Oh, So *That's* How He Tells Them Apart!!

Notes:

**Now we now why they always wear hats!

**There's no story based on this--it's just a cover gag. But if I were writing this story, Donald will have gotten the wrong inital shaved into the wrong head. Hilarity ensues.

This is why I'm not allowed to write comics books.

**Given his frequent lapses into temper tantrums at the drop of a hat, Donald Duck is really the last person I'd want to be my barber.

**Umm...Carl Barks realizes that ducks don't have hair, right? Right?

From Walt Disney's Comics And Stories #169 (1954)

Why Donald Duck Would Make A Terrible Super-Villain!

If you were ever worried that Donald Duck would take his awesome skills to the dark side...

...I think the Disneyverse is quite safe from any threat of Captain Duck-A-Rang.

And yes, of course photographs in a funny animal realm can capture speed lines. Duh.

From Dell Four Color #531 (1954)

Still, It Makes More Sense Than Bitcoin

Donald has to decide to play a sly prank on Uncle Scrooge, which has absolutely no chance of backfiring!

And the inevitable result of last week's elections?

Well, there is a reason Scrooge became so rich in the first place.

And after a canny series of cunning transactions, within a few hours, he is "rich" again!

And when Donald gets home...

The moral of the story--don't play jokes on Scrooge McDuck!!

From Dell Four Color #456 (1953)

Uncle Scrooge And The Hidden Cultural Crisis

So, the other day, I received my set of the first two volumes of Fantagraphics collection of Don Rosa's duck work...

...and when I opened the box to gaze upon my new treasure, one of my college-aged employees looked at it, and asked, "Who's Uncle Scrooge?"

WHAT.

THE.

HELL.



How is this even remotely possible?!?

This is a cultural emergency.

Forget anything else in your life.

This week, make it your job--your sacred quest--to inform people about Uncle Scrooge.

Find a child. Find a co-worker. Find a Gen-Xer or a millennial or whatever they call the kids these days. And tell them about Uncle Scrooge. Show them this video:


Don't let the legacy of Scrooge McDuck fade away.

Manic Mathmagic Monday Seventh Heaven--Greedy Capitalists Are Bad At Math, Apparently!

So, having learned all about the glories of math while in Mathmagic Land, has Donald discovered a way out from Uncle Scrooge's cruel usury?

No, Donald, no!

So Donald had a house worth thousands, and he was going deeply into debt to take 89¢ loans from Scrooge? Three words, Donald: home equity loans.

But surely McDuck is too canny a businessduck to fall this old trick!

Donald, you let the old bastard off way too easily. Waaaayy too easily.

From Four Color 1051 (1959)

Manic Mathmagic Monday Six Pack--It Don't Mean A Thing If You Ain't Got That Swing!

The Spirit Of Mathematics has told Donald that math is the basis of music, but the Donald is skeptical. Time for another time travel lesson!

But how did the Pythogoreans implement this?

Donald's right--it don't mean a thing, if it ain't got that swing!!

Oh, great, now Donald has introduced the Greeks to the corruption of foul boogie-woogie music and idiotic jitterbugging!! Somebody better tell The Maestro!!

From Four Color #1051 (1959)

Manic Mathmagic Monday Plead The Fifth--How To Get America's Math Scores Up!

How do you get the young men of America to pay attention in math class?

Frame your lessons the way Hugh Hefner would!

Ummm...is their anything more uncomfortable than an anthropomorphic duck lusting heartily after a human woman in front of his nephews? But I guess it's OK, because MATH!!!!

From Four Color #1051 (1959)

Manic Mathmagic Monday Fourth Down--Classical Cultures Were Dumb!

Look, it's one thing to rag on cavemen for the lack of mathematical acumen...

But Mathmagic Land is not content to criticize history's early losers. No, sir, they're willing to stock it to the big guys, like the Egyptians:

And don't get them started on the Romans!!

Donald Duck In Mathmagic Land: Willing to take on history's sacred cows!!

From Four Color #1051 (1959)

Manic Mathmagic Monday Triple Overtime--So Simple Even A Caveman Could Do It?

Donald Duck is in Mathmagic Land, getting a lesson from "the spirit of mathematics":

Yes, let's see how cavemen dealt with math:

Well, that didn't go very well.

I think that stuck-up caveman lawyer owes Geico an apology...I sure wouldn't want these guys involved with buying insurance...

From Four Color #1051 (1959)

Manic Mathmagic Monday Bonus--Be Careful Of What You Wish For!!

Donald Duck is trying to figure a way out of the insane financial hole he has gotten himself into ny borrowing 89¢ from Uncle Scrooge!

So desperate is Donald, that he'll take the dreaded step of...

...using math!!!

But some people just don't have the math bone...

NO!!!! Never say something like that out loud!! You never know what could happen!!

Uh-oh...

Oh, dear? What shall Donald find in Mathmagic Land? Stay tuned for more...

From Four Color #1051 (1959)