Endings

 

This morning as I sat drinking my coffee and reading through social media, I was served up a meme with a quote by Brian Cox, the scientist (not the actor). 

Over the years I've enjoyed his programs on science, so I was interested in this quote:

"The ultimate paradox, of course, is that even though we're all going to die, we've all got to live in the meantime."

Given I am in the 'twilight' of my years (and privileged to be so) I have spent a fairly long time working out how I am going to live before it is time to die.

I've made mistakes.  I've done stupid things.  I've said hurtful things, and had some hurled at me.

I hope I have learned from those.  I have tried to be a better human as a consequence of messing things up.  To fix what I can.  To walk away when things have not worked out, and done that without flouncing.  Just...go my way and try to do better next time I mess up.

Which is a whole lot like weaving, too.  So many ways that weaving and learning feed my life.  

But I'm still here - long beyond when I thought I would be.  Frankly, given my family history, I wasn't sure I would make it to 75.  My father and brother both gone in their 50s.  Many others gone long before I hit my 70s.  Mom was an outlier in her family, living to 90.  

I could have died last year.  But I didn't.  But the past few years have not been, well, kind to me.

And so I am left with that one crucial task to tend to:  figure out how I will live the rest of my life.

Expectations have fallen by the wayside.  Energy is practically non-existent.  But I keep working to try and make things 'better'.

And while we rarely know the day of our death, it is a good idea to keep in mind - no one gets out of 'here' alive.

I talk to the pain doc next week.  I have no idea what - if anything - more he can do for me.  But I've got a warp on the loom.  I still (oh my gawd, yes *still*) have yarn that wants weaving.  I have an article I've tentatively begun for WEFT, and possibly another in the wings.

These things are carrots I hold before my nose, like you'd do to a horse, to keep them coming along.

As I go through my days, I try to help others, as best I can.  I try to encourage others.  

And if that is all I can manage in a day, well, it's better than sitting around feeling sorry for myself and *not* doing anything.  Because one thing I've come to realize, the pain is here and it's not going to go away - probably.  I cannot wallow in the mire of the fields of pain.

Today one of Santa's helpers delivered a gift, which means I have some new puzzles to build, too (two arrived a few days ago, personally delivered.)  

As for my house?  Yes, it's a mess.  But even in that we have managed to tame a few piles of clutter.  It's too little to make a dent, but *I* know that we've tried.  And if my energy 'holds', if my desire to leave less clutter and mess behind continues, there will be less of my mess to toss when I shuffle off this mortal coil.

And if this post is too morbid, I'm sorry.  But just like oil and gas will run out, my life force will, at some point in time.  If we don't deal with oil and gas and get alternatives, humanity is going to have to do some fast turn arounds.  As for me?  Well, again, no one gets out of here alive.  And I'm embarrassed at the stuff I've accumulated over the years.  It's hard to let some of it go.  But I will have to when the time comes.  Might as well take the burden of my spouse and friends and deal with it myself.

And who knows?  Maybe the pain doctor will have another strategy up his sleeve.  It's harder to remain hopeful and optimistic, but I'm trying.  And I will know more next week?  One way or another...

Quiet Milestone

 

Probably the first 'meme' I ever made...

The other day this blog had a quiet Milestone - viewership is now over 4 million page views.

I kind of stopped counting when I realized that bots were 'raiding' sites like mine, selling the active URL addresses so they could start making comments on posts and advertise their own product.  Some of them, at least, made a comment that was 'appropriate' (sort of) to my content, but most didn't bother, just added their name and a link to their website to 'advertise' to my readers.

And then I had the harasser, and started moderating comments.  It meant a little more work on my part, but it was worth it, I felt.

Now we are dealing with AI scraping content.  I suppose some bright spark will eventually figure out how to scrape blogs for their content too.  I'm hoping the whole house of cards collapses before they get to that point.

As usual humans have taken what was once a good idea and fouled the waters so much it's getting aggravating to even participate.

Someone asked me when I would get back to playing Scrabble - something that filled many hours while I was recovering from the brain bleed.  But the ads were irritating so much I couldn't enjoy playing the game anymore.

I still have a couple of games I'm playing, but they keep changing the rules and I'm wondering when they start increasing their ads.  

As we enter the holiday season, I'm seeing lots of independent creative folk (like myself) trying to get the word out about the things we sell.  And I find myself adding to the noise, because I do still have books that people be interested in, classes they might find helpful.

And I am torn.  I know so many people are hurting in so many ways right now, do I want to add to the noise?  

Current events continue to run like a flooding river and the uncertainty is...overwhelming...at times.  But I'm pretty sure that the world will not end with a bang, but a whimper.  And it won't be everywhere, all at once.  And so, for some of us, life will go on, one way or another.  Plus weaving may very well become a survival skill once again, not a hobby.

I see new weavers popping in on groups, quite sincerely wanting to know more, learn how.  And so I keep trying.  To reach out.  To make new weavers aware.  To remove the stigma of perfection that kills good.  To pause and reflect on what they are actually doing.  And that to be good is, quite frequently, good enough.

Yes, yes, we all strive for 'perfection', but weaving is complex and takes years of learning to get even close to good *in every circumstance* - because change one thing, and everything can change.

Not to mention our bodies age, wear out, get injured.  Sometimes, one needs to face the facts and adjust what and how we are doing something.  And go back to 'beginner' mind and feel frustrated.  Just like I felt when I dressed the small loom and had road blocks and things go wrong the whole time.

But!  It's ready now.  I've just run out of spoons to try and weave on that loom today.  So I'm going to stop for the day and try to relax and not worry too much about what comes tomorrow.  And the day after that.  And the day after that.  Trying to stay in the moment.  For someone who used to use planning calendars because I needed to plan things 6 and farther out from 'now', it's a bit of a challenge.  The most important thing is to remember that things *have* changed and I need to change in response *to* those changes.  

But I can still weave.  Hopefully I can keep writing.  And most of all, I can keep lighting candles.

And that's not a bad thing.  Not at all.

I think I posted all the links for my stuff yesterday.  Scroll down if you want to use them.

No Mistakes!

 

Borrowed table top loom

From time to time I hear/see newer weavers exclaim that they can't wait until they don't make mistakes anymore.

Yeah, about that...

Well, not all of the challenges I had to deal with for this warp (and I'm not even finished dressing the loom - yet) were of my making.

I'm doing a 'thing' and the best way forward to get the 'thing' done was to borrow a small table top loom.  I planned a warp (I'm weaving 'samples') and based on the yarn and weave structure (2/8 cotton; Bronson Lace) decided a reasonable density was 20 epi.  Although 24 might be better.  I didn't know, but figured 20 was a good place to start.

Crunched the numbers.  Decided I wanted an uneven number of units so that any motif I wove could be centered, recalculated to make sure I had the correct thread count, then set about winding my warp.  All went well and the warp was waiting for me.

Then when I went to rough sley the warp (as I do), the *only* reed that would fit into the loom was the reed that came with it.  Which was 12 not 10.  Sigh.  Oh well.  

Re-calculated for the narrow sample I was making, the % of lace in the cloth (on average), how difficult lace can be to beat in (consistently) on a looser warp, decided that probably 24 was better than 20 anyway, and recalculated to make sure that by tightening the density I would still wind up with a decent (very narrow) warp.  Yes.  Just barely.

Today I thought I'd quickly beam the warp, but it's been a while since I worked on such a small loom and I was out of practice pulling on a warp.  Frankly, I'd have rather used my 4 shaft floor loom, but am not feeling up to weaving on that loom right now and was the reason I had borrowed the table top loom in the first place.

I had to figure out warp packing.  Such a small loom won't take much length and my warp packing of preference (which I couldn't find anyway - think I donated the bamboo mats to the guild) so I had to switch to brown paper.  Not my first preference but since I would likely be cutting off and retying a few times, probably would be ok.

The beaming on went ok, but then I had to transfer the lease sticks to the back of the loom (because rough sleyed reed) and then things fairly quickly fell apart.  The lease sticks came out entirely, but ta-da!  With the warp rough sleyed in the reed it was a quick matter of picking up the cross again.

I knew that the loom didn't have all that many heddles and Bronson Lace requires 50% of the heddles on one shaft.  Oops.  There were not enough heddles on any one shaft.  

But!  The loom has 8 shafts, so shafts 1 AND 2 were designated to work together as one, and then the draft was threaded as 'usual' on shafts 3, 4, and 5.  It meant I had to pay close attention as I manipulated the threads onto the appropriate shaft and remember to thread the weave structure correctly based on the conjoining of shaft 1 and 2 for the tabby a.

Doug agreed to drive me up to the guild room so I could look for a reed before I sleyed the warp, but the guild doesn't have one the right length, so hopefully tomorrow I can finish the last few units and then sley the reed and tie on.  And then wind some bobbins.  I need to decide on what I will weave for the samples, but that can happen in the next day or two.

So, not really any terminal 'mistakes' on my part, just a project that is proving to be more challenging than I'd hoped.  Kinda like life, really...

Unseen Forces

 

Thinking about 'unseen forces' in weaving, it's time to remind people that if you live in an arid climate, or more especially, one where the relative humidity swings seasonally, you may run afoul of the issue of low humidity in the air.

When that happens, things go 'wrong' and it may be difficult to tell why that is so.

When the relative humidity in the environment drops, weaving can become a challenge.

If you have an electric bobbin winder, you might start getting static discharge shocks while winding bobbins.  For some yarns, just winding a warp on a warping board or mill can see the generation of static discharges.

When the relative humidity drops, wooden equipment can develop issues as the wood shrinks.  The loom or whatever might develop squeaks, and screws become loose so the loom can go out of alignment or wobble.

Some yarns will behave poorly.  Linen and other cellulose yarns can suddenly stop co-operating.  Linen in particular will become stiff and unruly, and not want to feed off a rotating bobbin nicely.  

In the case of linen as weft, I wind bobbins ahead of time and store them in a 'humidor'.  And I don't fill the bobbins higher than the flanges on the bobbin because linen is dense and a very full bobbin can create excess drag that might be too much stress for selvedges.

If it gets very dry, other yarns will become less co-operative as well.  

If the relative humidity drops below 40% in the house I run a humidifier.  Everything just behaves 'better' and I have fewer issues with dry rough hands.

I still have a little linen yarn left that I need to use up, but I'm trying to work on a few other things right now.  Even though I'm not weaving with linen at the minute, the humidifier has been running for over a month, and will continue to run until spring when the relative humidity returns to higher than 40%.

Sometimes it's not you, it is an unseen force at work.  But now?  You know to take that into consideration if you experience wild swings in relative humidity where you live.

Soap Box Time

 

upright posture (recommended)

not upright (not recommended)

Once again I see someone pictured online sitting in a way that isn't 'healthy' or kind to their body.

Generally they are sitting in an ordinary kitchen chair, too low, having to lift their shoulders in order to weave.  Oftentimes they are weaving on a table top loom, which means neck/shoulder strain, needing to reach well above their shoulders to change the sheds, adding more stress and strain, and crane their necks awkwardly.

They weave for a while and then they hurt.

Instead of changing their physical surroundings, they think that weaving is too hard on their bodies.  Well, when it's done in a way that ignores the ergonomics of body function, it's true.  Weaving hurts.

The same with floor looms, though.  Generally people sit too low, in a chair than isn't engineered to be used for weaving, and their hips and lower back hurts from treadling, their shoulders and neck hurt from the shuttle throwing and beating of the weft.

People complain about their shuttles, ask for advice, which people are delighted to give.  Without ever mentioning the considerations that need to be kept in mind - are their hands small or large?  What kind of weft are they using?  They get tired of needing to change the bobbins so they opt for one of those huge rug weft shuttles which weigh a lot more than an 'ordinary' shuttle and then find their arms hurt after throwing and catching it for a while.  Their shoulders and neck hurt too, if they stop and think about what they are doing - using muscles that haven't been used much, and certainly not in that kind of motion, over and over and over again, until fatigue makes them stop.  And sometimes they wind up with soft tissue injuries.

Weaving is *physical*.  We use our bodies as an integral part of the process.  Keeping going beyond the body capacity for that motion, done hundreds of times, is damaging.  And it is much easier to prevent soft tissue injury than it is to heal from soft tissue injury.  Plus, once injured, those muscles are prone to further injury.

As a new weaver my best advice is to learn from someone who is experienced, *and who follows ergonomic practices*.  I know lots of weavers who have been weaving for decades in a way that would lead someone else who may have a history of inflammation, to develop soft tissue injury.  Just because it doesn't hurt *them* doesn't mean that others might not fare nearly so well.  

If anyone wants to know how I do it, I have video clips on You Tube, or if you want a more detailed explanation, both my classes on School of Sweet Georgia and Long Thread Media discuss what I do.  I cover the information in The Intentional Weaver.

If you want good information, find a good teacher, not AI.  Just sayin...

School of Sweet Georgia

Long Thread Media

The Intentional Weaver (use coupon GIVINGTUES25 until Dec. 11 for discount)

Winding Warps

 

Warp winding station

Close up of cross

More angst on line about warp winding, warp beaming, general dissatisfaction with the whole warp dressing process.

Warping is not difficult, but is *is* complex.  It is a process fraught with invisible considerations - a combination of physics and well, what appears to be 'magic' when someone who is good at it, does it.

But it isn't magical.  It is a precise series of steps that needs to be done in order, consistently, applying tension when necessary and controls that do not hinder the process, but enable the weaver to precisely get the job done.

It is not helped by getting frustrated, but examined and adjusted to better suit the situation at hand.

In other words...it depends.

I see all sorts of comments and they are all fine - as far as they go.  But hardly anyone tells why they do what they do.  

Here is my attempt to explain what I do, and why.

1.  Warping station

I place the board so that it is solidly against the wall.  It doesn't shift around or wobble. I can wind with some tension (not a lot, just to keep things happy) and press each pass of the yarn down towards the base of the peg.  I do not overlap the threads but place them beside the ones that have gone before which keeps each pass of the yarn pretty close to even - in tension and therefore length.  When I press them towards the base, some of the threads closer to the base might overlap, but they do that by increasing their tension in order to climb over/under the previous ends.  Once they are released from that path, they go back to the same tension and length as the other passes.

2.  Generally I use two ends at a time.  In the first photo you can see the two tubes each standing on a peg to keep the yarn stable and evenly winding off the spool because each end is threaded through a reed that takes the yarn up off the tube, centered.  Each yarn can balloon outwards without catching on each other or anything else.  This keeps the yarn from spiraling out evenly tensioned, not catching and jerking on its journey to the warping board.  I set each tube so that it empties in the same direction, in my case to come off the tube in a counter clockwise direction.  Whatever you do, be consistent.

3.  I keep a finger between the pair of ends as I find the yarn comes off the tubes smoothly.  Some people don't and say they don't have any issues.  Personal choice.  The cross is a 2x2 cross.  By doing two ends at a time I halve the time I need to spend winding the warp.  I find that using 2 ends in a pass generally makes things go more smoothly, especially if the yarn is a bit hairy or textured.

4.  I count out as many threads as I need in an inch or so.  In this case the epi will be 20 so 10 passes or 20 threads in a 'bundle'.  I use a counting string of a thicker yarn, contrasting in colour.  The thicker yarn is made even thicker by trebling or doubling and doubling (for 4 strands in the bundling yarn) and then as I complete each bundle of one inch (or whatever is appropriate for the warp) I twist the two ends of the bundling string to create a X between the previous bundle and the next.  Continue to done.  (If more than 15" in width in the reed, I will wind two chains.)

5.  When the warp is wound, I tie a single 'knot' to secure the counting string.  The yarn is hairy enough that is all that is required, so it is easy to pull gently on one of the 'strings' to loosen the knot and quickly and easily removed the string when it is time.  

6.  Tying the cross is done by tying the entire (half) warp above or below the cross with a single string, bundled in the same way as the counting string.  I do not tie the actual waist of the cross because I find that compresses that area and makes it more difficult to separate the threads later.

7.  Then the choke tie is tied, about 18" or so from the cross.  See second photo for a close up shot.

For this tie, the whole point is to secure the warp chain and discourage it from sliding around and becoming messy.  So I do the same thing with the choke tie and introduce a twist into the chain about 1/3 of the way through, then another 2/3s of the way into the chain, and then I pull very firmly on the tie to make sure the yarn is trapped as much as possible in the tie.

8.  Take one more close look at the warp chain.  Does it look correct?  All the ties have been tied?  Then cut the warp yarns off (they can be loose, the counting string will control the threads).  Pull the bottom peg out and then carefully drop the warp into a box/bin for the next step.

No, I don't chain the warp.  Notice I did not tie any other part of the warp.  This warp is only 5 meters, and really doesn't need any gathering ties.  Notice I did not say 'choke' ties.  When I *do* tie along the length of a longer warp.  I don't tie them very tightly, just enough to prevent yarns from straying from their path, too much.

Also note, I do not have studio pets that will be tempted to stick their nose or claws into my yarns.  Your mileage may vary.

Truth be told, it is taking me longer to type this out than actually winding the warp.  

If anyone wants more info on warp beaming and warping valets, I have plenty of posts - just use the tag in the long list of tags and click on warping valet.  I've written multiple times about the process I use, and people constantly question why I do what I do.  Isn't it annoying?  Fiddly?  Confusing?  No.  No.  No.  What it does is give me consistent results that provide for happy weaving.

What will that look like for you?  Don't know.  Everyone gets to choose what they want to do.  So if something I do doesn't resonate with someone else?  I am not the weaving police.  If you are happy, bless you.  If you are not?  Maybe think about what you are doing and start to examine your processes, maybe change a few things.

One last thing - I don't aim to control every single individual thread in a warp.  A warp is a collective.  There may be tiny differences, but for most handweavers in the 21st century, they are not end of the earth failures.  Most times a little faith will go a long ways towards successfully completing a project.  And take some time to be thoughtful about what you are doing.  Only then will you really learn what you need to do.  And of course, change one thing?  And everything can change.  

Understanding that one simple principle will go a long way towards understanding what you are doing, and when you might need to change something to better serve your objectives.

The End of the Year

 

I must be a pagan from another age because the solstice as 'end of year' makes a lot more sense to me than Dec. 31.

For decades I would arrive at the solstice completely exhausted.  The bulk of my income for the year would be generated, one way or another, by the time of the solstice and I would tend to go into a kind of stasis and begin to re-charge my batteries for the coming new year.

Things have changed little since 'retirement' (for certain values of) and frankly I have almost no energy or desire to grab the new year and let it drag me along with it.

Yesterday was challenging.  It was not unexpected, but draining, nonetheless.  And it will lead to more 'work' for Doug when he's already taking care of me full time.

I had hoped by now to be feeling better after the last procedure, but I'm not.  Every day is more of a challenge than I prefer to deal with.  Beginning to feel like Sisyphus, dragging myself out of bed, grab that gigantic rock of my life and start rolling it up the hill.  (Typo made that 'hell' and I nearly left it.)

The grey dreary days don't help.  The current political climate (not to mention the actual climate) make the days lengthen before me.  I hold onto the thought that beginning in about two weeks the sun will begin it's return journey northwards and spring surely awaits with its promise of life and renewal. 

I am preparing to begin work on the next article for WEFT, but we got sidetracked by doing some de-cluttering, then yesterday happened and we have to re-calibrate to accommodate the events that wound up taking up most of Doug's day.  

But I am reminded there are good people out there, willing to lend a hand, lighten the load.  If we listen to a certain segment of the people, you would never know that the kindness of strangers, as well as neighbours, still exist.  But it does and we need to remember that, too.

Today I'm going to see if I feel up to winding the sample warp for the article.  Plus I'm hoping to get to the loom.  But we'll see.

Sending light and love to all.