Only now does it occur to me... DOWN PERISCOPE

Only now does it occur to me... that DOWN PERISCOPE may possess the lowest ratio of "overall quality in comparison to amount of Great character actors" from any comparable film.

I think most of us think of DOWN PERISCOPE as the moment in the 90s where our nation's thirst for the "submarine movie" peaked, having enjoyed THE HUNT FOR RED OCTOBER, CRIMSON TIDE, THE ABYSS... before beholding the Rob Schneider version.
 
 The Rob Schneider version.

Conversely, you may also think of this as "the time Kelsey Grammer put out the feelers to see what his post-'Frasier Crane' stock might be worth."
 
If we were to examine DOWN PERISCOPE through that lens, I think we'd find that it is not typical of his actual post-FRASIER output:  clearly he's found his new niche acting against type in the third installments of modern action franchises (X-MEN III: THE LAST STAND, THE EXPENDABLES 3).

Anyway, I've digressed from my original point, which is that DOWN PERISCOPE is indeed terrible, but that it contains performances by some of our finest character actors.  There's a certain cognitive dissonance that expresses itself when you're watching Rip Torn:

William H. Macy:

Bruce Dern:

and Harry Dean Stanton:

doing their best to deliver peabrained jokes about bird shit and penis tattoos.  Whew.

Film Review: HOMICIDE (1991, David Mamet)

Stars: 5 of 5.
Running Time: 102 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Joe Mantegna, Bill Macy, Ving Rhames, Rebecca Pidgeon, Ricky Jay.
Tag-line: "Powerful. Provacative. Controversial."
Best one-liner: "Don't die with a lie on your lips, homie."

As I watched HOMICIDE, I couldn't help but keep thinking of an exchange from Sergio Leone's FOR A FEW DOLLARS MORE: "It's a small world," remarks our steely hero, upon encountering an old nemesis. His enemy retorts, hissing- "Yesss... and very, very bad." HOMICIDE's world is nasty, brutish, short, and enveloped by grimy, 1950's-style municipal architecture. The station house is full of the same working class griping that characterized GLENGARRY GLEN ROSS: the job, the job, always about the job. Life is the job. Has the job changed or have the times changed? Fuck the job. Don't tell me how to do my job. It's Mamet doing what Mamet does best: Repetition. Con games. Insults. Sexualized insults. Racialized insults. Joe Mantegna is the eye of this storm. The film whirls around him, and as he spreads his sincerity too thin, he begins to whirl as well. (He also makes disquietingly frequent use of the exclamation, "Yo!," but I guess it was 1991, so it's okay.)

Bill Macy is total hardass with a mean 'stache and a meaner shotgun. The man is no milquetoast, and everyone besides Mamet needs to relearn that fact. He makes observations like "Hey, you're better than an aquarium, you know that? There's somethin' happenin' with you every minute!" and dispenses aphorisms like "Let me tell ya somethin' the old whore said- when ya start comin' with the customers, it's time to quit."

God bless you, Bill Macy. I'm still waiting for you to be enshrined as a national treasure.

Now HOMICIDE is about returning to one's roots- or at least what you THINK your roots should be. Or maybe what someone else thinks your roots should be. Clearly there is no masturbatory feelgoodery at the end of this line- the embracing of the mother culture leads only to manipulation and chaos.

Or maybe chaos just would have happened anyway. You're looking for easy answers? The answers are easy- just assume that everyone's a piece of shit, and then go from there. Five stars.

-Sean Gill

Film Review: PSYCHO (1998, Gus van Sant)

Stars: 3 of 5.
Running Time: 105 minutes.
Notable Cast or Crew: Ann Heche, Bill Macy, Vince Vaughn, James Remar (RENT-A-COP, THE WARRIORS), James LeGros (PHANTASM II, ACE HITS THE BIG TIME), Viggo Mortensen, Julianne Moore, Philip Baker Hall, Rita Wilson, Robert Forster (ALLIGATOR, VIGILANTE). Music by Bernard Herrmann and adapted by Danny Elfman. Cinematography by Christopher Doyle.
Tag-line: "Check in. Unpack. Relax. Take a shower."
Best one-liner: "She might have fooled me, but she didn't fool my mother."

Perhaps Gus van Sant wanted to prove that 'movie magic' doesn't necessarily reside on the duplicatable surface. Well, Gus: point taken. Like the clone of a human being would not possess the same memories (or soul), a nearly shot-for-shot remake (with the same script and Herrmann score) of PSYCHO is going to strike your average cineaste as ill-advised. [Gus does add a few flourishes (i.e., Mom Bates lets down her hair, murders are crosscut with subliminal flashes of gals in lingerie, rolling clouds, and cows (!).]

Or maybe it's a goat? It's only on screen for like 1/20 of a second.

But by no means is this "bad" bad. It's packed with talented actors, all trying their best: Bill H. Macy as Arbogast, Viggo Mortensen as the hayseedily sincere Sam Loomis, James Remar as the stern state trooper,

James LeGros as the car salesman, Philip Baker Hall as the sheriff, and Robert Forster as 'the guy who gets to explain everything at the end.'

Forster spells it all out.

Ann Heche (as Marion) is no Janet Leigh, and her haircut is pretty questionable, but she holds her own.

 

In the middle of all this is Vince Vaughn (a few years before he began exclusively playing himself) as NORMAN BATES. Wearing sort of queer-coded bowling attire and engaging in some dubious line readings, Vaughn is in wayyy over his head, and he knows it.

Consequently, the level of fear he exudes in each scene varies depending on how talented his costars are (note his heightened jumpiness around Bill and Viggo).

He does nail that final stare, though, so it's not a total loss.

Anyway, I guess Gus couldn't decide whether or not to have this thing take place in 1960 or 1998. Well, to be more accurate he did decide––the opening titles say "1998," but he neglected to tell his cast, all of whom seem to have costumed themselves. Julianne Moore, for example, rolls in with headphones, a backpack, and a hoody––pure 90's.

Mere seconds later, Bill Macy scoots in wearing a zany royal blue suit straight from the 50's. I guess Gus also neglected to tell Bill Macy that he wasn't playing Sky Masterson.

Viggo attempts to mentally reconcile the collision of 50's and 90's happening before his very eyes.

 
Macy is the best. And he really milks that stairwell tumble for all it's worth.



Nice! Three stars.