i knew it was going to be a bad week when i was scheduled to present not one but two morbidities for tomorrow.
I prepared the cases over the weekend; nevermind that there were several amendments today; it was done by five.
The department secretaries chose to dump tomorrows pre and post op presentation on me tomorrow morning too by SMSing me that they were leaving me the thumb drive in my pigeon hole, somewhere around 11 am.
Not known entirely what this entailed, I thought I'd try to take it in my stride; today I was supposed to meet the other half after work to go shopping, and I'll admit this (sheepishly) - I was really looking forward to it.
I found out what it entailed around five thirty, after the day was over, when my registrar told me exactly what I needed to have prepared...
it was a lot more than I expected.
There was nothing for it but to grit my teeth and start preparing... what's so hard about filling in histology results and outcomes.... well it gets hard when there are about fifty of them to do.
I finished (triumphantly) around seven thirty and was getting ready to fly when the other MO on call told me I needed to create a list of the preops as well, so that when they ask to see the scans at random tomorrow I'll have it all ready.
How long could that possibly take?
Five minutes turned into ten, and then fifteen.
And then suddenly I was done, and suddenly it was seven fifty.
And then I got The SMS.
And suddenly everything was too late.
And suddenly, I am unforgiven.
I tried so hard. So god-damned hard. And I'm so very, very tired now.
So very tired.
*****
Why I didn't call? I thought I would make it on time, and call you and wake you up as I was driving over... the way we used to be. I hate waking you up... I know how much you treasure your sleep.
More fool me.