F is for Front Garden/lawn

The front part of our garden is my next task! On Sunday after asking questions and reading up on the matter it became apparent that our ornamental cherry tree is dead. I can't remember if there were any leaves on it last year, but there aren't any this year and the branches keep snapping off in the wind. The blue tits nest here every year so we'll have to think of something to replace it. The lifespan of such a tree would appear to be between 20 and 25 years. I have seen 1950's photographs of the front garden and bold as brass is a young ornamental cherry tree - so I think it has done well. Jon will be dealing with it - logs etc but we need to think about the blue tits.

 

 

 

Looking out from the kitchen window in the middle of the front hedge is where the original gate was to the house. Our house is an ex-police house so the gate would lead visitors to the police office situated at the back of the house - now part of our lounge.

 

 

 

We had the turf laid to make it more lawn mower friendly.

 

Jon made the bird bath for mum. This area is now one I am making into a little piece of paradise for bird visitors. We aren't sure what the "trees" are but they are an ideal place to hang feeders etc. Notice Eva making an appearance!

 

 

 

The pond at the far right of the photograph is a project all to itself. Originally we had it built for the geese. It's a sloping gradient to a depth of about 50cm. I have been doing my research about ponds and thanks to an Alan Titmarsh programme I found out we don't need a pump, self oxygenating plants will keep the water clear and we will add various plants. I am experimenting with a small pond idea in a little barrel. All seem to be getting along fine. I'll keep a close look out and if all continues well we will use these plants in the large pond.

 

 

 

 

In front of the bird interest area is the area where the gate was and this is what I want to transform.

 

The borders want sorting too - I am going to be very busy.

 



 

 

To the left of the area is a holly "tree". It was the same height as the hedge some 23 years ago but as the birds love it so much we have allowed it to grow. 

 

I am not sure how long this is going to take me - but I am on the case. Being realistic I may have something to share by the letter L...could be "L for Look at this then!"

Watch this space!
My F take on the ABC of the Nesbitt garden projects!

Mother's Day.

Every Friday I take my MIL shopping. Today I had an overwhelming feeling of grief for my own mum. What I would do to be able to take her shopping, she loved it.
Not so long ago I wrote about mum here and as I re-read the post a few minutes ago I couldn't really alter anything about it.....I miss my mum and always will. Yet I feel her presence around me - certainly I do not have to look far without seeing an object or reminder of mum.
Today I will take Mavis to the library where an old college friend of mine works. We always have a laugh when we talk about days gone by - carefree days of 16 year olds travelling to college on a bus. I must tell you about some of our adventures one time.......there are quite a few over the 2 year period.
After the library is the supermarket experience. No doubt I will bump into people I have known for years and yes we will share laughs again......part and parcel of surrounding oneself with people of the same disposition eh?
Once the shopping is packed into the car we will have a spot of lunch. A new cafe has opened in Guisborough and I hear they do a good soup.....off to try.

Sunday - Mother's Day itself and the family are here for lunch.
We have a new Marks & Spencer's food outlet here and I am absolutely bowled over by the quality and variety of what they have to offer.....
so the menu looks like this....

Melon starter

 

Turkey Crown with Pork Sage & Onion Stuffing

Porcetta Pork Belly

Roast Potatoes & Parsnips ala mrs nesbitt's faffing about

Mashed Potato (Adored and worshipped by nephews)

Yorkshire Puddings

Vegetable Bake

Sprouts, Brocolli & Spring Greens

Gravy

 

Desert

Peach Melba gateaux provided by SIL!

 

Should be a good one!

We will be raising a glass to mum too.

 

Enjoy the weekend - here's to mum's everywhere.

By the way - received £10 discount from M&S due to a technical hitch when ordering! Good one eh?

For mum, with love.

Each Mother's Day I wonder how I am going to deal with it. I try to be pro-active and busy myself with organising something family based as Jon's mum;s birthday normally falls round about the same time This year however, with Easter being when it is, Mavis's birthday was 2 weeks ago and we had the family here for Sunday lunch. Today we are taking my MIL out for Sunday lunch.

When my mum was alive, we often went for Sunday dinner, she loved cooking for us both especially as we had full-time demanding jobs. 

On one particular significant Sunday, Jon and I had gone to mum's for Sunday lunch. As always after we had washed up I would take mum to the local supermarket for her weekly shop.

On returning to the car I helped mum into the passenger seat with my usual joke..

"Do you want a hand up love" I would say as I patted her bum when she was getting into the car.

She always laughed, and this day was no different.

But as she turned to look at me, laughing I was shocked to look and see how old and frail she seemed.

As I walked round to the driver's seat I had to fight back the tears and put on a brave face.

On our way home I shared what had happened with Jon. That night I had the most vivid, graphic dream about mum's funeral. I awoke distressed and upset. The following day, Monday I went round to mums. Had a cup of tea and a chat.

The following day, Tuesday was a teacher training day and after school I popped in to see mum. She told me she had not been feling well, chest pains. I told her to make an appointment with the doctor.

Later that night she phoned to say she had made an appointment with the doctor,for the following day, Wednesday. Jon was on early shift so he said he would take her.

We were laughing with mum, as she said people might think Jon was her toyboy!

At about 3am I awoke with a start.

Jon awoke too.

I told him I had a void in my soul....as simple and as graphic as that!

He told me I was worrying about mum and he would ask mum to come and live with us.

I said mum would be very touched by the thought, but she was independent and would prefer to stay at home.

What I said went something like this...

"We will have to accept it Jon that one day I will be teaching away at school and there will be a message from the office to say there is a phone call for me. It will be Phyllis, mum's neighbour saying the curtains are closed.

I will go round and mum will have died."

I didn't sleep much after that.

The next day I went to school and Viv, the school caretaker asked how mum was.

I told her what I had told Jon , practically word for word.

And so the day started as normal.

Registration, assembly, teaching, I forget what now.

At breaktime I was just sending the class out when the school secretary came into my classroom to say there was a phone call for me.

I didn't give it a second thought, but as I was going into the office I asked Jan who it was on the phone,

"Phyllis" she replied.

My hand turned into lead and I could barely open the door, let alone pick up the receiver.

"Denise, your mum's curtains are still closed and it is 10.30."

I knew.

The headteacher, Christine said she would drive me to mum's, it was only a few miles from school.

When we arrived I let myself in and there was mum, she had died in her sleep on 7th September, on what would have been Dad's birthday.

A week later, at mum's funeral I chose this poem to be shared.

From Ye Wearie Wayfarer

Question not, but live and labour
Till yon goal be won,
Helping every feeble neighbour,
Seeking help from none.
Life is mostly froth and bubble,
Two things stand like stone.
Kindness in another's trouble,
Courage in your own.

Adam Lindsay Gordon.

I am surrounded by so many things which were mums and in fact are part of our everyday routines and practices.

As a child, growing up there was one thing I always wanted, to make mum proud of me.

Life hadn't been good for mum and I, but mum always put me first.

The photograph I have chosen shows the love and pride in mum's face.

It was taken at her surprise birthday party at home, November 2nd 1986.

I am handing over the cake. As per usual, in our family, somebody missed my head off!

But that is unimportant, it is mum's face which says it all!

Mum always told me, that in the event of her death there would be a letter for me.

The day she died, as I sat with her waiting for the doctor I went to the place she had told me about and sure enough, there was the letter.

It stated how much mum loved me, was so happy for Jon and I, and we were to remember her with smiles, not tears.

P is for presentation.

When I am working on a commission the most exciting part to me is the presentation – the packaging of the product as I want the client to be excited when the parcel arrives on the doorstep. Whilst I am aware of avoiding elaborate expensive materials I do want to give a hint of what lies inside. I change my themes regularly, but right now this is the label I have designed and indeed are using. I take my parcels to the village post office and it has become a ritual now for the ladies in the shop to comment on the parcels – they say my parcels brighten up their dreary days of plain brown paper parcels!

 

 

My current commission is for some Thank You cards to be sent out by my client to friends and family who offered and sent cards of sympathy following the death of a close family member.

This is the image I was inspired by…

 

These are the cards I created.

 

I am looking for a nice quotation…..any ideas?

Today would have been Mum’s birthday…..Happy Birthday Mum! xxxx

J is for Journey!

~ Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome. ~ (Arthur Ashe)

 

This morning I had a fantastic time on the beach with Freida. As usual we had it all to ourselves and as the sun was warm and the air was still it was a fantastic space to be. Whenever I am near the sea I always think of the times I was away from home and missed the open coast so much. I returned home when my Dad died and I knew the time had come for me to return home and look after mum. I will never forget the journey home as I knew my life was about to change, but little did I know how much. A few months later I met Jon. A holiday had been planned with friends to France for 5 weeks. It was during this time I realised I had met “Mr Right”. The journey home was a very significant one as I knew it would be the last journey I would make , as a single woman. We were married a few months later.

What significant journeys have you made in your time?

The Journey

One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice --
though the whole house began to tremble
and you felt the old tug at your ankles.
"Mend my life!" each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do, though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers at the very foundations,
though their melancholy was terrible.
It was already late enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen branches and stones.

But little by little, as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly recognized as your own,
that kept you company as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do the only thing you could do --
determined to save
the only life you could save.

~ Mary Oliver ~

Friday + Special!

Friday 55 Flash Fiction is brought to you by G-man (Mr Knowitall). The idea is you write a story in exactly 55 words. If you want to take part pop over and let G-man know when you've posted your 55. Here is mine for this week!

Missing

Gentle Man kind blue eyes wearing a loving broad smile.

Smart appearance, tweed jacket and matching hat.

Interests include his family, home and garden.

Endearing sense of humour and a very generous nature,

Looking after all around him.

Last seen August thirteenth nineteen eighty six

Answers to the name of John Henry Davison, Dad.

The greatest gift I ever received come from God, I call him Dad! - Anonymous

John Henry Davison came into my life when I was 7. Mum had just got a new job at the prestigious ICI, Wilton Training Centre. One of the Training officers was John Davison, or Jack as he was known. Mum was one of the secretaries. This was her first job following the harrowing divorce she had gone through, a visit from the bailiffs to strip the house we lived in, seizing goods to cover my biological father's bankrupted business debts, a nervous breakdown.

Mum borrowed the deposit for a small terraced house from her 2 brothers, Uncle Bob and Uncle Stan. It needed lots doing to it, including total rewiring. We all know how single women are targeted by unscrupulous workmen, and back in the 1960's things were no different, so Jack helped Mum by making sure she was not taken for a ride. He also helped where he could, as electrics were his "thing!"

The very first time he came to our house I was introduced to "Uncle Jack!" Years later I learned he had been more nervous than me! I was playing with my doll's house.
He spent time talking to me and I liked him. He re-wired my doll's house, I had the best there was! Independent switches in each of the rooms, as a real house would.

Over the years a friendship developed and he would visit us every Saturday. It was quite a treck for him as he did not drive and travelled from just outside Guisborough.

Mum eventually introduced him to her own parents.
My Grandad, a man of few words took him out for a walk! He wanted to know his intentions as Mum had been through so much.
Jack assured him he had her and mine best interests at heart.
Grandad was re-assured and a great friendship was kindled between them.

On one of his visits as Jack sat with Nana who was quite ill. Nana drew him close and asked him to promise he would look after Madge and Denise....he promised.
On June 17th, 1970, Nana died.
On November 1st Uncle Jack and mum were married, the day before mum's birthday.

We moved to a bungalow and after a couple of years we all moved to Guisborough,
Dad's home. Mum and I loved this change although by this time I was at University.

Mum and Dad were both still working at ICI. Dad had a very stressful job and in 1983 he suffered a massive heart attack. It resulted in him having to stop work.
In those days ICI was one of the best emloyers, with very good benefits, both Dad and Mum left with "Golden Handshakes", mum deciding to leave in order to ensure Dad had the rest he was to need.

Happy with their bungalow in Guisborough, they bought a static caravan at Rosedale Abbey. They loved to visit and stay whenever they had the time. Infact, the photograph above was indeed taken in the caravan, by mum.

On the morning of August 13th 1986, whilst staying at the caravan, Dad told mum he would prefer go home. He wasn't feeling very well. They had planned on going to Danby Country Show, one of their all time favourites.

They packed up and set off for home. It would have been a very busy day on the roads, due to holiday traffic, -the Whitby to Guisborough Road in particular!

As the car passed Gisborough Hall, Dad brought the car to a stop and slumped forward.
He had died, literaly at the wheel.

I was teaching in Nottingham at the time.
I received the news later that afternoon and returned home the following day.

This was to be a turning point in my life. I was to return home and look after mum.
I had a fantastic relationship with Dad, he was indeed my Dad.

Notice how he suddenly evolved as Dad from Uncle Jack? It was the same in our relationship.
I don't know when it happened, it just did. One day I just called him Dad!
Dad recounted the event to mum..he had cried at the time, privately, with pride and love.
I often sit in Dad's chair and remember him....I will take great comfort in doing that today, August 13th 2010!



When Dad was at school he learned the poem " Meg Merilles" off by heart. This he would recite when his teacher asked the class to stand up, one by one and sing. Dad was incredibly shy as well as tone deaf, this was his contribution. he often recited this, infact at the drop of a hat!

Here is the poem in it's original form, for Dad!

Meg Merrilies

Old Meg she was a gypsy; And liv'd upon the moors:
Her bed it was the brown heath turf, And her house was out of doors.
Her apples were swart blackberries, Her currants, pods o' broom;
Her wine was dew of the wild white rose, Her book a church-yard tomb.

Her brothers were the craggy hills, Her sisters larchen trees;
Alone with her great family She liv'd as she did please.
No breakfast had she many a morn, No dinner many a noon,
And 'stead of supper she would stare Full hard against the moon.

But every morn, of woodbine fresh She made her garlanding,
And every night the dark glen yew She wove, and she would sing.
nd with her fingers old and brown She plaited mats o' rushes,
And gave them to the cottagers She met among the bushes.

Old Meg was brave as Margaret Queen, And tall as Amazon:
An old red blanket cloak she wore, A chip hat had she on.
God rest her aged bones somewhere — She died full long agone!

John Keats