the hilarious daddy/daughter relationship between Meg Ryan and her red-blooded, football-and-Coors-loving American Army Colonel father, Sean Connery (!), who just happens to have a Scottish accent:
Daddy, you can't tell me not to date Mark Harmon
Yesh, I can...I've sheen SCHUMMER SCHOOL
and somehow portraying Mark Harmon as a Jean-Pierre Melville-style blasé badass.
Lookin' schnazzy in that High School letter jacket, bub
None of this is working in the least. The film's high-water mark is surely an all-too-brief sequence where a local meathead
decides to pick on Sean Connery at a seafood pub, which begins a (raw)bar-room brawl, ending with said meathead getting a faceful o' oysters!
Unused Connery one-liners: "I've got othah schellfish to fry!","Thish wohrld ish definitely not your oyschter, boy!"
After highlighting THE PRESIDIO's only praiseworthy moment, I must also point out its greatest crime: the complete and utter misuse of the brilliant character actress Jeanette "Vasquez from ALIENS" Goldstein,
who––though she is playing an MP and not a Space Marine––
certainly could have been given the opportunity for either character development or badassery, but in fact is given neither,
shot dead a mere six minutes into the movie. I expected better from you, THE PRESIDIO. At least there's always THE ROCK when I need to scratch that "Sean Connery-in-San Francisco" itch.