Introducing...

As Benson mentioned, God has been doing an amazing work in our lives - in more ways than one! The past month or so, the Lord really convicted me to be still and listen. So, instead of blogging I have been spending time reading and teaching God's word. It has been an amazing, life-changing month for me.

On October 21st, God fulfilled a promise to Benson and I when we found out that we were pregnant for a second time...something that we had been praying for but didn't expect to be answered this soon. So, it is with a joyful heart that I proudly introduce to you.... 

...the Sexton 4!!



Today, I am 8 weeks pregnant with our sweet rainbow baby. It has been an emotional but blessed experience to be pregnant with Luke's little brother or sister. Luke has definately had a hand in this new special blessing - as our new baby's due date is... June 29th, his birthday! You cannot tell me that we do not serve an AWESOME God!

Please continue to pray for us and for our sweet miracle. Even with our joyful news there is not a day that goes by that we don't miss Luke. We know that the next few months will be filled with many anxious doctors appointments and a wide range of emotions but we are standing steadfast on the promises of God - praying and believing that this baby is healthy and whole.

We look forward to sharing this new journey with all of you!

Kristin

We are ready for you Luke!!!

Our bags are packed and in the car.
The nursery is ALMOST finished.
The trash has been taken out and the house is clean.
The car seat is installed.

So, we sit...and wait...until I go into labor or until Tuesday morning - whichever comes first.

We still cannot believe that we are almost there. This is officially our last Saturday as a family of two! Luke will be here, ready or not in three days.

Here are a few pictures of Luke's nursery.

After many months of waiting, I finally have the bedding I wanted! Now if Target would just hurry up and ship the crib skirt and curtains - Luke's room would be completely finished!

Countdown to baby!

We had our last appointment in Louisville yesterday! We will go in for induction next Tuesday morning unless he decides to make an early appearance before then. I am 1cm dilated and 25% effaced and Luke's head is fully engaged, so Dr. Tabb thought there was a possibility I may not make it till Tuesday...but I guess we will just wait and see! Either way, we are less than five days away from Luke's arrival!

Doctors are still feeling really good about Luke's heart. They were able to get a good view of it again yesterday and things still looked the same as last week. Dr. Tabb felt confident that the pulmonary artery and aorta are normal size - which indicates that there is blood flow in the left side. Now, we just have to wait and see what tests show after Luke is born to find out exactly what that means in terms of surgery and how things will proceed. Dr. Tabb told us again before we left that in his 30 years of doing high-risk fetal medicine that Luke has the best hypoplastic left heart that he has ever seen. We are definitely praising the Lord for such positive words from a doctor that we have full confidence in and continuing to pray for tests to show a fully functional left ventricle once he is born.

Everyone keeps asking me if I'm ready, and yes, part of me is so ready to see his little face and hold him for the first time. The other part is really sad that my pregnancy is coming to an end. When I first found out I was pregnant everyone talked about how miserable I would be, but honestly, I have loved even the most painful moments of it. I have been blessed with very little sickness and fatigue and have really felt better then when not pregnant. It has been the most amazing experience - one that completely changes your life and how you look at the world. It's crazy to think that this day is finally almost here!

I will admit, I am a bunch of nerves thinking about Luke's birth. It is enough to be nervous about the birth of your first baby - much less adding on all of the other unknowns that we are facing. We know that there are so many people out there who love and are praying for us and we could never tell you just how much it means to us. However, we are asking that instead of coming to visit us in the hospital that you would just lift us up in prayer from home instead. Luke's birth will not be a "normal" situation and no one except immediate family will be able to see him right after he is born - possibly not even for several days after depending on what happens in terms of surgery. After his birth, he will be immediately taken over to Kosair's NICU where tests will be run to determine his final diagnosis. I will be recovering and will obviously have a lot on my mind. Benson and I will have doctors coming in to discuss test results and go over decisions regarding Luke's condition. Needless to say, it will be a very chaotic and emotional time for us all. The most love and support you can offer us is through prayer. We will let you know later, once Luke is stable and we know more about what our future holds, when we are ready for visitors outside of our immediate families.

I am so excited to see how the next week will change our lives. I am even more excited to be part of something incredible the Lord is doing through my little boy's heart. I am scared, anxious, nervous and overwhelmed but I know that the victory over our situation has already been won. The Lord fought my son's battle and paid the ultimate price on the cross. When I am reminded of that remarkable, earthshaking power - I have peace. No matter how scared or nervous I may feel - I know in my hearth that the Lord is still on His throne and is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He will still be the same God next Tuesday when I am in labor and when Luke is born. In the moment of my greatest fears, He will be there and He will hold my son's heart in His hands. Right now, I have no idea what will happen but the Lord has promised me His presence and that alone is enough to get me through anything.

-- Kristin

A new day.

For the past seven weeks....

...my medical chart has had "Fetal HLHS" written in bold black ink across it.

...I have typed in "hypoplastic left heart syndrome" into the Google search bar.

...I have cried in the shower when no one is around because I am scared.

...I have went to the doctor once, even twice a week to watch a little heart flicker on a large screen and have doctors stand over me and explain, in detail, my son's condition to sonographers who have never seen a HLHS baby before.

...Benson and I have prayed every night and almost every moment of the day that God would be glorified in our son's heart...and that the Lord would give us a miracle.

However, today is a new day...Praise the Lord!

Yesterday was our weekly appointment in Louisville. We walked in expecting the same routine. Just like every other week, we greeted Dr. Tabb when he came into the room. He shook our hands, poured gel on my belly and placed the probe on top of me. Our little boy's chest popped up on the screen. We expected the same response we had heard every week since we had been seeing Dr. Tabb..."the blood flow looked good, baby was moving good, no change, see you back next week." However, the first three words that came out of the doctor's mouth caused both of our hearts to stop momentarily...

"Well, that's interesting."

The next few seconds seemed to last forever.

"These are the best images I have ever gotten of your child......"

A few more seconds pass.

"....and his left ventricle is much larger than I thought was."

Turns out, Luke has decided that he wants to shake everyone up a little bit. What was once a typical HLHS diagnosis is now an issue of "well, we really don't know what it is." Dr. Tabb is "cautiously hopeful" that Luke's heart is beginning to improve. What was once a "sliver" of a left ventricle has doubled if not tripled in size. Babies with HLHS typically have an aorta that is the size of a string due to the lack of blood flow going through the left ventricle. Luke's aorta, however, appears to be normal size. Before leaving his office, Dr. Tabb told us..."in all the years I have been doing this...I have never seen a hypoplastic baby like this."

Fast forward two hours later to our appointment with Luke's cardiologist.

I am laying on another ultrasound table while Dr. Arensmann performs an echocardiogram on Luke. We tell him about the images Dr. Tabb saw earlier that day and while he cannot get the same clear images - he begins to laugh and tells us, "consider it a GOOD thing that you have us all confused."

Basically, we are back at the beginning. No one can tell us WHAT is going on with Luke's heart. They can't tell us what will happen once he is born and how many surgeries he will have to have. They can't tell us how long we will be in the hospital or what life will look like for us in a few weeks. They honestly cannot tell us what to expect or even what scenario it could possibly be. We all, including the doctors and surgeons, will simply have to wait and see what Luke's heart looks like once he is born.

God reminded me this morning in my devotion of the blessing that comes when you WAIT upon the Lord.  There are amazing promises that He makes to those who simply choose to be patient for the Lord's will to be done.

"For since the world began,
no ear has heard,
and no eye has seen a God like you,
who works for those who wait for him!" - Isaiah 64:4 (NLT)
 
"I waited patiently for the LORD;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear
and put their trust in the LORD.
Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods." - Psalm 40:1-4 (NIV)

"Because of the Lords great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him."
The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;
it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD."  - Lamentations 3:22-26 (NIV)

"Yet those who wait for the LORD
Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary." - Isaiah 40:31 (NASB)
 
In today's society - uncertainty means fear. To not know our future terrifies us. We feel that we must always know what is going on and that we should always have answers. However, God doesn't always choose to show us answers right away. There is a blessing that comes in having patience partnered with perseverance...in giving God our uncertainty and letting Him take control in the unknown of our relationships, our health and our plans for our lives.

Most people think that the unknown is a scary place to be - however, for a family who has went through the past seven weeks thinking of all that our baby will have to go through - we praise the Lord to "not know!"  Yes, they cannot tell us that our baby DOES NOT have Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome - but praise the Lord - they can no longer look us in the eyes and tell us with certainty that he DOES.

Please continue to pray! As much as the doctor's like to "have all the answers" and give us an expected prognosis for our son's future, only the Lord knows Luke's heart. He is at work and most importantly, He is being glorified through it all. Yesterday was proof that the Lord is good and hears our prayers.

They told us that you cannot "fix" a Hypoplastic Left Heart - that only surgeries would save his life. However, our son is showing the world before he is even born that "nothing is impossible with God". - Luke 1:37

PS: Not only did we get good news at the doctor - we also got to see our little boy's squished face! :) Of course I think he's the most beautiful little guy ever and just had to share! (sorry, its a little blurry from being taken from my Blackberry!)

Who holds tomorrow.

We had a great doctor's appointment Friday despite the fact that Benson needed to be at work and I was stubborn and refused to let anyone else drive but me. Lately, I'm figuring out that my poor body isn't able function like normal and long trips make for an extremely uncomfortable experience - a lesson that I unfortunately had to learn about the hard way! Luke weighed in at approximately 6 pounds (praise the Lord!) and Dr. Tabb couldn't find any fluid on his lungs (PRAISE THE LORD!). Thank you all so much for your prayers! Before we left, Dr. Tabb told us that we will induce labor at 39 weeks if he hasn't already decided to make an appearance before then. Most likely, they will start the induction on a Sunday night and deliver on Monday. So, unless Luke has other plans, we will be looking at a birthday on June 28th!

My bags are finally packed and my body is definately ready for Luke to get here - but emotionally, I wish he could just stay put inside me forever. As long as I can feel him kick and roll around in my belly, I know that he is okay. His heart is functioning fine and he doesn't have to endure surgeries, tubes and IVs. I wish that I could just stop time and protect him forever. I would gladly endure all this pain and misery for the rest of my life if it meant he would be okay...but the beauty of it all is that "everything rides on hope now." There is something so terrifying yet so glorious about giving EVERYTHING - your whole life - over to the Lord. To release the idea that you are in control, to accept your situation and cling onto the faith that God will work things out for your good. As his mom, I am terrified as to what we will have to go through in the next month but as a Christian, I am excited to be part of what God is doing through Luke. I cannot wait to hold a miracle in my arms and to witness the glory of the Lord through his healing.

Someone told me today that they were inspired by the way I am handling everything and I replied, "really, its no different than it was before." Of course I know the reality of our situation, I know what could happen, I know that there are few things that are more serious in "medical" terms. However, I look at our struggle the same way I look at life. Our life is just as uncertain as it was before we knew about Luke's heart - the only difference is that we are more aware of the uncertainty. Today, I realized that facing HLHS is so much like accepting Christ for the first time. There is an undescribable fear that comes with giving your life to someone you can't physically touch or see. In fact, being a true follower of Christ is one of the most difficult life paths imaginable - it will take you places you don't want to go and cause you to face battles you don't think you can overcome. The Lord never promises us that life will be easy but He does promise that through every situation, He will never leave us. I know that It will be hard and our hearts will surely break a thousand times but when it is all said and done - it will all be worth it. I don't know what tomorrow holds, but I do know who holds tomorrow and that makes all the difference.

Update on Luke: 36 weeks!

I think it really hit us this week that Luke is almost here. It's crazy to think that we have less than 3 weeks of life just being "the two of us." The biggest part of me wishes that we could just skip over the next few months of hospitals and surgeons and just be at home with our perfect little baby boy. However, I know that the Lord has a lot of showing off to do in the next few weeks and I know that every hard day will be more than worth it in the end.

Last Wednesday at our appointment with Dr. Tabb, he found a small spot of fluid on one of Luke's lungs. He explained to us that pleural effusions can occur in babies that are completely healthy and most likely was not associated with his heart defect. Many times these pockets of fluid go away on their own and are nothing to worry about, however if it continued to increase in size that it could be a sign that something else is going on and Luke would need to be delivered in order to find out what was causing the problem. He had us come back on Monday so he could keep an eye on our little guy. We went back on Monday and the fluid was still there but had not increased in size. Dr. Tabb said that everything looked fine and that we would just continue to monitor it.

We go back again on Friday and then next week will start checking for dilation. The current plan is just to wait and see how things progress. They don't really want to "set a date" because they want Luke to develop as much as possible on his own. When we get close to 39 weeks we will probably discuss induction, but until then I'm supposed to take it easy, rest and eat...all of which I am doing plenty of!

Please continue to pray for us. It always helps me when praying for others to know specifically WHAT to be praying for, so here are ways you can lift us up:

1. Pray for God's healing in Luke's life. Obviously, we all want to see Luke's heart be completely whole. We know and trust that God is in the process of healing our little baby and we choose to accept that healing in whatever form the Lord chooses to provide it to us.
2. Pray that Luke continues to grow and develop and that the fluid in his lungs will disappear completely.
2. Pray for Benson and I. The closer we get to Luke's arrival, the more Satan tries to attack our spirits and emotions. Recently, we both have had a lot of difficult days but have overcome them thanks to your prayers. We truly can feel the peace of the Lord!
3. Continue to pray for our friends Stephen & Sarah Gardner. Many of you know them, but they are a special couple and their family has meant so much to both Benson and I. God is working a miracle in Sarah's life and we would greatly appreciate you continuing to lift her and her baby up to the Lord. You can read about her story at: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/sarahgardner.

We love you all and thank you for all of your words of encouragement and support!

Kristin

Before the Morning

We had an amazing Memorial Day weekend and were able to spend time with a lot of our family and friends. We laid around, watched TV, sat outside, ate a lot of burgers and spent a lot of time laughing together. I am so blessed because I could think of no one I would rather spend every second of my life with than my husband.

I also started packing for the hospital this weekend which was an overwhelming task in itself. I have no idea what to pack for the hospital in the first place, much less what to pack if we should be there for several weeks. By the end of the weekend, I was emotionally exhausted.

As strong as I am, there are moments when the reality of what is going to happen really hits me. I think its the fear of not knowing what to expect that hurts me the most. I absolutely hate that we have to go through this. I hate that in just a few short weeks our lives will never be "normal" again. I hate everything about HLHS. However, in those moments...I stop and realize that God is still God. He is still in control and He has promised us that He will never leave us. As much as I hate how broken my heart feels sometimes, I know that God has a purpose for it all.

I found this video today and it brought me to tears. It is the story behind the song "Before The Morning" -- which I hear on KLove almost every day. I heard this song for the first time not long after we found out about Luke's heart and it really ministered to me. It wasn't until today that I found out it was actually written about a boy with Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. I hope you will watch it and most of all, that you will see how the Lord works through our pain and suffering to bring glory to the Father.

I choose to be victorious..

UPDATE: Doctor's appointment yesterday went well. Dr. Tabb was out of the office so we met with Dr. Fines instead. She was great but wasn't as familiar with our case as Dr. Tabb. She said the baby is doing great.. he scored an 8 out of 8 on his biophysical profile. However, he is a little on the smaller side on all of his growth percentiles. He weighs 4lbs and 15oz. She agreed after looking at his heart that it seemed to be a Hypoplastic Left Heart and once again, was immediately able to see that the left ventricle was present. Everything looked good and they will see me back next week.

This week marked a big change in the life of Benson and I as we resigned from our position as youth ministers at St. Andrew UMC. It was a really bittersweet night as we sat in the youth room for the last night with our "kids." The last four years I have spent with them have been the most rewarding of my life. I can remember the first time I brought Benson to youth after we had started dating...I remember calling and texting them telling them we were engaged. I remember all the nights where they were "convinced" that I was pregnant with a baby they lovingly named "Barry"...and I remember the day, not so long ago when I told them I was in fact pregnant. They have been one of the biggest parts of my life and always will be. However, as much as I love them I know it is time - time to end the chapter of my life as "youth minister" and become a "mother" to a precious baby boy. After loving those kids with my entire heart for so long, I can only imagine how much I will love him...I just hope he doesn't cause me as many sleepless nights, screaming fits and uncontrollable tears as they have - but for some reason, I feel that he will.

my life for the past four years...

My final lesson with them talked about something I have been dealing with lately --- how to deal with life when it doesn't give you what you want. We all have been there or will be there at some point. Something happens to us that is not fair - our parents divorce, our boyfriend cheats on us, we lose our job, we start to suffer from depression, a family member finds out they have cancer...our baby is diagnosed with a potentially fatal heart defect. Life just simply sucks sometimes and hands us a card that we wish we were never dealt. When faced with any hard situation, we all have a choice. A choice to either be a victim of our pain or to rise above it and be victorious.

We can choose to let our situation become an excuse for our negative behavior, to complain, to drink our problems away, to lay down and cry until we can't breathe, to dig ourselves a hole, crawl into it and never come out. We can allow bitterness to consume our hearts and curse God OR we can choose to let God use us in our pain, to rise above our circumstance, to cling onto hope and find joy in the midst of our anger.

The reality of our situation, no matter how bad it may seem, is this - Christ died on a cross so that we can have hope, so that we can have a life beyond this earth. He fought the battle against sin and death so that the VICTORY is already ours. In hard times, we can choose to be victorious...and by doing so, by giving our circumstances over to Christ --- we can be assured that no matter the outcome, the Lord will somehow be glorified through it all. We don't understand His Will, we were never meant to. There is nothing wrong with asking, "God, why me?" but we have to trust that God sees the bigger picture and though the sorrow may last through the night, JOY will come in the morning. In my life, no matter what happens to us or to Luke, I choose to let Christ be glorified, I choose to be victorious...and in that, I find peace.

I heard this song on the way home today and it spoke volumes to my heart...it is exactly where I am at this very moment.

MercyMe - Bring the Rain

I can count a million times

People asking me how I

Can praise You with all that I've gone through

The question just amazes me

Can circumstances possibly

Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed

Long before these rainy days

It's never really ever crossed my mind

To turn my back on you, oh Lord

My only shelter from the storm

But instead I draw closer through these times

So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace

Bring the chance to be free

Bring me anything that brings You glory

And I know there'll be days

When this life brings me pain

But if that's what it takes to praise You

Jesus, bring the rain

I am Yours regardless of

The dark clouds that may loom above

Because You are much greater than my pain

You who made a way for me

By suffering Your destiny

So tell me what's a little rain

So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace

Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory

And I know there'll be days

When this life brings me pain

But if that's what it takes to praise You

Jesus, bring the rain

Holy, holy, holy

Holy, holy, holy

Is the Lord God Almighty

Is the Lord God Almighty

-- Kristin

The day I became I mother...

April 27, 2010.

Benson and I wake up and head to Lexington to a new doctor we were being referred to for a high level ultrasound. The doctor had told us that we had nothing to worry about, that everything looked fine...they just wanted to double check since our little guy refused to let anyone in Campbellsville see all four chambers of his heart. Benson was worried (as usual) but I was confident that everything was fine; they were just milking my insurance...we would see our little boy, hear he was perfect and spend the rest of the day shopping. I had even planned a photography session that night, no big deal.

After getting to the doctor's office, we were surrounded by the most amazing medical staff. While waiting for the doctor to come in, we were put in a small, dimly lit room with one large painting on the far wall. It was a painting we had never seen before and as soon as we sat down, Benson stood up to take a closer look...It was of a doctor, sitting at his desk with a Bible laid over top of a medical record and Jesus standing behind him guiding him through an obviously difficult situation.

As we sat and talked about how awesome it was that our doctor had that picture in his office, I had little idea what that picture would mean to me by the end of the day. We were escorted back to an ultrasound room and were introduced to our doctor and the sweetest sonographer we had ever met. We laughed with them as our little boy bounced and turned on the screen. However, after several minutes...they began to get more serious, more focused on his little heart that beat right in front of us. I remember when the doctor said that something didn't look just right...I looked over at Benson as he covered his face with his hands. In that moment, I was scared.

Immediately, we were sent across the street to St. Joseph East to Claudine, a lady who specialized in echocardiograms on fetal hearts. Before walking over to the hospital, we went back and sat in the car and cried. At that point, we didn't know what to expect or what was going on. Would our baby live or die? Was this even fixable? We decided not to call our family until we knew more. Hand in hand, we walked to the hospital and filled out paperwork and sat for what seemed like days in a small waiting room. I remember begging, pleading with God in my mind...holding on to the hope that we would walk in and she would say that everything was fine, that she could see all four chambers and we could go home and go on with our lives.

Once we were back into the room, I laid down as Claudine gelled up my belly. I looked at the screen and saw this perfect little boy with two little feet and two little hands. As she took almost 100 pictures of his heart, I remember staring at the walls...I remember thinking about how just a few hours ago, the most important thing in my mind was how the colors in the nursery just HAD to coordinate perfectly with everything. How I spent hours in my mind envisioning what we would put on the shelves in his room, and how it was so important that I got a certain car seat and stroller. I remember obsessing over baby clothes and what he would and would not wear and spent hours researching what brand of diaper to buy. However, in that moment...laying on that table, holding my husband's hand...staring at a blank wall...I became a mother.

I realized that it didn't matter how many outfits my baby had in his closet, or if his bedding was the same shade of green as the walls. It didn't matter if my diaper bag had his name on it or if I got the right kind of bathtub...all that mattered was that little heart that flickered on that screen. The only thing that was important to me was that he was going to be okay. That day, my life stopped being about me and started being about my little baby boy. I knew that no matter what it took that Benson and I would do everything we could to make sure he was healthy and happy...even if that meant giving up our own lives to save his.

After the echocardiogram, we went back to the doctor's office and back into the room with the painting. Our doctor came in immediately and sat down with us and for the first time we heard the words "Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome." He explained that our son's heart didn't fully develop and that he wasn't sure he could see a left ventricle. We would need more ultrasounds, more tests, cardiologist appointments and possibly open heart surgeries after he was born. He told us not to get on the internet and to wait until we met with a pediatric cardiologist in Louisville the next day to ask questions. I remember the sonographer hugging me and telling me to have faith and the doctor holding my hand and telling me that everything would be okay. They performed an amniocentesis on me before we left...something that I never imagined I would have to do...that made me start having false contractions and cramping. We got into the car and cried together...it was a long, painful drive home but we never let go of each other hands. That day, we became more than partners, friends or lovers...we became parents...and despite the pain and overwhelming uncertainty that we had to face, we fell more in love with each other and more in love with the Lord.

That day, our son...our lives became that "difficult case" we saw in the painting. More than ever, we found ourselves in need of the guidance and direction of God for our baby's healing. We began to rely solely upon the grace and peace of God for our every breath, casting every care, every worry upon Him. We began to pray that Christ would be glorified through our son and through our testimony...that in every situation, no matter how bad, we would choose to praise His holy name. We began to claim that no matter what diagnosis we received that our trust would remain only in the Lord and that He alone knew our son and his heart. Instead of labeling our baby with a "syndrome," we chose to believe that the Lord was not making a mistake with his heart, but rather making a miracle. Today, we still believe that He is making that miracle....and today, we are stronger in our faith because of the life our son has already begun to live before he is even born.

-- Kristin

He Has a Name!

Yesterday was a HUGE day in the Sexton house. We finally arrived at a name for our son. Honestly, I thought he would not have a name until he was born. It wasn’t that we couldn’t find a name we liked, but that we had several that we really liked! However, atop all lists from day one was one name, Luke Aaron Sexton.

God gave me a verse last week and when I read it I was amazed. Luke 1:37 says, “For nothing is impossible with God.” I shared the verse with Kristin and we left it at that. Yesterday Kristin called me and said that she had prayed over the verse all morning and she knew 110% that our baby should be named Luke.

Let me break it down for you: God chose a man named Luke to spread His message and the life of Christ. Luke will be our 1st son. The pediatric cardiologist informed us that they will induce Kristin at 37 weeks. Is this cool or what???? However, it gets better! Luke 1:37 is referring to where the Angel of the Most High God is speaking with Mary about the conception of Jesus Christ. What a miracle!

Now, we are definitely not saying that our son is Jesus but we are saying that God still works miracles just the same. He gave me that verse and everything about it lines up with our situation. So, since Luke has been on top of our list from day one, and God has chosen to use that verse to comfort us in time of fear and anxiety, our son’s name will be Luke Aaron.

Also, you can’t spell Luke without UK!

Give God praise for the miracles in your life! They are all around you; all you have to do is take the time to see them!

-- Benson

Peace Be Still

After talking to my sister on my way home from work today I started to turn on my radio. I pushed the button but quickly decided to ride the rest of the way in silence. However, I heard a voice say turn it back on. The station was set to 91.7 and the first note of the following Rush of Fools song hit as soon as I turned up the volume. These are the words God had for me at that moment:

Peace Be Still

Verse 1
Come to Me, you who are weak
Let My strength be yours tonight
Come and rest, let My love be your bed
Let My heart be yours tonight

Chorus
Peace be still, Peace be still
Please be still and know that I am God
and know that I am God

Verse 2
Come empty cup, let Me fill you up
I'll descend on you like a dove tonight
Lift your head, let your eyes fall into Mine
Let your fear subside tonight

Bridge
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

My God is in complete control and He is molding my baby boy in His perfect image.

-- Benson

Praise Him in the Storm

Hey everyone, Benson here. I am going to update the blog with a few journal notes I posted on Facebook once we found out about our son's condition so that we can keep all our story on one site. We pray that God blesses you as your read our story.

April 28th, 2010

Some of you know, most of you don't, that Kristin and I have had an extremely tough two days. There are, and will be, a lot of questions so I decided to journal for all to see. Let's get started...

Several weeks ago Kristin had her first ultrasound at Taylor Regional Hospital. Our baby boy was lively, and perfect. The only question was the radiologist could not clearly see all four chambers of his heart because the baby was too active.

Fast forward to last week...We returned for an ultrasound at Taylor Regional Hospital to examine the chambers of the heart. However, the radiologist determined the baby was in a bad position to clearly see the heart. So, our doctor sent us to Lexington for a fetal echocardiogram.

Yesterday, Tuesday, we visited Dr. Berry Campbell in Lexington. Upon arrival they told us they were to look at the heart and from all indication there were no abnormalities. However, once the sonographer examined the baby they still could not see all four chambers of the heart. They sent us to another sonographer that specializes in hearts. She found the four chambers but determined the left ventrical and atrium were underdeveloped. We then returned to Dr. Campbell's office and were met with a fantastic medical staff that treated us like their own children. We found that our son has Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, meaning that once born his heart will not function to keep his body alive. This completely blew our minds.

Today, Wednesday, we met Dr. Arensman in Louisville, a pediatric cardiologist. According to his dictation he saw more than the doctor's yesterday but determined that our son does have Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. He was very encouraging saying that several years ago there were no medical procedures to correct the defect, but today there is a series of three surgeries. The first is called the Norwood procedure that happens two-three days after birth, the second is called the Glenn procedure that will take place around 8 months, and the third is the Fontain procedure that will occur around 18 months. Our son is in line for a lot of medical treatment early in his life with these open heart surgeries, but we are confident that he is in very good hands. We will meet with the pediatric cardiologist and surgeons in the coming weeks to complete our intended plan of action. However, the official diagnosis will not take place until the baby is born and a full analysis of the heart is completed.

Here is the good news. Kristin will have a normal childbirth with no risks for our son. He will be normal size and no one will be able to tell that anything is wrong with his heart. All his other organs are fully developed and/or developing and he is perfectly healthy inside the womb. He will be hooked to an IV that will help the blood flow until the first surgery is complete. He will be in the hospital for approximately three weeks. He will be in the hospital around 5 days for the second and third surgeries.

Here is the GREAT news. Kristin and I serve a great God! He has comforted us and given us a peace that is undescribable. He has taken away our fears and given us vision. We are not looking left or right, but straight ahead with our eyes on the Cross. Satan will not still our joy and he has been defeated. Better yet, our sons heart disease has been defeated. When Christ died, He died for sins but he also conquered the grave, sickness, sorrow, and all things that are not of God's nature! Healing is there for all to receive, and we claim our sons healing in the name of Jesus Christ! Through our son's medical situation something great will happen that will bring ALL glory to God. We will not stop praising Him for even a second! He created our son in His image and will continue to bless him throughout his entire life. Our sons heart does not have the word syndrome attached to it, instead it has Jesus written across it!

Please join us in giving all praise to God, and continue to keep our family in your prayers. I will update as we know more.

-- Benson