By Bloody Glory

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Buffy and How To Get Away With Murder actor Charlie Weber -- see our previous posts on him here -- just 'grammed this photo from the set of HTGAWM, saying "a lot happens" on tonight's episode, and I don't watch that show but it looks like what he is saying might be true. Anyway that photo reminded me of a poll I did a couple of years back around Halloween time involving a whole bunch of hot guys slathered in karo syrup, and when I went looking for the post I found the poll service I'd used back then wasn't working any more. So I fixed it, and now you should go back and vote on that poll again. I promise you lots of sexy bloody hotness at the link will be your prize for clicking through.

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I Am Link

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--- We All Come At Night - I know that audiences are apparently all pissed off about the misleading commercials for It Comes at Night but... well I don't give a shit, I loved it. (Here's my review.) The disconnect between this sort of thing (meaning "other people" and "me people" has played out so often when it comes to slow arty horror movies at this point I am not moved by it. (Ever since general audiences gave Wolf Creek an "F" I have no time for them!) Anyway if you saw the movie tell me your thoughts and feelings, and in exchange I will link you over to this amusing bit of behind-the-scenes - Black Phillip, the already legendary goat from The Witch, makes a cameo!

--- Cherish Is The Word - Lisa Kudrow & The Comeback Crew (except for Robert Michael Morris, RIP) were at a TV festival in Austin several days ago and they didn't officially announce a third season of the show like I was hoping they would but Kudrow did tell the crowd that a third season is a distinct possibility. Even though the second season had a note perfect ending, I thought, I really do believe we'll see Valerie Cherish again - the character is still too ripe and rich for her not to. In related news I sure do miss Kellan Lutz' bare breasts. Make sure they tag along!

--- A Death Is a Wish Your Heart Makes - Did I somehow entirely miss the news that Eli Roth is remaking Death Wish - the brutal 1974 Charles Bronson revenge classic - with Bruce Willis? I checked and I never posted about it but the news doesn't seem entirely new...? I don't know. There's too much damn news and so much of it sounds the same. Eli Roth remaking Death Wish with Bruce Willis just seems about right. So anyway the movie has just been dated for November 22nd, so plan your Thanksgivings accordingly. (Whcih reminds me - where the hell is Eli's Thanksgiving slasher movie???) As an aisde I have never seen Death Wish. Should I?

--- The Red Woman - By now you have probably heard that Jessica Chastain is going to play the Big Bad in the next X-Men movie, which will revisit the previously mucked up tale of Dark Phoenix. Well technically Phoenix (aka Jean Grey aka Sansa from A Game of Thrones) is the Big Bad, but we're supposed to love her too much to feel that way and side against the people that want to stop her from blowing up all existence. Also good news - Fassbender is returning. I hope they do a decent job. I haven't read a ton of superhero comics but I read the Dark Phoenix saga and that shit is good.

--- Good N Scary - Our good friend Joe Reid made quite the marvel of a list of the Best Horror Movies of the 2010s over at Decider -- click on over and he'll tell you why they rock and where you can watch them all right this minute.

--- Everything Wonderful - I don't know about you but I'm sure not done thinking about and enjoying thinking about Wonder Woman, so here go forth and take in Nathaniel's list of 10 Best Moments in Patty Jenkins' already classic superhero movie over at The Film Experience. I mean if it was me making that list I would have found somewhere to stuff Chris Pine's junk, but then that's usually a concern of mine, even if we're not even talking about Wonder Woman specifically.

--- Speaking Of Super - I know everybody's hoping that Joss Whedon taking over Justice League after director Zack Snyder's personal tragedy (his daughter committed suicide recently) will mean big positive things for the movie since we've all been feeling a bit over Snyder's aesthetic for a bit, and I was right there with you, but I also sort of felt it might be too late to change the project much... but the news that Whedon just canned the old composer and has hired in his place Mr. Danny Elfman.. well, it means something? Elfman's music for the first two Batmans is iconic.... but Elfman's music for the past fifteen years give or take not so much. But hell, if he just reuses his old Batman music that would be fine. Do that.

--- And Finally a clip from the just about to start second season of Preacher has been released via EW, and from what I hear (I haven't had a chance to watch it yet) it involves some dick talk. Okay "circumcision talk" but when Dominic Cooper is in the room you'll have to excuse me for thinking about dicks, it like the thing in Six Degrees of Separation about elephants. Only with dicks.

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Keeping Up With The Kellan Lutzes

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I was just looking through Kellan Lutz's IMDb page (I don't just randomly do such things - he's turning 31 today) and wincing at some of the projects he's got lined up (look at the cast on this sucker, for instance) when I stumbled upon a movie called Money, which actually has an interesting cast... well OK it has a very attractive cast -- that's Kellan with Jesse Williams above (see a good Jesse post right here), and the film also stars BSG's Jamie Bamber.

(And yes it also has Jess Weixler, seen there second from the right, so phenomenal in Teeth.) That's a lot of hot man for one movie right there. Here's what the movie is about:

"Two wealthy businessmen are about to get away with $5 million in ill-gotten money until their plans are revealed by an uninvited house guest. "

Okay I want guesses - which of those two are the "wealthy businessmen" and which one is the "uninvited house guest"?  If the "uninvited house guest" is played by Jesse Williams then the movie suddenly becomes about race, at the very least tangentially, but that's my guess. Then again if this shot of Bamber on the set...

... is of him in character all of my assumptions go out the window. That is not a man to be trusted. Dry-humped upon, for sure - trusted, notsomuch. Anyway this movie seems like the most promising of Kellan's lot, so we wish him and this flick the best. And hey if nothing else Lisa Kudrow is probably out there figuring out a third season of The Comeback so Kellan should probably be buttering her up -- that episode where his character Chris tried to sleep with Valerie was a real highlight of the second season.

In summation here, let's judge these old gratuitous

modeling pictures of Kellan, cuz why not:

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Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... climbing Mt. Momoa.

"I'm gonna blow!!!" should be what we're all thinking looking at these pictures of Jason via the photographer Patrik Giardino's website (thanks to Sean for the heads-up) -- I've seen some of these before (he shoots for Men's Health) but some are new and old or new they are all hot. The Hotness Certainty! It's math.

Giardino's site is a treasure trove of shimmering celebrity beefcake -- Hugh Jackman, Joe Manganiello, Taylor Kitsch, Kit Harington...

... and on and on; if you're anything like me you'll probably fall into the rabbit hole and not surface for hours. (By the way click these to emibbgen a bunch.) And after the jump I've got a select assorted assortment to share...

Tarsem Is Immortal

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It's the director Tarsem Singh's 54th birthday today and yes indeed he's made some great flicks like The Cell and The Fall but any excuse we can find to talk about his 2011 flick Immortals we're gonna take, because good goddamn...

... it's plain to see. How about those costumes by Eiko Ishioka, huh? Or lack there of. The perfect lack there of. Henry wears the lack of a costume well, as usual! But since injecting prime Henry Cavill into the competition's not fair to anybody we'll just put those pictures there above and move on to comparing a different pair of the film's many man-gods...

Who wore it best?

Kellan Lutz

Luke Evans

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In summation, more Henry Cavill just cuz:

Which is Hotter?

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Somehow I know people on Facebook (or you know, I "know" people on Facebook) that went to Kellan Lutz's 30th birthday party over the weekend, and granted the people I "know" who were there are gay but man it seemed from pictures like Kellan Lutz's birthday party was the gayest thing this side of a champagne brunch at Liberace's. And that picture above (via), of Kellan with his manager Ryan Daly... well it's only aiding and abetting my former impression.

Which is hotter?

Ryan Daly

Kellan Lutz

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Kellan Lutz Could Play Dumbo

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We know he's got the trunk for it. (pic via)

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Who Wore It Best?

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online surveys

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This post has been brought to you by

 Adam Levine's "Animals" video:

And this scene from Hemlock Grove  (thanks Jason):

And this shot of Charlie Hunnam on Sons of Anarchy:

And this shot of Paul Bettany:

And that Being Human show, both editions:

Good luck with the clean up tomorrow,
and Happy Halloween!

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Good Morning, World

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Kellan, why so pensive? So lost in, dare I say it, thought? Are you angry that the third Expendables leaked online? Did Jason Statham break a promise? Do not be sad, Kellan Lutz. You are, after all, Kellan Lutz. Yes, that is your hand, and yes those, those are your biceps, inhumanly ballooned. All is well again. (The rest of us can hit the jump for a couple more pictures, leaving him to sort out whatever existential queries that're very nearly putting an expression on his face.)

Soccer Brings The Beefcake Together

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Sung to the tune of Madonna's "Music," naturally. (via)

I Am Link

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--- Psych Out - While spoilery this chat with Caroline Dhavernas on her character's fate on Hannibal isn't the right kind of spoilery - I wanna know what's her fate fate, dammit! She can't be... you know! Christ this is impossible to talk about without spoilers, I give up. She also talks about having to lay in the rain for hours, which sounds awful. Shame on you all for tormenting my beloved Caroline! (thanks Mac)

--- Robot Go Boom - I don't know why anybody's bothering to ask the folks that made the Transformers movies their opinions on anything, much less film criticism - they should be asked maybe how to write a sentence from start to finish first, see if we can get them over that hurdle, then we'll move on to global politics or something.

--- Young Hunks - Liam Hemsworth is facing off against his Hunger Games co-star Woody Harrelson in an upcoming Western called By Way of Helena. (Anybody else think the name "Helena" should be retired from movie titles thanks to Boxing Helena? just me? Okay then.) Liam's playing a Texas Ranger who heads to a small-town enjoying a murder-spree, while Woody's the local religious whack-job.

--- The Dreyfus Affair - Roman Polanski is maybe going to make his next movie - a bio-pic of Alfred Dreyfus, a French officer falsely accused of espionage in the 19th Century - in Poland, as long as he can get them to guarantee, like sign pieces of paper three times and underline it, that the country won't ship him off to America to face his past. This would be his biggest movie in awhile, costing forty million bucks or thereabouts, and they say it will involve big-name actors. Be interesting to see who'll sign up at this point.

--- Bug Crush - That creepy guy in Prisoners that managed to out-creep Paul Dano (no small feat) has just joined Ant-Man - the actor's name is David Dastmalchian and Marvel's not telling anybody what role he's playing. I think it might perhaps be... creepy? Just a hunch.

--- Bigger And Better - I've only read pieces of it so far but this list of the top fifty blockbusters of all-time at The Dissolve is, as usual with those guys at that site, a really wonderful thing to spend a lot of your time reading. They do great work at that site, I really should link to them more often. (As if they need my help.)

--- Trek Or Treat - I actually think that casting Kellan Lutz as a young William Shatner is kinda fantastic - they've totally got similar stuff going on. I can see it. The movie is from the guy who made the Ethan Hawke version of Hamlet, and stars Peter Sarsgaard and Winona Ryder as those scientists who did the famous electric shock experiments in the 60s. William Shatner played the male scientist in a TV movie in the 70s, which is where he comes in. Meta.

--- Investigator Gadget - Sherlock is back! That is, it's coming back, eventually - they are going to shoot a one-off special in January, and then they'll shoot another three-episode season later next year. It's always a big deal that they can get busy busy bees Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman's schedules to line up at all.

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It's A Room & Bored Reunion Show

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The most important bit of news here we'll hit first, since it's the reason we're here at all - we've got confirmation that Kellan Lutz and Malin Akerman are going to be back as Chris and "Baby Girl" Juna on the six new episodes of The Comeback, which is being filmed right now. (Did you see this picture from behind-the-scenes? Ahhh!!!) That's the news.

The bonus on top of that news is when I went looking for a picture of Kellan and/or Malin (yeah right as if I even looked for pictures of Malin let's be serious) to accompany this news I found these pictures from some Expendables red-carpet thing of Kellan and Jason Statham tag-team-molesting a dude. (I think that is boxer-turned-actor Victor Ortiz?)

And now my brain is broken.
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Come Back To The Comeback, Comeback

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I can hardly believe that this news is really real - I've spent so long wishing it to be really real, and now that it is (really real, that is) it feels really surreal. E!News has the first batch of details on what's what with the return of The Comeback (thanks Mac). Aunt Sassy & Co will start shooting the episodes in about three weeks, on May 19th. The writers have already been at work on it for a bit. It will be a six-episode series, front to back, but if it does well HBO's open to more. (SO WE WILL MAKE IT DO WELL, WON"T WE???) 

They also confirm that Malin Akerman and Kellan Lutz will both be returning for at least some of it. I'm excited about those guys, to be sure ("Baby Girl" is wonderful, and Kellan's nipples are always welcome) but there are more important names we need to be hearing here. Like Robert Michael Morris as Mickey! Laura Silverman as Jane! Lance Barber and Robert Bagnell as Paulie G and Tom! And of course Damian Young as her strangely sexy husband Mark. Remember Marky Mark's butt? I sure do.

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... the monkey on Kellan Lutz's back. (via)

We All Liked Lookin' At Them There

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I kind of feel like a dickhead for wishing Kellan into straight-to-video-ish obscurity so early in his career but if he can have the, uh, ample and, uh, bountiful career that Jean-Claude Van Damme, um, bounced around in for us, then I say we all should consider ourselves lucky. That Java Heat movie he put it in the air for was already a step straight in that blessed direction, and lord knows that Hercules thing wasn't doing him any favors in the upwards mobility department. Embrace the exploitative B-movies, darlin'.

This strange set of pictures via JJ is from a trip Kellan took to Thailand to christen a new resort there with his presence - why does that whole sentence read sketchy as hell to me? It's like... I don't know what you're good at, Kellan, but if it's at the Cheetah it ain't dancin'. We take the cash... 

... we cash the check, we show 'em what they wanna see. Speaking of what we all wanna see, hit the jump for a few more pictures including some shots from that Hercules movie that missed me the first time past (doesn't it look like Liam McIntyre is grabbing his ass in the picture on the left here?)...