Where There's a Will...

I have a screening this afternoon. The movie may or may not have this fellow in it. I'm not saying! But I am going to put him in front of you until I'm back in a couple of hours anyway. Bye til then.

Diego Calva Eight Times

I can't remember if I did a post about this but you can rent the queer drama On Swift Horses from the usual places now -- that's the one that has a lot of Diego here romping about with Jacob Elordi, plus the architectual revelation that is Will Poulter's ass. I mean there's more to the movie obviously but those are the main selling points says me. Here is my review from when it was in theaters. A mixed one for sure, but I'd like to re-watch it sometime -- there's a sweetness and a tenderness to it that will probably make for a nice comfort watch down the line. Anyway these fine new photos of Mr. Calva dropped this week thanks to Behind the Blinds magazine, where you can also read a chat with the actor (lots of sex talk natch). Or just hit the jump for the photos...

Good Morning, World

I had to check the calendar twice to make sure it was actually Monday before I said, "Happy Monday!" -- last week's holiday schedule has discombobulated me fully -- but tis Monday, so Happy Monday and here are a pair of gifs of Jacob Elordi in the movie On Swift Horses to make it happier. Okay movie, this one -- you can read my mixed review right here. It's available to rent online in all the usual places right now and there are worse ways to spend a couple of hours than Jacob Elordi and Diego Calva having lots of sex and Will Poulter showcasing his incredible edible bum. Indeed don't be surprised if I come back to share more gifs from this movie throughout the week. Anyway, onward. It's Monday, did ya hear?

Good Morning, World

Let's start today off with a little Kit Connor since Alex Garland's war film Warfare has dropped onto VOD today. (You can also pre-order the 4K and blu-ray right here.) And no this gif isn't from Warfare, which unfortunately doesn't feature a group shower scene before the ridiculous cast oif hotties (also including Joseph Quinn, Noah Centineo, Pharaoh Woon-A-Tai, Cosmo Jarvis, Henrique Zaga, and on and on and on) heads out to battle -- although we do get Joseph Quinn insinuating group masturbation for a moment, and yes I have written out that whole deleted scene mentally-speaking several times over. No that gif is from Heartstopper, the show that introduced Kit to the world and turned him into a thing. (A thing!) And yes that's the gay show, the beloved gay show that I haven't watched yet. Leave me be, I'm busy dammit. (Busy mentally writing war-time circle-jerks apparently.) Anyway here is my review of Warfare over at Pajiba -- a mixed one but I still think the movie's worth seeing, even if I have some issues. (Issue number one -- no circle jerk...)

Man to Man, Body Muscular

I haven't thought of the Ashton Kutcher led prank series Punk'd in a very long time but I read this morning's news that there is a zombie movie starring Kit Connor, Will Poulter, and Manu Rios(!!!) being shopped at Cannes and I felt the need to peer around all the surrounding corners lest a hidden camera be watching me. I mean -- this is casting via MNPP's side-bar! WTF. The movie (if it's real and not a joke specifically on me) is called Rapture and it's set in Medieval England and it will be written and directed by the Canadian author and playwright Jordan Tannahill (first time movie director though) -- and with that cast you shouldn't need to ask but yes, Tannahill is gay. 

Anyway Rapture is set in the year 1348 and our beautiful boys will be playing monks who hear word of a mysterious plague ravaging the land that's turning people into "revenants" aka the undead aka the living dead aka zombies, yo. The film is set to start production in Hungary later this year -- Poulter & Connor of course just worked together (and dug around in each other's trousers) in Warfare. Spanish special-effect Manu Rios, well, he was the surprise ace card that told me how gay this project really was looking.

Horses Be Swifting

I so rarely post on the weekend that some of you might've missed this down below and that'd be a shame -- my review of the "Jacob Elordi and Diego Calva go gay for each other" flick On Swift Horses dropped over at Pajiba yesterday, read it here. And here is the trailer if you missed that. The movie is okay but I do have some issues with it, unfortunately -- I wouldn't say it's not worth seeing, but that might just be Will Poulter's perfect ass making me say that. It's holding a gun to my head! (I wish.) And did I actually write this entire post just so I could post the below gif of said perfect ass today? Hmm we'll never know, I guess!

Diego Calva Gives Good Attitude

As mentioned on Friday morning in our Jacob Elordi post and Friday afternoon in our Will Poulter post the queer melodrama On Swift Horses is in theaters this weekend and I have reviewed the movie -- click on over to Pajiba and read my (mixed) thoughts! Less mixed are my thoughts on this sexy ass photoshoot of Elordi's co-star Diego Calva for Attitutde magazine, though -- these are getting the job done just the way I want the job done to me. Hit the jump if you'd like to see them all... 

Will Poulter Four Times

I guess today is all about the On Swift Horses boys! And why shouldn't it be? This morning we gave Jacob Elordi's bulge a spin and later on (ooh a preview of coming... attractions!) we'll have some Diego Calva to share. But right this minute let us toss ourselves onto Will Poulter's lap and give it a shake and a shimmy. Will was photographed for Interview Magazine, where he's interviewed by his Warfare co-star Kit Connor -- unfortunately the two of them don't discuss Kit grabbing Will's ass for all of us to enjoy; neither do they mention the shot of Will's incredible ass that's in On Swift Horses and which is one of the movie's greatest highlights. (Burned onto my brain, it is.) But then I don't mention Will's ass in my forthcoming Pajiba review of the movie either because hey -- we're professionals here! Except for here here, as in on MNPP, where I'll let my ass-ogling freak-flag fly freely. Thank goodness for safe (ass) spaces y'all. Hit the jump for the rest o' Will...

 

Warfare Boys Gone Wild

As you well know -- as you no doubt have scratched into your flesh with a shard of glass! -- I wasn't here on Friday. And so I wasn't able to post a link (from here anyway) to my review of Warfare, Alex Garland's new war movie starring a cast of a thousand hotties that included Charles Melton, Cosmo Jarvis, Will Poulter, Kit Connor, D'Pharaoh Woon-A-Tai, Joseph Quinn, Henrique Zaga, and our boy Noah Centineo seen above in yet another photo from his truly endless Behind the Blinds photoshoot. (See more here, and that post includes a link to three previous posts from the same shoot.) I also wasn't able to share...

... that video of Kit Connor and Charles Melton digging around in the backside of Will Poulter's trousers from the cast's ridiculously baity press run (which I did previously touch upon here) and that won't stand either. But I should definitely now link to my review, which you can read right here. Did any of you go see the movie this weekend? If so let me know in the comments if you agree or don't with what I had to say. If you don't agree it's okay! It's okay to be wrong! That said there are more Noah photos to share so let's get to that (PS if I had one wish -- sorry, orphans of the world! -- it would be to have Noah's perfect mop of hair) and hit the jump for those...

Will Poulter Eleven Times

As has been mentioned a couple of times this week already the next nine days or so will no doubt belong to the boys of Warfare photoshoot-wise, and today it seems to be Will Poulter's turn as Man About Town magazine has just dropped these pictures via their Instagram. Will looks hot (arms!), we love us some Will as you well know, but I gotta be honest and admit...

All the gays setting their alarms to go off for when Flaunt mag drops this photoshoot of Kit Connor proper

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— Jason Adams (@jamnpp.bsky.social) April 1, 2025 at 11:06 AM

... I'm getting kinda frustrated impatiently waiting for Flaunt magazine to drop their new and extremely sexy looking Kit Connor photoshoot, which lo-fi snaps of have leaked onto social media. Look at that shit! I keep checking basically every hour, for naught -- anyway stay tuned. Warfare is out until next Friday so one of these days we'll get it! For now enjoy Will after the jump...

Hug It Out For A Not Half Day

I was just about to tell y'all that it was going to be a half day here at MNPP because I thought I had a press screening of the upcoming queer flick On Swift Horses starring Jacob Elordi, Will Poulter, and Diego Calva to head to -- watch the trailer here -- but I fucked up my calendar and the screening was actually this morning! Damn damn damn. I am so daft. Anyway I'll probably be able to sneak into another press screening soon so it's not the absolute end of the world, but I was really looking forward to running free and gay for an afternoon -- sigh. Come comfort me with a hug and our pant-fronts pressed tightly together, Jacob Elordi. Anyway I am seeing Andrew Scott live on stage doing Vanya tonight thanks to a generous friend so at least I do have some proximity to gayness on tap -- I need my fix or I'll turn blue, I tells ya.

First Comes Peace, Then Comes Out

Well I hate to do it to y'all but I'm making like Will Poulter there and peacing out for the weekend -- leaving now for a screening and then I've got a big fun root canal happening tomorrow morning so I'm just taking off the entire day. Wheeeeeeee, that will surely be a blast -- I'll think I'll spend some time going through more movies etc. to list on eBay. Sort through the pain! Speaking of though if you missed my begging post yesterday about my neediness click here -- this looming dental work is a part of that that I didn't mention! But thanks to everybody who's been kind enough to donate already -- it means a lot to me. Moving on -- I haven't got any reviews hitting this weekend but I will say that if you feel like seeing that "Naomi Watts and a big dog" movie The Friend I recommend it -- I saw it at NYFF in the fall and it's surprisingly low-key and moving and Watts is wonderful in it. I know when you hear it's a movie about people dealing with big animals in small apartments you think you've immediately got the entire movie written in your head but I promise you The Friend will surprise you. It's a lovely little piece of work. 

Oh and since I brought up Will Poulter up top this is also a good moment to share the below clip from his new movie Death of a Unicorn (also out this weekend), which showcases a scene that was the movie's highlight for me. Which isn't to say that I didn't like the movie -- it's a lot of goofy fun (Teo Leoni and Richard E Grant are hilarious) if perrrrhaps a tad too long -- but rather that if you have now-era Will Poulter in nothing but a pair of soaking wet shorts getting out of a hot tub, then that's gonna be your movie's highlight for me. That's just math. Have a good weekend, everybody.

Pic of the Day

Having seen Death of a Unicorn last night I'm now back on my Will Poulter bullshit, real hard -- he spends a good majority of this movie wearing small shorts, and he has an excellent hot-tubbing scene as well! -- and so I wasn't going to resist sharing this photo of Will with Jacob Elordi on the set of their upcoming rainbow drama On Swift Horses. I mean I wasn't going to resist sharing this photo whether I'd just seen Will in soaking wet trunks in a new movie last night or not! Anyway if you missed the trailer it's right here and if you missed the new hot photos of the other dude in the movie -- one Diego Calva -- that I shared yesterday click here. On Swift Horses is out on April 25th! Not even a month to go!

Which is Hotter?

online polls

Apropos of nothing save I was currently thinking about Charles Melton after seeing the below batch of photos of him chilling with his Warfare co-stars and that led me to those two photos of him that I'd not seen before, a random poll for y'all! Who doesn't like taking a Melton break now and then?

Taylor John Smith seems to be the WARFARE actor with the Instagram worth following!

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— Jason Adams (@jamnpp.bsky.social) March 7, 2025 at 2:00 PM

Boys in Uniform

We've been keeping our eye on Alex Garland's upcoming war movie Warfare because its cast is a who's-who of do-me -- Noah Centineo and Kit Connor (seen above) plus Joseph Quinn, Henrique Zaga, Will Poulter, Cosmo Jarvis, Charles Melton, Finn Bennett, and several more young actors of note. But also Alex Garland's an interesting director and we look forward to his movies even when they don't star the line-up for our filthiest dreams. Anyway the film's out in about five weeks, landing on April 11th, and we've just landed our first look at it via the below video. Watch:

The film was co-directed and co-written by Iraq War veteran Ray Mendoza, who's telling the story of his own experiences, so expect a real immersive verite thing -- if you can call something as gorgeous looking as the footage contained in that clip "verite" anyway. The film was shot again by Garland's Civil War DP David J. Thompson, who made combat exquisite in that film --  looks like he'll be continuing that streak. In summation after the jump are four pictures of Noah Centineo at one of the Oscars after parties this past weekend because his hair looks so so pretty y'all (what, I get distracted easily)...

We Have Won the Jacob Elordi Jackpot

Forgot to mention this morning that today was going to be a quiet one because I had a funeral to go to this morning -- loving that 2025! -- but I'm back now, if a little bit day-drunk from the reception so forgive me any typos I miss. Anyway! Last week I told you that On Swift Horses the queer drama that promises to have Jacob Elordi and Babylon star Diego Calva going at it a bunch, has a release date of April 25th. Well lo and be beheld we now have a trailer like cockwork excuse me clockwork. (That typo was on purpose.)

The trailer very much knows what it is selling, and what it is selling is Jacob Elordi being hot and getting gay, and so it's rife with such imagery because we deserve our respites and distractions right now and somebody, bless them, knew that. Here is the trailer:

And after the jump a slew more gifs of note...

Jacob Elordi's Gay Spring

Deadline is reporting today that On Swift Horses, the movie that has Jacob Elordi and Babylon star Diego Calva falling hot and heavy for one another, has found itself a release date -- April 25th! I told you about this movie right here last fall before it played at TIFF -- I purposefully avoided everything that came out about the film (reviews etc) during that film festival because I am keeping myself pure as a virgin for my boys. Just this once. The film also stars Daisy Edgar-Jones and Will "Leather Daddy" Poulter and it was written and direced by Daniel Minahan who made the terrific 2001 movie Series 7: The Contenders, which I forgot existed until right this minute -- remember that movie??? I should see that one again! Now there's a movie that deserves a good boutique-label blu-ray or 4K upgrade stat. Minahan has worked on mostly TV stuff since then, including Game of Thrones and Fellow Travelers. Let's hope he carries those series' sexposition exploits up onto the big screen!

Today's Fanboy Delusion

 Today I'd rather be...

... Will Poulter's back-warmer bike bitch. 

Will Poulter's transformation into a sex god is now complete
with this Road Warrior fashion show saunter for the record books.

Pic of the Day

I have been so singlemindedly focused on the upcoming gay romance starring Paul Mescal and Josh O'Connor (for obvious reasons) that I totally forgot we also had a forthcoming gay romance (sort of) starring Jacob Elordi and Diego Calva! I have posted about the movie before right here -- it's called On Swift Horses and today Vanity Fair has given us the first look (seen above, although cropped to avoid their annoying logo) and a chat with everybody involved, check it right here. The film also stars Daisy Edgar-Jones and Will Poulter and honestly the description of the plot confounded me a little bit -- all that matters is this bit, I think:

"Elordi and Calva, who broke out in 2022’s Babylon, develop a steamy sexual chemistry that includes several rich, emotional, and explicit love scenes. “He’s a real cool customer,” Elordi says of Calva. “We had a week of intensive [prep] in the motel room, and [the director] gave us a lot of freedom to run around and to play and to find that love within those four walls.”"

This movie is premiering at TIFF so I guess we'll hear how steamy soon enough. Hopefully it's out in theaters before the end of the year. I don't like to wait for sexiness. 

Noah Is Going To War

I posted about Ex Machina (and this weekend's Civil War) director Alex Garland's next movie Warfare back in February when Charles Melton was cast in it, but since then there has been an onslaught of pretty young things cast in the movie and today's news that Noah Centineo is one of them finally tipped me into must-post-again territory. (As did stumbling upon these photos of Noah from 2019 which I don't believe I've ever seen much less posted before.) I didn't have a heap of info on the movie before but when Reservation Dogs actor D’Pharaoh Woon-A-Tai was cast this load of information was dropped:

"Woon-A-Tai will portray Ray Mendoza, sources close to production tell Deadline. Mendoza joined the Navy in 1997 and served for over 16 years as a Member of Seal Team 5 and a Land Warfare Training Detachment and BUD/s instructor. He was awarded a Silver Star “for conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity in action against the enemy while serving as Lead Communicator, Naval Special Warfare Task Unit-Ramadi, in direct support of Operation Iraqi Freedom on November 19, 2006,” according to Military Times.   

Warfare is the second collaboration for Garland and Mendoza, who served as the military supervisor for Garland’s latest film Civil War set for release on April 12. The pair wrote and will co-direct the film. Andrew Macdonald and Allon Reich of DNA and Peter Rice will produce. A24 will handle the global release of the film."

But back to the most important issue of this movie's hot cast -- besides Melton, Centineo, and Woon-A-Tai, the cast already has Cosmo Jarvis (our boy from Lady Macbeth and the currently airing Shogun series), Joseph Quinn (from Stranger Things and the future Johnny Storm), Kit Connor (the hottie from Heartbreaker), Will Poulter (he of the blown up MCU muscles), and Finn Bennett, last seen cleaning up blood in his tighty-whities on the most recent season of True Detective. 

Now that's a cast! And I've no doubt more will be cast -- so it goes with these military movies. War is good for one thing and that thing is hot casts of war movies. We'll obviously be keeping our eye on this one -- and stay tuned for our thoughts on Civil War, dropping soon-ish. Now hit the jump for two more of these vintage (is five years old "vintage"?) Noah snaps...