Good Morning, World

I have a gift for y'all to make up for my half-week absence this week -- I have gone and giffed adorable little twinkie Dylan Minnette's gratuitous shower scene in the latest Scream movie for you! (Here is my review of this movie, if you missed it. It is hitting blu-ray on April 5th -- pre-order the disc right here. If you want to feel old this morning -- and who doesn't, am I right -- how about this factoid for you: Dylan was born nine days after the original Scream movie came out. Yes, AFTER. Good grief. But yes that makes him 26 now so feel free to ogle -- unless you remember him too vividly as a little kid on Prison Break or Lost (he's been acting since he was about 8-years-old) -- I get it. I don't remember him on those though, so I feel free! I didn't take note of him until 13 Reasons Why much more recently, and even then I was surprised by how adorable I found him in 5cream. Hit the jump for the rest...

I Am Link

.

--- Killers Coming - We've finally got some information on the new season of David Fincher's serial killer series called Mindhunter thanks to Charlize Theron's big yap - Charlize, who executive produces the show, announced this week during Long Shot press that the show will return to Netflix this August. That link does a good job rounding up the serial killers we might see this time around, and it's a load of big names -- all the heavy hitters in true life psychopaths! It's like a sweeps episode of Will & Grace, just with Chuck Manson instead of Reese Witherspoon and/or Cher.

--- Time To Watch - The first teaser trailer for the forthcoming Watchmen series showed up yesterday, watch it right here. Well the first one with actual footage from the show; I believe that there've been a few brief videos setting forth the mood of the piece, which has been updated and altered from Alan Moore's original masterpiece of a comic by Lost and The Leftovers show-runner Damon Lindelof. Watchmen stars Jeremy Irons and Regina King and Yahya Abdul-Mateen II (aka Black Manta from Aquaman) and Don Johnson and on and on, it's a big cast. The action moves us into the future of the original story. No matter what though, I'm gonna miss Patrick Wilson's ass. (When isn't that true?) Watchmen premieres on HBO in the fall. 

--- His Song - I've gotten a wee bit overloaded on all of the Taron Egerton Rocketman interviews, so instead of making his new chat with THR its own post I'll just link to it here. (You can also see all of the photos from it on the Tumblr.) He does talk a bit about the gay stuff though, here's a choice bit:

"For me, kissing a man onscreen is no less appealing than kissing a woman onscreen. I'm not in any way repulsed by the male form. It's an uncomfortable thing regardless of who you're with — it makes no difference as to your sexual preference."

--- Man Witches - I keep forgetting that Robert Zemeckis is remaking The Witches with Anne Hathaway, but that is indeed a thing that is happening (and happening right now, it is right now filming) -- if you'd told me that a few years ago I'd have been excited about Zemeckis but annoyed about the remaking aspect (given that Nicolas Roeg's film is pretty much perfect) but that all is flipped around now; now I'm pretty fine with remakes (I've come to terms with them) but not so sure about Robert Zemeckis anymore, given the crap he's been churning out. That said the dark tone that adapting Roald Dahl demands leans towards the better version of Zemeckis -- this should in theory turn out more Death Becomes Her than The Polar Express. Anyway today's news is good news on the casting front -- the great Stanley Tucci and the great Chris Rock both just joined the thing, although no word on who they're playing.

--- Spidey Bros - Collider got to chat with Tom Holland on the forthcoming Spider-Man movie 9thx Mac), and of course they chat about Jake Gyllenhaal because who can look away from the two of them??? Certainly nobody around these parts anyway. Tom says again, for the hundredth time, just how bad he wanted to work with Jake -- oh me too, Tom, me too -- and how their vibe, or the vibe of their characters anyway, is like "big brother little brother." I've seen that movie. Four stars!

--- Laughing Gas - I am not going to watch this trailer myself -- horror movie trailers ruin the good scares way too often -- but if you'd like to see the trailer for the It sequel click your ass right on here and see it then. Chapter Two takes us into the future to the grown-up versions of the Losers Club, now played by Jessica Chastain and James McAvoy and Bill Hader and so forth, as Pennywise the world's friendliest and funniest clown returns to torment them. It's out in September.
.

Who Watches the Wolk, Man

.

I haven't been good about paying attention to HBO's forthcoming Watchmen adaptation from Lost and The Leftovers creator Damon Lindelof, but today's news that James Wolk has joined the already enormous cast (thx Mac) has grabbed my distracted head and smacked me about Cher-like. I am snapped out of it! Says Deadline:

"Set in an alternate history where “superheroes” are treated as outlaws, Watchmen embraces the nostalgia of the original groundbreaking graphic novel while attempting to break new ground of its own. As usual, the producers and HBO are keeping mum on the role but I hear Wolk plays a junior senator from Oklahoma. He joins the Watchmen cast that includes Regina King, Jeremy Irons, Don Johnson, Tim Blake Nelson, Louis Gossett Jr., Yahya Abdul-Mateen II, Andrew Howard, Tom Mison, Frances Fisher, Jacob Ming-Trent, Sara Vickers and Dylan Schombing."

It doesn't seem like this will interfere with Wolk's other show, Kevin Williamson's fleshy fantasy Tell Me a Story. Anyway I really have no understanding of how Lindelof is adapting Watchmen - are any of these people playing characters from the comics? They're not being clear about it. But if they want to paint Jimmy's dong blue and have him take up two-thirds of a three-way I sure wouldn't argue...

Good Morning, Adewale

.

What is it the kids are saying? Good morning to Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje and Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje alone? Yeah that. A happy 51st birthday to the British actor known as "Adebisi" on Oz and "Mr. Eko" on Lost and as "that dude who wanted to have sex with Kit Harington" in Pompeii and "that dude who showered with Jean-Claude Van Damme" in some movie.  (pic via)

.

Good Morning, World

.

A happy 50th birthday to Nestor Carbonell today, whose impossibly lush eyelashes we've enjoyed speculating about throughout the runs of Lost and Bates Motel. Were people asking questions about his eyelashes all the way back in the 90s when he was on Suddenly Susan (which is what these gifs are from)? Somebody go consult the microfiche and get back to us! Until then hit the jump for more of him doing some strange gay pool routine on that show...

Jin Goes To Hell

.

Jin & Sun were always my favorite characters on Lost and I've been irritable ever since the show ended... well, for one because of that ending (God what a terrible ending! Still not over it!) but also because Hollywood has not done right by Daniel Dae Kim & Yunjin Kim at all. So it is with some glee that I greet today's news that the former is in talks to take the role in Hellboy that Ed Skrein just recently bowed out of because he hadn't been aware it was an Asian character in the comics. This is good news! Now I can go back to loving all the casting decisions that director Neil Marshall's been making again, as Kim's set to join David Harbour and Milla Jovovich and Sasha Lane and Ian McShane, an underrated bunch indeed.

.

Who Will Watch The Watchmen

.

A lot of people hated Zack Snyder's 2009 film adaptation of Watchmen - I was not one of those people. It is admittedly goofy times infinity at times, and the quality of the performances are all over the map, but all things considered I find a lot to like about it. What is good - Jackie Earle Haley, Carla Gugino, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Patrick Wilson's Ass - is very good, and I've found the film immensely rewatchable; I always get caught up in it when it's on TV. Snyder's schtick may've grown wearisome over his subsequent projects but he was still a director worth watching as of this movie.

Anyway the news hit last night that Damon Lindelof, the man behind Lost and The Leftovers, has now gotten his hands on Alan Moore's superhero comic deconstruction, and he's turning it into a series for HBO. I am... of mixed emotions on this. I feel as if my emotions would be less mixed if the actual finale, the final hour, of The Leftovers hadn't been so gosh-darn good - I was not a fan of the show even though I inexplicably kept watching...

.

I found the majority of the past 2 seasons of The Leftovers insufferable but that was an absolutely lovely finale (Carrie Coon focus = win) pic.twitter.com/QWFo8DLppB

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) June 8, 2017

... I might've quit it after the wet fart of a second season but when they announced the third was their last I figured I'd suffer through. Again there were enough goods in the good column to make it worthwhile - Ann Dowd, Carrie Coon, Justin Theroux's Ass.

But I felt very little for most of the characters by the end - they'd become so enmeshed in silly mystery I couldn't even see who they were anymore. Which is the same fate that struck Lost. And so I wonder if Lindelof might again get so wrapped up in Quirk & Circumstance that he can't see Dr. Manhattan's big blue beating heart for his big blue swinging dick.

Although dream casting the series could be fun, too!

Who would you cast now as The Watchmen?

Endless Tribeca Finds Its End

.

My final review from Tribeca is up -- head on over to The Film Experience to read my thoughts on The Endless, the new movie from the filmmakers behind two well-liked recent horror offerings called Resolution and Spring. Out of those three... I liked Spring. I kind of don't get the love that Resolution got, and I definitely don't get the love that The Endless got via other's folks reviews at Tribeca. It just felt like a poorly acted, "somewhat clever every ten minutes or so" episode of Lost to me. (But read my review, I go into more depth over there.) That said they made a good trailer for the movie, using a single scene from the film, so you can watch that below and judge for thyself:

.

.

The Endless is one of the films that got picked up at the Fest and it is apparently getting an actual release of some kind in early 2018 (no idea why they'd hold off for an entire year but whatever) so stay tuned for that. Anyway I'll do a round-up of all my Tribeca reviews (and perhaps share a few thoughts on the movies I didn't get to review) soon so stay tuned for that.

.

Which Is Hotter?

.

.

The English Patient came out 20 years ago today!

.

Good Morning, World

.

I couldn't even remember if The Leftovers had been renewed for another year but here we have Justin Theroux posting shirtless pictures of himself on the set so, yup, I guess so. Personally I wasn't as enamored with the second season as a lot of critics seemed to be - I kinda felt like it went awfully far up its own arse - but there was still good stuff going on. Mostly the ladies, but I appreciated Justin's skin-willingness. And it appears that they're letting him have his beard next year, which is already going a long, long way to drawing me in. The third (and final) season of The Leftovers apparently begins airing on HBO this August -- are you excited?

Good Morning, World

.

Yeah we've all been there, Justin Theroux. (Or not. No I haven't. Whatever. Let's pretend I'm this edgy for this morning.) So who's watching The Leftovers? If the answer is yes, tell me what you're thinking about it in the comments please! I have mixed feelings towards it. It is... okay. Very good in spurts; super obnoxious in others. However I keep seeing people going nuts for it on the Twitter and I don't entirely get it. It's as confusing as.. well as waking up half-naked and handcuffed and alone. (But not really.) (Not really alone that is.) (It is that confusing.) (Or as confusing as all of these parentheses.) (Yeah that.)

Quote of the Day

.

"I can honestly look you in the eyes and say that I have been part of no dong-related conversations ever. Justin is the protector of his own manhood. And if he chooses to flaunt it, then I celebrate that. If he wants to be more discreet about it, then I embrace that as well. “I did not expect it to be a thing, and I have no intention of writing towards it this season.”

---  That's The Leftovers show-runner Damon Lindelof talking about, well, you know what he's talking about. (via, thanks Mac) And listen Lindelof, I just cleared several shows off my DVR in a pique of crap-fatigue, and I'm not so devoted to your show that I can't consider every comment of this sort a taunt, a dare. Best stay on my good side, and Justin's best side, and flop, flop, flop gently into that good night.

.

I Am Link

.

--- Mister Monsters - I showed The Strangers to a friend this week who'd never seen it and I was trying to figure out something to write on the movie since I hadn't seen it in awhile but let's be lazy and just share this good news instead - Scott Speedman is teaming up with director Brian Bertino again! They're making a movie called There Are Monsters which is about a mother and daughter terrorized by a you-guessed-it monster. I doubt that Speedman is playing the mother, the daughter, or the monster, but I guess we'll see.

--- Dead Down Dead - BD posted the opening scene from The Walking Dead spin-off Fear the Walking Dead (sidenote: I came up with a better title for this show on Twitter last night; I think I am going to call it that from now on) and you can watch it right here - the opening scene involves the character played by Frank Dillane stumbling around half-naked the entire time...

... and just cuz we're always thankful for abs, here are two fun-facts about him: Dillane is the son of Stephen Dillane, the terrific actor who most recently played Stannis on A Game of Thrones (and who we've posted naked pictures of because of course we have), and also Frank played Tom Riddle (aka Young Voldemort) in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. Anyway according to BD he steals the first episode away from everybody else, so we'll see.

.

--- Scare Ya Later - Yesterday I linked over to a list of "The Top 21 Horror Movies of the New Century" and as soon as I did I noticed that our beloved friend Final Girl had already taken on the list herself, with her own competing take on What Stacie Thinks Is Good. Some very fine additions to the pantheon here - I am always down with a Lake Mungo shout-out because hot damn is that movie scary and super underrated.

.

--- Lady America - Just because Mistress America has come out and I have already reviewed it doesn't mean I'm gonna stop talking about it, not when I adored it and implore all of you to go go go as soon as you can. So here, read this delightful chat with Greta Gerwig over at Details; loved this bit on how she works out dialogue in her scripts:

"I try and keep my earbuds out of my ears so that I can listen to people. The subway is great. There are people talking really loud about everything. Gynecology problems. Waxing, boyfriends, cancer, parents. Everything. I follow people. Someone said to me the difference between the NYC subway and, say, the Paris metro is that on the Paris metro, everybody is silent. They do not talk. In New York City, everybody is yelling their problems and it is so great for listening to things."

--- Sex Less - A bunch of my co-conspirators at The Film Experience have taken to talking the new season of Masters of Sex, read their thoughts over here. I think they say some very wise things about the stuff that's gone wonky this year. I still watch because I love all of the actors so very very much, but it does feel aimless this year.
.

--- Suit Yourself - The folks at Daredevil teased a look at the Daredevil suit for the second season on Twitter, see the tease here -- anyway if they really wanted to "tease" us they could have had a buck-naked Charlie Cox holding the folded-up suit over his junk. I mean really, it's like they're not even trying.
.

--- And Finally I am one of the folks that loathed the final season of Lost (especially the last episode) with a passion so hard it burned up all my use for even re-watching the earlier seasons that I very much liked, so when I tell you you should read this piece from Lost (and The Leftovers) show-runner Damon Lindelof talking about how obnoxious the online conversation gets around Game of Thrones then you should probably go read the piece. I co-sign pretty much everything he says. Choice laugh-my-ass-off-loud bit:

"When I see a blogger—thank God I’m not on Twitter anymore, because I get into all sorts of trouble—or a critic, or a recapper say, “I’m done with your show,” if I were running that show I would call them up and say, “You are not allowed to watch my show anymore. I’m going to f–king alert everybody in your life to watch you. I’m going to hire a private eye to tap your media consumption, and you better not ever watch it again. Are you sure you want to do this?"

.

Left Behind With Hotness

.

We've had a couple quick glimpses at the upcoming HBO series called The Leftovers from Lost's Damon Lindelof and Election author Tom Perrotta - it stars Justin Theroux and a cast of characters as the people who don't get raptured up to heaven (or at least that's the assumption - perhaps they just disappear) and the fall out from that. But now we've got a full on trailer, and you can consider my interests especially peaked. Turns out what everybody wants at what could be the end of the world is an orgy! I can sympathize.

.

.

Especially when it's Justin Theroux in a towel...

... and Chris Zylka without a shirt on...

 ... with a lot of man-on-man touching...

... and what might be Justin Theroux's butt...

(Those are his back tats, right? Honestly this is the kind of end of the world I would vote for if I had to vote for an end of the world, wouldn't you? Yeah yeah there's chaos and violence and stuff going on too, but so far the good's outweighing the bad here.

So Who's Going To Pompeii This Weekend?

.

I haven't bought tickets yet but I think I might still go see Pompeii this weekend anyway. Anybody else? Oh I'm sure it's terrible but I do love a disaster movie, and bonus I can pretend I'm doing research for when I actually go to the real Pompeii in a few weeks. And bonus bonus all that Kit and Adewale flesh on display.

As an aside, does anybody think that Adewale might be gay? Nothing comes up relationship-wise when I look around online, and then there are these pictures which are making my gaydar go kabluey...

I Am Link

.

--- Big Stuff - All sorts of superhero rumors today - apparently DC and Warner Brothers want to make a Justice League film simultaneously with the Batman Vs. Superman movie, so they can take advantage of having that big cast all together at once... otherwise known as being cheapskates. (Easy for me to say when I'm not the one about to shell out billions of bucks, I suppose.) Whatever, what do I care. And all of this involves Dwayne Johnson somehow. Oh and Lost's Josh Holloway may (or may not!) be playing Aquaman. Who the heck has thought of Josh Holloway lately? I forgot he existed.

--- Anty Matter - This one's not a rumor but honest to goodness confirmed truth - Michael Douglas is playing Hank Pym in Edgar Wright's Ant-Man movie. As I've admitted before I'm not all that familiar with the Ant-Man mythology and I'm trying to keep it that way so I can appreciate Wright's film from it's own place, but I guess Pym is like the Ant-Man mentor for Paul Rudd's younger Ant-Man, passing the baton or something. Let's just hope that Michael doesn't mince too much.

--- Shut Up - I really hope that Scorsese does indeed make his "Jesuit priests in Japan" movie called Silence next, because after The Wolf of Wall Street, which could be retitled Noise, I could use some silence from the director. Anyway if he does make the movie next as is rumored, besides Andrew Garfield who's been long attached it will now co-star Adam Driver.

--- Super Strange - Meanwhile back to superhero rumors, am I supposed to be excited that Marvel has maybe taken a meeting with Johnny Depp about playing Doctor Strange? Because I'm really at the point where I just want Johnny Depp and his nonsense to just go away. I'd prefer anybody. Chloe Moretz could play Doctor Strange and I'd be happier.
.

--- Shoot Em Up - I'd completely forgotten about this being a thing but here's Dominic Cooper talking about the World of Warcraft movie that Moon director Duncan Jones is set to make with him - specifically Dom's talking about how the script and how character and relationship-driven it is. He doesn't mention if he gets a shower scene like Sam Rockwell did in Moon, but I'm hoping that's just an oversight on his part.

--- Girl Time - My pal Sean has been advocating for cartoonist Phoebe Gluckner for years and years yet somehow I've never read any of her stuff - well now comes word that her graphic novel The Diary of a Teenage Girl is going to co-star Kristen Wiig and Alexander Skarsgard! Big time. I guess now I'll have to weasel my way into her work like the starfucker I am. I shoulda just listened to Sean way back when.

--- And finally, if you're in the mood for boundless sadness right now - and who isn't at the drop of a hat? - Alfred Hitchcock filmed a documentary on the concentration camps after World War II which got shelved until the mid-80s when it aired on PBS; well it's now popped up online. I guess this is actually being re-edited with new footage that they found and will be released into theaters later this year, but here's the earlier version.

.

.

Hot Buns The Bio-Pic

.

Y'all heard the word that True Blood is ending its run next season right? I'd say it's passed time and I'm hardly alone - hell everybody seems to think here nearing retrospect that it probably should've ended in the third season. But since that would have denied us Alexander Skarsgard's penis, no, nevermind, it's all been worth it, every shit minute we've suffered through. Anyway the show's driving force has Alan Ball, Oscar winning screenwriter for American Beauty, and he's now turning his eye towards other things... namely a bio-pic of the man who created The Chippendales. Yes, the strippers. I guess he was jealous watching Soderbergh have all that fun with Joe Manganiello on Magic Mike (as we all were, Alan. As we all were.)

Ball will write and direct the film, called I Am Chippendales, based on a book by Rodney Sheldon (which must not be out yet since I can't find proof of its existence anywhere else) about Somen "Steve" Banerjee, the creator of the male exotic dance troupe famed for their bow-ties and buns. (Ooh I wish they'd rename it Bow-Ties & Buns. Indeed I might have to call it that from now on.) You really should read Banerjee's Wiki page, by the way, the man's got an amazing story. Mud wrestling, cocaine, and murder, oh my! Fun fact: in the 2000 TV movie The Chippendales Murder he was played by Naveen Andrews! And hey that entire movie is on YouTube! Let's watch it together right now.
.


.

Mark Pellegrino Four Times

.

What is it about the sight of a man in suspenders stretching said suspenders out that I always find so hot? It always works. Remember this picture of Benjamin Bratt?

One of my all-time faves, that. Aaaanyway it's been a really long time since we last checked in on Lost's wayward brother Jacob - hey remember that big gratuitous post we did for him back in February of 2010? That was a good 'un. Mr. Pellegrino was just chucked onto my doorstep this afternoon by Twitch, who used his image in a wife-beater to goose my interests in their preview of movies playing in Toronto - he's in the "teen crime thriller" called We Gotta Get Out of This Place, which is the first movie on their list of fifteen festival titles. Here's that picture:

And here's another picture of him in some other movie or TV show in a wife-beater because why post just one when you can post two?
.

Exactly. 

.

Good Morning, World

.

Ack I am running behind this morning, so here... a behind! Maybe the best behind the silver screen's ever seen, in fact. Mr. Van Damme, take a bow. Somebody, drop the soap, we need a bow! Adewale! Drop it!

These are from the 1998 flick Legionnaire, and yes that's Lost's Mr. Eko aka Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje making Jean-Claude look like a wee little thing. It's funny, I watched the 1930 movie Morocco the other night, in which Gary Cooper plays a Legionnaire, and my boyfriend pointed out that there's something always really kinda gay about Legionnaries, and then here this is. 

Gay? What's gay about that? That's the least gay thing I have ever seen. (Granted, I have seen some gay shit in my time.) Just a bunch of bros getting their scrub on. Hit the jump for a few more shots.

I Am Link

.

--- Jolly Green Kate - I totally forgot that Lost's Evangaline Lilly was going to be in one of the Hobbit movies as an elf, but good god that's good casting. She is one elfin lady. That right there (via) is the first picture of her. She says her character has "a significant relationship with Legolas (Orlando Bloom)" but she won't say what sort of relationship. They're gonna fuck on a dragon, aren't they?

--- Lil Cabin - I'll always link over to a new-to-me behind-the-scenes picture from Sam Raimi's original Evil Dead, even if it's not the most exciting thing ever. It's The Evil Dead! it wins everything.

--- Never World - BD has a few new pictures from Insidious Chapter 2 up, including several looks into that netherworld called The Further where people wear lots of Ghost Make-up from discount stores and stand around in clouds of dry ice. 

--- Rock It Man -  HBO is teaming up with Martin Scorsese again, with Mick Jagger along for the ride, to make a series about the rock business in the 1970s, and it looks like Boardwalk Empire's Bobby Cannavale will star in it, probably.

--- Strumpets United - I almost went and saw the Bette Davis movie Jezebel when it screened at MoMA over the weekend; I've only seen pieces of it (I know) and my boyfriend loves it (big Bette fan, that one), but time slipped away. Glenn went and saw it though and wrote up some thoughts at Stale Popcorn, and things get positively Golden-Girls-a-licious up in there.

--- Bunny Nightmares - Also over at Stale Popcorn Glenn takes a look at the trailer for The Anna Nicole Story, the Lifetime Network movie biopic of the ill-fated reality-star Playboy bunny, which if you can believe it was directed by Mary Harron, the seriously talented auteur behind American Psycho and The Notorious Bettie Page. I haven't even been able to bring myself to watch the trailer. I am hoping against hope that Harron manages to sneak a good movie out of this, somehow.

--- Trauma Gold - Steven Spieberg and Daniel Day-Lewis might be reuniting for a movie about Iraq War veterans and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I smell Oscar number four! Spielberg's making that sniper movie with Bradley Cooper first though.

--- After After Earth - Over at The Film Experience Tim has been taking a look at What Happened To M Night Shyamalan (and Will Smith, as well) through the lens of this past weekend's epic flop After Earth. Here's Tim looking at it just before it opened amid all the bad reviews, and here's him taking on the aftermath. I am so happy this movie cratered, you guys - it restores my faith in humanity a smidge. 

.