Marvel 1971 Week--X-Men #69

Well, we've reached a sad point in Marvel 1971 Week...

We're out of new comics to review!!

I've rattled on about how the X-Men were demoted to a bimonthly reprint book back in the early 1970's. But, unless I'm going to do Millie The Model or Our Love Story, I've already covered every new comic Marvel put out in 1971!! (Not that I didn't want to cover a Stan Lee/Gene Colan romance story, but I don't have the issue!).

We'll talk more about that after the jump. First, a couple of brief points about the stories covered in this issue of X-Men.

First up, a reprint of X-Men #17 (1966), the conclusion of the first Sentinel saga:

"Jay Gavin" is a pen name for Werner Roth...

And I've said it before, and I'll say it again--those costumes are the worst thing Jack Kirby EVER designed!

And now, a question about Professor X:

I know it was a fairly dire emergency, but really--controlling their minds? Couldn't you have just beamed a "help me" into their minds, instead of "forcing them to obey"? Doesn't that seem more like something a villain would do??

It seems to me an awful lot like the Jedi--using the Force to "influence" the "weak-minded" sounds an awful lot like a Dark Side power to me, as it's just another phrase for "taking away someone's free will and making them a puppet." But you never see a Sith using it, only Jedi. I guess, like Charles Xavier, they think it's OK to do bad stuff if you're good guys...

And, of course, the issue end with Bolivar Trask, creator of the Sentinels, undergoing the least convincing transformation from racist to good guy since Clint Eastwood in Gran Torino:




This was a double-size issue, so we leap to the next story, from X-Men #19 (1966):

This is the story that introduced Calvin Rankin, the Mimic, who could gain the superpowers of anyone, as long as he stayed close to them.

So, he accidentally stumble across some X-People in their civilian identities, and since he gains their powers, figures out who they are. He decides to go and gain all their powers...

He kidnaps Jean, and reveal his secret origin, which is essentially that of Barry Allen...

Man, getting super-powers was easy back in those days.

Anyway, his scientist dad was trying to develop a machine to make the powers Cal absorbed permanent, but an angry mob, and explosion, and a cave-in killed him--and buried the machine!

So that's why he needs the X-Men's powers--so he can dig dad's device from the debris! But, Professor X briar patches him into using the device...why?


Ha ha...it's good for Professor X to use his powers like Zatanna in Identity Crisis!! Yay!!

ELSEWHERE IN THE MARVEL UNIVERSE:

As discussed above, Marvel didn't actually have that many new titles being published in 1971. They only had 12 all new non-super-hero title for the entire month!! (OK, I'm counting Sgt. Fury...sue me!)

What was up? Well, Marvel had only recently gotten out from under the thumb on the terrible distribution deal with a distributor owned by DC, which limited the number of comics they could publish each month (reports have had it between 8 and 12). So why no "Marvel Explosion"?

This is all speculation on my part, but I suspect they just didn't have the manpower yet. Literally every comic in April 1971 was written by Stan, Roy or Gerry; Jack had just left, and they didn't have that many artists, either...certainly none who could come close to matching his output.

Within a few years a new wave of talent would be put to good use--Englehart, Wolfman, Wein, Gerber, Friedrich, for example--but until then, Marvel just didn't seem to have the bodies to produce more new books

But, I'm guessing that didn't want to cede the rack space (and sales dollars) to DC...so why not do reprints?

What other reason, for example, could there have been to have three--3!!--separate Western monthly Western reprint titles being published?



Not to mention innumerable monster/horror reprint books, that rotated on a bi-monthly basis?

Not to mention several super-hero reprint titles??



Not that I have anything against reprint titles. To fans back in those days, they were probably the only way to get access to many of these stories, barring lucky finds at garage sales or flea markets.

Not to mention, many of the younger fans probably didn't even realize these were reprints--just more Spider-Man and Thor stories!! One of the earliest comics I owned was a coverless copy of Marvel Triple Action, reprinting the classic Avengers #16...but it was years until I realized it was "just" a reprint!!

And in those pre-internet, pre-Showcase and Essentials era, these reprint titles were the best--if not the only--way to learn about Marvel history and back story, and in convenient 15 or 25 cent doses! And, of course, reprint or not, they helped build the Marvel brand name in kids' minds.

Nowadays, of course, reprints are in trades or expensive Omnibi or Masterworks or Absolutes, which is nicer for reading and collecting, perhaps, but obviously much harder for young readers to afford (various "read the first issue for a dollar" reprints and Walking Dead Weekly are obvious exceptions). Part of me wonders if, for the sake of attracting new young readers, Marvel or DC shouldn't try and experiment with a floppy reprint series or two, just to see what happens...

Friday Night Fights--Incredible Hulk 1971 Style

Yes, minions, it's time for a new bout of Friday Night Fights, and keeping with the Marvel 1971 theme here this week, we've got a doozy:

And who created this barnburner of a battle for Hulk #138 (1971)?

So, long story short (some of which I'll cover after the fight), Sandman shows up, menaces Betty Ross, Bruce gets upset, fight!! Take it away, guys!!







After many (many) more panels of fussing and feuding, they end up submerged. But that can't stop these guys!




Oh, Hulk, how wrong you are...

Spacebooger thought Sandman had enough sense to stay out of the water. Sadly, he was wrong.

Now, if you want to vote for my fight this week, who am I to tell you no? after the jump, we'll have some discussion of the non-fight events of this issue.

OK, let's take a quick hit at some things from Incredible Hulk #138. First off, Herb Trimpe took the concept of a splash page very literally:

Sorry if I cribbed your act again, Siskoid!

On the very next page, Roy Thomas and Trimpe get very literary (click to embiggen for easier reading):

Yes, that is the poem The Sorrow Of Love by W.B. Yeats. An actual, honest-to-gosh bit of English literature used to narrate the Hulk's transformation into Bruce Banner. You don't see that too often in 2011 comics from the Big Two!!

Meanwhile, the Sandman has got a problem:


See, being locked in a high pressure vat turned him to glass. The Wizard managed to "cure" him, but it's wearing off.

By a necessary coincidence, Betty Ross is at the very same hospital...and she clearly needs to lay off the the Quad Beef Burritos before bedtime!



Anyhoo, Dr. Marquand's revolutionary new treatment, the "Total Blood Transfusion," involves two people (of matching types) completely swapping their blood!! And just guess who has the Sandman's blood type?

Well, when Betty starts to feel woozy because of the Sandman's no doubt icky blood, Flint Marko proves to be a delightful jackass:

Hmmm...you know, that Sand-Witch idea is much more appealing then the Red She-Hulk business...

But, the final effect of the transfusion is:

Someone cue Blondie's Heart Of Glass!!

SPOILER ALERT: She got better. Then she got turned into a bird. Then she got better. Then she married Bruce Banner, but left him after their baby miscarried. Then she became a nun. Then she stopped being a nun. Then the Abomination put HIS blood into her, which killed her. But she was only mostly dead, and her dad cryogenically preserved her. Then, 9/11 allowed Nightmare into our world, and he raped her comatose body to produce his daughter, Daydream. (I really wish I were making that last part up. Remember that one the next time you're ragging on DC for Identity Crisis...). The she was revived and turned into the Red She-Hulk.

So, being turned into glass was probably the least of Betty's many problems, is what I'm sayin.'

ELSEWHERE IN THE MARVEL UNIVERSE:

Speaking of a Roy Thomas scripted strongman saving a beautiful damsel from a horrible monster:

OK, I know, it's a stretch. But still--Conan! Roy Thomas! Barry Windsor-Smith! Giant spiders! Scantily clad babes! WOO HOO!!!

Marvel 1971 Week--Iron Man #36!!

You know who I don't like?

Tony Stark, that's who I don't like!

Seriously. I know that the events of Civil War brought it to a head for most people. But more and more I find that, as I look back at any era, Tony Stark in just a smug, unlikable bastard. He can take storylines that Peter Parker can make work just fine, and ruin them with his preening ego and self-indulgent self-pity. Take this story, for example:

OK, we're coming in on the the middle of something here. This is the denouement of a story featuring Iron Man, Daredevil (?), Nick Fury and S.H.I.E.L.D., and Madame Masque, versus Zodiac and Spymaster and the Brotherhood Of The Ankh. The story ran through the last couple of issues of Iron Man and Daredevil, and you might be asking, why Daredevil?

Because Gerry Conway was writing both Iron Man and Daredevil at the time, that's why!

Anyway, all the heroes and villains have been returned home from some mysterious dimension, with no possibility of actually accomplishing anything. So, there's no use in doing anything except:

Nope, it's time for a long, gratuitous fight scene!! Most of which I've omitted for you, with the exception of...

...Nick Fury's hip lingo!! Wahoo!!

Meanwhile, Spymaster is getting away, something that doesn't sit well with Iron Man, since the master of espionage put Jasper Sitwell in a coma.

But Shellhead is easily distracted by threats to civilians, so:

And the Spymaster skulks away...

You know, Conway obviously had some plans for Spymaster's secret identity, but nothing ever came of it...when he "died" 16 years later, his identity had still hadn't to be revealed. And when we learned that he had merely "faked his death" (yeah, as if) during Dark Reign, we still never learned his alter ego...and then he faked his death again!!

Now that the battle is over, Madame Masque (who doesn't know at this point that Iron Man is Tony Stark) turns the the Golden Avenger for some relationship advice:


Sadly, the fact there is a woman in the world who doesn't want him sends Tony spinning off into a ridiculous existential crisis:


And now, it's time for the grand Stark declaration:

"The new, improved playboy-industrialist"??? "Tony Stark comes alive"?? Oh, dear whatever could that be?

Well, the first thing he does is take a leave of absence as Stark CEO. He's going to enjoys the fruits of his wealth!

Yes, running a Fortune 500 company and being a super-hero was adolescent, while quitting your job to live a life of luxury and sloth is apparently all grown up. Oh, Tony, you douche...

Still, there's one good reason to get back into the swinging lifestyle:

Because Don Heck can draw the ladies!!

Ah, but Tony's new, mature lifestyle of the rich and selfish is destined to be short-lived, because arriving from the depths of space:

Ramrod is dormar spelled backwards. I just wanted to note that.

Well, as Ramrod sets about leveling New York and killing cops, poor poor Tony broods about how unfair his life is:



Oh, shut the hell up!! You're making the Silver Surfer look stoic!!

But wait, there's more!

Man oh man, and I thought Peter Parker could whine about his lot. But, apparently, the life of a billionaire is just unendurable angst.

Now, you'd think that an invasion from space would interrupt Stark's pity party (which, by the way, would be a GREAT name for a band--Stark's Pity Party!). And you'd be right...


...for all of two panels. Because as Tony sets about placing explosives all over Ramrod, he can't even focus on the task at hand--he still has to devote every single thought balloon to his poor-little-rich-boy concerns:


But maybe Iron man should have been focusing more on the task at hand, because:


For a full 15 minutes they're trapped underground, buried by tons and tons and tons of rubble. But...

Hold that thought!

Now, remember how, in the early days, every single damned story would have Tony Stark's poor damaged heart threatening to quit at least once? Supposedly, this new transplanted heart was supposed to end that.

What, and give up such a keen, infinitely reusable plot device? I think not!

And Ramrod gives us perhaps the perfect epitaph for Tony Stark"

"His lips were wont of control." Priceless!!

Spoiler alert: Iron Man survives. And no, it's not that Wrecking Crew in the next issue.

So, Tony Stark: a self-pitying, whiny, arrogant jerk in any era. God, I hate that guy.

ELSEWHERE IN THE MARVEL UNIVERSE:

Speaking of Gerry Conway writing stories with Nick Fury in them:

Even though he was only 18, Conway was the regular writer on Iron Man and Daredevil, and he was doing many a guest stints like this one. And, as I mentioned elsewhere, within a couple of years he'd be writing Thor, Amazing Spider-Man and Fantastic Four.

You know, my guidance counselor never told me I could be writing comic books right out of high school...