Dear Santa…

The other day I was hanging with the family in the pool and the girls wanted to talk about Disney. Yes, we are indeed THAT family. The family who’s 9 year old is about to take her 11th trip to the World. Trust me. My kids could plan your entire trip, guide you around the entire Disney World property without a map, and tell you all of the best sit down restaurants and which has a good lobster bisque. Really. We are a little bit psycho about planning our trips… down to the very last minute detail. Planning is half the fun when it comes to Disney.  We even plan to have “unplanned time”… seriously. I’m not very anal about many things, but a trip to Disney World just puts me in a tizzy.

As the girls started talking about what we were going to do and where we were going to stay, the BIG question came up…

How on Earth is Santa going to visit us at Disney World?  

Let me preface this by saying that I generally tell my kids the truth. When my oldest was 5 and asked what a period was, I told her.  I usually answer the questions. I do not give them more information than they need. I give them enough information to satisfy their curiosity and then move on… I just don’t believe in lying to them…  Except when it comes to the magic of being a child.

Mommy?

Yes, Jillian.

Is Santa real?

Do you get real gifts?

Yeah.

Well then, what do you think?

I think you and daddy are Santa.

Shows what you know, kid. Daddy’s cheap. He wouldn’t buy you extra presents just to pretend to be Santa.

Oh.

Yeah.

Well, then how’s Santa going to know which hotel room is ours?

Abby – Duh. He’s MA-GIC…

Ooohhh.  Yeah… MA-GIC… Well, I still think he needs a sign or sumthin…just to be sure he finds us…

Abby – and maybe some extra special Disney cookies… like chocolate dipped rice crispie Mickey heads.

We can get a Santa Stop Here sign and put it outside of our door. I’m sure that will work.

And then he can leave us lots of gifts! …

You know what’s really cool to do? Ask Santa to surprise you. If you don’t ask for anything and just tell him to surprise you, you’ll usually get something totally awesome… *cough*likeafriggintriptoDisneyWorld*cough*

Abby & Jillian – AWESOME!!!!

I said I didn’t lie… on important things… but I will work them for as long as I possibly can.

So who has some suggestions for small packable and easily concealed awesome Christmas presents for a 6 year old? 9 is getting a Kindle…

 

Last day of freedom

 

Friday was our last weekday before school started back. Levi had Friday off so we decided to spend the day in the city. Did you know that if you live in the suburbs of Houston, one really never does need to go into the actual city? At least, we don’t. But it was a special sort of day and we didn’t want to waste it by doing laundry and other such nonsense.

We took the kids to the Natural History museum.

RAWR.

Jillian loved the fossils….

 

And Daddy loved the fossils…

 

But Abby sat still, without fidgeting, without blinking, without breathing for 15 minutes trying to get the butterflies to land on her…

I’ve never seen her so still, so quiet, so frozen before… she didn’t even smile while I was giggling at her for being so still and so quiet and so frozen! She took her butterfly enticement very very seriously…

And I had a ball taking pictures. I even got a really fun sun flare.

Beautiful endings

On Thursday, I proved that one can indeed live Murphy’s law. From an early morning PMS fueled rage because Walmart didn’t have what I needed (as usual), to construction crews cutting our neighborhood power line mid-day when it was 1000 degrees outside and I was just preparing to bake a cake for the next day’s teacher desert bar, to the same crew later cutting our gas main and trapping us into our neighborhood on the same evening our girls were due at Meet the teacher night… and trapping Jillian OUT of the neighborhood because she was at a friend’s house playing when it happened. It was a never ending awful sort of day.

After hiking a few miles in ridiculous heat we were able to escape our neighborhood and then hitch a ride to the school for the last 10 minutes of Meet the teacher. I got to explain to Jillian’s teacher that the lady who brought her was in fact NOT her mother, I was, and here’s your cute little box of goodies that Jillian is going to be so mad about not delivering herself. I was sweaty and stinky but I put on my very best “trying not to be humiliated that I’m meeting my kids teachers looking like this” face and got it done.

So there.

At school, after finally retrieving Jillian, 1/2 of our neighborhood was milling around wondering if we were allowed to get back in, how to get back in, and who the heck had a car that so and so could hitch a ride in. We decided to table the idea of sitting in the heat and hit the neighborhood Mexican placed for margaritas instead. Truly,  tequila was the only thing left to have. It was far FAR beyond time for a drink. We hauled 25 people into the restaurant and sat and enjoyed ourselves for a few hours.

We had dinner with a few couples we knew, and met a few new similarly inconvenienced neighbors and let our kids eat loudly. We were all so exhausted from the day that we just didn’t even care.

Outside of the restaurant we even let our kids play on the statue… because usually, that’s SO NOT my kids playing around in and outside of restaurants… The sunset that evening was a gorgeous reminder that some days, you’ve just got to trudge through and get it done however you can and eventually…things do indeed get better.

Tunes

 

“Music is the art of thinking with sounds.”

Jules Combarieu

My estrogen levels must be extremely high today… This is the playlist I’ve got on. Can you guess it’s name? Come on… take a shot at it. 

Emo chick.

That is all.

Batshit crazy…

We interrupt the vacation posts with this crazy photo…

This little bugger just fell out of our patio table umbrella and scared the crap out of all of us. There may or may not have been cursing, and shivers, and general skeeved outedness involved.

Oh, and a chicka on Twitter thought baby bats were cute, so here’s a second shot of the nasty little thing… {shiver}

I’ll never read vampire smut the same way again….

Changes… They are a comin…

 

Last night in my insomnia induced stupor, I decided that I should make some changes to Magnolias and Sunshine… Because I’ve changed. Sort of. I still like to show off my kiddos, share fun stuff, and spout off at the mouth… Probably, because that’s just how I am… Probably, that will never have any hope of ever changing… Sorry Mom… The mouth stays ;-)

Over the past year and a half, I’ve discovered that we’ve moved to Stepford… You know, THE Stepford.

Where moms are in their Mercedes SUVs or their husband Porches in the school carline, they carry actual Hermes handbags into the dance studio, and they all run marathons. Seriously people. Marathons. All the time. And I’m sure they don’t EVER take off their stiletto tall boots. I could go on, but you get the picture. Stepford.

I have found some great friends. They have kept me from going stark raving mad in this place. But I’ve made a LOT of friends online as well. Sometimes I get giddy when they talk back… Some of them are famous :-) In my world at least. Probably it’s not stalking if they are following you on Twitter too. Probably none of them think I’m socially awkward either…

I am a friend person… I’ve gotta have them. I’ve gotta invite them over for drinks and food, because that’s just how I am. I’ve gotta share completely inappropriate information with them. I’ve gotta pretend that my Mom reads right through the TMI parts and just looks at her grandkids photos. I’ve also gotta pretend that she never shares this blog with family…

I WISH there was a way for me to invite some of my bloggy friends over for a drink, but until I figure that out, I’ll just drink my cocktail and Tweet with everyone else who’s Tipsy Tweeting. 

Here’s where you come in. I want MORE friends… Surely there are more “Me’s” living in a Stepford town with nothing better to do than read blogs that recommend trashy books and good wine… SURELY… And here’s how I’m gonna find you… For every 5 new followers… Real ones, who actually comment and talk back… I’m going to host a giveaway. I’m at 29 right now, and because I suck at math, I wont start until I get one new follower. It’s my blog, I can do whatever the hell I want.  

I’m generally unedited… because that’s how I am… No. Verbal. Filter. I’m sure I’ll offend many. I’m sure those people are all lying to themselves when they think they have no issues. I’ll show you mine, if you show me yours.

So get ready folks… I’m a little bit pissed that I feel lonely sometimes, and I’ve got a blog and I know how to use it.

Broken Crayons?

 

One of our Summer day activities…

Sort out your broken crayons by color:

 

Take silly macro shots trying to get a really cool picture for your blog:

Break crayons into smaller pieces and fill candy making moulds with sorted colors: 

Bake at 250 until the wax melts, then carefully place pan in fridge. 

Drink Kool-aid. Wait for wax to harden. 

Flip pan and pop out the coolest crayons your 5 year old will ever see!

Twinkle Toes

Rehearsal…

On With the SHOW!

The Itsy Bitsy Spider…

Check out their prop! Ahhhh!!!!!!

I Could’ve Danced All Night…

Broadway Baby!

Garden Fairies are REAL…

Painting

Here’s documented proof that I let my kids go wild, every now and then. This started out as painting a picture for Daddy for Father’s Day… morphed into splatter painting… and then by the time I grabbed my camera, they’d taken to painting their hands and feet. That’s why the art goes outside! :-)

Not for the Faint of Heart

OK, since I'm having everything from camera disk to photobucket problems, I thought I'd post a completely inappropriate video clip from the MTV movie awards last night.... Seriously... I *may* have peed just a little while watching this over and over on my DVR last night...

WARNING... NOT FOR THE YOUNGINS...



And as another warning... for anyone following my blog... you're inbox is gonna explode once I figure out my photo issues... I've been snapping pics like crazy!

Have you seen this???

This is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while... the older boy's voice is so cute, and Charlie's giggle at the end... Too Cute!

Looking at last year's outfit, made me wonder...

Where'd my baby go?

Mmmmm....

Cupcakes!

This is yet ANOTHER Miss Molly that I made for Jillian's birthday party at the Young Chefs Academy. They had such a wonderful time making their own pizza dough, then pizzas, then decorating their own cupcakes. I've never seen 5 year olds sit so still and quiet. They were soaking it all in! They'll all be wonderful chefs at home!





My little chef... all hearts, flowers, and rainbows for her!





Happy Birthday my schnookem's wookems!

Hammin it up

I couldn't help myself... The morning was to pretty, and she was so funny...

Cause I'm so Gangsta

Now many of you will remember me saying that I wouldn't post music... well, it's my blog, so get over it... I'll take it down after I get more posts in...

This song has me feeling so kick-ass on the eliptical. And as the whitest girl in the south, I have to say that I TOTALLY love Kanye. Yeah, he's my boy. I used to even have Golddigger as Levi's personal ringtone on my phone, until he called me while I was at a church meeting... ASK me how fast I ran then!

Anyway, this is how I roll... ;-) when I'm trying to get in just a few more minutes on the hated exercise machine. Doesn't it make you want to get your groove on? Oh yeah!

OK, so the player was even bugging me... go to iTunes and listen to Estelle and Kanye in American Boy... You'll see what I'm talking about.

A Walk in the park

Awesome tree tunnel on the walking trail to the park...

OK, so it was technically a walk to the park, but a walk all the same. I can't wait for Sister to come visit again... her kids would LOVE this park... and maybe if they go home and brag about it enough, Sister in Law will come visit with her little pumpkins too. :-) Hint Hint Hint... It's much bigger than the tot park by the house and has a huge grassy hilly area to run around on. SUCH fun! And as an added bonus, it was such a beautiful morning, with such a peaceful walk, that I really started to feel like I could get to like this joint.

Here's a couple of more pics from our outing taken on my crappy Blackberry... (WHY can't I remember to tote along my camera??? That's why I miss all of the great picture moments!)

Prissy like Minnie

Wise ass

Ok, so today after searching for something to feed the kids for breakfast, I decided I HAD to go to the grocery store... Which I totally hate - by the way. Usually my lovely husband does the deed, but we had no milk, bread, eggs, or ANYTHING. Armed with my "healthy" list and determined to "shop the perimeter" I headed off to Kroger... After an hour and a half of serious focus, I felt pretty good about all I found... Of course, until I had to PAY for what all I found. Organic isn't cheap people. I am going to have to local a farmers market soon.

Anyway, one of my purchases was a strawberry flavored pro biotic soy drink called Kefir. Yeah. I don't know what the hell any of that means either. But it's supposed to be terrific for you, so what the heck. Cut to dinner... when I'm trying to convince my kids that brown bread tastes just as good as Bunny bread... (I made grilled cheese sandwiches for them to ease them into it... they looked burned to the kids, so it worked.) I poured them a bit of the Kefir into their cups and added milk to cut the taste of it... flavored or not, this stuff is weird... When they were nearly finished, I told them they had to either eat all of their carrots or drink all of their milk. They took the carrots.

After I try an explanation of how it's a healthy drink that has lots of vitamins in it, Abby informs me in her most innocent lovely voice, "Oh, well, it's OK if we don't drink it, because we get all of our vitamins from the wonderful meals you cook." Batting eyes... smiling with head tipped to the side... Smart ass. I still had to kiss her for it though. There's no fooling that kid.

And as for shopping the perimeter of the grocery store... It actually worked out pretty well. I was probably 70% perimeter... then I had to get oatmeal, bread, spices, and nuts... but I was close!

Spring Cleaning and "Tha Sistas"

We're barely into "Winter" and I've already started my Spring cleaning... and no, that's not me... my hair isn't highlighted, and my "sistas" (a.k.a. boobs) aren't that small. But I've been cleaning none-the-less. I hope it makes my blog load a bit faster (I promise to keep the music on my ipod and off the blog).

Speaking of "Tha Sistas"...

Convo with Jillian (age 4 and 3/4) from last night after I was out of the shower, but not quite dressed.

knock knock knock... Mommy, Can I use your potty?

Why are you knocking, you've never bothered before?

I really need to go to the baffroom and Daddy wont get out.

Why don't you go to the two other "baffrooms"

Because I just want to be around you.

Oh, well, alright. Hurry and go before you pee on yourself. Jillian... young ladies don't need to actually hold themselves when they are trying to not pee pee.

Silence while focusing on the potty... Then...

Mommy, how do you get those?

Those what?

Those things... she says while lifting her shirt and trying to look at her own chest

Well, first, those things are called breasts and they grow when you get older.

Oh, like when your 7?

No baby, hopefully not until your like 40.

Are you 40.

Do you think I look 40?

No... Maybe your like sixteen hundred!

I am NOT 1600.

How old are you?

I'm 25. (yes, I lied to my child)

So they get bigger when you get older? (jeesh! there's no distracting this one...)

Yes. (Keep it simple Mommy and maybe she'll drop it...)

Wow.... then you must be really old.

Thanks Dot. Out while I get dressed.

Abby!!!! (she yells while stomping down the stairs) Mommy's REEAALL Old!

Bridget the Original Blogger

Bridget: It is a truth universally acknowledged that when one part of your life starts going okay, another falls spectacularly to pieces.

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Cue the Holidays... We've been feeling out of sorts lately... it's been like that particularly annoying song...

4 strep throats; 3 stomach problems; two heads of lice; and a freakin partridge in a pear tree!

I KNEW things were going a bit too smoothly lately. And the lice... well, let's just say that NOW I believe in Murphy's Law. Makes my head itch just thinking about it. Oh, well, sorry about that. Now I've just made YOUR head itch as well.

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Which brings all of the random thoughts in my head around full circle. I love Bridget Jones's Diary... It's pretty funny to say the least. And I believe I just challenged Lara Gallagher via Eatopia to a posting dual of sorts... So at random parts of the day, I'll be posting bits of verbal diarrhea to make myself hop my "arse you could park a bike in and balance a pint of beer on" (Mark Darcy said it, not me...) onto the elliptical. In addition to all of the other random bits of unnecessary information that I post. Cheers! And Happy New Year!