PLANET TERROR / DEATH PROOF -- Movie Reviews by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 10/21/09. Contains spoilers.

 

If you grew up going to big, dark, seedy movie theaters or rundown drive-ins that showed battered, tattered, spliced-and-diced prints of cheap exploitation flicks--and loving every minute of it-- then Robert Rodriguez' incredibly well-rendered homage to all that great stuff, PLANET TERROR (2007), just might be more fun than you can handle. 

 Originally part of the Rodriguez-Tarantino team-up GRINDHOUSE, which also featured QT's roadkill thriller DEATH PROOF, PLANET TERROR now stands alone on DVD in an extended, unrated version that is pure adrenaline-fueled goofy fun from beginning to end. 

The movie plunks us smack-dab into the old grindhouse atmosphere right off the bat with original "prevues of coming attractions" and "our feature presentation" clips, along with a kickass, spot-on trailer parody for a fictitious flick called MACHETE starring the ever-popular Danny Trejo as a blade-wielding badass for hire. It's only a couple of minutes long, but it contains enough outrageous action clips and gravely-intoned taglines ("If you're going to hire him to kill the bad guy--you'd better make damn sure the bad guy isn't YOU!") to make us wish it was a real movie. (Which it soon will be, apparently--according to IMDb, Rodriguez is preparing MACHETE for an 2010 release.) 

After a vintage clip informing us that the following movie is intended for adults only, PLANET TERROR kicks in full blast with a title sequence featuring scantily-clad star Rose McGowan doing a very energetic pole-dance in a seedy Texas club. Holy G-strings, Batman! I don't know how you'll react, but it got my full attention. Rose is definitely lookin' good these days. 

Her character, Cherry Darling, quits the club in the not-too-likely hope of becoming a stand-up comedian. On the walk home she's almost run over by a convoy of vehicles on its way to an abandoned military base. Here, a shady deal goes down between greedy scientist Abby (Naveen Andrews, "Lost") and a group of renegade soldiers led by Lt. Muldoon (Bruce Willis) concerning a mysterious toxic gas called DC-2. The soldiers, it turns out, have been exposed to the gas and now need to inhale it in measured doses to counteract its horrific effects. But the deal erupts into a bloody gunfight, and before long a cloud of DC-2 is headed toward town. 

Meanwhile, Cherry runs into her old lover Wray (Freddy Rodríguez, "Six Feet Under") in a roadside barbecue joint called The Bone Shack, which is run by the grizzled J.T. Hague (an almost unrecognizable Jeff Fahey). Cherry bums a ride home in Wray's wrecker truck, but they're attacked by some flesh-eating DC-2 zombies who make off with Cherry's right leg. 

At the hospital, soon-to-become-zombies are pouring into the emergency ward, where Josh Brolin is doing his best Nick Nolte imitation as the burnt-out, hypochondriac Dr. Block. Block is preoccupied by the fact that his wife, Dakota (Marley Shelton, SIN CITY) is having an affair with another woman played by "Fergie" of the Black-Eyed Peas, Stacy Ferguson. But he'll have more pressing concerns on his hands when the hospital begins to fill up with pus-spewing, gut-chomping zombies. 

Wray gets hauled off to jail by Sheriff Hauge (Michael Biehn), who has had previous legal troubles with him. The sheriff is J.T.'s brother, and one of the funniest running gags in the film is him desperately trying to coerce J.T. into sharing his secret barbecue sauce recipe with him. But while he's booking Wray for whatever he can think of, zombies strike the police station in force and there's another extremely bloody battle. Wray eventually makes his way back to the hospital to rescue Cherry, ramming a table leg onto the end of her stump in lieu of a more traditional prosthesis. 

The "Lt. Dan"-style missing-leg effects are awesome here, especially when Wray later replaces the table leg with a machine gun/grenade launcher that turns Cherry into one of the coolest warrior women in movie history. Yet another awesome shoot-em-up scene occurs at the besieged, flame-engulfed barbecue joint, where the non-infected survivors have congregated and we discover that Wray is really El Wray. The significance of this is never explained (not only does the film "melt" during the big sex scene, but there's actually a missing reel!) but it's enough to convince Sheriff Hague, who tells his deputy, "Give him a gun. Give him all the guns." 

The survivors' flight down the highway in whatever escape vehicles they can scrounge up is a thrilling sequence highlighted by the sheriff bashing zombie pedestrians to bloody smithereens in Wray's wrecker while Wray heads the convoy on a tiny pocket bike. The finale occurs at the old military base after they've all been detained by Lt. Muldoon and his renegade soldiers. Tarantino turns up as a lecherous psycho who tries to act out his women-in-cages fantasies with Cherry and Dakota, and ends up "getting the point", so to speak. His performance has been derided by some, but Tarantino knows exactly what kind of character he's playing and does it to a tee. (He also gets to perform the film's biggest gross-out scene, and boy, is it gross.) 

The good guys eventually escape from their cells and battle their way toward a helicopter, and not only does everything blow up real good but Cherry gets a mind-boggling opportunity to display her newly-developed battle skills in one of the coolest scenes ever. All of this weird, wild stuff is wrought with all the directorial skills, grindhouse nostalgia, and giddy Monster Kid glee that Robert Rodriguez can muster. Once this thing gets started, it's non-stop over-the-top action all the way, drenched in gouts of fake blood 'n' guts and brimming with all the wonderful 70s exploitation elements Rodriguez can cram into it. 

Stylistically, it's a near-perfect homage, complete with scratchy film, bad edits and splices to give it the look of an old, battered print that's been shown too many times, arch dialogue, and special effects that are well-rendered while being intentionally cheesy-looking. With the DVD's audience-reaction track activated, which to me is the only way to watch this film, it's like sitting in a cheap theater back in the old days. Rodriguez' conviction to go all the way with this concept has resulted in one of the most fun movies I've ever seen. 

The entire cast is outstanding. Michael Parks returns as Texas Ranger Earl McGraw, a character that has appeared in Rodriguez' FROM DUSK TILL DAWN and Tarantino's KILL BILL and is further developed here. Gore makeup master Tom Savini and the original "El Mariachi" himself, Carlos Gallardo, appear as deputies. Rodriguez' twin nieces, Elise and Electra Avellán, play the Crazy Babysitter Twins, who should definitely be in their own movie. And his son Rebel does a nice job as the Blocks' young son, Tony, who loves tarantulas and scorpions but should never be trusted with a gun. 

This DVD is one of the best Christmas gifts I ever got. Rarely have I had this much pure, unadulterated fun watching a movie. Of course, if you're one of those people who post on IMDb asking puzzled questions like "what's with all the scratches?" or pointing out all the obvious "goofs" and "gaffes", this movie probably isn't for you. But if you're an old-school flick fan who gets what Robert Rodriguez is up to here from the git-go, then chances are PLANET TERROR is an exploitation extravaganza that will be held over for an extended run in your home grindhouse theater.  

 

Having gone ga-ga over PLANET TERROR, I couldn't wait to see the other half of the GRINDHOUSE double-feature he and collaborator Quentin Tarantino unleashed on widely unsuspecting audiences in '07. QT's muscle-car mayhem epic DEATH PROOF, while not as over-the-top awesome as Rodriguez' film, is still a pure, giddy joy that revels in the down and dirty delights of its low-budget inspirations. 

We're first introduced to four lovely young wimmins cruising the Tex-Mex diners and bars of Austin, Texas, yakking endlessly about guys and planning an all-girl party at Lake LBJ. There's the petite blonde, Shanna (Cheryl Ladd's daughter Jordan of HOSTEL PART II and CABIN FEVER), leather-clad tough chick Lanna-Frank (Monica Staggs), sexy Brooklyn gal Butterfly (Vanessa Ferlito), and locally-famous radio DJ Jungle Julia (Sydney Tamiia Poitier, Sidney's daughter). 

Rose McGowan, the star of PLANET TERROR, plays a smaller role here as Pam, Julia's grade-school rival who shows up at the Texas Chili Parlor run by Warren (Tarantino) while the girls are there partying with some horny guys that include a funny Eli Roth (HOSTEL). And, for the record, PLANET TERROR's ever-popular Crazy Babysitter Twins are there as well. 

Also sitting at the bar stuffing himself with nacho platters is the burly, scarfaced Stuntman Mike (Kurt Russell), a washed-up Hollywood stuntman who takes an interest in the girls and, through a series of circumstances, ends up getting a lap dance from Butterfly in a steamy set-piece. While Stuntman Mike seems friendly enough, there's something creepy and vaguely dangerous about him. 

But Pam needs a ride home and climbs into his black '69 Dodge Charger, which, as Mike tells her, is so heavily-reinforced for stuntwork as to be "death proof." This, however, only applies to the person behind the wheel, which Pam finds out to her immense regret as soon as they hit the street. 

The first half of DEATH PROOF has the same battered, scratchy, spliced-to-hell look of PLANET TERROR, which should bring back fond memories to anyone who's actually been in a grindhouse or watched a midnight show where the print was as old as they are. For me, the nostalgic joy began in the very first seconds as soon as I heard that awesome bass line from Jack Nitszche's VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS theme, otherwise known as "The Last Race." Then the title, which, for a split second, is "Quentin Tarantino's Thunder Bolt" until the words "DEATH PROOF" are crudely spliced in, mimicking the look of all those cheap films that have been re-released under different titles. Another jarring splice cuts the title sequence short and dumps us into the movie proper. 

 Later, reel changes are clearly heralded by splotchy indicators and one of the biggest moments of the film, Butterfly's lap dance for Stuntman Mike, ends abruptly due to missing footage. This is the kind of stuff that will mean nothing to a lot of viewers, and in fact seems to put many of them off--which is probably one of the main reasons public reaction to this movie has been so divided--but it makes me as giddy as a schoolgirl. 

What happens midway through DEATH PROOF is one of the most thrilling and totally unexpected scenes of recent years--I had to rewind and watch it two or three times just convince myself that this flabbergasting event really happened. Then, after a denouement which features yet another welcome appearance by Michael Parks' Texas Ranger character Earl McGraw, who got his brains blown out way back in FROM DUSK TILL DAWN but refuses to die, the movie blinks forward fourteen months and transports us to Lebanon, Tennessee, where Stuntman Mike is up to his old tricks again. 

This time, we meet four more young women who are in town for the making of a softcore "cheerleader" movie. Rosario Dawson (SIN CITY) is makeup artist Abbie, and Mary Elizabeth Winstead is the movie's cutie-pie star, Lee. Their two friends are hardcore stuntwomen Kim (Tracie Thoms) and real-life stuntwoman Zoë Bell, who plays herself. Zoë's dream is to drive a white 1970 Dodge Challenger with a 440 engine, just like the one in VANISHING POINT. 

 Sure enough, there's a guy in town with one for sale, and before long, the girls (minus Lee) are out for a pedal-to-the-metal test drive that includes a hair-raising stunt called "Ship's Mast" with Zoë sprawled across the car's hood. This, of course, is when Stuntman Mike makes a surprise reappearance, crashing into the Challenger and then trying to run it off the road in a prolonged, stunt-packed pursuit over rural roads and highways. 

 Having a real stuntwoman playing a main role adds to the excitement because we see her face the whole time and know she's really doing all of this dangerous and thrilling stuff herself. Tarantino also uses legendary veterans such as Buddy Joe Hooker and Terry Leonard for the driving stunts, allowing him to indulge his imagination with some of the most incredible set-ups ever filmed. "Adrenaline-charged" would be an apt way to describe this harrowing car chase sequence, all the way up to the truly kooky ending in which the girls turn the tables on ol' Stuntman Mike. 

 The battered-print look disappears in DEATH PROOF's second half, as though we're now seeing another kind of exploitation flick--perhaps the more upper-scale stuff (GONE IN SIXTY SECONDS, VANISHING POINT, et al) that Kim and Zoë like to gush about. One thing that remains consistent throughout the movie, though, is Quentin Tarantino's well-known obsession with female feet. If you're a foot fetishist too, you'll love this movie from the very first frame, as this appears to be Tarantino's substitute for the gratuitous "boob shots" often seen in the usual grindhouse fare. 

There's also an abundance of big butts, gorgeous legs, and stuffed shirts, all lovingly photographed by a gleefully leering QT. Sydney Tamiia Poitier, in particular, proves a highly photogenic focus for such directorial indulgence. I'm not complaining. 

I have heard complaints that much of the girls' dialogue scenes in this movie are too ponderous and not as witty or clever as the "royale with cheese"-type stuff from PULP FICTION. Me, I just like to hear Tarantino's characters talk, even when it isn't all deliciously quotable. These long yakkity-yak scenes also help us get to know the characters before they're subjected to extreme terror and peril by Stuntman Mike. As the crazed highway stalker, Kurt Russell is simply wonderful. Relaxed, jovial, but somehow not quite right, Mike is a great character and Russell is obviously having a ball playing him. 

Tarantino has already wowed the mainstream with RESERVOIR DOGS and PULP FICTION--here he's content to give us old-time, pre-multiplex movie fans like himself a thoroughly entertaining thrill ride down memory lane in a souped-up exploitation flick with a defiant get-it-or-don't attitude. Like PLANET TERROR, the other half of this heartfelt love letter to grindhouse fans, DEATH PROOF doesn't need mainstream acceptance to validate it or make it good. It's critic-proof.

 

 

PLANET TERROR / DEATH PROOF -- Movie Reviews by Porfle

THE SISSI COLLECTION -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

Originally posted on 11/6/17

 

There are some movies that you can either pass over for lack of initial interest, or find a way to plug into.  I plugged into THE SISSI COLLECTION and was shocked--so to speak--to discover how much I quickly came to enjoy this sparkling Technicolor trilogy of Austrian films (plus two bonus films and various extras) now available in a deluxe Blu-ray set from Film Movement, newly restored in 2K.

Seventeen-year-old Romy Schneider is a delight as the sweet, utterly unpretentious Sissi (short for "Elizabeth"), a wild child who only reluctantly plays the royalty game when protocol, and her socially-conscious mother, demand.  Otherwise, this countrified Bavarian princess would rather be fishing, riding horses, or hunting (although she never shoots but only likes to look at the animals) with her father, whose similarly rough and "improper" ways she has thoroughly inherited. 

In SISSI (1955), the first of the three films, Sissi and her mother, Duchess Ludovika (Romy's real-life mother Magda), along with her older sister Nene, travel to Vienna to meet the young Emperor, Franz Joseph (Karlheinz Böhm, PEEPING TOM), whose marriage to Nene has been prearranged. (We know early on that Franz is both a nice guy and a decent ruler when he refuses to sign the execution order for eight political prisoners until he's satisfied they're deserving of such a fate.)

It's a love story that harkens back to Cinderella, with the wicked stepmother replaced here by a not-so-bad mom hung up on royal protocol and one older sister, also not wicked, who gets first crack at the handsome prince (or in this case, emperor). 

He, of course, first meets Sissi after she furtively escapes the palace for some fishing, and falls madly in love with the wild girl, thinking her a lovely commoner. Naturally, there's a festive ball that evening to announce his engagement to Nene, where he discovers Sissi's real identity and proposes to her instead.  Comfortingly familiar complications ensue in which our only concern, really, is how well-meaning sister Nene is going to take such a potentially devastating humiliation. 

But greater trouble looms on the horizon in the form of Franz Joseph's stern, unyielding mother, Archduchess Sophie (Vilma Degischer), who will stop at nothing to sabotage her son's marriage to a girl she deems utterly unworthy.  Meanwhile, the fiercely independent Sissi, to her husband's great delight, proves not only a wonderful wife but also a wise and compassionate leader who unites their subjects while charming even his most obstinate political opponents.

One might describe SISSI with the old Hollywood term "woman's picture"--which, let's face it, it is--but it's definitely something anyone in the mood for light, sumptuous, and visually dazzling entertainment can sit back and enjoy.  The vast, incredibly lavish indoor sets are dripping with whatever constitutes "royalty", while the outdoor scenery of Austria and other locations are some of God's most deliriously colorful handiwork.

The wedding of Sissi and Franz Joseph, and all the attendant ceremony, are almost brain-fryingly opulent.  I've never seen anything like it--just as one scenario appears as dazzling as it can get, it's topped by the next jaw-dropping spectacle.

The humor is of the mildly amusing and gently satirical variety, a welcome change of pace from overt slapstick and farce.  The initial mistaken-identity factor is well-played as Sissi charms Franz Josef with her sincere qualities before he discovers her regal origins.  The romantic and political entanglements are similarly handled with just the right amounts of light humor, heartfelt sentiment, suspense, and clever storytelling.

Ernst Marischka's surehanded direction (he wrote and directed all three films in the trilogy), along with impeccable production values, superb costumes, and a swirling symphonic musical score, blend to give the film an almost lighter-than-air quality, like an expertly prepared cinematic confection.  Watching it is like digging into an entire Bavarian cream pie with a big spoon right out of the plate.
 
SISSI has a relaxing, almost soothing quality because it just wants to amuse and delight us instead of dragging us through raucous farce or hand-wringing melodrama.  It has a pleasing mix of reality and fairytale magic that, to my surprise, I found guilelessly appealing and effortlessly watchable.

SISSI: THE YOUNG EMPRESS (1956) picks up right where the first one left off (the three films play like a mini-series and should be seen as such) with the young couple still madly in love while coping with crucial international affairs.  Chief among these are the strained relations between Austria and Hungary, the latter personified by angry young rebel Count Andrassy (Walther Reyer), whom Sissi will eventually charm with her love of his country and genuine concern for its people.

Meanwhile, Franz Joseph's mother, Archduchess Sophie, continues to refer to Sissi as "a little Bavarian princess who became Empress by chance." When the couple are blessed with a daughter, Sophie drives a wedge between them by insisting on raising the girl herself, apart from the mother, an arrangement that drives Sissi to leave her husband when he sides with his mother on the issue.

This second installment forces Sissi to contend with more sinister and oppressive conflicts than before, elevating the series as a whole to to an entirely different dramatic plane.

Still, it also has even more mindblowing pomp and circumstance for us to wallow in than the previous one--it's almost like royalty porn. One particularly opulent ball reminds us how much more fundamentally impressive reality is over CGI, as this series, without a single pixel of digital FX, often outdoes the most heavily computer-generated spectacles of today.  (At some points I felt as though the deluge of undiluted cinematic grandeur would cause me to faint dead away.)

The ballroom scene is also particularly noteworthy for featuring the most politically volatile situation thus far--one which, to the Archduchess' chagrin, is beautifully and most satisfyingly resolved by Sissi's quick thinking.

Here and in subsequent scenes, all the magnificent visuals are in service to an uplifting, engaging story in which the Sissi character is more endearing than ever.  She ends up an even more grandiose figure than before, not out of a lust for power but because her sweet and caring nature cause an entire country to fall in love with her.

An even more dazzling explosion of color and richly-appointed finery than its predecessor, SISSI: THE YOUNG EMPRESS is as charming and utterly captivating as its radiant young star, Romy Schneider.  It's a bit like taking that rich Bavarian cream pie, shoving it right in your face, and loving every gooey moment of it.

SISSI: THE FATEFUL YEARS OF THE EMPRESS (1957) has all the qualities of the first two films, but by this time the series reaches new maturity along with its main character.  Having conquered Count Andrassy and the people of Hungary, Sissi sets her winning ways to new purposes even as her vile mother-in-law, Archduchess Sophie, tries to poison her marriage to Franz by suggesting to him that she's being unfaithful.



To make matters worse, Sissi is stricken with an unknown disease which the royal physician warns may be incurable.  While she's bedridden, the grief-stricken Franz Joseph must contend with a growing rift between Austria and Italy that will be accentuated by the cold reception he and Sissi receive upon their eventual state visit there.

Despite all the dramatic complications, this third SISSI adventure is brimming with more beautiful nature photography and some charming rural vignettes as the royal couple vacation incognito at a small mountain lodge in the Alps. (This is followed by some location photography during Sissi's visit to Greece.)

Later, there's a breathtaking view of a cavernous opera house in Milan where the invited Italian aristocrats express their disapproval of the visiting royal couple by ordering their lowly servants to attend in their stead. This leads to some delightful comedy as Sissi and Franz Joseph receive the delighted commoners as royalty at a reception following the opera. 

But best of all is the ending sequence which contains some of the most strikingly splendid imagery of the series as the royal couple's regal procession passes majestically through the picturesque canals and streets of Venice, to the eerie silence of its disapproving citizens.  A final surprise and a heartwarming wrap-up bring both SISSI: THE FATEFUL YEARS OF THE EMPRESS and the trilogy as a whole to a stirring conclusion.



Disc four of the Blu-ray set features the film VICTORIA IN DOVER, aka "The Story of Vickie" (1954), which predates the "Sissi" series by a year while serving as a blueprint for it by featuring a headstrong teenage girl, chafing against the burdens of royalty, suddenly finding herself in a position of grave responsibility while also expected to enter into pre-arranged royal matrimony. 

Here, however, that solemn position is no less than Queen of England, and the callow young girl, Victoria (Romy again, of course, and just as captivating as ever) is beset on both sides by those who wish to use her to advance their own political goals.  In fact, the first half of the film is preoccupied with the turbulent political concerns that occur when Victoria unexpectedly becomes Queen and must shoulder burdens that a lesser person might find unbearable.

Finally, though, at about the halfway point, all of this changes abruptly and VICTORIA IN DOVER becomes just the kind of romantic fantasy that made the "Sissi" movies so irresistible.  It may be even more of a fairytale story, in fact, with Victoria stopping off at a humble roadside inn (in disguise as a commoner, of course) only to meet her intended husband, the German prince Albert (Adrian Hoven), who is also there posing as one of the little people. 

One thing leads to pretty much exactly what you think it will, although as usual this predictability is of the highly satisfying kind.  The romantic aspect is such that the film is positively Disneyesque at times--Victoria reminds me of Snow White, while the prince is definitely charming.  I almost expected them to start singing to each other during the "Romeo" scene on the balcony of Vickie's rustic hotel room. 

VICTORIA IN DOVER has everything we love about the "Sissi" series but with a different recipe.  It's still quite a sumptuous dish. 

BONUS FEATURES:

Disc five in THE SISSI COLLECTION contains two featurettes.  One is "Sissi's Great-Grandson at the Movies", an excerpt from the documentary "Elisabeth: Enigma of an Empress" which features the title descendant of the real-life Sissi comparing the historical figure to her cinematic counterpart. 

The other is "From Romy to Sissi", a lengthy black-and-white making-of documentary that's narrated in winsome fashion by Romy Schneider herself (who would die tragically at age 43) and is loaded with rare behind-the-scenes footage.

The disc also contains a fascinating novelty: the condensation of the "Sissi" trilogy into one film entitled FOREVER MY LOVE, which was then dubbed into English, given a theme song by Burt Bacharach, and released to American audiences by Paramount Pictures in 1962.  While somewhat rushed and disjointed (and unrestored), with less than ideal dubbing, this feature-length "greatest hits" package of the original trilogy is a novelty that I found keenly interesting.

Finally, the Blu-ray case contains a lavishly-illustated 20-page booklet with credits and a synopsis for each film, plus an essay by renowned film writer Farrah Smith Nehme.

In my opinion, THE SISSI COLLECTION is Blu-ray at its most dazzling and visually splendid.  A spectacular feast for the eyes, these highly enjoyable films deftly avoid melodrama, are never heavy-handed or maudlin, and never descend into soap opera.  As romantic comedy-drama, historical fiction, and pure cinematic pageantry, they're absolutely top-notch.

Type:  Blu-ray
Running Time: 600 mins. + extras
Rating:  NR
Genre:  Drama
Aspect Ratio: 1.78:1 Widescreen/4:3
Audio:  (BD) DTS-HD Master Audio/5.1 Dolby Digital / (Bonus DVD) 5.1 Dolby Digital/2.0 Stereo
Language: German with English Subtitles

THE SISSI COLLECTION -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

SHARKTOPUS -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 3/3/11

 

"Dumb" has a new name, and that name is SHARKTOPUS (2010).  This highly-rated SyFy Original Movie, produced by legendary filmmaker Roger Corman and his wife Julie, will either make you giddy with bad-movie excitement or leave you utterly stupified.  Maybe even both.

After the success of DINOSHARK, SyFy contacted Corman about doing this film as a follow-up.  As he relates in the commentary, he initially turned it down because, while "dinosharks" might conceivably have existed in prehistoric times, the idea of a half-shark, half-octopus just seemed a little too farfetched.  (Unlike, say, giant crab monsters.)  He eventually gave in, on the condition that the creature be a product of genetic engineering rather than a freak of nature. 

Thus, we have scientist Nathan Sands (Eric Roberts) and his daughter Nicole (Sara Malakul Lane), whom he affectionately refers to as "Pumpkin", creating the dreaded Sharktopus for the military.  Pumpkin naively hopes Sharktopus will be used for good, but her sneaky dad has designed it to be a ruthless killing machine, which it demonstrates when its electronic restraints are damaged during a test and it starts eating people all up and down the coast of scenic Puerto Vallarta.  With the Navy breathing down his back, Sands hires fun-loving aquatic mercenary Andy Flynn (Kerem Bursin) to reel the big fish in and bring it back alive.
 


With this set-up quickly established, the film now treats us to an endless series of Sharktopus attacks with lots of tourists getting snared by the creature's tentacles right there on the shore and dragged into its toothy maw.  Several of these kills begin with an establishing montage of festive beach images and ample footage of bikini-clad babes cavorting around like monster appetizers.  When Sharktopus suddenly appears, the various bit players must then hop around screaming as the SPFX guys wrap bad-CGI tentacles around them and make with the spewing digital blood. 

The big, cartoony shark head which pops out of the water to chow down on them is highly effective--at generating laughs.  Seeing the entire mismatched monstrosity perched on a guardrail or the roof of a bamboo hut in all its writhing, snarling glory, treating the fleeing humans like a sushi buffet, is a sight you won't soon forget.  Special mention goes to the bunjee-jumping scene, which Corman tells us got the biggest response from audiences and is one of the movie's few genuinely effective moments.  (Roger and Julie's daughter guest-stars as the bouncing bait.)



With few exceptions, the performances range from awful to not-really-trying.  Mostly the actors just seem anxious to knock off their scenes and get back to partying in Puerta Vallarta.  Blake Lindsey isn't bad as Pez, a fisherman who leads TV newswoman Stacy Everheart (Liv Boughn) and her dopey cameraman Bones (Héctor Jiménez, who played Lonnie Donaho in GENTLEMEN BRONCOS) to wherever Sharktopus is likely to appear next.  As a pirate radio DJ, Ralph Garman of "The Joe Schmo Show" seems to be having fun.  Bursin and Lane make a dull main couple as Flynn and Pumpkin and could probably use a few more acting lessons. 

As for Eric Roberts, he's one of my favorite actors and I'd watch him in anything, which is fitting since these days it looks like he'll show up in anything.   Going from THE DARK KNIGHT to this must've been like falling out of a yacht into a swamp.  (Look for Roger Corman himself in a cameo as a beach bum.)



On a technical level, SHARKTOPUS is slapdash at best.  Things like camerawork, editing, and scene transitions are a dizzying jumble of ineptitude, while the subpar direction makes it hard to believe Declan O'Brien is the same guy who did such a solid job with WRONG TURN 3: LEFT FOR DEAD. 

The script, which seems to have been written on a Big Chief tablet, obviously doesn't take itself very seriously, as when Flynn offers this warning to the patrons of an open-air restaurant by the beach: "Excuse me, everyone.  There's a killer shark-octopus hybrid headed this way.  Please leave the marina in a timely fashion."  The thing is, movies like this are funnier when they aren't trying to be, so the scenes that actually mean to shock or excite us invariably provoke the most giggles. 

The DVD from Anchor Bay is in 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen with Dolby Digital 5.1 sound and subtitles in English and Spanish.  Extras include a commentary with Roger and Julie Corman plus the film's trailer. 

Any movie containing Eric Roberts, bikini babes, extras doing the imaginary-tentacle-tango, the guy who played Lonnie Donaho in GENTLEMEN BRONCOS, and one of the dumbest monsters in film history can't be all bad.  And SHARKTOPUS doesn't let up for a minute--it keeps assaulting us with undiluted stupid during its entire running time.  That's a claim some of this year's Best Picture nominees can't even make.

SHARKTOPUS -- DVD Review by Porfle

DINOCROC VS. SUPERGATOR -- DVD Review by Porfle

 Originally posted on 6/25/11

 

Roger Corman strikes again with another mutant monster fest that's actually a cut above the rest.  The rest, that is, of these bizarro beast brawls that the venerable producer has been churning out for the SyFy Channel lately.  While DINOCROC VS. SUPERGATOR (2010) never strives to be more than the addlebrained B-picture that it is, it's still better than the likes of SHARKTOPUS.  And, for once, the CGI is pretty darn good.

In his final film appearance, David Carradine plays Jason Drake, a shady millionaire who commissions some scientists to develop techniques for growing oversized food, then orders them to apply the same science to living animals so he can sell the results to the military.  Two of the results, a dinocroc and a supergator, escape from the secluded lab and gobble up all the scientists they can eat before heading off to more populated areas.  This opening sequence is pretty cool and lets us know right away that the SPFX in this movie aren't going to be all that painful to look at.  In fact, they're rather impressive at times.

Not so impressive are the acting and dialogue, but in a movie called DINOCROC VS. SUPERGATOR I don't exactly expect to see Sir Lawrence Olivier doing "Hamlet."  Carradine, who does most of his scenes lounging in a chair by the pool, is there to grab a paycheck and soak up the Hawaiian scenery.  Rib Hillis is adequate as crossbow-slinging tough guy "The Cajun", whom Drake hires to kill the escaped monsters, and Amy Rasimas is suitably plucky and hot as Cassidy, who is some kind of game warden or something so she gets to wear a skimpy uniform.
 


Corey Landis plays the role of FBI investigator Paul Beaumont, assigned to collect evidence against Drake, with an enjoyably light touch.  (His hideous Hawaiian shirt is a nice running gag.) I especially liked Lisa Clapperton as Drake's bad-girl assistant Victoria, a heartless hitwoman who likes to kill people.  Former Penthouse Pet and softcore sex film star Delia Sheppard appears as a scientist who escapes the initial carnage and tries to warn the world of the impending lizard attack.

It's all very tongue-in-cheek, with director Jim Wynorski (as "Jay Andrews") giving it all a dynamic visual quality that includes some really nice camerawork and a fairly brisk pace despite some draggy spots.  Shot mostly on the Hawaiian island of Kauai, the scenery is often spectacular and there's no shortage of bikini girls running around serving themselves up as reptile treats.  Quite a few people get eaten, in fact, including some mercenaries sent in by Drake to kill the escaped animals and finish off the surviving scientists.  Two of them have a dialogue exchange I found amusing:

"Man, I don't think I could stomach shooting civilians like that."
"Don't think of it as civilians.  Think of it as dollar signs."
 


In most shots the creatures' movements are relatively fluid and natural, and they seem to have weight and substance.  A sequence with the supergator chasing a speeding jeep down a dirt road (a la JURASSIC PARK) features some outstanding CGI and is just one of many effects scenes that I found particularly well-done for a film of this kind.  The final battle between dinocroc and supergator is handled nicely as well, although this title altercation comes as a brief, one-sided letdown.

The DVD from Anchor Bay is in 1.78:1 anamorphic widescreen with Dolby Digital 5.1 sound.  Subtitles are in English and Spanish.  Extras include a laidback commentary track with Roger Corman and Jim Wynorsky, and the film's trailer.

Unlike some of the other films in this oddball sub-genre, DINOCROC VS. SUPERGATOR actually feels sort of like a real movie that you can enjoy without lowering your expectation level to rock-bottom.  Still, it never takes itself seriously enough to try and be anything more than what it is--a competently-made and fairly enjoyable junk film.    

DINOCROC VS. SUPERGATOR -- DVD Review by Porfle

Weird Transformation Scene In Fritz Lang's "Woman In The Moon" (1929) (video)

 

Video by Porfle Popnecker. I neither own nor claim any rights to this material. Just having some fun with it. Thanks for watching!

 

 

Weird Transformation Scene In Fritz Lang's "Woman In The Moon" (1929) (video)

FROZEN -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 9/20/10

 

"Predicament" movies are weird.  If they're done badly, they're boring, but if they're done well, they can be torture to endure.  So the only way to judge a movie about stranded people struggling to survive the elements, or trying not to get devoured by man-eating sharks or giant crocodiles, is by how unpleasant it is to watch.  FROZEN (2010) is unpleasant all right, though perhaps not quite the ultimate ordeal the filmmakers were aiming for.

The set-up is about as simple as it gets--three college kids go skiing for the weekend, get stuck on the ski-lift as the lodge closes for the week, and must either figure out a way to get down or slowly freeze to death.  Dan (Kevin Zegers, IT'S A BOY GIRL THING, Zack Snyder's DAWN OF THE DEAD) and Lynch (Shawn Ashmore, "Iceman" in the X-MEN movies) are childhood buddies who have grudgingly invited Dan's girlfriend Parker (newcomer Emma Bell), a novice skier, along on what is usually a "guy" outing. 

Like your typical teen movie, FROZEN begins with the three friends frolicking on the slopes to jaunty rock music and engaging in insubstantial dialogue back at the lodge, with the hint of romantic complications cropping up amongst them.  It's only when the ski-lift suddenly stops as they head up the mountain for one last late-night run that the harsh reality of the "predicament" flick hits our now totally helpless trio with a sickening thud.  While at first it seems like the set-up for an episode of "Seinfeld", they gradually realize that they're in big trouble and the viewer settles in for the ordeal to come.


 

To the movie's credit, the formerly lighthearted tone turns dark pretty quick as the hopeless situation goes shockingly wrong.  We've only had a brief time to get to know the characters, who aren't all that deep to begin with, but we've been made to care about them just enough to cringe during their increasingly desperate attempts to save themselves.  Meanwhile, they're buffeted by icy cold sleet and stricken with frostbite, and--wouldn't you know it--the bolts holding their ski-lift chair in place are coming loose.

With only three characters, you know something bad's going to happen to somebody sooner or later.  It proves to be sooner when one of them decides to jump, hoping the snow will break the fall.  It doesn't.  At that point, the film offers its equivalent to those man-eating sharks and giant crocodiles when a pack of ravenous wolves emerges from the forest.  This leaves only one remaining course of action--climbing up to the razor-sharp cable overhead and dangling hand-over-hand to the nearest support tower, where a ladder awaits.  Again, the suspense is painfully nerve-wracking.


 

Performances by the leads are as good as they need to be, with Emma Bell ably supplying most of the histrionics (especially when she starts worrying about what will happen to her dog if she dies).  Writer-director Adam Green (HATCHET, GRACE) wrings a good deal of tension from his simple premise and uses the camera well, with most or all of the outdoor scenes shot on location to establish a realistic sense of windswept isolation.  The stuntwork is coordinated by Jason Voorhees himself, Kane Hodder, who plays a bit part in the film. 

The DVD from Anchor Bay is in 2.40:1 anamorphic widescreen with English Dolby Surround 5.1 and Spanish Mono.  Subtitles are in English and Spanish.  Extras include a commentary track with director Green and the three lead actors, plus four "making of" featurettes, altered and deleted scenes, a trailer, and an Easter egg. 

Not quite as gruelingly suspenseful as BLACK WATER or some other films of its ilk, FROZEN is still one of the most nail-biting flicks I've seen in recent years.  I doubt if it will have much rewatch value for me, but it's just the thing to get the old adrenaline going. 

FROZEN -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

 

 

 

Originally posted on 6/18/22

 

The Film Detective does it again with a nicely-restored special edition of the 1957 fan favorite THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS, which looks way better now than most of us have ever had a chance to see it.

Of course, the scratchy old prints on my local station's afternoon movie show sufficed for me as a kid back in the 60s. While very low-budget and admittedly hokey at times, the film gave me chills back then and still delivers on sheer entertainment value for those of us who grew up on these lurid sci-fi/monster thrillers.

BRAIN boasts a solid cast, with genre stalwart John Agar as scientist Steve March, who stumbles upon strange radioactive signals coming from deep within a desert mountain. Robert Fuller plays Steve's assistant Dan, years before he would become a TV icon in such shows as "Laramie", "Wagon Train", and "Emergency." 

 

Joyce Meadows vividly plays Steve bride-to-be Sally, who grows concerned when Steve returns from the cave without Dan and displaying strange, frightening new personality traits (including a wildly increased libido). This is because he's been taken over by Gor, an evil alien entity bent on conquering the world.

While Gor's appearance has evoked laughter from many viewers over the years--he's basically a giant floating brain with eyes--I've always had a fondness for both him and his counterpart, a benign floating brain named Vol whose mission is to capture the criminal fugitive.

Whenever Steve's body is ruled by Gor, it gives John Agar a chance to display maniacal, homicidal villainy as never before, which he seems to enjoy despite the pain caused by a pair of silver-painted contact lenses designed to make his eyes glow.

It was this indelible vision, and not the floating brains, that gave me such shivers as a kid as Steve/Gor gleefully blew up passenger planes and fried hapless victims with that sinister glare.

The film is skillfully and econically directed by Nathan Juran (aka Nathan Hertz), whose eclectic career also included such diverse titles as THE SEVENTH VOYAGE OF SINBAD and ATTACK OF THE 50-FOOT WOMAN. Camerawork and lighting are particulary good, as is a rousing musical score by Walter Greene.

The disc from The Film Detective offers some nice featurettes (listed below) including a recently-shot tour of the film's outdoor locations with star Joyce Meadows, who also appears along with other guests in the commentary track by leading film historian Tom Weaver. Weaver also penned the illustrated booklet on the career of producer Jacques Marquette. Viewers of the film can choose between full-screen and matted widescreen.

Good production values, amusing dialogue, and a few actual chills are some of the reasons why THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS should appeal to fans of low-budget 1950s sci-fi thrillers. For a film which, on first glance, looks like just another of those "so bad it's good" flicks, it's actually not bad at all.



THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS

Retail Price: $29.95
Release Date: 6-21-2022
Runtime: 71 min.
Genre: Sci-Fi, Fantasy
Language: English
Closed Captions: English, Spanish
Color/BW: BW

SPECIAL FEATURES -

    Full Color Booklet with original essay by Author/ Historian Tom Weaver
    Full commentary track by historians Tom Weaver, David Schecter, Larry Blamire, and PLANET AROUS star, Joyce Meadows
    The Man Before the Brain: Director Nathan Juran - an original Ballyhoo Motion Pictures production
    The Man Behind the Brain: The World of Nathan Juran - an original Ballyhoo Motion Pictures production
    The film will also be included in a full frame format, 1.33:1
    Now including a special, all new, introduction by Actor Joyce Meadows!

THE BRAIN FROM PLANET AROUS -- Blu-ray Review by Porfle

VENGEANCE TRILOGY (SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE/ OLDBOY/ LADY VENGEANCE) -- DVD Review by Porfle

 

Originally posted on 3/21/10

 

As one who was eager to discover Korean director Park Chan-wook and his famed "Vengeance" trilogy, I found Palisade Tartan Asia Extreme's eight-disc VENGEANCE TRILOGY--containing SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE, OLDBOY, and LADY VENGEANCE, and brimming with extras--to be a veritable treasure trove of fun. Not that the subject matter is fun, mind you, since this is hardly the kind of revenge flick where Charles Bronson blows away bad guys as we cheer through our popcorn. For these unfortunate characters, vengeance ain't necessarily good for what ails 'em.


SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE (2002) begins the trilogy with the old story of a "simple plan" that inevitably goes all to hell. Ha-kyun Shin plays Ryu, a green-haired deaf-mute who toils in a factory while desperately waiting for a donor kidney for his dying sister (Ji-Eun Lim). His attempt to purchase the necessary organ on the black market ends disastrously, as he loses not only all his money but one of his own kidneys as well. Then he gets laid off from his job just as the doctor informs him that a donor kidney, which he can no longer afford, is finally available.

Ryu's domineering girlfriend Yeong-mi (Du-na Bae), a radical political activist with terrorist ties, concocts a scheme to abduct the young daughter of wealthy businessman Park Dong-jin (Kang-ho Song) and hold her for ransom, with the naive confidence that it will be a benevolent kidnapping and result in happy endings for all involved. Her prediction goes horribly wrong, as does the kidnapping, and she and Ryu find themselves the targets of a vengeful father whose emotional devastation demands a payment in blood. Ryu, meanwhile, attempts to track down the illicit organ merchants and extract some lethal payback of his own. Both find the price of revenge distressingly high.


"I wanted to make something that felt too real," director Park Chan-wook explains in one of the bonus disc's interviews. "I wanted the audience to be tired when they finished the film." As opposed to the later OLDBOY'S flamboyant surrealism and absurdity, the bad things that happen during this film are disturbingly matter of fact, with no suspenseful music or editing, often occurring in the background of a shot. We're allowed to search the frame for information ourselves rather than have everything pointed out to us, which can be strangely unsettling.

"As a director, I think this unkind way of presenting the story makes the viewer a more active participant in the film," says Park. Lengthy wide-angle shots often place the characters far from the camera, punctuated by unexpected images from odd angles which tease us with brief snippets of information. One of the most important death scenes in the film occurs almost peripherally within the frame as the static camera lingers over a placid rural setting. Without the usual editing and camera angles leading the viewer through the scene, we're left to watch helplessly as the tragedy unfolds with dreadful inevitability.


Still, Park occasionally gets up close and personal, as in a brutal torture-by-electricity scene or a shocking knife murder of a man by a group of terrorists. Here, in a subtle bit of absurdity that's almost funny, the camera impassively observes the dying man as he strains to read the death warrant pinned to his own chest by a knife. Even in a sequence which in any other film might play out as a brisk action setpiece, such as Ryu's bloody final encounter with the organ merchants, Park tweaks our expectations by approaching the familiar scenario with a fresh and pleasingly odd perspective.

Disc one contains the film plus a commentary track with director Park and actor-filmmaker Ryoo Seong-wan. Disc two features lengthy interviews with the film's director and stars, behind-the-scenes featurettes, storyboards, trailer, and Johnathan Ross's 17-minute profile of Park for the BBC.

"When you set out for revenge, first dig two graves," someone told James Bond way back in 1981's FOR YOUR EYES ONLY. With SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE, Park Chan-wook takes that hoary old proverb and dramatizes it in dispiritingly downbeat and often heartrending new ways, focusing in almost clinical fashion on tragic details that linger in the mind. Perhaps the most disturbing thing about this chain reaction of consequences is that there are two sides headed for a deadly collision, and our sympathies extend to both of them. This is a theme that will carry over into the next film in the series.


OLDBOY (2003) is very different from SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE and might be seen as a stylistic evolution for Park. Where SYMPATHY was more lean and straightforward, OLDBOY is an explosion of cinematic expression that almost overwhelms the viewer with its aggressive intensity. SYMPATHY invites us to sit back and gaze attentively at characters gradually sliding into inevitable ruin; OLDBOY straps us in and takes us on a wildly disorienting bumper-car ride.


Min-sik Choi gives a brilliant, intense performance as Dae-su Oh, a workaday family man who, after drunkenly celebrating his young daughter's birthday, suddenly wakes up in a motel room-like prison cell where he will spend the next fifteen years. During that time, his wife is murdered and the crime scene is doctored to make him the suspect, while his daughter is placed in foster care. He learns of this on television, which is his only link to the outside world.

After his release back into a world that is now strange to him, Dae-su is understandably obsessed with finding out who imprisoned him and why. Thus begins a mysterious and violent odyssey that eventually takes him back to a single indiscretion in his youth which ignited a chain reaction of tragedy for the person now devoted to punishing him. Dae-su is aided in his quest by a sympathetic young sushi chef named Mido (the very cute Hye-jeong Kang), who becomes his lover and offers much-needed moral support and solace. As he gradually gets closer to the shocking truth, he finds that prison was only the beginning of a diabolical web of torment devised for him by his unknown nemesis.


In some ways, the incarceration has a beneficial effect on Dae-su Oh. Over the long years he builds his physique, becomes a fierce boxer by banging his fists against a figure he's drawn on the wall, hones his instincts and willpower, and develops the patience and determination of a caged animal. He also divests himself of the frivolity and childishness his character displays when we first meet him, becoming a ruthless force to be reckoned with.

His repressed rage later allows him to take on well over a dozen oppenents in a cramped hallway during what I feel is the film's most astounding sequence. Most of this furious fight is done in one incredible take with the camera slowly dollying along with the actors as they perform a dazzling series of choreographed fight moves with bone-crushing realism. (This surely ranks among the greatest long takes ever filmed.) Wielding a claw hammer and with a knife protruding from his back, Dae-su becomes one of the most thrilling action heroes in recent memory in a balls-out brawl that eschews fancy moves or wirework of any kind.

Violence punctuates the film at several points--a man is stabbed to death with a broken DVD, another has his teeth yanked out one by one, people are driven to suicide--culminating in an extended sequence within the mystery man's spacious penthouse suite which becomes an escalating ordeal of physical and emotional devastation. Each shot is carefully devised by Park for maximum effect as Min-sik Choi's performance reaches a peak that is stunning.


A wealth of special features begins on disc one with three separate commentary tracks subtitled in English, each with the director and various crewmembers. Disc two features cast and crew interviews in which they discuss the conception of the film and its characters beyond the usual sound bites doled out to the press. There's a brief phone interview in which the author of the original story, Tsuchiya Garon, offers his favorable impressions of the film while we get to see several pages from the graphic novel. The film's production design, music, and special effects are explored, along with deleted scenes. Of additional interest are a look at the film's success at Cannes and a thoughtful Q & A between director Park and a small gathering of fans.

In addition to some Palisades Tartan trailers, disc three boasts a three-and-a-half hour documentary entitled "The Autobiography of Old Boy Video Diary." An exhaustive record of the making of the film, it documents the shooting of virtually every scene in great detail, without narration, demonstrating not only the meticulousness of the director but also how grueling the shoot was for the actors. This is especially true for star Min-sik Choi, who did many of his own stunts and got banged up quite a bit. Good spirits generally prevail (although the difficult New Zealand shoot frayed some nerves) and the details of how some of the most memorable scenes were accomplished make for absorbing viewing.

Dense, complex storytelling that is anything but light viewing, OLDBOY demands viewer involvement on a much higher level than the usual revenge flick. Like SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE, the complicated story presents two identifiable points of view in a conflict that goes beyond the usual heroes and villains and refuses to offer easy or clear-cut resolutions. Park Chan-wook's command over the language of film enables him to express all of this visually to a degree that's endlessly impressive. "They say you can't catch two rabbits at once," he reflects on his accomplishment. "I feel like we caught two rabbits, a deer, an otter, a badger, and many other animals."



I first thought LADY VENGEANCE, aka Sympathy for Lady Vengeance (2005), was going to be another hot-action-babe flick along the lines of MS. 45. So it came as a pleasant surprise to find that it's the most thoughtful, richly artistic and deeply introspective film in the trilogy. It's also the one in which Park Chan-wook seems to express his most heartfelt, poetic, and yes, sympathetic thoughts on the subject.

The story begins with Geum-ja Lee (Yeong-ae Lee) being released from prison after serving 13 years for the kidnap and murder of a little boy, Won-mo. Former cellmates with whom she reunites on the outside are shocked to find that the cheerful and loving "angel" they knew before now appears to be cold and emotionless. In reality, she's been gaining their allegiance in order to use them to help carry out a plan of revenge against Won-mo's actual killer, Mr. Baek (OLDBOY star Min-sik Choi), a serial child murderer who threatened to kill Geum-ja's infant daughter if she didn't confess to the crime. The fact that she aided in Won-mo's abduction (naively thinking it to be the same sort of "good" kidnapping as described in SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE) makes her desire for atonement and redemption all-consuming.


Geum-ja tracks down her now 14-year-old daughter Jenny (Yea-young Kwon), who thinks that her mother "dumped" her, and desperately tries to reconcile with her. In the meantime, she has found Mr. Baek, still working as a school teacher and preying on children. She summons the families of several murdered children to an abandoned school, shows them Baek's own videotapes of his gruesome deeds, and reveals to them that he is bound and gagged in the next room. Geum-ja then gives them all a choice--turn him over to the legal system, or deal with him themselves.

Flashbacks of the beatific image Geum-ja projected while in prison are starkly contrasted with her later zombie-like state, which reflects a deep self-loathing. These jarring impressions are often depicted with abrupt editing and off-kilter camera angles. Only when she reunites with Jenny does she allow her feelings to overwhelm her again, and as the story becomes more emotional Park Chan-wook's direction settles into a more stately and elegant style while remaining fluid and inventive. This is especially true of the protracted revenge sequence in the abandoned school, as Park lingers on the inner conflict and seething rage of the family members. As the film winds down to a wistful and almost dreamlike denouement, with Geum-ja grasping for a last fleeting chance at redemption, we're left with haunting, delicately-wrought images of serene beauty and sadness.


There are several fascinating closeups of the remarkable Yeong-ae Lee as she runs the gamut of emotions with impressive depth. One that's particularly striking comes near the end, when her face twists into a masklike rictus of mindless, sadistic glee. Hardly the typical action heroine, her anger is expressed in messy, kinetic bursts. There is one thrilling sequence, however, in which she fights off two attackers hired by Mr. Baek (Ha-kyun Shin and Kang-ho Song of SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE) in a snowy alleyway at night, and for a brief moment is given full cinematic awesomeness by Park Chan-wook.

Disc one features two commentary tracks in which Park is joined by actress Yeong-ae Lee and his art director, and a third with film critic Richard Pena. Disc two is virtually identical to disc one, except that it contains what is described as the "Fade to White" version of the film. Here, after a brief introduction by the director, we see his original intent to slowly drain the color from the film during its running time until finally the last twenty minutes or so would be completely black-and-white. Park himself had trouble deciding whether or not to go with the idea, which he'd been considering as far back as the first film in the trilogy, so it's not exactly what I'd consider his "original vision" of the film. But it's an interesting "what-if."

Disc three begins with a "making of" featurette and an electronic press kit with various goodies. These are followed by technical featurettes, director and cast interviews, deleted scenes, a look at the film's successful showing at the Venice Film Festival, trailers and TV spots, and a poster gallery. "Get Together" shows how many of the actors from the first two "Vengeance" films returned to appear in this one.

All three films are in anamorphic widescreen with Dolby 5.1 DTS and surround sound. Language is Korean with English and Spanish subtitles. In addition to the previously-mentioned extras, the set comes with a 32-page booklet of essays by Eli Roth, producer Don Murphy, stunt-coordinator John Kreng, Palisades Tartan's Rick Stelow, and filmmaker Susan Montford, and is richly illustrated with full-color photographs. All in all, this set turned me into a Park Chan-wook fan and continues to make me giddy with cinematic joy each time I rewatch these amazing films.


It's been said that LADY VENGEANCE lapses into the conventional by having a one-dimensional bad guy devoid of the usual shadings. I think it's good that Park ends the trilogy by finally giving us a bastard who clearly and richly deserves his punishment, which serves as an uneasy catharsis for the viewer as well as the story's participants. Still, their satisfaction is short-lived and brings not happiness, but merely another level of spiritual uncertainty that they must continue to deal with. If Park hadn't touched on this aspect of revenge and explored its consequences, the trilogy begun by SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE and OLDBOY would have been incomplete.

VENGEANCE TRILOGY (SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE/ OLDBOY/ LADY VENGEANCE) -- DVD Review by Porfle

THE CREATURE WALKS AMONG US -- Movie Review by Porfle

(NOTE: Originally posted at Bumscorner.com.  CONTAINS SPOILERS.)

 

 Last posted on 10/3/09

 

With the passing of Frankenstein, Dracula, the Wolf Man, and the Mummy from neighborhood theater screens in the late forties, it seemed the era of the classic gothic monster movie was over. England's Hammer Films would eventually revive each of these monsters in one form or another, in brilliant color and with a shocking (for the 50s) amount of blood, violence, and sex, but before they did, Universal Studios (now Universal-International) still had one great classic monster character up their sleeves.

THE CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON (1954) introduced eager audiences to the "Gill Man", a human-fish hybrid that had somehow been left behind by evolution, who was forced to contend with a group of scientists invading his home in an isolated tributary of the Amazon river. After apparently being shot to death, the Gill Man sank lifelessly down into the dark depths, only to return a year later in REVENGE OF THE CREATURE. 

 

This time, he was captured and taken to a marine park in Florida, where more scientists tried unsuccessfully to domesticate him. But the Gill Man had no intention of joining "Flippy" the dolphin as a performing tourist attraction, so he escaped and wrought havoc along the Florida coastline until being tracked down and riddled with bullets yet again. A reprise of the previous film's ending, with the Creature drifting slowly toward the bottom of the ocean, brought another temporary end to his ongoing saga.

Finally, in 1956, U-I decided to resurrect the highly popular character for one last adventure, THE CREATURE WALKS AMONG US. It begins much like the first one, with yet another group of scientists setting out to track down the Creature, now residing in the Florida Everglades (this time, however, they're better organized, much better funded and equipped, and, as JAWS' Chief Brody would no doubt have advised, have a "bigger boat"). The leader of the expedition, wealthy and brilliant yet somehow not-all-there Dr. William Barton (a delightfully googly-eyed Jeff Morrow), is all a-titter about capturing the Gill Man and turning him into an air-breather (for reasons not all that logically explained), but is equally concerned that his young trophy wife Marcia (the lovely Leigh Snowden) has begun to slip from his rigid grasp and seek romantic fulfillment elsewhere. 

 

Handsome young Dr. Thomas Morgan (Rex Reason) is along to aid in the quest to capture the Creature, and also to share the focus of Dr. Barton's irrational jealousy along with Jed Grant (Gregg Palmer), a sex-obsessed wolf hired to help with the more dangerous aspects of the expedition but who is more interested in helping Mrs. Barton get horizontal.

The first half of the story is pretty slow going unless these various character interactions pique your interest (as they do mine). One early foray into the deep by Morgan, Grant, and Mrs. Barton does feature some nice Creature footage from the previous movies as he stalks and observes them from afar, but it isn't until about midway through the film that the first really good action takes place when the men set out in a motorboat with a sonar-tracking device and are attacked. 

 

First, the Creature smashes their floodlight, leaving them in the dark until they frantically light a couple of gasoline lamps. Then he leaps onto the boat and picks up the gasoline can in order to hurl it at them, accidentally dousing himself with the flammable liquid. Grant hits him with one of the lamps and the Creature goes up like a flaming torch. He retreats back into the water, but soon passes out from his third-degree burns and is captured.

 

Back on the boat, the Creature is bandaged and treated for his injuries by Barton and Morgan, who discover that not only does he have a more human-like secondary layer of skin underneath the scales, but also sports lungs capable of breathing air after a little surgical assistance -- fitting perfectly with Barton's goal of turning him into a land-dweller. When the bandages come off, the Creature's new look is revealed -- most of his fins and other identifying characteristics are gone, and his eyes have mutated to a more human appearance. But he's still a hulking, frightening monster. 

 

He escapes from the infirmary aboard the boat, interrupts a tender love scene between Grant and a less-than-willing Mrs. Barton, and plunges back into the water. No longer possessing gills, however, he begins to drown until Morgan dives in with an air hose and rescues him. At this point the Creature seems to realize that resistance is futile and becomes more docile.

Back on the mainland, the Creature (now crudely-garbed in a baggy outfit made of sailcloth) is transported by truck to a house in Southern California where he is enclosed within an electrically-charged fence. It is here that he begins to observe the volatile interactions between the supposedly more civilized humans -- Dr. Barton incessantly berating Marcia for being a "tramp", Grant horndogging after Marcia, etc. 

 

At last, Dr. Barton's jealousy gets the best of him and he murders one of the other men as the Creature watches, then drags the body into the cage to divert blame from himself. That does it -- Dr. Barton's uncouth behavior has finally gotten on the Creature's last good nerve, and he angrily rips the door off the cage and goes on a frenzied rampage through the house.

THE CREATURE WALKS AMONG US is considered by many monster fans to be the least of the three "Creature" films -- which, in fact, it probably is -- but I find it to be a worthy conclusion to the series. Not only is the conflict between the human characters interesting, but I think the idea of having the Gill Man transformed into an air-breather and placed among humans is a good one, and gives this third entry in the series a unique quality that was necessary for maintaining interest in a continuing saga that had already covered just about all the other possible story developments.

Technically, the film is just as well made as the first two, and the cast is fine, especially Jeff Morrow as the flaky Dr. Barton. Ricou Browning is once again on hand to ably portray the Creature in the underwater scenes, while the land-dwelling incarnation is handled this time by bulky character actor Don Megowan. Megowan manages to be quite expressive underneath the monster suit, using his eyes and body movements to convey the Creature's emotions ranging from anger to sadness. His final rampage through the house is the film's highlight, bringing to a fitting close not only this series but the entire Universal "classic monsters" era as a whole.

 

But it is at the very end of the film, when the Creature at last makes his way back to the water that is his home, that we best see him as the tragic figure he was always destined to be -- accosted by outsiders, taken forcibly from his natural environment, violated by cold science, and, finally, unable to return to the very water that had always sustained him.

THE CREATURE WALKS AMONG US -- Movie Review by Porfle

VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS -- Movie Review by Porfle

 
(NOTE: This is one of my earliest movie reviews and originally appeared at Bumscorner.com in 2005.)

 

In the annals of goofy teen movies, one stands taller than all the rest. Mainly because it has giant teenagers in it.

VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS is one of the dumbest movies ever made, yet it's a heck of a lot more fun to watch than THE BRIDGES OF MADISON COUNTY. Flung onto movie screens by Avco-Embassy Pictures way back in 1965, VILLAGE boasts an incredible cast including Tommy Kirk, Ron Howard, Johnny Crawford, Beau Bridges, Toni Basil, Joy Harmon, Tim "Mickey's my dad!" Rooney, Tisha Sterling, Joe Turkel, and the Beau Brummels. 

 

It was directed by Bert I. Gordon, the guy who liked to put giant things in his movies (notice hisinitials) such as AMAZING COLOSSAL MAN, EARTH VS. THE SPIDER, and FOOD OF THE GODS. Aside from the giant teenagers, this one has giant ducks, a giant tarantula, a giant cat, and a giant dog. The special effects aren't all that great, but, well, the movie didn't have a giant budget.

The story begins with a car wreck on the outskirts of town during a really bad rainstorm. Eight wild, fun-loving teenagers in their mid-twenties pile out and start dancing around in the mud. Then they flop down in it and commence to mud-rasslin'. But these activities aren't enough to satisfy such a hyperactive bunch, so they decide to walk to Hainesville and see what's hoppin' down at the local dance club. First, however, they break into a closed theater and help themselves to the facilities, which apparently include a washer-dryer combo and a shower.

Meanwhile, manly teen-heartthrob Tommy Kirk is making out on the couch with his girlfriend Nancy when suddenly there's an explosion down in her basement (no double-entendre intended). Nancy's kid brother, "Genius" (an Opie-sized Ron Howard), has just blown up his laboratory, and in the process has accidentally invented a substance that can super-size animals, which he discovers after his dog eats some of it and suddenly bumps his head on the ceiling. 

 

They feed a bit of it to some ducks that just happen to be waddling around out in the backyard, and the ducks get really big, too. Then the ducks waddle on down to the club and start dancing with the kids, who seem to think it's really neat to dance with some giant ducks.

But the ducks mean something else to Beau Bridges, the leader of the bad teenagers from outta town -- money. If he could steal the substance (technical name: "goo") he and his pals could get rich quick. He enlists Tisha Sterling to seduce Tommy Kirk while he personally puts the moves on Nancy, buying her a Coke and letting her feel his muscles. But their incredible combined sex appeal fails to elicit any information about the goo, so they must bide their time.

The next day, Tommy and Nancy hold a big rock 'n' roll pool party where they serve roast duck, and plenty of it. While Freddie Cannon serenades the crowd by unsuccessfully attempting to lip-synch to his song "Little Bitty Corinne", one of the bad girls finally tricks Genius into spilling the beans about the goo. 

 

Before you know it, Beau and his wild bunch are back at the theater, dividing the stolen hunk of goo into eight pieces. Seems they've decided to eat it themselves, get big, and show all those mean old adults that have always pushed them around who's boss, along with goody-goody fellow teens such as Tommy and Nancy.

 

They eat the goo. Buttons start popping off. Clothing begins to rip. Joy Harmon comes to the forefront at this point in the movie for two really big reasons. No, not her acting and dialogue. In case you don't know, Joy played the girl who washes her car in COOL HAND LUKE, which is the first thing that most guys who have seen COOL HAND LUKE remember about it. She doesn't wash a car in this movie, but she does get to be about fifty feet tall and dance around in a makeshift bikini, which will do.

The pool party suddenly turns ugly when the giant teenagers show up and start jerking and frugging in slow motion to Jack Nitzsche's ultra-cool theme music. At one point, Joy playfully grabs normal-sized Johnny Crawford (who played Mark McCain on "The Rifleman") and hangs him from her halter straps. Maybe it's just me, but this doesn't seem like such a bad thing. Since his girlfriend is watching, however, Johnny must act mortified by the jiggling ordeal until finally the local sheriff (Joe Turkel of BLADE RUNNER fame) shows up, takes one look at the giant teens, and groans wearily, "Oh, for crying out loud, now what's THIS?"

Beau informs him that they are taking over the town. This means that the adults will have to take orders from them, which includes lugging tons of Kentucky Fried Chicken and Cokes to the theater every day around lunchtime. To ensure their cooperation, Beau has the sheriff's daughter and Tommy's girlfriend kidnapped and held hostage. Tommy and the rest of the good teens must then think of a way to rescue them while Genius works feverishly on a goo-antidote. 

 

Toni ("Oh Mickey, you're so fine") Basil, who plays a go-go dancer at the club, helps by distracting the big boys with some far-out booty-shakin'. Meanwhile, Johnny is lowered from the rafters by a rope so that he can shove a huge wad of ether-soaked cotton in Joy's face, and ends up lodged in her cleavage again. Did he help write this script or what?

All of this, of course, is leading up to the final David-and-Goliath showdown between Tommy and Beau involving spears and slingshots in the town square. "Don't worry...I'll bring you his head on a silver platter," Beau promises Joy right before the fight, to which one of the group confidently responds, for no apparent reason, "That was Samson and Delilah!" No, it wasn't, you big dummy, it was John the Baptist and Salome'. You just wanna grab Mr. Information and slap him a few times for being so dumb, but you can't, which is frustrating. But that was forty years ago, so he's probably been slapped plenty of times by now anyway.

If I told you any more, I'd be giving away too much of the plot -- not that it matters. VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS is stupid, has bad special-effects, and doesn't really make much sense, but it's also a lot of fun to watch. So for its entertainment value, and because Joe Bob Briggs himself once bestowed the "Joy Harmon Fan Club Appreciation Award" on me (although I'm not sure whether or not he's really authorized to do that), I'm giving it a giant thumbs up.

VILLAGE OF THE GIANTS -- Movie Review by Porfle