Gray Skies Are Gonna Clear Up...

... put on a happy face. 

Even if it's not your own!

Hold Me Thrill Me Kiss Me Kill Me, Mr. Storrie

Much to many of your no doubt chagrins Heated Rivalry breakout Connor Storrie has been booking roles left right and V-shaped center -- for one I believe he's already filmed his role in Beef and Shiva Baby actress Molly Gordon's upcoming comedy Peaked opposite Gordon and Emma Mackey and Laura Dern and Amy Sedaris and lots of people (it's a comedy about a high school reunion), which sounds right up my alley since every name I just listed off is heaven. But we're not here now for Peaked -- we're here because Deadline is reporting that his next movie might be a thriller called Turpentine from  Compliance director slash The Penguin showrunner Craig Zobel, which already has Melissa McCarthy circling. Those two in a thriller already has me pre-thrilled! The plot, described as "following a deadbeat son who hires friends to rob his own parents to pay off a bookie with disastrous results", sounds pretty Fargo-ish to me, but Zobel makes me think it will be played straighter than the Coens did similar ingredients. But it'll be good to see McCarthy do another serious role -- I wouldn't be angry if this was just The Deep End but with Meliessa McCarthy playing the Tilda role! Although if they wanna go goofier maybe she could play her character like an older version of that roommate from Go! So many possibilities. 

Jerri Blank's One Busy Bee

This news really hits home -- one of the first movies my boyfriend made me watch in our relationship, many many a moon ago, was Roger Corman's The Wasp Woman, a favorite of his since he was a kid. The 1959 film is lo-fi camp brilliance, telling the story of a high-powered cosmetics executive (played by actress Susan Cabot, whose tragic life almost got made into its own movie awhile back) whose youth-rejuvenating Royal Jelly concoction turns her into the titular stinging nightmare. Which the film visualizes like this:

It's incredible. Go watch the movie right now if you've never seen it -- I guarantee a good time will be had. Anyway news has broken today that one of our (me and my boyfriend, that is) heroes, Amy Sedaris, is remaking the movie with her Strangers With Candy partner Paul Dinello as director. Before writing this post I forwarded this information to my boyfriend and his reply was, "I might cry." Which is the exact correct response. Anyway production is slated to begin on the film next summer -- that's all we know for now but do stay tuned for every whisper of news as I'll be all over this like a wasp woman hopping on any supermodel half her age. 

Pics of the Day

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A post shared by Jason Adams (@jasonaadams)

On Thursday I was fortunate enough to attend the 20th anniversary screening of the film version of Strangers With Candy (which is finally getting a new physical media release soon, they told us!) at the IFC Center here in New York, and above are a few photos and one video from the Q&A that followed with Amy Sedaris, Stephen Colbert, and Paul Dinello -- a Q&A that was moderated by Cole Escola no less! Cole of course co-starred with Amy on the brilliant three seasons of the far-too-hard-to-now-find series At Home with Amy Sedaris. Anyway in the video I shared Sedaris brings up a sequel idea that would see our queen Jerri Blank now attending college, and it looks like I have a new impossible thing to pin all of my hopes and dreams upon y'all! Cole could bring their At Home character of Chassie along for the ride -- have her be a mean sorority sister who torments Jerri. I MUST HAVE IT.

Good Morning, World

Happy 50 to Justin Theroux today! Yes, Justin Theroux is what 50 looks like now, so you'd best get your chickens in a line or whatever. Before the roosters come home to hatch! I think I have got my aphorisms screwed sideways -- like Justin there I appear to need some caffeine. Anyway check our Archives for more thorough Theroux coverage -- for this morning I ask ye: What's your favorite Justin Theroux performance? I imagine a lot of you will say The Leftovers, but not me! Mine is by far, by miles...

... the Sea Captain on At Home With Amy Sedaris. Duh.

Admitting she's cut the anti-vaxxers out of her life is still the best thing Jennifer Aniston has done this month, but gifting us with this photo of Justin Theroux on his birthday is now a close second pic.twitter.com/D38UMFxNuw

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) August 10, 2021

Pedro Pascal Two Times

Sweater porn! Sweater porn! Loves me some sweater porn, and Pedro's not so bad himself either. I feel bad that I hated the fucking guts out of the first season of The Mandalorian because I do like Pedro and I would like to watch him in something. (I mean if a home-made porn with his BFF Oscar Isaac isn't available, anyway.) So I ask you people -- what are you thinking of the second season? Even if you're incorrect and thought the first season was better than a pile of shit, I will ask you, because I am open-hearted and generous, quite like an actual saint.

Quote of the Day

"... I’m a Halloween person, which is odd to me because I’m terrified of scary things. I can’t watch scary movies or even a scary movie trailer. But I love the aesthetic of Halloween more than most holidays. We’re not talking about Christmas, of course—let’s put Christmas aside. Anything that gets Halloweenified in orange and black, or has an occasional bat or ghost or monster, really does it for me. But just to be clear, I’m not interested in terror. I’m interested in a delightful monster or witch. I don’t care for jump scares. Don’t scare me or I will definitely punch you in the face."

Blessings unto us all, I needed some smiles this Friday and Interview Magazine has gifted us with one of their "25 Questions" features with Maya Rudolph! They work like this: 25 of Maya's famous pals asked her a question or two, and she answered them! It's not a terribly hard-to-grasp feature. Anyway the above quote comes in response to a question from author Sarah Cooper; other people doing the asking include half of the SNL casts over the years, Amy Sedaris, Paul Reubens, Natasha Lyonne, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Carol fuckin' Burnett -- endless proof that Maya is indeed that cool. And you'll definitely want to look for the Prince story.  

"If It Doesn't Charge Your Phone..."

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"... or suck your clit nobody wants it."

First things first as you see there The Great Cole Escola has gifted us with an hour-long quarantine comedy special called "Help! I'm Stuck! with Cole Escola" that, if you haven't watched it yet, I say WATCH IT. I only caught wind of it this morning (it dropped on the 30th apparently) so I'm only halfway through but We Worship Cole Escola around these parts. Anybody who's alright with Amy Sedaris, and anybody who'll pose with a copy of Larry Kramer's book Faggots when asked by a total stranger, is alright by me. 

Second things second I'm taking today off from blogging. I know, I know, I just took the whole damn weekend off (although the immortal words of the Dowager Countess questioning the reality of "a weekend" have never felt more felt than now) but I got a late start today (because I actually went and exercised, give me a slow clap, folks) and I've got a ton of catch-up to play on several fronts and, in summation, it'll just be easier, and more fruitful for the week ahead, if I don't tie myself to my laptop all day long. But here, to tide y'all over, on top of all that Cole Escola here's some Patrick Wilson's bicep -- enjoy that and we'll chat tomorrow!

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Thanks @hbomax for helping entertain our quarantine crew. Some members are VERY excited for the new Elmo show. And... thank you for your generous contributions to @unicef! #GiftfromHBOMax #HBOMaxPlaydate

A post shared by Patrick Wilson (@thereelpatrickwilson) on May 4, 2020 at 8:06am PDT

Good Morning, World

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I wonder if Justin Theroux realizes how fortunate he is to be friends with Amy Sedaris -- whenever he douches out, which is often, I just remind myself that Amy loves him and so I gotta set aside the douche. His new interview with GQ (thx Mac), which comes with these perfectly fine photos, has him douching out over all the secret little hideaways that he loves in Japan, but it does give us this quote at least:

"It's sort of an unhygienic habit to grab people with fists and start pumping away."

Yes I took that totally out of context but it's way better that way, believe me. Anyway it's not all of them, you should click over to GQ for that, but I've got a select few of their perfectly fine photo-shoot of Justin Theroux right here after the jump...

Quote of the Day

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Oh joy, Interview Magazine got a whole slew of Amy Sedaris' famous nut-bag friends to ask her a question or two for their upcoming issue, and there are a couple of choice moments therein that almost made me cause a scene here in my office just now reading them and exploding into violent laughter. (The exchange between her and her brother David, oh my god.) People featured include John Waters, Juliette Lewis, Maya Rudolph, Cole Escola... really, just all the people that matter. All of 'em! I especially loved the exchange between her and her BFF Justin Theroux though:

JUSTIN: Dear Amy, I’m feeling a little down on myself lately. Can you give me five quick tips that will make me feel more “ladylike” overnight? Signed, Sad Sack.
AMY: 1. Put on a transparent pair of panties.
 2. Apply lipstick to your cheekbones.
 3. Remove the lice from your hair.
 4. Make sausage hair curls using real sausage.
 5. Tuck your penis between your ass cheeks.

Okay okay I mostly just wanted to give a second and a third thought to Justin Theroux tucking his penis between his ass cheeks, it's true. Click on over to read the whole thing, and to delight in the high-larious photos taken by Tina Tyrell too. The third season of her deranged crafting show At Home really can't get here soon enough.

Pic of the Day

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Happy Pride from @coleescola and my boyfriend’s copy of Larry Kramer’s book Faggots which he made him pose with #queerliberationmarch #larrykramer #gaypride #nyc

A post shared by Jason Adams (@jasonaadams) on Jun 30, 2019 at 10:20am PDT

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So I ended up going to a Pride event this weekend even though the crowds and noise and glitter of those things are not really my thing -- the temptation to hear Larry Kramer speak at the rally for the Queer Liberation March was enough to push me over my issues. Plus shade, plus the ability to escape quickly. A perfect Pride cocktail! Anyway while we were waiting for the rally to begin who should my boyfriend and I see had plunked down beside us in that shade but the great Cole Escola, who was my favorite thing about Difficult People and then is currently one of my favorite things on At Home With Amy Sedaris. I wasn't going to bother him because I'm shy and this is New York, it always feels uncouth to bug celebs, but my boyfriend has no such qualms and immediately told him what fans we are and got him to pose with the copy of Larry Kramer's book Faggots which he's currently re-reading. (Sidenote: I wish somebody would make a trashy nighttime soap out of Faggots.) Anyway Cole was super sweet and wished us a "Happy Pride" and then Larry Kramer came out and chastised homosexuals for being shitty lazy people who've failed the movement -- it was a perfect Pride afternoon.
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Larry Kramer made me feel like garbage so I consider today my most successful Gay Pride ever

— Jason Adams (@JAMNPP) June 30, 2019

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... the lil' dumplin' that came between

Justin Theroux and Paul Dinello. (via)

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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

... you can learn from:

Strangers With Candy (1999)

Jerri: I cried when I had no shoes, until I met a man
who had no feet. And then I laughed really hard.

A happy 57 to the genius Amy Sedaris.

Did y'all watch her At Home show? High-larious!

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Quote of the Day

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“I just wanted Ryan to know that I loved him no matter whether he won or lost. It doesn’t matter. It’s how you play the game, and he showed up and gave his all. It doesn’t change anything in my heart.” 

-- That's Andrew Garfield telling Stephen Colbert last night why the cameras caught him and Ryan Reynolds making out during the Globes this past weekend. In case you're keeping track this is the good kind of gay-baiting. I guess Andy went on to kiss Colbert a little on his show as well, although I haven't watched that yet. I can't see Stephen kissing other men - it makes me weep for Mr. Jellinek. Jellinek & Noblet Forever!!!

Be My Mistress

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This week's been nothing but hell-fire and torment for me, waiting for tonight to arrive -- tonight is the night that I finally see Mistress America, Greta Gerwig's new movie with Noah Baumbach, their follow-up to my favorite movie of the decade so far Frances Ha. All hellish week it's been a bunch of people posting their glowing reviews of the film and a bunch of other people (I'm looking at you, Amy Sedaris) posting pictures of Greta at other screenings that I was not at, cut to me sitting here on my thumbs literally dying inside with each and every one. WHAT ABOUT ME??? Well my time has come. The rest of you plebes can have Mistress tomorrow, but tonight, tonight, tonight Greta and I will dance and laugh and talk of memories past... or we will die trying!

(PS I have tomorrow off so everybody have a great weekend!)

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I Am Link

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--- Captain Bendy - Hey remember that Olympic-comedy called The Bronze that played at Sundance and everybody went crazy about the gymnastic funny sex-scene between Sebastian Stan (ahem, make that "a very naked Sebastian Stan") and Melissa Rauch? Well Vulture caught up with Sebastian and even though the movie's not coming out until July he was still happy to talk about it, and so we get this quote:

"I really enjoyed the people I was working with, and when they explained to me what the scene was about, it was so funny," Stan said. "I just thought, You know what, you’ve just got to jump in the water sometimes, right? You’ve just got to take your clothes off and go for it." So he overcame his initial hesitations about baring all? "No that’s the thing, I had no hesitation. I was very happy about it."

And I have no doubt that the rest of us will also be very happy about it when our time comes, Sebastian. But seriously, how refreshing is this - I'm so tired of hearing people with perfectly sculpted everythings talk about how stressful nude scenes are. Be proud! Show that shit off and fuck off with fake modesty, movie stars.
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--- Once You Go Blank - There were a few awesome things to come out of Esquire's tournament of great canceled shows, pitting the ones that got away against each other in a battle to the rebootening, but possibly the best was they got Amy Sedaris & Paul Dinello to talk about Strangers With Candy, and tell us where they think Jerri Blank would be today. The most interesting thing to me is how clear they both are that they don't have any desire to bring Jerri back again, and how instead of being sad I weirdly kinda get it.

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--- Hot Pie - Another good thing to come from that Esquire tournament was the most deserving show on the ballot Pushing Daisies winning the fucking tournament -- yee-haw! They talked to the Pie-Maker himself Lee Pace right before the thing ended and he spoke about the show with great affection and seemingly an openess to revisit it where-ever and whenever. Get on it, Bryan Fuller & Co. Speaking of BF, he tweeted the news over the weekend that Neil Marshall is directing an episode of Hannibal this season. Ahh!!!
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--- Charmed By Billy - Into the Woods hit blu-ray today I think and so I guess the cast has been making the rounds... I say "I guess" because all I've seen are interviews with Billy Magnussen, and really that's all I care about seeing. so we're doing fine. Over at Broadway.com Billy lists his six favorite moments from the movie's set and he gives us this ridiculous nugget:

"Dude, I love babes. I love babes! I’d love to always be surrounded by talented, beautiful women. I’m cool with that."

I allllmost want to say he's trying wayyyyy too hard - I LOVE BABES!!! - but somehow picturing him saying these things makes it all sound adorable. Blond hair and a baby-face like his will probably always poison my mind. And then also over at ET Billy talks a bunch about those leather pants, because why wouldn't he? (thanks Mac)
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--- The Queen - I was going through the links I'll email to myself for these posts just now and gasped when I saw this one because I'd totally forgotten about it and even I haven't gotten around to reading it yet - here's Margaret Atwood (her name should probably be all in caps) talking about A Game of Thrones. Margaret Atwood talking about A Game of Thrones! Holy shit!
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--- But Back to speaking of important things like Bulging Princes (we'd speak on this subject all day long if the material was always there, believe you me) -- Richard Madden is still being asked about his bulging Prince Charming trousers, and he's still being adorably dorky about the subject. As if I'd mind if he turned to the wall while wearing them! The view's good from all sides, Richie!
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--- Fresh Animals - The news that Tom Ford is about to make a second movie (after 20009's fantastic A Single Man) broke the other week but only now do we know what he's doing - it's an adaptation of Austin Wright's book Tony and Susan (anyone read it?) which he's renaming Nocturnal Animals, which is about a suburban wife whose first husband, an author, sends her his new book to critique, which draws her into some sort of thriller. Ford will no doubt make all of this into astonishingly stylish stuff.
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--- And Finally, such is the type of day that it is that I can save this news for last -- The X-Files is officially coming back, you guys. KABOOM. Production on the six-episode run will begin this summer, with everybody you care about being there - that is to say Chris Carter & Gillian Anderson & David Duchovny (no word on David Duchovny's red speedo yet) - set to be there.

Today's Fanboy Delusion

Today I'd rather be...

... making Justin Theroux my number one and only.

Okay so first things first these pictures of Justin in Interview Magazine (thanks Mac) are hot hot hot, aren't they? They're making me want to go all James Franco and reenact Cruising with him. Lots and lots of Cruising.

Second things second, the actual interview with Justin in the magazine (I know, what, read???) was conducted by his pal slash incredible-human-being Amy Sedaris, so it's worth the effort y'all. Loved this exchange while they talked about Justin's new show The Leftovers:

SEDARIS: You know how I want to play a cop. I'm so jealous.
THEROUX: [laughs] You're dying to play a cop.
SEDARIS: You cry in this show.
THEROUX: Oh, I cry. [laughs]
SEDARIS: And still I want to laugh at you because I know you."

Justin also goes on to say that he thinks 

that sweatpants are disgusting, which...

... we all know better than that, sir!

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I Am Link

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--- All About Amy - One of the movies I'm most sad about missing at Tribeca because of timing issues (there are only so many hours and so much sanity in a day) is Goodbye To All That, the new movie from the director of Junebug which stars three of my favorite people - Paul Schneider, Melanie Lynskey, and in a small but inevitably memorable (always memorable) turn Amy Sedaris. IndieWire caught up with Miss Amy to talk about the movie and her process and oh my god it's a delightful thing to read. (thanks Mac) Loved this bit about having to adapt her affinity for broadness to different director's visions:

"I'm always like, 'Why'd you hire me?' It's just so hard to pull back, or you pull back a little, and then you feel like you're not doing much. I always like to have some kind of weird character. I need something to hide behind so it's weird if I don't have that."

--- Image Maker - It's weird that I'd forgotten what a fantastic music video director Birth and Under the Skin director Jonathan Glazer was, since he directed a couple of Radiohead videos that sit amongst the greatest things the medium ever produced, but I did, so thankfully this list of his best videos at The Playlist is there to remind me. Their #1 pick makes me cry whenever I watch it, just so you know.

--- Timed Out - I suppose this is sort of spoilery for the next X-Men movie but whatever, I don't really know anything and this is what I figured, it's not rocket science - they'll be using the time travel story-line and this new movie as a way to give most of the old folks (McKellen, Stewart, Berry, et al) the boot I mean "a proper farewell" and swing things into a new timeline where younger prettier things can take center stage. Shocker! Except for Hugh Jackman! He'll be popping those rage roid veins from his forearms til he's in the triple digits.

--- Jobs For Everybody - Last week I wrote about how Danny Boyle and Ewan McGregor had supposedly finally recently made up after Boyle chose Leonardo Dicaprio over Ewan for The Beach, and how that meant we might finally see the sequel to Trainspotting, so I find it funny to read today that Boyle might be making the Steve Jobs movie (the one that David Fincher got kicked off of slash abandoned) with Leo in the lead his next movie - funny because what if Boyle delays working with Ewan for Leo again? Feud forever!

--- Shaky Cam Love In - You probably know that I'm more forgiving for the found-footage genre of horror than a lot of people seem to be - I think there are things about it that work marvelously well. That you-are-there vérité feel can make a movie walk on water. So I'm down with this article over at Fangoria giving love to the sub-genre, although some of the titles mentioned (oh my god Apollo 18 noooooo) need never be thought of ever ever again and you hurt your argument by bringing them up, sir.

--- Hot Mess - I haven't watched any of the Lindsay Lohan reality show, I didn't think I could deal with her anymore, but Kim Morgan's piece at Vulture on it has me aiming for a binge watch once the whole thing's available. Bless Kim for always reminding me of the value of damaged difficult complicated messy interesting women - my exasperation with tabloid nonsense sometimes makes me forget.

--- Knight Down - I am a little bit weirded out by the reaction people have had to the rape scene on this week's episode of Game of Thrones - I agree that the episode's director stuck his foot in his mouth talking about it, but if you're not going to protest scenes like a little child being forced to watch his parents be murdered in front of him, which also happened that episode, then maybe you should step back your indignation a little bit. It's a show about complicated generally horrible people doing complicated generally horrible things, and just because it's the dreamy guy doing it now everybody's all conflicted or betrayed or whatever. Good! Be conflicted! Let's not forget he threw a child out of a window in the first episode, either - I don't recall the internet being split at the seams with outrage then. Maybe don't expect your morality to be kowtowed to a show as amoral as this one, is all I am saying. Anyway the funniest thing about all of this to me was George R R Martin's reaction, which was basically - I don't know nothin' bout no TV show, yo!
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I Am Link

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--- Gyllen All - Jake's making the talk show rounds this week for Prisoners, and here he is on Kelly & Michael (typing the name of that show feels so wrong sans any Regis) where they apparently get him to say whether he sleeps in the nude or not. Anybody want to watch the clip and tell me what he says? I don't think I can sit through any Kelly & Michael, even with Jake Gyllenhaal possibly talking about being naked. Bonus: Jake's on Inside the Actor's Studio tonight!

--- DC Funnies - The creator of the comic-strip Doonesbury is making a comedy series for Amazon (who are apparently getting in on the Netflix type instant entertainment business) about a group of US senators who become roommates, and Amy Sedaris and Wanda Sykes will be on it. I'm sold already.

--- Ruff Ruff - Finally a little bit o' detail on that animated dog movie that Noah Baumbauch and Greta Gerwig are both on the record as an upcoming project of theirs, much to the world's brow-arched bafflement - it's apparently an adaptation of a book from a series called Flawed Dogs by someone who goes by the name Berkeley Breathed. Mkay. It's about dog show dogs on an adventure.

--- Downed Man - Angelina Jolie hasn't had much success with the directing thing but kudos to her for keeping on keeping on; we need more women directors, and she's certainly got the pull to get things done. Next she's making a WWII pic about a former Olympian turned solider who crashes in the ocean and survives being at sea for two months, only to wash up behind enemy lines and become a POW. Skins star Jack O'Connell (seen to the right) has already got the lead; Garret Hedlund just joined the cast as the leader of the prisoners at the camp.

--- Red Writer - Only two weeks of Breaking Bad left (didja hear the final two eps are 75 minutes long each?) so we turn to what Walter's up to next - Bryan Cranston is going to star in a bio-pic about screenwriter Dalton Trumbo (that's a name and a half; straight out of a Raymond Carver story) who was blacklisted because he refused to cooperate with the Communist witch trials of the Fifties. He went to Mexico and churned out scripts that got made anyway, only under a different dude's name.

--- Times A Charm - An upcoming Aussie thriller called Kill Me Three Times has gathered together an interesting cast - Simon Pegg and Theresa Palmer are enough to sell me on their own, but it's also got Sullivan Stapleton (he was one of the brothers in Animal Kingdom, and he's in the upcoming 300 sequel, and as you can see to the left, he's hot) and also the Other Hemsworth, the one called Luke. (thanks Glenn)

--- Northern Exposure - Hey remember how there was some kind of film festival in Canada last week? Well if you haven't totally moved on you ought to check out Amir's first of two recaps of his take on the fest over at The Film Experience; everything he has to say about the Oscars drowning out everything seems gosh-darn smart to me.

--- And finally, director David Ayer last made the much better than it had any right being End of Watch so we're paying attention to his next one, a WWII "trapped in a tank behind enemy lines" flick called Fury, which will star a bevy of attractive gentlemen like Brad Pitt, Logan Lerman, Shia LaBeouf, Michael Pena and Jon Bernthal. Anyway Ayer tweeted this photo of the cast yesterday, and I like it:

Quote of the Day II

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"The audiences for shows like that are odd. Everyone dresses in colors like canary yellow and chili pepper red, very bright. Very few men. They're older, and look spaced out. I don't know where they come from."

-- That's Amy Sedaris talking about her experience being on Martha Stewart's talk show in an interview chock full of quote-of-the-day-worthy quotes over at The Awl. but then I dub everything that woman says gold, gold, pure gold! She also admits that she's never had a cell phone, which makes me feel like a quitter since I just finally broke down a year ago and got my first one. I was standing in solidarity with her and never even knew! We were like Fievel and Linda Ronstadt!

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