Pitchers and catchers report next week, so it's time to celebrate with a special baseball-themed Friday Night Fights.
Jimmy Olsen and the Newsboy Legion are trapped underground by Jack Kirby's greatest forgotten villain, Victor Volcanum. Superman is there to rescue them (and thwart Volcanum's mad schemes)...but Victor has a legion of robots to kill the interlopers!
ZOK BAP SPAK KKRRASH WHAM PYOW KRAAK!!
Spacebooger would like to sign Kal-El to pitch for the Indians.
Seven Robots Out from Jimmy Olsen #148 (1972) by Jack Kirby and Mike Royer (with the inks in Superman & Jimmy's faces done by Murphy Anderson, because heaven forbid you let Jack Freakin' Kirby draw anyone not 100% "on model")
Now is the time for you to go and vote for my fight. Why?!? If you don't, I'll just start raving about the Cubs...and nobody wants that! So go and vote!!
Showing posts with label Jimmy Olsen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jimmy Olsen. Show all posts
Friday, February 9, 2018
Tuesday, November 28, 2017
Jor-El, G-Man...Uh, K-Man?!?
Poor Superman is whining again about his dead parents...
Fortunately, Jimmy has a magic wishing totem (seriously) and decides towaste use the final wish on giving Superman his wish!
The real reason for typing? So we can have a stupid plot complication like this:
Oh, Jimmy. Typing "mate" when you meant "meet"? How does that even work? Sounds like a real naughty Freudian slip, to me!
Good thing this is a Silver Age, Code-approved book, then. I sure some modern creators would literally try make Superman mate his parents. Ewwwwww!!
Nope, that just means he has to help them get married. Phew!!
Kal-El meets them when they're young and adorable...but they have a secret!!
"Kil-Lor"? Kil-Lor?!?!?! Oh my.
You do have to love the partially obscured but very obvious swastika behind them. Were Jor-El and Lara space Nazis?!?
Just then...
The KBI!!
Ah, so Jor-El is undercover, infiltrating the space Nazis!! Gee, only two cliched things could go wrong with that plan...what are the odds of both of them happening here?
100%, it turns out!
Sure, you gotta trust the Kryptonian justice system!
D'oh!!
After Kal-El frees them, and creates some Kryptonite decades early in order to defeat Kil-Lor...
Damned convenient, this science stuff!
But...but...that's very timey-wimey!!
Wait!! If Superman hadn't intervened, they would have been on in suspended animation on their satellite for 100 years, and Kal-El would not have been born before Krypton exploded!! But...but...
Forget about it snell...it's the Silver Age.
From Superman #123 (1958)
Fortunately, Jimmy has a magic wishing totem (seriously) and decides to
The real reason for typing? So we can have a stupid plot complication like this:
Oh, Jimmy. Typing "mate" when you meant "meet"? How does that even work? Sounds like a real naughty Freudian slip, to me!
Good thing this is a Silver Age, Code-approved book, then. I sure some modern creators would literally try make Superman mate his parents. Ewwwwww!!
Nope, that just means he has to help them get married. Phew!!
Kal-El meets them when they're young and adorable...but they have a secret!!
"Kil-Lor"? Kil-Lor?!?!?! Oh my.
You do have to love the partially obscured but very obvious swastika behind them. Were Jor-El and Lara space Nazis?!?
Just then...
The KBI!!
Ah, so Jor-El is undercover, infiltrating the space Nazis!! Gee, only two cliched things could go wrong with that plan...what are the odds of both of them happening here?
100%, it turns out!
Sure, you gotta trust the Kryptonian justice system!
D'oh!!
After Kal-El frees them, and creates some Kryptonite decades early in order to defeat Kil-Lor...
Damned convenient, this science stuff!
But...but...that's very timey-wimey!!
Wait!! If Superman hadn't intervened, they would have been on in suspended animation on their satellite for 100 years, and Kal-El would not have been born before Krypton exploded!! But...but...
Forget about it snell...it's the Silver Age.
From Superman #123 (1958)
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DC Science,
Jimmy Olsen,
Jor-El,
Krypton,
Lara,
Silver Age,
Superman
Friday, September 1, 2017
Friday Night Fights--Mr. Action Style!
Who needs Superman?
Not Jimmy Olsen, as we find out in this week's Friday Night Fights!
But first:
Goddamn, Jimmy, you wear that black-shirt-with-white-polka-dots-in-a-green-leisure-suit look well!! If you've got it, flaunt it!!
Anyway...
WOK!!
Jimmy hit them so hard, they're seeing stars!!
Spacebooger cannot make up his mind whether Jimmy or those thugs have the worst outfit...
Street crime from Superman Family #185 (1977), by Tom DeFalco, Kurt Schaffenberger and Joe Giella.
Now is the time for you to go and vote for my fight. Why? My god, that suit!! Now go and vote!!
Not Jimmy Olsen, as we find out in this week's Friday Night Fights!
But first:
Goddamn, Jimmy, you wear that black-shirt-with-white-polka-dots-in-a-green-leisure-suit look well!! If you've got it, flaunt it!!
Anyway...
WOK!!
Jimmy hit them so hard, they're seeing stars!!
Spacebooger cannot make up his mind whether Jimmy or those thugs have the worst outfit...
Street crime from Superman Family #185 (1977), by Tom DeFalco, Kurt Schaffenberger and Joe Giella.
Now is the time for you to go and vote for my fight. Why? My god, that suit!! Now go and vote!!
Wednesday, May 31, 2017
Morgan Edge Is Earth-1's Hugh Hefner?!?!
Morgan Edge is throwing one hell of a shindig!
"Anything goes" parties? People don't want to be "caught" and embarrassed by what they're doing? Everyone wears costumes?!?
By Rao, Morgan Edge holds cosplay orgies at his mansion!
Plus...Spider-Man is there!!!! A trans-multiversal cosplay orgy!!
How could you let this happen, Comics Code?
BONUS: Jimmy Olsen hitting on a chick while wearing his Elastic Lad suit at a cosplay orgy is pretty creepy. Especially when it turns out that she is a distant descendant of his from the future (No, really!! She is!! COMICS!!)
From DC Comics Presents Annual #2 (1983)
"Anything goes" parties? People don't want to be "caught" and embarrassed by what they're doing? Everyone wears costumes?!?
By Rao, Morgan Edge holds cosplay orgies at his mansion!
Plus...Spider-Man is there!!!! A trans-multiversal cosplay orgy!!
How could you let this happen, Comics Code?
BONUS: Jimmy Olsen hitting on a chick while wearing his Elastic Lad suit at a cosplay orgy is pretty creepy. Especially when it turns out that she is a distant descendant of his from the future (No, really!! She is!! COMICS!!)
From DC Comics Presents Annual #2 (1983)
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Wertham Was Right
Wednesday, March 15, 2017
Why Did You Even Give Him A Signal Watch, Kal-El?
Some days...
Superman is not a very good best friend.
Just for the record, A) only Supergirl is having "bigger troubles" and B) Superman isn't going to help her or any other members of the Superman Family. He's going to The Fortress to use the "what if" machine (the same one he and Batman used to view the hypothetical Super Sons) to see what would have happened if Krypton had blown up before he was born. Because high priorities. [SPOILER ALERT: Infant Jor-El and infant Lara are launched to Earth, and adopted by separate Smallville families.]
Anyway, I had hoped that Jimmy would spend his story mocking Speedy ("Stop horsing around" "don't make me smack you" "Working with you is like a shot in the arm"). Alas, it was not to be...
From Superman Family #192 (1978)
Just for the record, A) only Supergirl is having "bigger troubles" and B) Superman isn't going to help her or any other members of the Superman Family. He's going to The Fortress to use the "what if" machine (the same one he and Batman used to view the hypothetical Super Sons) to see what would have happened if Krypton had blown up before he was born. Because high priorities. [SPOILER ALERT: Infant Jor-El and infant Lara are launched to Earth, and adopted by separate Smallville families.]
Anyway, I had hoped that Jimmy would spend his story mocking Speedy ("Stop horsing around" "don't make me smack you" "Working with you is like a shot in the arm"). Alas, it was not to be...
From Superman Family #192 (1978)
Thursday, March 9, 2017
Best Cover You've Never Seen--Superman Family #187 (1978)
Here's a question you don't get every day:
The answer is, "No, the world will NOT be destroyed when TWO SUPERMEN merge into a GIANT SUPERMAN." In fact, there were "miliseconds [sic] to spare" before two universes blew up!
Bonus: The Jimmy Olsen of Earth-2 got an organ transplant from the Jimmy Olsen of Earth-1. Considering Jimmy-1 had just been using the Elastic Man formula, that probably had some interesting results...
That is, by the way, Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez drawing (and inking) the living hell out of that cover.
The answer is, "No, the world will NOT be destroyed when TWO SUPERMEN merge into a GIANT SUPERMAN." In fact, there were "miliseconds [sic] to spare" before two universes blew up!
Bonus: The Jimmy Olsen of Earth-2 got an organ transplant from the Jimmy Olsen of Earth-1. Considering Jimmy-1 had just been using the Elastic Man formula, that probably had some interesting results...
That is, by the way, Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez drawing (and inking) the living hell out of that cover.
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Labels:
Covers,
Jimmy Olsen,
Superman,
Superman (Earth-2),
Superman Family
Monday, May 9, 2016
Manic Monday--Why Wasn't Jimmy Olsen Fragged In 'Nam?
There are good questions, and then there are really good questions:
Yeah--why the hell wasn't Jimmy drafted?
DC Comics: endorsing the idea that if you knew the right powerful people, you had every right to dodge the draft!!
From Jimmy Olsen #79 (1964)
Yeah--why the hell wasn't Jimmy drafted?
DC Comics: endorsing the idea that if you knew the right powerful people, you had every right to dodge the draft!!
From Jimmy Olsen #79 (1964)
Tuesday, January 19, 2016
Lois Lane And The Planet Of The Twiggies!
Just another day at the Daily Planet:
I'm not sure why Jimmy Olsen gets the primo job of interviewing the world's top super-model. Mr. Action indeed!
Oh, and I did say that it was a typical day in Metropolis, so their has to be at least one desperate attempt to kill Superman:
Oops.
It turns out that Lois has been dumped into an alternate dimension. But which one?
O.M.G.
Lois Lane--hot in any dimension!!
Don't worry, kids, it was just a dream. She woke up on boring old Earth-1.
Tune in next week, when Lois visits the planet of Melissa McCarthies!
From Lois Lane #79 (1967)
I'm not sure why Jimmy Olsen gets the primo job of interviewing the world's top super-model. Mr. Action indeed!
Oh, and I did say that it was a typical day in Metropolis, so their has to be at least one desperate attempt to kill Superman:
Oops.
It turns out that Lois has been dumped into an alternate dimension. But which one?
O.M.G.
Lois Lane--hot in any dimension!!
Don't worry, kids, it was just a dream. She woke up on boring old Earth-1.
Tune in next week, when Lois visits the planet of Melissa McCarthies!
From Lois Lane #79 (1967)
Thursday, November 12, 2015
The Lois Lane Guide To Staying Awake!!
Sometimes Superman isn't terribly smart...
Yeah, what possible harm could come from leaving an unknown alien artifact loose on Earth?
Especially when Perry's a total klutz!
Later, when Perry proves that he's a real newspaperman by falling asleep during a political speech:
Uh-oh...
As we saw earlier this morning, those aliens did manage to take over Jimmy, too!
So how does Lois manage to stay awake (and free)? First, she has to pull an all-nighter:
And the she overhears a sinister plan:
Well, Superman's gone from Earth for the next ten days. So Lois must, on her own, face:
Sadly, Lois didn't hear the part where the aliens say you have to be wearing the gem when you fall asleep to be taken over, so she never thinks to take the damn thing off.
She has some ways to stay awake, though...
...like slapping...
...and slurping...
...and Netflix...
...and wacky tricks...
...and excruciating tooth pain...
...and a non-Cosmic treadmill!
The evil aliens are getting impatient, so possessed-Jimmy slips Lois a rufie!!
But evil aliens have never seen Bugs Bunny cartoons!
Finally, on day 10, the aliens come up with the ultimate plan:
THE FAKE MATTRESS ADVERTISEMENT!!
Works every time!
Ah, but then Superman shows up, and destroys the gem shards (yes, I know, it woulds seem that he's killing the intelligences inside them. Shhhh....)
And Lois didn't turn, because earlier that day a reformed pickpocket she was doing a story on swiped her gem, to show her how good he was!!
So finally, sleepy-time for Lois!!
From Lois Lane #18 (1960), as reprinted in Superman Family #179 (1976)
Yeah, what possible harm could come from leaving an unknown alien artifact loose on Earth?
Especially when Perry's a total klutz!
Later, when Perry proves that he's a real newspaperman by falling asleep during a political speech:
Uh-oh...
As we saw earlier this morning, those aliens did manage to take over Jimmy, too!
So how does Lois manage to stay awake (and free)? First, she has to pull an all-nighter:
And the she overhears a sinister plan:
Well, Superman's gone from Earth for the next ten days. So Lois must, on her own, face:
Sadly, Lois didn't hear the part where the aliens say you have to be wearing the gem when you fall asleep to be taken over, so she never thinks to take the damn thing off.
She has some ways to stay awake, though...
...like slapping...
...and slurping...
...and Netflix...
...and wacky tricks...
...and excruciating tooth pain...
...and a non-Cosmic treadmill!
The evil aliens are getting impatient, so possessed-Jimmy slips Lois a rufie!!
But evil aliens have never seen Bugs Bunny cartoons!
Finally, on day 10, the aliens come up with the ultimate plan:
THE FAKE MATTRESS ADVERTISEMENT!!
Works every time!
Ah, but then Superman shows up, and destroys the gem shards (yes, I know, it woulds seem that he's killing the intelligences inside them. Shhhh....)
And Lois didn't turn, because earlier that day a reformed pickpocket she was doing a story on swiped her gem, to show her how good he was!!
So finally, sleepy-time for Lois!!
From Lois Lane #18 (1960), as reprinted in Superman Family #179 (1976)
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Labels:
Jimmy Olsen,
Lois Lane,
Perry White,
Silver Age,
Superman
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