"The Brief Life of Billy Dynamite"
Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti - story, Vicente Alcazar - art, Walt Simonson and Laura Martin - cover
Five years and three weeks ago
A small boy, Billy, is sitting in the Black Mare saloon with his dad, Miles, and another man, Emmett. Emmett is talking to Billy about being careful with nitroglycerin and how Billy did real well blowing up the cats in the alley out back. Four masked gunmen come in from the storm to rob the saloon and Miles tells Emmett to get Billy out the back way. One of the gunmen steps forward and murders Miles. He then turns and kills Billy's mom. The robbers realize there isn't much money in the till and commence with robbing the patrons.
Emmett tells them the mine is normally shut down during the winter and just then the saloon doors slam open and a severed head bounces into the room. The head belongs to Jerome, the robber they left outside to stand guard. They start arguing about who is going to go outside when a bullet comes rocketing in through the door and catches Montgomery, one of the robbers right between the eyes. The doors swing open and there stands Jonah Hex!
With an animalistic growl, Billy rushes forward and kicks Montgomery's dead cranium as hard as he can. This produces a chuckle from Hex. Jonah tells Billy that the man is dead but Billy tells Hex to get away from him. The three surviving robbers kneel and lock their fingers behind their heads as Hex tries to restrain Billy. Billy looks around, spies Jonah's pistol and quickly liberates it from the holster and gets off four quick shots, killing the three robbers and injuring a patron.
Hex grabs the pistol away from the boy and says "Feel better?" Standing amidst the carnage, Billy replies that he does. Hex looks around and asks if the folks on the floor are Billy's ma and pa. Billy says that they are. Hex states that since he was late to the party he will see to it that the parents get a proper burying. Hex then tells Emmett to get off his ass and pour him a drink. Billy tells Hex that the drink costs a dollar. Hex is taken aback but ponies up the dollar.
Three weeks ago
Several men come riding into town and come up to the saloon. There is a man sitting outside (the fella that got his hand shot five years earlier) and he warns them that the Black Mare doesn't tolerate mischief. One of the men kicks the chair and topples the man to the porch. The five men walk in laughing and belly up to the bar. The leader, Evander, tells the woman behind the bar pouring drinks that they would like her to get up on the bar and display what's under her dress. She tells them the proper whores are over by the piano. They start to grab the drinks she is pouring and she tells them the drinks aren't for them, she'll get theirs in a minute.
Two men walk up to claim their drinks and Evander turns and busts the first man's jaw and the other descend upon him. Evander asks the woman about the show he asked for and she replies that she wishes that he hadn't done that. Evander doesn't understand why she is so upset and a voice says that her name is Fiona.
The men turn and there, standing in the middle of the saloon is Billy. He tells them he is Billy Dynamite and he wants them gone.... now! The gang starts laughing and Billy tells them he will ask politely for the last time. Evander walks over and tells Billy to get back to school and says he just might bend Billy over his knee and smack sense into him. Evander gets right into Billy's face and Billy takes the chance to light a small explosive and shove it into Evander's mouth and shoving him backwards.
Evander falls to the floor as the explosive goes off with an explosion of blood, rendering Evander with a damaged mouth and tongue. Fiona grabs a shotgun from behind the bar and tells the men to drop their guns and leave. They all exit at gunpoint.
Two weeks ago
The Black Mare Saloon is fully engulfed in flames. Fiona stands out in the street, flanked by two of the gang. She begs for mercy for Billy but they say that he blew off their brother's face. Billy is tied up, with several sticks of dynamite bound around him. They pick Billy up and throw him into the burning building. The explosion is much more massive than they bargained for as the saloon explodes with massive amounts of wooden shrapnel careening outward. A wooden stake shoots out and kills one of the men. They pick themselves up and the men, now numbering seven quickly leave, but not before noticing that Fiona is gone.
One week ago
Jonah Hex is getting a shave at a barber when Fiona comes in and starts tearing him up one side and down the other. The barber leaves and then we hear Fiona screaming about money. It's obvious that Hex has asked for payment. Hex says that he doesn't do charity and she reminds him they were both there five years ago when Billy's parents were killed. Hex even paid for the funerals.
Jonah says he was late but that is how life his. Fiona says that she remembers Hex saying he was late five years ago and that got her to thinking that he knew those men were in town and knew what they were up to. She asks him WHY he was late. Hex replies that how should he know, as he lifts a bottle to his lips. Fiona slaps the bottle out of his hands saying it's ten in the morning and he is getting drunk. She claims that Hex was drunk that day and waited until he was sober before he took action and now a whole family is dead. She storms out.
Hex stands there looking at his busted bottle, denying that anything is his fault.
Now
Hex stands in a grove of trees, Evander and all of his brothers and gang are tied, upside down, to the trees, each with several sticks of dynamite placed below them. All the leads are running to a plunger. Hex tells them that the fault in the whole situation lies in the fact they are bunch of revenge-seeking child killers. Hex also states that they would have crossed paths even without Hex having known Billy. They are all wanted men and that is the business that Hex is in. The problem they are in is that the wanted posters read 'Dead', not 'Dead or Alive' so their innocence will be unproven, much like how Fiona passed judgement on Hex. Jonah picks up the plunger and retires to a safe distance behind some logs as the men are screaming and pleading, saying there won't be anything left for the bounty. The finally realize their fate is not based on any bounty that Hex can collect and the story ends as it began, with an explosion.
Statistics for This Issue
Men Killed by Jonah - Nine
Running Total - 893 (432 past, 55 future, 15 Vertigo, 391 V2)
Jonah's Injuries - Slapped by Fiona.
Timeline - Five years and three weeks.
Rape Percentage - 20% (11 of 55)
Men Killed by Jonah - Nine
Running Total - 893 (432 past, 55 future, 15 Vertigo, 391 V2)
Jonah's Injuries - Slapped by Fiona.
Timeline - Five years and three weeks.
Rape Percentage - 20% (11 of 55)
Wow, so much to talk about with this one. Since the dynamite plunger was invented in 1878, we can place the end of the story probably 1879 at the earliest, with the start of the tale occurring then in 1876.
Next up is the cover by Walt Simonson, I have always enjoyed his work (especially his run on Metal Men) and this is his first work of Jonah. Pretty dynamic, this one.
Then we have interior art by Vincente Alcazar. Last time we saw him was back in 1979, 31 years ago. and he is currently 81. Good job all around. My only gripe is the depiction of Billy. It is dang hard to draw kids convincingly and the five year old Billy looks a lot like ten year old Billy. Oddly enough, the last time Jonah ran into a kid with dynamite was back in Jonah Hex #13 and THAT was a kid named Billy!!!
I also enjoyed the extended time frame of this story, with the origin of Billy, Hex's involvement (or lack thereof) in the creation of Billy, Fiona tracking Hex down and reading him the riot act. What I found especially intriguing was the manner that Jonah tied those seven men up to the trees. I suspect that he had three of them, at gunpoint, tie up the first four and then someone got the last three in that position. The "Ah, hell..." at the end was a very nice touch.
While scanning for this post I realized there was one panel that really stood out to me. The third panel here made great use of negative space, using white to portray the snowstorm outside.
So I would put this one at the top of the list for well crafted stories.
Next Issue: We get two stories and a Jonah Hex movie interview!!!