Justice League Unlimited #19 "The Justice Rangers Ride Again!"

Justice League Unlimited #19 May 2006
"The Justice Rangers Ride Again!"
Adam Beechan, story - Gordon Purcell and Bob Petrecca, art - Ty Templeton, cover

1879.
Jud Saunders rides as hard as he can across the American West to elude the men chasing him, the men with cowboy hats and ray-guns. He is just about cornered when three men come to his rescue, Bat Lash, El Diablo, and Jonah Hex.

Current Day.
On the Justice League satellite, The Vigilante and Elongated Man are helping Wonder Woman inventory the trophy room. Vigilante is admiring an hourglass when he is startled by Ralph Dibny and drops the hourglass, shattering it and opening up a time vortex.

Naturally, they end up in 1879 Wyoming right in the middle of our western heroes being chased by the bad guys. Wonder Woman is startled to see Hex, Lash and Diablo. Ralph asks if she knows these guys and Wonder Woman explains that she, Batman and Green Lantern once... "well, never mind. It's time travel. It's complicated."

The bad guys realize they are overpowered and they take off, leaving the heroes to talk over what caused the ruckus. Jud explains that he was just mining his own business playing cards in Laramie when those guys came in and shot up the place. Bat grabs Jud and asks if Jud had cheated them the way he cheated Bat in Dodge last month. Jud denies that he cheated but Bat states "There's no way you pulled that fourth ace on the draw cause I had palmed it two hands before." But Bat won't let anyone hurt Jud until he can get back the rabbit's foot that he lost in the game.

Vigilante notices that Jud's last name is Saunders and asks if he is married to Kitty Wilcox Saunders. Jud says he ain't married but he has visited Kitty Wilcox in Carson City. Vigilante starts to explain the relationship between he and Jud, but Wonder Woman intervenes and says that they can't say too much since it could cause a time paradox.

Ralph then brings up the fact that the bad guys had been shooting laser pistols. Wonder Woman asks Vigilante if his family had ever been involved with someone named Starr and he stats that they did. She then theorizes that the hourglass was destroyed in their time but the vortex brought them back to a time where the glass still exists and since it is here then they could possibly use it to get back to their own time.

Anyway, she now knows that they are facing off against the Time Commander.

It is this Time Commander who is back at the bunkhouse with his bunch of bad guys. He goes on a tirade explaining how the Vigilante foiled his plans in 2009 so he came back here to get rid of Jud Saunders, he gets weapons for the bad guys to use but Time keeps trying to correct itself. To counteract this, the Commander goes hopping through time and returns with some more advanced weaponry... heavily armed robot suits!

That night, Diablo is mad at Bat for dragging him into trying to recover property that Bat lost while cheating, Jonah is talking to Diana and telling her that they will stick around until everything is cleared up and Ralph and Vigilante are discussing meeting your own ancestors and not mucking up the Time Stream. While everyone is discussing their next step the bad guys show up in their robot suits!

Ralph springs into action and wraps himself around one of the villains. Jonah gets into a Mexican standoff with another and does his best Clint Eastwood impression...

and Wonder Woman cleans up the last of them. Time Commander has been watching it all from a nearby hilltop and right before he can escape, Jud tackles him and knocks him down. Commander jumps up and states that he will send Jud back to the Dawn of Time but Jud has 'picked the pocket' of the Commander and now has possession of the hourglass!

All the bad guys are easily tied up and Wonder Woman tells Jonah how they will return to their own time..

Our current heroes return to the JLA satellite with Time Commander in tow and in the closing panels Vigilante starts feeling better about his contributions to the team.

Statistics for This Issue

Well, Jonah didn't kill anyone or get hurt, so a big zero on both of those counts!

It was kinda nice how Jonah took the whole time travel thing in stride, a nice little wink to his own adventures skipping across the time stream. The story was light-hearted, nothing to write home about, but it did a good job of giving everyone the same amount of 'screen time'. The whole story is a sideways redo of the Justice League Unlimited cartoon "The Once and Future Thing Part 1: Weird Western Tales" and that isn't a bad thing. It's nice to have this in book form.

House Ads #36

 

Batman front and center on a JLA cover? Must be the 1960's!! (or 2010's)

Justice League of America #160 "Crisis from Tomorrow!"

Justice League of America #160 Nov 1978
"Crisis from Tomorrow!"
Gerry Conway, story - Dick Dillin & Frank Mclaughlin, art - Dick Dillin & Dick Giordano, cover

The story starts off with Superman, Wonder Woman & Flash all on the Cosmic Treadmill and dragging along Huntress, Elongated Man, Dr. Mid-Nite, Hawkman & Star-Spangled Kid. We get a one page recap and then we are in 3786 where the Lord of Time is really really worried. Just then the five heroes from the past (Jonah Hex, Viking Prince, Miss Liberty, Black Pirate and Enemy Ace) all attack the Lord of Time's castle.

The five manage to break down the castle door but the super smart computer grabs a T-Rex from the past to attack the five. Jonah's pistol makes a ZAROOM sound effect (must be hollow point bullets). As Enemy Ace attacks the dino, the remaining four use this chance to rush the castle. But the computer pulls in several hundred reptilian apes from the future and all five are defeated.

Now the Lord of Time's only hope of stopping his own creation is for the JLA to show up. Back on Earth, Aquaman is talking to the doctor taking care of the fallen JLA/JSA members. He ends up going to get some special equipment.

Back in the future, the runners on the Cosmic Treadmill slam into a a wall in time. They can't find a way through until Wonder Woman throws Superman like a javelin through the wall. This, however, knocks out Superman. Our heroes find the LoT's castle and Hawkman is shot out of the sky by lasers. Wonder Woman is the next to fall, getting hit by another laser. The Flash vibrates part of the castle wall to dust and gets inside but is attacked by a pterodactyl and is knocked out.

The super computer states that the heroes will fall within 8 minutes and the stoppage of time will start in 9 minutes. A huge robot from the future beats the crap out of SSK, Huntress and Dr. Mid-Nite. The Elongated Man, emoting about how he is outclassed manages to trip the robot and it falls apart. He then finds the computer and the Lord of Time. E-man decides to short circuit the computer using...himself?!?!?! The thing blows up and Ralph Dibny saves the day.

Epilogue: Everyone is healed thanks to blah blah blah yakkity blah blah..

Statistics for this issue:
Men killed by Jonah: None
Jonah's Injuries: He gets knocked out by reptilian apes from the future. ( Do I actually add this to Jonah's Injury list?)
Timeline: Well, in these two issues Jonah winds up in 1978 and 3786.

Again, for a Hex story, it sucked. Here is all of Jonah's dialogue:

Justice League of America #159 "Crisis from Yesterday!"

Justice League of America #159 Oct, 1978
"Crisis from Yesterday!"
Gerry Conway, story - Dick Dillin & Frank McLaughlin, art - Rich Buckler & Dick Giordano, cover

It's hard to understand why this book was published around the same time as the Jonah Hex Spectacular. It's like they had to balance the best Jonah Hex story with the worst Jonah Hex story.

Oh lord, where do I start? I wanted to love the JLA during this time and I suffered through the Dick Dillin art. I never ever enjoyed anything that this man drew but this was the annual JLA/JSA team-up, so I had to buy it.

Also, Jonah Hex was on the cover. I slammed down my 50 cents and dove into the book. Then I threw up in my mouth...a lot. But I shouldn't attempt to sway the jury on this one.

The JLA & JSA are meeting in Club 22 on Earth-1. There is a lot of partying and emoting, some of which I will describe here:

• Batman, looking at Huntress wonders what it would be like to get married and wonders if he envies his Earth-2 counterparts retirement or his child?
• Green Arrow & Hawkman get drunk and become all palsy-walsy
• Elongated Man gives publicity advice to the Star-Spangled Kid
• Oh, the wall explodes and Superman has a chance to shout "Who are THEY?!?!?!"

Then we break to 3786 in another dimension. The Lord of Time is talking to his huge living computer. The computer is telling the LoT that it has successfully nabbed 5 people from the past and dropped them in July 15, 1978. LoT rattles on about being able to use the computer to build this refuge outside the time-stream where he could work his horrible plans. Plans that include learning how to stop time itself. Of course, LoT orders the computer to stop time and then realizes that he can't recind the order or tell the computer to put things back. The stoppage of time will result in.... something too horrible for the LoT to even think about.

LoT then devised a plan of snatching 5 heroes from the past, give them super-powers and have them attack the JLA/JSA.

We return to 1978 to see a tri-plane, two flying horses and a flying viking ship cause the building to collapse onto the JLA/JSA and defeat them. Then we are introduced to Viking Prince, Jonah Hex, Enemy Ace, Miss Liberty, & The Black Pirate. They all recount how they were abducted from their own times, brought together and then ordered to fight our heroes. They also talk about how they can understand each other but they also heard a voice that gave them orders, but none of them can remember what the voice said. The five heroes do a minor freak out and Miss Liberty suggests they go to a place she knows where they can figure this out.

Moments later, Superman busts out from under the rubble of the collapsed restaurant. He helps uncover several of the other heroes. Oddly some of them seem to suffer from some kind of Conway-Coma. Wonder Woman of Earth-1, Black Canary, Green Arrow, & Hawkwoman are all taken to a nearby hospital, while the remaining heroes follow a chronal energy trail that Superman has detected.

Flash, Huntress, Dr. Mid-Nite, Elongated Man & Wonder Woman (Earth-2) pile into Wonder Woman's invisi-jet while Hawkman, Superman and the Star-Spangled Kid fly alongside. They end up at Valley Forge and end up getting attacked by Viking Prince and the Black Pirate riding a flying Viking Boat. Viking Prince manages to lay the smackdown on Flash and Black Pirate cuts down Wonder Woman and Elongated Man. Superman, Hawkman & SSK end up on the losing end of Jonah Hex, Enemy Ace & Miss Liberty. The Huntress and Dr. Mid-Nite don't fare well either.

At the end, all of our heroes are unconscious and the five from the past are sent to 3786. The five are placed on a statis-shelf outside the LoT castle and everything fits into the LoT's plan. LoT knows that when the JLA/JSA suffers a beatdown, they rally and come back stronger than ever. He is banking on them being able to defeat his computer because in five hours the computer will stop all of time and it will never get started again.

Statistics for this issue:
Men killed by Jonah: It's a JLA book!!! zero
Jonah's Injuries: None, he's a guest star
Timeline: Who really cares?

This story stinks, but you want to know about Jonah, don't you? Here is all of Jonah's dialogue:


Yup, that makes me want to rush out & start reading Jonah Hex.

Next Issue: Believe it of not, it gets worse. Yup, they bring in a toad-frog from Hell.