Raiders of the Magic Ivory (1988)

Original title: I Predatori della Pietra Magica

Action/Indiana Jones-rippoff. Italy. Starring Christopher Ahrens, James Mitchum & Clarissa Mendez. Directed by Tonino Ricci.

HMV Movies (Japan). English dubbed. Letterboxed.

Curious mixture of Rambo-style shoot 'em up action and Indiana Jones shenanegans with a little bit of sci-fi/fantasy thrown in for good measure. Cheap but not badely made... quite entertaining actually! 3/5

Thor the Conqueror (1983)

Original title: Thor il Conquistatore

Fantasy. Italy. Starring Conrad Nichols, Malisa Longo, Maria Romano, Raf Baldassarre & Christopher Holm. Directed by Tonino Ricci.

VTC (Sweden). English dubbed. Fullscreen.

The dumbest, cheapest, crappiest, most moronic sword and sorcery flick imaginable. It's not without a certain Grade Z appeal though. Who could resist lines like "the woman is weak, Thor - take her!" (it's one of the most unashamedly sexist - even pro-rape- films in history and all the funnier for it) or "centuries from now this will be called a Horse". This swedish video release states that "Leading man Conrad Nichols has a disarming charm behind his muscles" on the cover, possibly the biggest lie in video cover history. While one of the worst films on this blog, Thor is not without its entertainment value and should be watched at least once. 2/5

Robin Hood, Arrows, Beans and Karate (1976)

Original title: Storia di Arcieri, Pugni e Occhi Neri

Robin Hood/Comedy. Italy/Spain. Starring Alan Steel, Cris Huerta, Victoria Abril & Charly Bravo. Directed by Tonino Ricci.

VTC (Sweden). English dubbed. Widescreen.

Alan Steel is the overaged Robin Hood in this incredibly daft slapstick adventure, yet another opportunistic cheapie by hack director Ricci. I was expecting the worst but ended up liking this film quite a bit, albeit purely as entertaining trash: just turn off your brain and enjoy the zany humour, kung fu (!) and Steel's wretched performance! Just call me an idiot. 3/5