Only now does it occur to me... BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS (1980)

Only now does it occur to me... that James Cameron first encountered the "TERMINATOR font" while working for Roger Corman.

What we have here is a John Sayles (!) scripted, low-ish budget sci-fi remake of Akira Kurosawa's THE SEVEN SAMURAI, starring a hodgepodge of affordable actors, from Richard Thomas (THE WALTONS) to Robert Vaughn (THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN) to John Saxon (A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET) to Sybil Danning (REFORM SCHOOL GIRLS) to George Peppard (THE A-TEAM). It's more enjoyable than you might expect––slightly better than STARCRASH (1978) or KRULL (1983), but pretty much playing in the same "poor man's STAR WAR" sandbox. I rate it lower than FLASH GORDON (1980), if that says anything.

According to James Cameron (credited as co-art director), he was responsible for most of the film's special effects, which are quite impressive for the budget. For comparison, THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK had a $30.5 million budget, BATTLE BEYOND THE STARS had a $2 million budget, and there are several spaceships which easily look good enough to be in STAR WARS. (The same cannot be said for the sets, costumes, and makeup effects.)

Anyway, it's notable that this early Cameron effort uses the same font that Cameron would make famous in THE TERMINATOR (I cannot find any interview where this is mentioned––since he had such an outsize role in the art direction, production design, and special effects, it's possible he helped pick out the font.)

It's also where Cameron met composer James Horner,

and the two would go on to collaborate many times before Horner's death––from ALIENS to TITANIC to two AVATAR films. In all, quite a formative experience for the 25-year-old Cameron.

Only now does it occur to me... THE PELICAN BRIEF

Only now does it occur to me...  that you must repeatedly watch the following clip, apropos of nothing:

As far as 90s John Grisham movies with all-star casts go, I don't rate this one as highly as THE FIRM or THE CLIENT, but it's a nice Southern-Fried Hitchcock-style thriller (not to be confused with Crawdad-Lickin' Southern-Fried Sleaze-O-Rama, unfortunately) with a solid James Horner score and nice bit parts from the likes of John Lithgow, Anthony Heald, William Atherton, and Stanley Tucci.  Carry on.

RIP, James Horner

From discordant saxophone and wild steel drum action in COMMANDO to the quoting of Rachmaninoff (!) in THE WRATH OF KHAN; from the soaring heights of THE ROCKETEER to the labyrinthine depths of ALIENS––James Horner composed some of the most iconic scores of my childhood and beyond.  I've written of his films on a few occasions (COMMANDO, 48 HRS., PROJECT X, TITANIC, STAR TREK III), though not nearly enough.  Suffice it to say, he'll be dearly missed.

Only now does it occur to me... PROJECT X

Only now does it occur to me...  that even the presence of two legendary character actors known for playing some of the best assholes of the 80s can't save PROJECT X from the inwardly collapsing force of its own Lite Spielberg schmaltzitude.

The first character actor in question is Jonathan Stark, whose turn as Chris Sarandon's bullying sidekick in FRIGHT NIGHT cemented his status as one of the premiere dicks of the 80s.

Here, he's not all that villainous, per sé, but he's got this high-school bully expression plastered on his face at all times,

one that almost insinuates you're playing right into his hands with every word you say; as if the existence of everyone around him is merely an amusing set-up to a punchline he will eventually deliver.

He also gets bonus points for at one point winking and giving the air gun/'chk-chk' of approval to a chimpanzee.

The second is William Sadler (DIE HARD 2, HARD TO KILL, BILL & TED'S BOGUS JOURNEY) who is very disapproving of Matthew Broderick

 
and generally plays the stereotype of the unfeeling 80s scientist who would rather chase a chimp with a cattle prod than let Helen Hunt snuggle it out and teach it sign language.

William Sadler: over it.

And yeah, that's where the main issue is: this movie is not really about 80s bullies or evil scientists, it's more of a (well-intentioned) pro-animal rights fusion of E.T. and TOP GUN, but with little of the kitsch value that would imply.  I didn't hate it, but even these character actor favorites and an opening song called "Shock the Monkey" by Peter Gabriel couldn't penetrate the self-serious attitude.  Perhaps I'd feel differently if I'd seen this as a kid and not waited till 2014?  Still: nice work, Sadler & Stark!

Only now does it occur to me... TITANIC

Only now does it occur to me...  that the true enduring star of TITANIC is not Celine Dion, Kate Winslet's boobs

or Bill Paxton's wicked, pirate-y earring.

No, the true stars are the expressive, Svengali-ish, and immaculately waxed eyebrows of one William G. Zane, Esquire:

Now I hadn't seen TITANIC since in theaters way back in '97, and because my interest in The Zane Factor had been so amply reawakened by TALES FROM THE CRYPT: DEMON KNIGHT, I decided to give it another go.  As "Caledon Hockley," the moneyed gadabout in pursuit of villainy and a loveless marriage to Kate Winslet, Billy Zane gives one of the bitchiest, most cattily malevolent performances ever to grace a mainstream film that didn't star Joan Crawford or Faye Dunaway.  

Here he is using the whites of Kate's eyes to admire his own reflection:

  

 I dare you to prove me wrong.  That's totally what he's doing:

 

He dismisses Monet and Picasso as "fingerpainters":

Tries to buy off the man (DiCaprio) who saved his wife-to-be with a crisp twenty-dollar bill:

He judges you with judgey eyebrows:

 

Offers smarm-infused false comfort as the ship goes down:

 

 Goes full "Tim Curry" for a segment where he's a gun-toting madman:

 

Steals babies to get on lifeboats:

 

He steals scenes he's not even really in:

 

[And somewhere amongst all this Zanery (hey, "zaniness" was already taken) apparently there's an epic romance and a sinking ship, but that's really more of a subplot.]

He's even got one of the all-time great villains and fellow TWIN PEAKS alum David Warner (TIME BANDITS, TRON, STRAW DOGS, TIME AFTER TIME, MY BEST FRIEND IS A VAMPIRE) as his henchman.  When David Warner is playing second fiddle to you– goddamn, you're doing something right!  One of my favorite moments is this wonderful bit where Warner catches Leo and Kate doing some unauthorized folk-dancing hanky-pankery:

His disapproving look is worth at least three AVATARS.  

BONUS!:  Also of note to Cameron aficionados– there's two great ALIENS references.

1.   Legendary badass Space Marine Vasquez (Jenette Goldstein) shows up as an immigrant mother from the lower decks

comforting small and adorable children (instead of using a swivel-mounted minigun to rain death and destruction on those blocking her access to the lifeboats).

2.  When Kate Winslet gives Billy Zane the ole' spit-in-the-eye treatment, instead of saliva, they used K-Y Jelly:

 

 

Incidentally, they also used K-Y in ALIENS to make the Alien Queen look like the world's most terrifying, lacquered sex toy.  To hear Zane talk about it (and the 27 traumatic takes therein) on OPRAH, go here, to the eleven minute mark.

Film Review: STAR TREK III: THE SEARCH FOR SPOCK (1984, Leonard Nimoy)

Stars: 3 of 5.
Running Time: 105 minutes.

Tag-line: "Kirk must battle the Klingons to protect the Genesis Planet and save a friend's life..."

Notable Cast or Crew: William Shatner, DeForest Kelley, James Doohan, George Takei, Nichelle Nichols, Walter Koenig, Robert Hooks (PASSENGER 57, FLED), Robin Curtis (HEXED, BABYFEVER), Christopher Lloyd (BACK TO THE FUTURE, TAXI), John Larroquette (TALES FROM THE CRYPT: DEMON KNIGHT, NIGHT COURT), Miguel Ferrer (TWIN PEAKS, ROBOCOP, THE NIGHT FLIER), Judith Anderson (REBECCA, LAURA), Marl Lenard (ANNIE HALL, HANG 'EM HIGH).  Music by James Horner (COMMANDO, TITANIC).  Written by Harve Bennett (THE MOD SQUAD, STAR TREK II: THE WRATH OF KHAN).  Sound FX by Alan Howarth (John Carpenter's co-composer on ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK and BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA).

Best One-liner: "I.... have... had... enough of you!"

There's a well-known "odds and evens" rule of STAR TREK movies– that is, the even ones (WRATH OF KHAN, THE VOYAGE HOME, THE UNDISCOVERED COUNTRY) are good and the odd ones are bad.  Well, I'm here to tell you that that's not entirely true, although perhaps it will depend on your definitions of "good" and "bad," your enthusiasm for early 80s fashion, and your general interest in character actors.

 The SFX hold up, too.

I'll try to make this brief, so without further ado, here's SEVEN WAYS THE SEARCH FOR SPOCK SURPASSES ITS SHAMEFUL REPUTATION:

(spoilers ahead, but then again, it doesn't really matter)

#1.  Noted alcoholic Dr. McCoy being forced to order water at a bar, because he's sort of being possessed by quasi-deceased fuddy-duddy Spock.  (Oh, the indignity!)

  

Also of note:  this bar features a "Tribble" cameo:
 
a golden glitter glo-lamp (pictured in the second screencap), XANADU-meets-THE APPLE-style sci-fi disco barmaids, and some smoove lounge jazz.  ...A+!

 #2. Miguel Ferrer, celebrated portrayer of sleazebags and arrogant dicks, appears in a (very) bit part as the First Officer of the U.S.S. Excelsior.  In the universe of this movie, if the Enterprise is the band of scrappy misfits, the Excelsior is the equivalent of the pompous rich kids' baseball team.

 And even in the future, Ferrer still has a legendary stink-face.

#3.  As I promised:  John Larroquette as a sensible, semi-compassionate Klingon.

It's hard to tell it's even him under that makeup.  The whole thing is kinda bizarre (apparently Laroquette was a big STAR TREK fan), and for that I must applaud it.

#4.  Dame Judith Anderson, dragged out of retirement to play a Vulcan high priestess–  Wait, whuutttt?!?

Best known to me as the icy and terrifying "Mrs. Danvers" in Hitchcock's REBECCA,

she was an accomplished film and stage actress who here lent some weight to religious gesticulations on a set that looks straight out of THE NEVERENDING STORY (that's a compliment, by the way). 

While STAR TREK has a long, rich tradition of taking Shakespeare actors and placing them in costumes with varying degrees of silliness, I feel as if this deserves special mention.

#5.  Rockin' leather jackets.
 
Lookin' like a bunch of kool dads who escaped a late 70s sitcom, Shatner, DeForest Kelley, and George Takei partake in the unauthorized commandeering of the decommissioned Enterprise, which, in the STAR TREK universe, is definitely a crime.  But they do it in style– specifically in those rockin' leather jackets.  Later, just to amplify his bachelor-pad-badassery, Shatner pops his collar... TO THE MAXX!

 He's definitely ready for "the popped-collar zone."

#6.  An unexpected Christopher Lloyd performance!

He's no Khan– who could be?– but he does a fine job, and I'm a bit surprised that his performance isn't mentioned more in the annals of sci-fi character work.  He gives complexity to a character who, though brutish, is not merely a brute.  Also, he gets a nice scene where he strangles a tentacle to death.

Lloyd throttles an ersatz Sarlaac to the minor delight of his henchmen.

 The beauty of Lloyd's performance reaches its natural culmination when...


#7.  We are entreated to the majestic sight of a grief-stricken William Shatner kicking Christopher Lloyd in the face until he falls off a cliff ledge... and into a volcano.
 
"I..."
 
 
"...HAVE..."



"....HAD..."

 

"...ENOUGH OF YOU!"

To be fair, he had it comin'.  And that, ladies and germs, is worth the price of admission.  Three stars!

–Sean Gill