From Superman #372 (1982)
Showing posts with label Future Sports. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Future Sports. Show all posts
Monday, April 10, 2017
Manic Monday--The Future Of Sports...?
Someone had best get cracking...
...there's only 4 years to invent "Space-Ball," let alone set up leagues, and put domes over our cities to flash the scores on, and...
From Superman #372 (1982)
From Superman #372 (1982)
Friday, August 3, 2012
Friday Night Fights--Dream Team Style!!
We have Olympic fever here at Slay Monstrobot!!
I mean, were else can you get teams deliberately throwing badminton matches, officials fixing boxing matches, whiners accusing winners of doping...all in the name of flag-waving nationalism?!? And don't forget...horse dancing is a sport!!
Anyway, for reasons that cannot be adequately explained, basketball is a summer sport for the Olympics, so we also get to hear great gnashing of teeth when the U.S. team doesn't win by enough, and sniping from former Dream Teamers that this incarnation isn't very good, kvetching about who should and shouldn't have made them team...seriously, when you're a Monstrobot, this kind of evil is a once-every-four-year treat!!
But, this is also a Friday, and we have Friday Night Fights to worry about. So, in keeping with the Olympic spirit, we have to ask the sporting question: what will Olympic basketball be like, oh, 88 years from now?
Oh, yes, Deathball!!
In this game, it's the Earth team, led by LG-3, versus the aliens from Bellatrix!!
But LG-3 is informed just before the game that retirement is being forced upon him by the owners. Still, LG-3 is not going quietly into that good night:
And just so you gentle readers can understand how damaging basketball can be in 2100:
So it's the tip-off!!
Oh, that had to hurt!!
OUCH!!
He's giving 110%!!
He doesn't know the meaning of the word quit!
Yee haw!!
But the Bellatrix aren't going to stand there and take it...
Take that, team that dares to be from elsewhere!!
Of course, LG-3 couldn't take them all by himself...
But he should be happy, knowing that his death changed basketball forever:
Spacebooger would accept Deathball if LeBron were playing on the losing side...
The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat are brought to by Bill Mohalley and Nicola Cuti (story) and Dick Giordano (art) in Eerie #88 (1977)
Now is the time for you to vote for me, because like gymnastics or synchronized swimming, winners should be judged by arbitrary subjective standards. And I can spread the graft around as any Azerbaijan boxing federation...
I mean, were else can you get teams deliberately throwing badminton matches, officials fixing boxing matches, whiners accusing winners of doping...all in the name of flag-waving nationalism?!? And don't forget...horse dancing is a sport!!
Anyway, for reasons that cannot be adequately explained, basketball is a summer sport for the Olympics, so we also get to hear great gnashing of teeth when the U.S. team doesn't win by enough, and sniping from former Dream Teamers that this incarnation isn't very good, kvetching about who should and shouldn't have made them team...seriously, when you're a Monstrobot, this kind of evil is a once-every-four-year treat!!
But, this is also a Friday, and we have Friday Night Fights to worry about. So, in keeping with the Olympic spirit, we have to ask the sporting question: what will Olympic basketball be like, oh, 88 years from now?
In this game, it's the Earth team, led by LG-3, versus the aliens from Bellatrix!!
But LG-3 is informed just before the game that retirement is being forced upon him by the owners. Still, LG-3 is not going quietly into that good night:
But the Bellatrix aren't going to stand there and take it...
Of course, LG-3 couldn't take them all by himself...
The thrill of victory and the agony of defeat are brought to by Bill Mohalley and Nicola Cuti (story) and Dick Giordano (art) in Eerie #88 (1977)
Now is the time for you to vote for me, because like gymnastics or synchronized swimming, winners should be judged by arbitrary subjective standards. And I can spread the graft around as any Azerbaijan boxing federation...
Monday, July 16, 2012
Manic Monday--Meanwhile, On The Ocho...
This may treated as a joke...
...but if this were real sport, I would totally watch the hell out of it!!
From Archie's Joke Book Magazine #156 (1971)
From Archie's Joke Book Magazine #156 (1971)
Saturday, April 28, 2012
THIS REALLY HAPPENED--Kill-Derby!!
As we deal with a wave of violence in sports today, we find that, as per usual, Jack Kirby predicted it all. Or, as we like to say in these parts:
THIS REALLY HAPPENED!!!!!!
Yes, Captain America had to participate in...KILL-DERBY!!
Why? Well, it's a long story (MadBomb, anyone?), but the bottom line is:
True, we cannot let the shield participate in something that will make it a symbol of shame...uhh, please nobody tell 1976 Cap about Civil War, OK??
So, to rescue the shield, Cap and Falcon have to join on of the teams in the sport of the future (no, not kickboxing):
Motorized skateboards? OK, but what else does this sport bring us?
So, yeah, lots of rampant devices, and death, and cheating. Still...
...Kill-Derby is still slightly less violent than the NHL...
Yes, Captain America had to participate in...KILL-DERBY!!
Why? Well, it's a long story (MadBomb, anyone?), but the bottom line is:
So, to rescue the shield, Cap and Falcon have to join on of the teams in the sport of the future (no, not kickboxing):
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Friday, October 23, 2009
Friday Night Fights--Anbo-Jytsu Style!!
In the future, you see, sports will be really crazy. And not just Rollerball-crazy:
Aeroball, brought to by England, inventor of such exciting sports as...cricket? Ummm, snooker? Action-packed golf!! All supplanted in 2050 by...Aeroball!!
And today is the Big Game!! That's right, it's the Harlem Heroes vs. the Greek City Gladiators in the preliminary round of the World Aeroball Championship!!
And how does your typical Aeroball game go?? A little something like this:
Seriously, any sport that features 80mph kung fu drop kicks is all right with me, and all right with Spacebooger, too!!
From 2000 A.D. #1 (1977), written by Tom Tully and Pat Mills, drawn by Dave Gibbons.
BONUS: Why are "future sports" on sci-fi comics/shows always so lame? For anyone who wants to see the true sport of the future, and "the ultimate evolution of the martial arts," view below...
And today is the Big Game!! That's right, it's the Harlem Heroes vs. the Greek City Gladiators in the preliminary round of the World Aeroball Championship!!
And how does your typical Aeroball game go?? A little something like this:
From 2000 A.D. #1 (1977), written by Tom Tully and Pat Mills, drawn by Dave Gibbons.
BONUS: Why are "future sports" on sci-fi comics/shows always so lame? For anyone who wants to see the true sport of the future, and "the ultimate evolution of the martial arts," view below...
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