Christmas Evil (1980) : Deck the Halls with Despair

Christmas Evil--a.k.a. You Better Watch Out-- has gained a reputation as a rather obscure holiday horror film, and doesn't really fit into the typical killer Santa category. It's admittedly a bizarre film.  At its start, it's even a little slow and boring. But upon closer inspection, you can see the main character's decline into mental fragility coming into full view. The holidays are a precarious time for anyone who has had any trauma or loss in their life, and our sad Santa is suffering from a particular kind of PTSD.

On Christmas Eve, young Harry Stadling and his younger brother witness Santa Claus putting gifts under the Christmas tree.  Shortly thereafter, when Harry should be in bed, he hears murmuring and goes downstairs to take a look.  He sees Santa and his mother fondling each other and looking to take things to the next level.  Shocked, Harry rushes to the attic where, in the throes of hurtful dismay, he cuts himself on a snow globe he throws to the floor.

Thirty-some years later, Harry is weirdly and thoroughly obsessed with the man in the red suit.  He awakes each morning to a Christmas carousel alarm, plays carols all day, and has his entire apartment decorated for Christmas no matter what month it is.  He himself even dresses like Santa to sleep.  Though it's obvious he has some mental health issues, Harry manages to hold down a low level management position at the Jolly Dreams toy factory.  His co-workers make fun of him behind his back and trick him into working extra shifts on the assembly line making toys.  

Perhaps the most disturbing is Harry's habit of watching the neighborhood children to see who is "nice" and who is "naughty", taking it so far as to have two giant books in his apartment that he documents his findings, as in "Billy has impure thoughts" and "Susie is a little darling". While this is a disconcerting situation, it never quite gets to a creepy sexual level, thankfully. 

Harry comes to genuinely believe that he is the true Santa Claus - and he doesn't like how "bad" not only the kids but the adults, have become.  When one of his co-workers asks him to work a shift so he can be with his family, Harry agrees - only to discover Frank drinking and carrying on at the local pub.  

Harry's brother Phil invites him to Thanksgiving dinner with his family but Harry can't be bothered, and cancels last minute. He's still enraged about his co-worker lying.  He also gets upset when he finds out the owner of the Jolly Dreams factory is duplicitous in his idea of donating toys to kids - it turns out the staff has to work overtime and donate their own money.  

All of these things prey on Harry's mind until he pretty much snaps.  He dresses as Santa, steals toys from the factory, and paints his van like a sleigh. It's obvious that at this point, he truly believes he IS Santa Claus, and feels the need to exact revenge - while at the same time providing toys for the disadvantaged (and "good") children.  He takes off, starting with a local hospital, where he leaves bags of toys.  When he arrives at the local church right after Christmas Eve services, he is teased by a bunch of local yokels, and that's when he truly begins his reign of terror, killing the men and then quickly driving off, heading next to his co-worker Frank's house and then to the company Christmas party.

It's such a sad story, to be honest.  The depths of Harry's mental illness are not immediately recognizable, but come out in droves once he is pushed over the edge.  I think everyone can relate to having the holiday blues - or even getting completely overwhelmed and stressed out by all the expectations, but Harry's lapse of reality is next level. The worst part is that he has no one to help him.  His brother and co-workers surely all noticed that he was teetering on the edge of madness.  The trauma from his childhood caused the odd obsession with Santa, even pushing into believe he WAS Saint Nick himself.  

While some could see this film as not worthy of a watch because it does take its time to engage viewers, building poor Harry's tale of mental sickness slowly - which in turn makes it all the more believable.  The more angry he gets, the more delusional and reckless he becomes, culminating in his expected -- and quite frankly, pitiful-- downfall.  

The way society treats its "outcasts" is one of the reasons why the amount of mental illness that goes undetected and untreated is so high, particularly in America. It's a disgrace that more care is not taken.  We all should be watching for signs of depression, anxiety and other mental struggles in our families, friends, co-workers, neighbors.....anyone.  Sometimes people just need a friendly hello.  Sometimes they need intensive therapy.  It's not always easy to see, and it's not always easy to get involved, but it's something we all should be more aware of.  

I don't mean to be preachy, after all, this is just a horror movie.  But within the 90+ minute running time, there are plenty of examples of things to watch for - in the movie, and in real life.  And that gives "You Better Watch Out" a whole new meaning, doesn't it?

Festival Of Fear: Day 31: ~ Roots Of Hallowe'en

~by Marie Robinson

While I’m sure almost all of us will be celebrating Halloween today (hooray!), very few of you will still be honoring the Pagan holiday of Samhain (sah-win), which begins tonight at sundown. Celebrated in Celtic countries, Samhain marked the beginning of winter and many rituals and festivities took place over the night.

Although Samhain was a time to prepare for winter, it was also very much a festival of the dead, as the Irish believed that on this night the doorways to the Otherworld opened and spirits were allowed access into our realm.

It was believed that dead family members would return to their homes to warm themselves by their fireside so a fire was, of course, kept roaring, and a place at the table was sat for the ghost. The sídhe were also free to walk the Earth on Samhain; the sídhe are a race of supernatural beings that come in many forms, but are all essentially nature spirits, or, in other words, faeries, elves, goblins and that sort of thing.


The Irish have utmost fear and respect for the sídhe and would take great care to make sure they were comfortable on Samhain. They would place offerings of their doorsteps in the form of food and drink in hopes that the sídhe would help their crops to prosper next harvest. Trick ‘r’ treating comes directly from a symbolic ritual that the Celts would perform on Samhain.

People would dress up in costumes—that were, rather, disguises to hide their human selves from the sídhe—and go house to house singing Pagan songs or reciting poetry. The owner of the house was then expected to reward them with food (which was gathered for a enormous feast), and if they did not, bad luck was sure to come upon them.

The sídhe love to play tricks and fool people, so, naturally, if one is dressed up as one of the sídhe they may as well act like one, and because of all the prank playing Samhain eventually gained the nickname “Mischief Night”. In modern times Mischief Night is commonly celebrated the night before Halloween and teenagers are encouraged to go out and perform pranks such as TP'ing houses. In Canada it is called Devil’s Night.

While some spirits were welcomed to return, there were also many precautions taken to keep dark forces at bay; the most famous one now being jack-o-lanterns (also made out of turnips), which were hollowed out and lit to intimidate evil spirits and frighten them away. Huge bonfires were lit on the night of Samhain to keep spirits away, and smoke was thought to cleansing and protecting.

If one is walking down the road on Halloween night and hears someone walking up behind them, they must not turn around, for if they do they could look Death in the face, therefore quickening their own timeline to the grave.

Those born on Halloween are given the gift of second-sight, the ability to see ghosts and faeries. They are also granted protection from them.

On Samhain and Halloween there were many ways to tell the future, and many strange ways to go about doing it. Some of the more easy ways are going to a crossroads, and in the voice of the whispering wind you will hear tell of events in the upcoming year. If you visit a churchyard when the clock strikes midnight, you will hear a voice list out the name of locals who will die within twelve months.

The divination rituals dealt almost exclusively with death and marriage. In aspect to the latter, a girl who looks in the mirror while combing her hair and eating an apple may catch a glimpse of her future husband’s image in the mirror. There are a handful of traditions that involve apples, including the tradition that has now become bobbing for apples. A long time ago the children used to take the apple they plucked out of the bucket home with them to put under their pillow, in the hopes that in their sleep they would be visited by their future spouse.

While many of the core themes and traditions of Samhain still exist today, few may know the origins behind them. For me, knowing the roots of the legends makes them even more magical and makes me enjoy my favorite day of the year even more.

 Happy Halloween everyone, and thank you for joining us in another year's festival of fear!

Sunday Bloody Sunday: The Happy Easter Edition!

 To celebrate Easter, I've found some awesome shots of some fairly disconcerting  - and bloody! - rabbits.

Enjoy!

SILENT HILL REVELATION

EASTER BUNNY BLOODBATH

NIGHT OF THE LEPUS

MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL

FATAL ATTRACTION

WATERSHIP DOWN

BUNNYMAN 2

EASTER BUNNY BLOODBATH

                                           (But my favorite creepy bunny isn't bloody at all....)

DONNIE DARKO

                                                              Have a bloody wonderful holiday!!

All I Want For Christmas Is A Good Ghost Story: Part 1

~ by Marie Robinson

Happy Holidays, everyone! Christmas is drawing ever near… There are some people who just love Christmas. Perhaps the most famous literary Christmas-lover was the great Charles Dickens.

Not only did he adore the holiday, he was a huge influence on it. I’m not kidding, this guy shaped Victorian Christmas. Tell me of a person who has never seen, read, or heard of A Christmas Carol and I will personally slap them. It was first published on December 17th, 1843 and sold over 5,000 copies by Christmas Eve. Over fifty film, theatre and television adaptations have been made. It is no wonder that Dickens considered A Christmas Carol to be his greatest achievement.

Before A Christmas Carol, Christmas in the mid-Victorian era was all about the Christ. And the mass. Come on, let’s be honest, no one wants to sit in church all fucking day. Of course, people were thrilled when Dickens came along and brought some secular fun to the season. He believed Christmas was all about being with family, dancing, laughing, giving to charity, and of course, telling stories.

If you don’t believe me that Dickens influenced Christmas, listen to Professor Hubert Lamb’s argument on the matter. He says that Dickens birthed the popular notion of a “white Christmas”. He went so far to prove his point and documented that a white Christmas occurred for the first eight straight years of Dickens’ life. Our bibliophile climatic researcher says that white Christmases are actually uncommon, but we have come to cherish them because of Dickens’ classic.

After the release of A Christmas Carol, the quintessential Christmas ghost story, Dickens decided to write a handful of others. He penned what were titled, “The Christmas Books” which included the short stories The Chimes (1844), The Cricket on the Hearth (1845), The Battle of Life (1846), and The Haunted Man (1848). Some are these are more supernatural than others, and most are hardly terrifying but he was determined and inspired to keep up the tradition. A few other Christmas ghost stories Dickens wrote are The Haunted House, Christmas Ghosts, The Trail for Murder and The Signal-Man which was adapted for the 1970 BBC mini-series A Ghost Story for Christmas. In reference to these tales author Peter Straub calls them, “A lively mixture of comedy, pathos, and the supernatural.”

A prototype of sorts to A Christmas Carol is The Story of the Goblins who Stole a Sexton. Released in December of 1836 it tells of a man named Grub, who is near identical to Scrooge, and chooses to go mope around in the graveyard on Christmas Eve. There he meets a ghostly figure who tells him how much his life is gonna suck if he doesn’t cheer up. If you wanted to take a simple moral from these stories it would be “Christmas is awesome!” But we know that Dickens was trying to say a little more than that. We get the Scrooge archetype yet again in A Haunted Man, where a grouchy old man is forced by a frightful apparition to reexamine his life. Dickens used this plot device to encourage a reassessment by his characters and his audience. He believes that the Christmas season is not only for nostalgia but also for change.

“…for we are telling Winter Stories—Ghost Stories, or more shame for us—round the Christmas fire; and we have never stirred, except to draw a little nearer to it.” –Charles Dickens, Christmas Ghosts

Happy Holidays From Fascination With Fear!!

Hope you and yours are feeling the love this Christmas!

Real Life Horror: A Rant About Xmas Shopping

Why do I do this to myself every damn year? I wait till the last minute, because life inevitably gets in the way, and then I am stuck at the godforsaken mall on the Sunday before Christmas.

I'm a relatively sane person. Most of the time. BUT... the holiday season gives me an anxious feeling in my gut starting about, oh..say, November 1st. They start pushing it down our throats at about 12:01 am and it doesn't end till the after-Christmas sales the second week of January. Black Friday should just be renamed 'the day we do not speak of' as far as I am concerned.

Thus this post, if you'll forgive me, is a peek into the horror I truly feel at dealing with the unenviable task of heading out to the mall. This, my friends, is real life horror - at its most reprehensible.

So I had a few things I desperately needed to get in order to have a Merry Christmas (well, in order for those around me to have a happy holiday - my relief was one-stop shopping at the liquor store!) and I found myself making the trek to the mall this fine afternoon. I had two goals: finish the damn shopping and make it home before the Steeler game came on at 4.
What happened from the moment I got in the car until I finally made it home (in time for kick-off, natch) is chronicled below. Bear with me.

People who take the carts out of Sears Grand ought to have their heads knocked off by those mall guards on the Segways. I do believe it says NOT to take them out of the damn store. But invariably some idiot with a couple unruly kids comes barreling down the small aisle in the literature section at Borders, one kid in the seat with his feet kicking his mom's crotch, the other standing up in the buggy section, pulling books off the shelves like cereal boxes. Why me?

And on that same note - what is up with those Segways anyway, I mean - seriously? How efficient would they be at stopping crime? I'm thinking I could probably out run any one of these yay-hoos if I had just snatched a purse or stolen a hot pretzel. What are the chances that the dude on wheels would actually catch me without running down some lady with a baby or a granny looking to buy a pair of crocs at the kiosk? They have to be the stupidest thing I've ever witnessed at the mall - and that includes all those Indian women trying to lather hand cream on my wrist. Gah!


A guy in front of me at a traffic light reached into his backseat and pulled out a flask (!) and took a swig. Um, DUI here he comes! (But you know, I was secretly thinking how warm and comforting a little swill of Jim Beam might have been as I waited for all the jagoffs in front of me to learn their colors - green means go, ass-munch!)
But I can only assume I'll see Mr. Johnny Walker alongside the road on my way home...

I witnessed an elderly woman get lost in Macy's. As I stood in line, I felt sick to my stomach as I watched her mill around near the women's sportswear, anxiously looking for...someone? She looked as old as God, with a long purple coat made of faux fur (as if there is a purple four footed beast out there in the hills of western PA somewhere), whisps of gray hair peeking out from under her black and gold (Go Steelers?) knitted cap, and a purse as large as a carry-on suitcase over her shoulder. She was wrinkly and sad, and finally took a seat beside the service desk without saying a word. I almost said something to her, but she shut her eyes so I didn't bother. Yes Grandma, we're all exhausted.


For those of you with kids, I apologize in advance.
It's certainly no secret that kids, in general, make me crazy. So when shopping, it's all I can do to avoid the toy section of every/any store in the lower 48. I just cannot tolerate looking at children's do-dads, novelties, and trinkets.
But here's the thing - many stores have surprise toy sections. As in, you'll be walking amongst the pots and pans, just looking for a 12 inch copper-bottom skillet, and wham! All of the sudden you turn the corner and are staring a display of Barbie dolls in the face. Ahhh! What the heck? Kids make me cringe, and never more than some snot-nosed little tot swinging a Barbie around by the hair whilst Mommy digs through her purse looking for that 15% off coupon.

Parents are, for the most part, less than stellar and pretty much let their kids get away with murder these days. They allow them to race through the aisles, open up the juice box or cereal they haven't even paid for, throw cheerios all over the floor, scream like wild banshees, and basically make everyone else - including myself - miserable. My mom would have given me shaken-kid syndrome if I'd have acted like that. Then she would have told me to wait till my father got home. Yikes.
Anyway, there were so many unruly children and so many tales to tell about this excursion that I don't have all day so I'll have to refrain altogether. Suffice it to say the little humans at the mall are my least favorite.
And don't even get me started about the line to meet and greet Santa Claus. That is an area to avoid at all costs.

Okay, so I know it's a cellular world and all that crap, but I did a little experiment when I went into the mall. I told myself I would try to find ten people who weren't either talking on, texting, or at least holding onto their cell phones for dear life and see how long it took me. Folks, I entered the mall at Borders and made it the whole way through the ridiculously busy crowds to the food court (a lengthy jaunt, probably a half mile at least) before I counted ten people NOT attached to their phone. This included the beast of a woman in front of me at the Hallmark store. (I did not, however, count mall employees - who if they could, I'm sure would have been on their cells chatting about how bawdy and uncontrollable the consumers were.) This woman had like, six Hallmark ornaments filling her arms as she still struggled to text someone. The line was like a football field long as it was (I'm exaggerating for effect) and she couldn't be bothered to move up in the line as it crawled forward. This irritated me so much that I almost threw down my cards and left. But I do have some heart left in my chest cavity and didn't want my elderly grandmother not to get her holiday greeting. I digress. Cell phones are everywhere. Which you already knew, as did I. But that's not what bothers me... it's how damn rude everyone is using them.

Traffic is utterly unbearable during the holidays, and today was no different. I am relatively lucky - it is a straight shot down a major highway to Pittsburgh Mills. Granted it is a boring 35 miles (!) but at least you can go 65mph. This is part of the problem though. I'm sure I'm not alone when I say I get a little nervous sometimes at people's driving habits. Not to mention the ghastly cell phone use we are all aware of, but what almost bothers me more is the tendency that some drivers have to ride up close to your bumper then back off. Like, I'm already going 75 mph (whoops!) - do you really NEED to go faster? Today I had a dude in a white Durango following me like a scene from Joy Ride or Jeepers Creepers. He kept showing up in my rear view mirror, taunting me into driving faster then backing off. He nearly had me convinced that he had me mistaken for some mob hit he was assigned to. Apparently upset that I continued to go faster than him and he couldn't get around me lest he drive twenty miles over the speed limit, he kept accelerating so much that I eventually caved and let my Jeep drop to 50 mph just so the bastard would pass me. Later when I turned off to the mall, I passed his car pulling into Smokey Bones (a rib joint). Guess he just couldn't wait to have that BBQ sauce. Prick. If it had been dark I'd have been totally wigged out.

Speaking of food, I had every intention of grabbing some delicious broccoli-cheese soup at Panera Bread when I set out. It never happened. I couldn't even bring myself to stop for a soft pretzel, I was so anxious to get out of there. It took everything I had just to get back to my car. I spoke with my husband and my friend Kristy (who talked me down from the ledge I'd climbed onto, so thanks for that, K) and drove away. Not before sitting in my car an extra three minutes just to piss off the lady in the Beemer behind me waiting impatiently for my parking space. Hey, I had to get a dig in somewhere!

I ended up scarfing down a steak taco at Taco Bell once I got closer to home and had calmed down. Best damn taco ever, I'm telling you.
But if that's not scary, I don't know what is.

Christmas Bloody Christmas

Happy Holidays, gore hounds!


Treevenge



Don't Open Till Christmas



Tales from the Crypt: And All Through The House



Silent Night Deadly Night 2



Jack Frost



Jack Frost 2: Revenge of the Killer Mutant Snowman



Silent Night Bloody Night



To All A Goodnight



Silent Night Zombie Night



Don't Open Till Christmas



Silent Night Bloody Night



Black Christmas (1974)



Black Christmas (2006)

In praise of Christmas villains...

When I was a kid, part of the happiness I found during the holiday season was watching all those old Christmas specials on tv. You know the ones I mean, because they are timeless and still playing in re-runs every year. But let's take a moment to give a shout-out to the villains of all those great shows. 'Cause after all, no joy is worth it unless you've had to deal with the Heat Miser and other likely suspects.

*Probably my favorite holiday bad-guy is Winter, the nasty warlock from Santa Claus is Coming to Town (1970).

No doubt the scariest wiz since Gandalf, Winter took great pleasure in protecting his lands like Casey Hampton probably does his twinkies.

Winter didn't like anyone trespassing, and took great measures to direct his magic trees to capture Kris Kringle while he was on his way to Sombertown to deliver toys to the kids.
Things looked fairly grim until Kris gives Winter a choo-choo.
This kind gift breaks down Winter's icy demeanor and before you know it, they are dancing and singing.

The true villain of Santa Claus is Coming to Town is probably more likely the mayor of Sombertown, the Burgermeister-Meisterburger - a grouchy bastard who friggin' hates kids, apparently - and doesn't want them having toys at all since his dumb ass tripped over a toy in the street.

So he bans toys and seeks to stop Kris altogether from delivering them secretly. What a prick.

This man seems almost irredeemable, and I hate him even after the town realizes how ridiculous his laws are and oust him, allowing Kris to morph into Santa Claus and continue his toy deliveries, albeit only once a year now.

*My second favorite villain is a two-fer.

In the hilarious Year without a Santa Claus(1974), we get the amusing and lively Snow Miser, as well as the gruff and boorish Heat Miser.

When Santa Claus is advised to take a rest, (Duh! he works once a year, people! I wish I had his job) Santa has become disillusioned with Christmas, believing most folks no longer believe in him and wouldn't miss him, so he decides to take off a year.
Naturally, this does not sit well, particularly with a couple of elves apparently worried about job security.
They take off to find some true believers and get lost in Southtown, where their reindeer (disguised as a dog so as not to draw attention - WTF?) gets taken to the pound.

When explaining that they are elves and the dog a reindeer, the Mayor balks at them and says he'll only release the deer if they can use their 'elfy magic' and make it snow in their town.

This takes the elves to Snow Miser for a plea for the white stuff. But Snow Miser doesn't own that territory so they have to make a deal with the Heat Miser. Trouble ensues. As does one of the catchiest tunes from any special out there.

Actually though, once again I think the true scares in this one don't come from the Miser duo, but from their madre, Mother Nature herself. I've no doubt she could kick the shit out of both of her sons, and anyone else that got in her way.

When I was small, her loud bellowing voice scared the shit out of me. I just wanted her to go away!

She was like Julia Child on steroids!

*Truly my favorite holiday special was no doubt Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (1964). When I was small I tape recorded it (back in the days of cassette recorders!) and listened to it over and over throughout the season - not even any VCR's back then, kiddies!. I loved it.

But I doubt I was ever scared of The Abominable Snowman, or Bumble as he was affectionately called.

While he frightened Rudolph and the gang quite rightly, I always wondered why Donner was so afraid - he seemed like such a bully, always bitching at Rudolph about his nose. If he was such a tough guy why didn't he make a stand? Instead, little misfit Hermie had to do it. Score!

I almost felt bad for the Bumble when they tore out all his damn teeth. But then again, if he'd have eaten Rudolph it wouldn't have ended quite the same. Venison, anyone?

But if I'm being honest here, Yukon Cornelius was ten times as frightening as the snowmonster.

Holy crap that dude was loud! He needed to put a lid on it. I was actually excited when he went over the cliff. Alas, he returned in the end. This was a kid's show, after all.

But seriously, he and Mother Nature should get together.
STFU!

*Next up, The Grinch.

Don't think there's much I need to say here. We all know the story (and the song) about the ghastly green son-of-a-bitch who dared to make the Whos' Christmas anything but stellar.

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (1966) is one of the best out there, and I'm not talking about the absurd Jim Carrey version. I'm talkin' the Karloff-narrated gem that is shown 437 times between Halloween and New Years on TNT.

It is utterly timeless, and I never tire of it.

When he sticks those antlers on the poor dog, and when he steals the last little crumb on the floor...priceless. Though I actually giggle when he is lugging all that shit up the mountain.

At last redeemed by his bursting heart, the Grinch still remains the ultimate Christmas villan because he just wanted to eliminate the holiday altogether. Sometimes, I agree.

*Can I be completely honest when I tell you that Frosty the Snowman is really annoying?
Yes, I always watched it when I was a kid, but now that I'm an adult it really just bugs the hell out of me. And it's not a snowman thing. Quite to the contrary, I actually collect snowmen and love the darn things.

But Frosty?

Okay, I think it comes down to the Happy Birthday thing. WTF?

His voice grates my nerves.
And Karen? What the heck kind of friend is she, making Frosty drag her into a toasty greenhouse up there at the North Pole? I think exposing kids to that kind of thing is cruel. Essentially, Frosty melts into a puddle of goo. Not a nice picture. Almost a horror cartoon.

But then ole Frosty comes back to life and all is well. And it's all Happy Birthday all over again.
Shit.

The main creep in Frosty is Professor Hinkle, the so-called magician.

Despite the fact that he can make it all go away with the stupid magic hat, I still don't like him. Whomever they got to voice these characters just got on my last nerve. Even Jimmy Durante as Frosty jerked my chain.

And if we're being truthful here, Hinkle wasn't the villan of Frosty.
The freakin' SUN took Frosty out!

Heat. Warmth. See-ya.

*In the same holiday vein we have Rudolph's Shiny New Year (1976) - obviously about the new year and not Christmas. The villain in this one is a buzzard.

Yes, you heard right.

For some reason, Father Time has asked Rudolph (in all his infinite wisdom) to find the next Baby New Year before midnight arrives and everyone is doomed.

(Well, I don't know if everyone is doomed, but I think that's what they were going for.)

Aeon the Buzzard wreaks havoc with Rudolph and his

buddies as they search through the various periods of time (this is really dumb, actually) and Ae

on doesn't let up until they actually find the baby and he sees how big the baby's ears are!

It makes Aeon double over in laughter and the day is saved! As is the New Year, natch!

Yikes.

I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that the reason the no longer show this one that often is due to the blatant jokes made at the baby's ears' expense. I mean, that really isn't what you want to teach your kids - how to make fun of someone and get away with it.

*I don't think Charles Dickens could ever imagine all the ways his

timeless story 'A Christmas Carol' would be told.

But no matter how it is delivered, it still tells the same story of redemption.

And ghosts. And one

Long a favorite story of mine (though I'm partial to the George C. Scott 1984 adaption), A Christmas Carol was made into a cartoon starring none other than Mister Magoo.

I have to agree, if Magoo was going to star in a holiday special, this was the one.

Mister Magoo's Christmas Carol (1962) pre-dates even Rudolph, and featured the voice of Jim Backus (aka Thurston Howell, III)!

Also feeding the Dickens' fire was the 1983 special - Mickey's Christmas Carol, which of course gave us Donald Duck as the titular Ebenezer Scrooge character.

While some folks may consider Scrooge the villain here - and he was a rat-bastard for most of the time - I was always scared shitless of the ghost of Christmas Yet To Come. I had nightmares about the ethereal antagonist coming to get me while I slept. Not necessarily the Magoo version, but something of the likes.

The ghost of Xmas future is pretty fat in the above pic, don't you think? What the hell is under all those robes?

Actually, here's the one that haunts my dreams to this day.

And last but certainly not least, we have A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965).
Definitely the most charming and enjoyable of all Christmas specials, the moral here is a religious one, and I, for one, am shocked it continues to still get play. But I'm glad, because it's just simply put- superb.

To find a villain here is difficult, but not impossible. It becomes obvious as you get older that the true bad guy here is commercialism.





When Charlie Brown goes to the Christmas tree lot and sees all the silver and colored aluminum trees, he has a near shit-fit and buys his famous sad little tree.



Dejected further by seeing Snoopy's first place win for his decorated dog house, he takes that moment to add an ornament to his pathetic sapling, effectively killing it.



You don't have to be inherently spiritual to get the basic facts. We all rush around too much, buy too much, and strive to out decorate the Joneses next door - when we should be just enjoying the time we have to spend with our loved ones. At the risk of sounding too sentimental, isn't that what it's all about?

But then again, this post is about villains, right?
So I vote for Lucy as the villain of A Charlie Brown Christmas.



God, she's a bitch!