The Best Cover You've Never Seen--Captain Marvel #34 (1974)

Well, you probably have seen this one...

...but it get extra credit for being the truest cover in Marvel history.

Art by Jim Starlin.

Manic Hostess Monday--What's Really Happening To The Bees!!

You know who had the weirdest Hostess ads?

Captain Marvel had the weirdest damned Hostess ads:

"A family of outer space killer bees." Really.

So that's why the bees are dying off--Mar-Vell filled them with snack cakes, so they all died of malnutrition!!

You know, keeping the royal family here on Earth strikes me as a really poor idea. What if they breed? What if Swarm gets a hold of them??

Anyway, Marvel's other Hostess foes included...

...a "giant flea-market-eating flea."

And:

...a huge disembodied mouth.

WHAT THE HELL, MARVEL???!

Then again, you wanted Mar-Vell to thwart Thanos with cupcakes?

Also, Captain Marvel also has the unique distinction of being the only hero to face the villain who would eventually kill in "real life" in a Hostess ad:

I think Nitro wins in the long run, Mar-Vell...

Friday Night Fights--Doofus With Slippers Style!!

Holiday weeks cramp my style, so there's no time for lengthy prologue--let's just hit the ground running with today's Friday Night Fights!

Nitro (after he killed Captain Marvel, before he blew up Stamford) has been hired to blow up Wall Street!! The Heroes For Hire have been...well, hired, to stop him.

Hercules is already down, so it's up to Iron Fist to be the man...(click to embiggen for full dialogue glory...)

The result?

Well, Nitro hurt his widdle hand, but Danny is unconscious. So I guess we have to declare Nitro the winner!

Spacebooger reassures us that the Black Knight took down Nitro, so the good guys did win...Black Knight? Really?

Fists of fury from Heroes For Hire #3 (1997), by John Ostrander, Pascual Ferry, and Jaime Mendoza

Now is the time for you to go and vote for my fight. Why? Things go BOOM!!! So go vote!!