Madonna - Angel (Sire)

Bar the horrible "Material Girl", all of Madonna's songs sound basically the same; trashy dance music with simple catchy tunes and disposable trite lyrics. "Angel" is absolutely typical and I love it. Enjoy it while you can - next year she's bound to go terribly adult, wearing long sequinned dresses and singing Lionel Richie ballads. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

The Boomtown Rats - A Hold Of Me (Mercury)

Muddy, mouldy progression of tired ideas hung, drawn and quartered by Bob's tenth-rate Jagger. The Rats always dealt in back cliches, but at their best - "Rat Trap", "Mondays" - they managed to find a song from somewhere. They don't here, and only Geldof's new found celebrity status can do anything to save this. (Jim Reid, Record Mirror, February 2, 1985)

Poor old Bob Geldof. He does a brilliant job as the main force behind Band Aid, sacrificing months of his professional and private life and all some people can say is that he's doing it to resuscitate his own career. And it's just not true. Mind you, if it was, it wouldn't make any difference - this new Boomtown Rats single is too unspeakably ordinary to be saved by any amount of publicity. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

Howard Jones - Things Can Only Get Better (WEA)

Years from now, when the '80s are but a memory, I will still detest Howard's "New Song" as much as the day I first heard it, and squirm every time anyone mentions 'mental chains'. But ever since that rather ropey opener, he's been making increasingly likeable pop songs. This is no exception. The bubbling uptempo arrangement (especially good on the 12") masks a rather slight main tune, but the real killer bit is the chant. For the next two months the milkman, the hairdresser, the window cleaner and just about everyone else important in your life will be driving you barmy with their out-of-tune renditions of "woah-oh woah-oh-oh woah-oh, woah-oh, woah-oh-oh, woah-oh". A massive hit. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

Song construction kit: take two Squezy bottles, some sticky back paper, an outtake from Finland's entry in last year's Eurovision Song Contest and a smidgeon of garden fence philosophy. Then, get in some real fine musicians, beef it up a bit and smile. (Jim Reid, Record Mirror, February 2, 1985)

Never having succumbed to the Howie `I'm just an ordinary guy with a daft haircut' charm, this one totally passes me by. He sounds as optimistic as ever (how can anyone be that chirpy?), but has dropped the synth dependence for bass and brass and a chorus of "woh woh woah woah woh" which gets more than a touch irritating. 'Things. . .' bounces along merrily enough but there's nothing to convince me that I'd like to get to know him well. (Karen Swayne, No 1, February 2, 1985)

The Fink Brothers - Mutants In Mega-City One (Zarjazz)

A fantasy piece based on the 2000 A.D. comic (see page 16) which finds Suggs and Carl from Madness being very indulgent. Not being au fait with 'the story so far', I find it all a bit confusing - amidst lots of chaotic funkiness we meet about 137 characters in 3 minutes. Nevertheless I can't stop singing the bit which goes 'When mutants are waiting on every corner/ Remember to call for Judge Dredd', much to the amusement of my friends. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

The strange world of The Fink Brothers is dominated by Judge Dredd. He's the enemy who, along with the other norms, won't allow mutants like The Brothers into Mega-City One. They're so upset they've written a song about it. Confused? You won't be if you're a fan of the comic strip in 2000AD. You might be if you're a Madness fan though, because in amongst the garbled funk are Suggs and Carl as you've never heard them before. This is a truly weird record, which you'd do well to learn to love.. . mutes can do very nasty things to norms. (Karen Swayne, No 1, February 2, 1985)

Carl and Suggs leave the mature mellow of Madness for a real tour into teen takeaway. Thus you get a pleasingly ham exposition of hip hop cliches set in praise of their favourite comic, 2000 AD. Everything but the kitchen sink and not bad on it, save the, laboured chorus. (Jim Reid, Record Mirror, February 2, 1985)

Killing Joke - Love Like Blood (EG)

At last! After five years making exactly the same record - deafening drums and guitar, a tuneless vocal - Killing Joke have actually written a song. It's not a very good one, and unfortunately the swish production does let us confirm for the first time what a load of twaddle their lyrics are. Nevertheless, it's a start. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

Killing Joke used to make great records. Then singer Jaz Coleman took an extended holiday in Iceland and things fell apart. "Love Like Blood" starts with a big build-up, but then goes on to . . . not much. It all sounds far too smooth and compact. They just can't seem to capture the feeling anymore. (Ursula Kenny, No 1, February 9, 1985)

Dire Straits - Money For Nothing (Phonogram)

The first half minute of this sounds nothing like Dire Straits, being full of bubbling synthesisers and falsetto vocals. Then Mark Knopfler gets going and it's back to the normal soporific stuff as he sings a truly tragic tale of rock stars who get "money for nothing and chicks for free". Is there anything more boring than pop stars writing about the endless trials and tribulations of being a pop star? (Yes actually. The whole country going bananas about Bruce Springsteen - Ed) (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

Red Box - Saskatchewan (WEA)

If I said this was absolutely saturated in wimpy sentimentality and sounded like a cross between Simon & Garfunkel and Julian Lennon, you'd know "Saskatchewan" was 'deeply sensitive' and rather boring, right? Wrong. Though I've no idea why they're singing about a Canadian town (something to do with North American Indians, I suspect), this has a lovely tune and may well be a hit. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

Sharpe And Numan - Change Your Mind (Polydor)

So here we have it, one of the most unlikely partnerships in pop music: steel-voiced, steel-faced Numan with furry dice Shakatak supremo Sharpe. I don't care much for what either do alone so I expected this to be doubly abominable. Not so. In fact it's rather good. The most amazing thing is that for the first time ever Gary actually sings a tune. Previously he's only ever mumbled in a robotic monotone so understandably the first few lines are a bit painful - but by the end he's really getting the hang of it. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

The most unlikely pairing so far this year features Bill Sharpe, best known for his keyboard playing with snooze specialists Shakatak, and Gary Numan. The combination is bizarre, but curiously effective. Gazza sounds as nasal and distanced as ever but there's more of a tune than on his recent outings. Can't wait to see 'em on TOTP either. Will Gary have talked Bill into trying out his new true blue lipstick? (Karen Swayne, No 1, February 2, 1985)

Shakatak leave wine bar, beam up to Biggles' futuristic bi-plane and tap out somethin' for Gary to get all nasal about. Not the next Chas 'n' Dave. (Jim Reid, Record Mirror, February 2, 1985)

Phil Collins - Sussudio (Virgin)

It must have happened like this. Mr Collins, famous for his heart-rending ballads like "Against All Odds", was idly tuning his kid's transistor radio looking for Radio 2 when he caught just a snippet of a trendy electrofunk dance record. "I can do that," he thought. So he did. Only thing was, he'd heard a really bad (not 'baaad' bad, just lousy) example of it - no tune, cluttered arrangement, silly title. Still, all credit to him for copying it so well. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, January 31, 1985)

Note: Later interviews confirmed that Prince's "1999" was an inspiration for this one. And that the word 'sussudio' was made up as a generic name with the intention of replacing it later, but it stuck around.

The Damned - Shadow Of Love (MCA)

Back in 1976 The Damned, one of the first punk groups, used to really live up to their name. These days though they've mellowed out and just make jokey, vaguely pleasant pop songs like "Shadow Of Love" which they're promoting with a massive 40-date tour, as advertised on the sleeve. Myself, I'd rather go and see Bruce Springsteen.(Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

Toyah - Soul Passing Through Soul (Portrait)

Q: What do you get when you cross Toyah in her Bowie mood (circa "Heroes") and Sheena Easton's old producer? A: Two things. One is difficulty stifl­ing those yawns, and secondly, something you wouldn't want to tread in while walking across a cow field.(Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, June 22, 1985)

I'm sorry to say it but in the whole history of popular music I can think of no-one who I've liked less than Toyah (except, possibly, The Art Company with their summer hit, "Susanna" last year - but at least they had the decency to fade into obscurity). So I'm not the best person to ask for an objective opinion on her new single, which is a bit similar to David Bowie's "Heroes". For the record though, I don't like it. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

Kirsty MacColl - He's On The Beach (Stiff)

A sad tale from Kirsty about a boy who takes off on holiday and ends up in Australia. Still, he's happy there. Kirsty will be happy too when the single marches up the charts. It's even better than "A New England", more bouncy and with a chorus that stays in your brain after just one listen. (Anne Lambert, No 1, June 15, 1985)

Even though Kirsty wrote this herself it sounds very like her last single, Billy Bragg's "A New England" - lots of shiny guitars above which a million Kirsty MacColls breathlessly sing the tune. I just don't quite understand why she's bothered to write a song about an old drinking partner who's gone to Australia, spends all his time on the beach and isn't coming back. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

The lovely Kirsty is always worth a lot of anybody's time. Her appreciation of the finer aspects of pop construction are enough to warm even the coldest discaphile's heart. All the usual ingredients are there - sometime bittersweet but ultimately optimistic lyric, hefty, pacey backbeat, just the right amount of memorable jangling and those trebly harmonised vocals. A tribute to lost love? A yearning for sunnier climes? A summer hit? All these, and more. (Graham K Smith, Record Mirror, June 15, 1985)

Dead Or Alive - In Too Deep (CBS)

Pete Burns and Dead Or Alive drop the incessant beat and concentrate on their melody here and the result is most pleasant. Instant pop like this is a hard act to master but Burns keeps the song simple and the harmonies tight, even adding a shade of The Beach Boys to his measured vocals. Bound to go hurtling into the charts. DOA's best yet. (Max Bell, No 1, June 22, 1985)

Without a doubt this is DOA's best so far - but that's not saying much. It's identikit pop, like most of the other success stories of the past two years; it takes a lot of Motown devices and tricks, throws them into a Human League/disco blender, adds a dash of sparkle and Robert's your father's brother. I'd be more enthusiastic if I didn't have the nagging feeling that I've heard the chorus before. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, June 22, 1985)

The Editor said I'd be sacked if I was nasty about this one. Luckily it's quite good. Slightly slower and a bit more sensitive than the excellent "You Spin Me Round" and the terrible "Lover Come Back To Me", it finds Pete Burns complaining about being too involved with a lover who's never satisfied. Maybe another nose job would do the trick? (Report to my office. - Ed) (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

R.I.P. Pete Burns August 5, 1959 - October 23, 2016

Hipsway - The Broken Years (Mercury)

This, the first single by four blokes from Glasgow, is simply the best record I've heard for months. There's nothing startlingly new or original about it - it's just a really good rock/funk song (imagine a punchy mixture of The Kane Gang and The Smiths) sung brilliantly by the deep-voiced Graham Skinner. If all their songs are this excellent we're going to hear an awful lot more of them. Single Of The Fortnight. (Chris Heath, Smash Hits, June 19, 1985)

Come on down, the price is right. It's summer and time to play 'Great White Hope' for 'Big Money'. Hipsway, like Coronation Street's Bet Lynch, show their (soul) roots but make up for their inelegance by a brassy attitude. (Mike Gardner, Record Mirror, June 22, 1985)