Bold fashion Choices--The Invisible Bikini!

Young secretary Kim Garland has decided to leave her job, and spend her life saving on a cruise to Europe, because Romance Comic!!

Well, it turns out that this cruise ship has an interesting tradition:

Isn't that special?

Kim's biggest competition is her cabin-mate, Cynthia Carter, who will stop at nothing to win this highly-coveted honor!

There's a swimming competition (Kim wins!). There's a talent show--Cynthia destroys Kim's dress and knocks her out, causing her to give a poor performance! Cynthia wins!

Which means it all comes down to...the Beauty Contest!!

Oh, my, that must be some bikini!! I can't wait until the next panel shows it!

Wait--what? You're not going to show a girl in a bikini? You can show one piece bathing suits, not two? You can have characters drooling over how hot she is, but you can't actually show us how hot she is??

This was perhaps the biggest rip-off in comic book history.

Oh, yeah, Cynthia won on points, but Kim saved a little girl from drowning, so the Captain used his power "to ignore the point total if he feels one girl is worth more than the others." And in the world of 1963 Dell romance comics, saving a child is worth more than the hottest bikini that we will never see.

From Private Secretary #2 (1963)

Mad Women

Yes, Dell took a stab at romance comics:

That's one hell of a cover...too bad we don't have credits for it.

Kim Garland is a Wichita gal, come to New York, with big dreams:

Well, in an obvious rip-off from Mad Men, she proceeds to sleep her way to the top (well, OK, it's a 1962 comic book, so she necks her way to the top). Starting in the secretarial pool at the "largest advertising agency in the world," she proceeds to hook an executive with a little flirtation and kissing, and refuses to continue the relationship until he gives her a job as his private secretary or assistant. Once she has the gig, she cuts the proto-Draper off. and sets her sights on the next rung of the corporate  ladder:

Ouch. She does this 4 times (!), finally hooking up with/working for the company's executive vice-president--until she ends up going power mad, losing friends, and getting fired.

Fortunately, she ends up meeting Bob, the cute but poor actor she spurned earlier. He's becoming an off-Broadway producer, and he needs...a private secretary!!

Well, there was a second issue of Private Secretary...

(Again, no credits for the cover :-( )...

Apparently, this is set on Earth-2, because it stars Kim Garland again, but the events of the 1st issue seem to have never happened. Now she's a secretary to a "trio of ad executives." But she takes off for the glamor of a European vacation!!

After a whirlwind series of romances--cruise ship officers! Matadors! Television executives!--she comes back home, realizing...

Aim high, girlfriend. Aim high!