's my beach chair?!

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  8. I do the exact same thing. And then I always feel like I'm homesick when I'm not in the place I'm currently in love with. For the most part I'm in love with Eureka Springs, AR (I know, I know, ARKANSAS!? But yes, it's an incredible place) and I'm in love with the idea of Ireland even though I've never been there. I know when I go I will want to move immediately.

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