Row Row Row Your Boys

George Clooney's latest homoerotic fantasia The Boys in the Boat has gifted us with a trailer today -- this is his movie about the rowing team at the Nazi Olympics yada yada that stars Callum Turner (mmm Callum Turner) and Joel Edgerton and James Wolk and a bunch of other hot pieces crammed into tank tops and shorts and ...

... getting all wet and sweaty with one another. Sports! Am I right? I shared a pile of photos from the set of this movie back when it was filming that were worth a few shakes of the leg but this trailer proves that there's nothing like a golden-boy filter thrown on the camera lens to make the homoeroticism truly sing!

This movie is out on Christmas Day, so I suppose a lot of you people should be preparing yourselves to be shifting around uncomfortably in the seat next to your parents as you discover fresh new and exciting feelings about the wonders of rowing. Here is the trailer:

And I made several more gifs for us, after the jump...

Good Morning, James Wolk

Happy 38 to James Wolk today! I feel like I've barely seen him in ages! Since the skimpy panties in Watchmen, really? I never watched Zoo and that is my bad, because by the sound of it that nutty show was right up my alley and if people like me weren't turning in for it then no wonder it's not still on. Anyway we should be seeing some of James this year, as he's one of the (many many many) hot men starring in George Clooney's next directorial effort, The Boys in the Boat, about the rowing crew team in the 1936 Olympic games in Berlin. This movie is looking like it might be the gayest thing Clooney's ever done...

... and we all know how much that is saying with regards to the man who wore rubber nipples for Joel Schumacher. But in all seriousness it really does look like it might even rival Clooney's Catch-22 miniseries for young men in skimpy clothing -- just look at the set photos I posted last June! To say I'm looking forward to this is an understatement -- I think Clooney is generally a very bad director, but he's at his best when there are half-naked men in front of him. (Catch-22 is by far the best thing he's done, with that "Let's leer at Sam Rockwell's perfect ass" epic Confessions of a Dangerous Mind coming in second.) Let's hope he fully, similarly appreciates James when he's got him there. 

Pics of the Day

Don't know how I managed to miss these photos from the set of George Clooney's upcoming movie The Boys in the Boat, which is about the University of Washington's rowing team in the 1930s working their way to the big 1936 Berlin Olympics (via) -- this one was on my radar immediately because the last time Clooney gathered up a bunch of hot boys for war stuff we got the hyper-gratuitous antics of his Catch-22 miniseries with Christopher Abbott. You add sports to the mix and you cast people like Callum Turner and like Joel Edgerton and like James Wolk and you set it during the height of inadvertently queer (thank you J.C. Leyendecker) "Arrow Man" fashion...

... and you've got a fetish parade right up my alley. Probably yours 

as well! Hell it's clearly George Clooney's best life...

Has anyone ever looked more in their element?

And yes George, I am just jealous. With good reason. 

You can see all the good reasons right on after the jump...

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

For a Good Time, Call... (2012)

Charlie: The most exciting part of the sex that we 

just had was when my penis chafed by your NuvaRing.

Oh my lord did anybody else forget this movie existed? I had totally forgotten this movie existed. Remember when we almost got Ari Graynor as a thing? I wish we would have, she is so funny and talented but Hollywood just didn't seem to know what to do with her. She hasn't stopped working -- she was terrific on Mrs. America just last year -- but I want to see her more. But speaking of people that Hollywood hasn't figured out what to do with -- we're here today not for Ari, but because it's James Wolk's birthday! 

As much as I forgot this movie existed I forgot even more that James Wolk was in it -- and shirtless to boot! I think he's only in the opening scene seen having sex with and summarily breaking up with the not-Ari other lead character (played by co-writer Lauren Miller Rogen) but what a scene. The movie is on HBO Max or rentable on Amazon if you wanna see it again or for the first time -- when I did my capsule review at the time I called it "totally charming.. totally a Pink Box Movie and unashamed of that fact." I'm adding it to my list for another go, here on the (good grief) almost 10-year anniversary. 

Anyway happy birthday, James! I hope your role in George Clooney's upcoming Olympic Rowing Team movie (is there any point side-eyeing George Clooney about this shit anymore?) The Boys in the Boat (previously spoken about here) is a good one, and I don't just mean that you show off those famous gams. (I do mean that though, in part.) Hit the jump for some gifs from FAGTC (that abbreviation!) that I made of James after the jump...

Which is Hotter?

This afternoon let us wish one of our favorite furry pretend-boyfriends James Wolk a happy 36th birthday -- I feel like I haven't seen Jimmy in ages! I feel like I haven't seen him since he stripped down to his weird black panties on Watchmen? And my feelings are correct, checking his IMDb -- I guess he's been busy doing shirtless push-ups and dancing-while-inhumanly-sexy with his little ones... oh and there was that pandemic thing, remember that?

There is the pilot of a show listed on his IMDb called Ordinary Joe that has him playing the lead role (yes, of "Joe") that sounds very Sliding Doors; enticingly it co-stars openly gay cutie-pie Charlie Barnett, who you should recognize from Russian Doll and the last Tales of the City series. We'll see if that amounts to anything! For now let's have ourselves a goofy lunchtime James Wolk poll...

free polls

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... rearranging Dr. Manhattan's atoms. (via)

The only thing better than this set selfie of Yahya Abdul-Mateen shooting Watchmen would be if his co-star James Wolk was sitting on his lap wearing his little villain panties. 

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Sterling! Cooper! Draper! Pryce!

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I apparently finished binge-watching Mad Men exactly one month ago, on May 31st -- it was my first time watching the show (or about 98% of the show anyway, I'd seen a couple stray episodes here and there over the years) and it was, to put it mildly, a treat. I loved every second of it. I linked to this when I was still in the middle of it but here's the Twitter thread I kept as I did the entire series:

I'm watching the first episode of Mad Men -- a show I have never watched (I know, I know) -- and I'm surprised at how young Jon Hamm already looks (compared to today I mean) pic.twitter.com/JpiJJ10FG8

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) May 15, 2020

Like I said it's been one month since I finished watching all seven seasons, ninety-two episodes, of the series, which I plowed through over the span of just about two weeks -- it was a lot! But somehow as soon as I was done my first thought was still I WOULD TOTALLY DO THAT AGAIN. For real! I would! The thing was I binged the show because Netflix was taking all of the episodes off of their platform in early June -- I only had enough time for the one viewing.

pic.twitter.com/ZcmHPmWkgy

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) May 29, 2020

Well color me Peggy because Amazon has just announced they've snapped up the rights for their Prime streaming service, and they're all dropping for free on there on July 15th -- my birthday! A gift to me from the Weiner Gods above, halle-fuckin-lujah!

This episode's a hoot pic.twitter.com/TDoXuVtyPz

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) May 29, 2020

I Wanna Watchmen Again

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Although it is admittedly a fictional entertainment and therefore should not be granted the weight of these real-world counterparts HBO's beautifully-done Watchmen series (starring among other Yahya Abdul-Mateen, pictured here) is hitting blu-ray tomorrow and the timing on this probably couldn't be better -- yesterday was the 99th anniversary of the Tulsa Race Massacre which it shone a light on, and then there's, you know, everything... else. Everything else happening in the world, in this country, right now. I'm not telling you it's a good replacement for getting actively involved in your communities right now -- here is a list of bail funds around the country that you can donate to right this second for one -- but for the in-between times I do think Watchmen turned out to be shockingly smart on the subject of the fucked-up race relations in this country and so if you missed it when it aired now would be a good time to give it a shot. You might learn something, you might see James Wolk strip his clothes off to reveal some ridiculous underpants -- why not both? On that note I've got more shots of Yahya for us after the jump as inspiration...
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Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... straddling James Wolk's shoulders. (via)

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... quarantined with Daddy Wolk.

(via) I'm not sure if it was actually Jonathan Tucker who started the "Push-up Challenge" that has been going around social media this week but his was the first instance of it that I saw (see some gifs here) and either way, bless him and bless James Wolk here for taking it that extra mile o' oomph. Fuck celebs singing inspirational songs -- get your damn titties out for a good cause. (In this instance "my quarantine entertainment" is the good cause in question.)

Who Wore It Best?

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Did you see our big "James Wolk in Watchmen" post yesterday? You need to see that. Especially since this post now won't make sense without it. Anyway a couple of you made the excellent point that the "stupid panties" (as Laurie so eloquently put it) that Wolk's character rocked -- and yes comic book fanboys I know they were a nod to the ones seen in the Alan Moore's original Watchmen book...

... I am a nerd too thank you very much -- looked an awful lot similar to the metallic high-risers that Sting sauntered about in in David Lynch's Dune. Which hey yes they do! Which is something I weirdly never noticed before -- I mean, Lynch's film came out in 1984, before Moore's comic did two years later... do we think it's possible it was a reference? I just always thought of the Doctor's choice in vertiginous briefs as a Charlie Brown squiggle myself. 

Anyway now that I have given you

 so very much to mull over, our poll:

survey hosting

Who Wolks the Watchmen

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I Wolk the Watchmen, that's who! A couple of days late, at least. I had to watch the finale episode of Damon Lindelof's masterful HBO series a day late, and so I'm only posting these... these gifs... here today. Be grateful I'm posting them now -- I considered making this tomorrow's "Good Morning" post but it seemed cruel to delay these bounteous gifts o' gifs any longer. Even though...

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MAKING THESE GIFS WILL BE THE DEATH OF ME pic.twitter.com/REcGHbTmXp

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) December 17, 2019

.

... I was worried they'd be the death of me. And I am fairly certain I didn't breathe the entire hour and a half they took to make. But who needs oxygen when...

... such other wonders exist in the world. Oxygen is overrated! I'd ask y'all what you thought about the finale of Watchmen but I feel like none of us are thinking about that right now. But I do want to share this bit of a Vanity Fair interview with our boy Jimmy about the filming of this scene, before we just gif ourselves blind...

"I think when I saw the Speedo in my trailer, there was a moment of, ‘This is going to be a very revealing scene.’ But in the moment, I didn’t even think twice about it,” Wolk says. “I felt very empowered by it, which is preposterous. Luckily something took over and I wasn’t thinking of myself as myself.” Wolk says he can’t remember whether the original script called for him to be totally nude or partially covered—but, he says, “I was really grateful when I showed up in my trailer and costumes was like, ‘We have this black Speedo.’”

Delivering a right-wing tirade (“First he took our guns, and then he made us say sorry”) while daintily removing his clothes for multiple takes might seem daunting, but Wolk says having something to do while talking actually made the performance flow more seamlessly. “Undressing and disrobing in all of my glory is what Keene would feel too. It grounded me in the character,” Wolk said. There was one sticking point, though: “Taking off cowboy boots was hard as shit,” he admits."

"In all of my glory." I sure can't say it better than that. 

Hit the jump for James Wolk, in all of his glory...

Good Morning, World

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I said this the last time somebody got naked on Kevin Williamson's tale o' fairies Tell Me a Story - that would be James Wolk's last shower scene - but I've fallen behind on the show, and it's only gotten worse. I'm two full episodes in the red now. And yet somehow I'm fully informed of Billy Magnussen showing his bounteous ass (in front of piles of books, no less!) so are we really missing anything? I don't know that I am. Hit the jump for the rest...

Good Morning, World

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Well we're two episodes in to Tell Me a Story, has anybody formed any opinions yet? As long as they keep putting James Wolk in his shower every episode (see previous) there's no way I'll stop watching, and this here is clearly the scene James talked about before where he...

... was forced to lean whilst nude on a big burly camera-man, which is nice to think about. That said I kind of think (I'm sorry, Kevin Williamson) that this show is just awful so far. I never watched The Vampire Diaries though - is this what that was? Anyway I have no idea what they're going for, and the direction and the acting... dear me, the acting. Excruciating, stiff stuff. But we're still early...? I guess? I don't know. James Wolk is in the shower. Let's focus on the good stuff. Hit the jump for the good stuff...

Who Watches the Wolk, Man

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I haven't been good about paying attention to HBO's forthcoming Watchmen adaptation from Lost and The Leftovers creator Damon Lindelof, but today's news that James Wolk has joined the already enormous cast (thx Mac) has grabbed my distracted head and smacked me about Cher-like. I am snapped out of it! Says Deadline:

"Set in an alternate history where “superheroes” are treated as outlaws, Watchmen embraces the nostalgia of the original groundbreaking graphic novel while attempting to break new ground of its own. As usual, the producers and HBO are keeping mum on the role but I hear Wolk plays a junior senator from Oklahoma. He joins the Watchmen cast that includes Regina King, Jeremy Irons, Don Johnson, Tim Blake Nelson, Louis Gossett Jr., Yahya Abdul-Mateen II, Andrew Howard, Tom Mison, Frances Fisher, Jacob Ming-Trent, Sara Vickers and Dylan Schombing."

It doesn't seem like this will interfere with Wolk's other show, Kevin Williamson's fleshy fantasy Tell Me a Story. Anyway I really have no understanding of how Lindelof is adapting Watchmen - are any of these people playing characters from the comics? They're not being clear about it. But if they want to paint Jimmy's dong blue and have him take up two-thirds of a three-way I sure wouldn't argue...

Good Morning, Wolk & Friends

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Rise and shine, kiddos! Did everybody do like I told them to and watch the now-streaming premiere of Kevin Williamson's Tell Me a Story on CBS All Access last night? Because if you did you got, uh, a treat. Several treats, actually!

No tricks. Just treats. I'm pretty sure every single actor on the show, including James Wolk, Billy Magnussen, Davi Santos, Luke Guldan, and Paul Wesley, all took their clothes off. And as for Wolk (good god let us never stop) he finally...

... really took some clothes off! Really really! It's a Halloween Miracle! And the above gif is actually trimmed short - to see the rest (and you wanna see the rest believe me, there's literally dozens of gifs) you've got to come with us after the jump...

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... getting steamy with James Wolk.

I totally forgot that Kevin Williamson's new dark fairy tale show Tell Me a Story premieres today on that CBS All Access thing! You can apparently watch James Wolk and Billy Magnussen and Paul Wesley and all them fellas (see also Kim Cattrall) getting their fairy on right this minute. (Here's the show's trailer if you missed it.) Well now I know how I'm spending some of my All Hallows...

Tell Me That Story Again, James Wolk

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"I was somewhat nude, and it was a shower scene. I was wearing privacy briefs and all that, but it’s supposed to look like I was in the shower. But in the show, they couldn’t fit the camera in the shower and the wall in the shower. But they needed me to lean against the wall in the shower and, you know, scream and cry — as you do every time you shower! So, they’re like, ‘Okay, we came up with this idea. We’re going to leave the camera in there, and we’re just going to have the cameraman put his hands out, and then you just hold his hands like they’re the wall. So now I’m in a privacy brief, holding this grown man’s hands, screaming and crying!”

-- Thanks to the like eight people who sent me
the link to this story told by James Wolk at NYCC 

about the filming of Tell Me a Story! (via)

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It's official, the #TellMeAStory press tour is going to be the death of me pic.twitter.com/682V5ZZKX3

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) October 5, 2018

Good Morning, World

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You know how the legend goes that it was the death of Judy Garland that was the proverbial straw that broke Dorothy's back with regards to the Gay Rights Movement? Well I feel like if they don't show James Wolk's bare butt in Tell Me a Story I'm gonna be throwing some bricks - maybe James Wolk's Bare Butt (or the lack thereof) can be the start of a new age of civil disobedience? Whatever it takes! Oh by the way here's the trailer for Tell Me a Story, Kevin Williamson's new series (previous posts here) starring Wolk and Billy Magnussen and Kim Catrall and Paul Wesley and so forth...

.

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I'm just guessing off of the images we see in there but I feel like this series might at least be in part a dream that Billy Magnussen is having? Every moment we see of Billy involves him in really different seeming lighting and a bedroom. I might be thinking about this too much, I might be totally off base, but given the story is being sold as "a modern twist on fairy tales" that would be a very Alice in Wonderland thing to do, and I giggle at the thought of Billy Magnussen as our Alice.

Oh and this trailer involves probably my favorite edit of all time...

A male stripper's thrusting crotch cutting directly 

to James Wolk's face? Don't mind if I do! Thanks, show!
Tell Me a Story premieres on Halloween!