I have no idea what I want to write.
There are 29 people, mostly women of color, dead this year (that we know of). There are 412 people dead since we started TDoR ten years ago (412--thats only those we know of).
What do you say to that?
Any day now I could find out that one of my friends is dead. Any day now I could find out that one of my friends has been assaulted. I could be assaulted or killed too, but at least my white privilege protects me somewhat.
If anyone still thinks we transition because we think its sexy or to follow a fad...I think you need to put down the ideology and start thinking for yourself.
You can do your own research; we can't cater to you today.
Theres a part of me that wants to go and see if the dead are dancing on the lake again.
You see, when I was a child, in the early morning the bus went past the lake and in November you could see the mist rising off the water.
November is the month the dead come out and dance.
Since its getting towards the end of the month, they will be dancing all night and well into the morning.
"Perhaps they are not the stars, but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy." ~Author Unknown
I hope they are happy. I hope there were enough merry memories in this life. I hope they find even more joy in their next lives.
(lyrics for Tears in Heaven; unable to find them for Dream Journey)
Thursday, November 20, 2008
TDoR
Thursday, September 4, 2008
RNC Brutality
Theres been a bunch of stuff happening that I really should have been blogging about. I'm sorry, but I just wasn't up to it; loads of stuff offline and personal things, but I'm also getting burned out. I am so tired of the same old cardboard arguments getting thrown at us, the same old trolls sapping our energy, and the constant betrayal for crumbs from the kyriarchy. But I'm not the only one and getting tired of getting shit thrown at you and yours is bound to be tiring. I'll rest when I need it and get back to cleaning when I can. ^.~
So, back to what I should be writing about:
RNC. Blackwater, targeting medics(!!!), illegal arrests (journalists!!!), illegal searches(!!!), police brutality(!!!), fascism, actual assassination plots going unpunished (who cares if Obama gets killed), media blackout, gathering info on undesirables...
Need I go on? (no need, BFP has been awesome)
Of course, everyone is focusing on Palin and her baby's baby and not the Illegal Activity the government is participating in. I don't give a fuck about who is preggers and who wasn't.
I give a fuck that the government is stepping up it's fascism and brutality to levels that are obvious to anyone with eyes. How long until this becomes the common way of treating all citizens? (already intersections of POC, queer/trans* folks, homeless folks, poor folks, etc are treated this way)
How long until running to Canada is more than just talk? How long until the doors of moderate straight, white, cis*, men and women are getting broken down because they said something unpatriotic? How long until the S.O.S. men are real?
PS: petition to drop charges against the journalists.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
War
I just got this video from Lisa; and it's...chilling.
I hope to the Gods that this Scott Ritter is exaggerating or mistaken. I do not want nuclear war; do they not know that MAD stands for Mutually Assured Destruction?
I agree with Lisa; we cannot let McCain win.
Almost forgot, Don't click play if you can't handle disturbing video. Including small children who are injured/dead.
ETA: Sorry Andy, I completely forgot to give a summary I watched the video and thought "I have to post this, I am terrified of this possibility"; parts of the video are text though.
Basically its a bunch of quotes from Republicans and various military higher-ups about how McCain is a loose-cannon and the idea of him being POTUS scares the hell out of them.
I'm not sure about the details or the validity of his statements, but the author Scott Ritter is talking about his book and how the Bush administration has made it easier to use nukes on "enemies".
Theres also a lot of quotes from McCain about how we'll be in Iraq for 100 years and how there will be more wars in the next few years (Iran was mentioned as a specific example). Also about how the "young people" in his audience would be serving in those wars.
This makes me hope that if McCain wins, DADT stays in place; because you just know they will make it impossible for us to get out of McCain's draft otherwise. And yes, McCain would like to reinstate the draft. Fyi, my spiritual beliefs would make me unable to participate in a war unless it was entirely defensive (like, if Canada invaded MI) but because I'm not a Christian, and my beliefs aren't written in some holy book, so theres no way they'd let me out of a draft.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Yeah, just more links
Plastics and other commonly-used chemicals may be responsible for early puberty (as in 14-month old babies and 7 year old girls). I already don't eat meat and try to use soaps without chemicals in them...but I know its impossible to get away from them all.
Kate Bornstein on WALL-E. I <3 loneliness, WALL-E, and being trans*.
(I got both links from Helen).
Queen Emily is guestposting on Lisa's blog; she's doing an awesome job looking at common cissexist/transmisogynist tropes. So far, "You're really just a man/woman" and "patriarchal privilege" are up; and the comments are pretty good too imo.
London Pride shouldn't be proud of how they treated (and their non-apology) trans*women. At Pride, trans*women were barred from using the women's restrooms. The stewards called the police on them and the police demanded their gender recognition certificates. WTF.
The People's History of the American Empire (video).
Debs did a "Rape News Round-up".
And now I want to get a few of these books...
Bint Alshamsa tells us not to call her "differently abled".
Measure of Medication from Gehenna.
Over at Radical Masculinity there is a call for discussion about creating healthy models of masculinity. The posts sie (?) links to are very good reading (one of which is a critique of Robert Jenson's views on masculinity, the other is on butch identity and ableism). I highly recommend a lot of the posts on RM; Genderqueer Genders in Society and Masculine Privilege Without Male Privilege? are two great ones.
Also, if I'm still in MI I really want to go to Camp Trans. Is anyone else going?
Type rest of the post here
Wednesday, June 4, 2008
What I've been looking at
NY State Assembly approved GENDA!!!! This means that, if the Senate passes it, you can't be discriminated against based on your gender identity or gender expression; so this also protects folks who aren't trans*, but still don't conform to gender/sex roles.
Barney Frank, John Averwhosis, and the rest of them can go fuck themselves for being cissexist. They should be focusing more on getting legislation like this passed instead of same-sex marriage (as important as that is); numbers don't lie.
More good news, it looks like Obama will win the nomination! Lately, I've mostly been following the nominations from Transgriot because while Monica supports Obama, she doesn't use sexist attacks against Hillary.
Monica's blog is awesome for more than just campiegn stuff, she's got other good news (KY reinstated protections for trans* state employees), posts about being a trans* woman of color (Trans* WOC are not ugly), as wells as other Important Stuff (the increase in homo- and transphobic hate crimes for instance).
In case you weren't aware, Brownfemipower is back and posting!
Female Desire Week is here again!
I'm thinking of getting a new binder, my old one doesn't work so well (especially in this heat); I'm thinking a white Double Front Compression Shirt.
Oh, and weird search terms: "hbs ftm prince" "monster cocks wants students at school" "i want to make my as a monster cock is it possible through surgery" (WTF??) "hentay monster attaking young doctor" (learn to spell; it's hentai and attacks) "ocd fear of being transgender"
Friday, January 11, 2008
"When your heart steals parts that make you feel real"
I happen to have Julia Serano's livejournal friended, and her last entry included a link to the youtube excerpts from several performances in The National Queer Arts Festival's TransForming Community project.
Here are some of my favorite parts of the videos I've watched so far:
"I think it's problematic to occupy male space in the world but to refuse to recognize that that is indeed the space one occupies, and to proceed to shirk the responsibilities that come with that space." --Prado Gomez on trans*men who live and are seen as male, yet refuse to identify as such only when it is inconvenient (not unsafe; inconvenient) for them.
I see this come up in the ftm community on LJ every so often. Usually, someone will make a post that mentions that they go to a women's college--or any other women's space really--and arguments will break out as to whether or not ftm-spectrum people belong in women's space. Personally, I think it is up to each individual and to the specific space sie is entering to figure out if sie belongs. But, I think that if you identify as, and/or are largely seen as a male/man, then you do not belong in a space for women.
I know that there are ftm-spectrum folks out there that do not identify as men, but for those of us that do...it is disrespectful for us to enter woman-only space and it is disrespectful to invite us there.
"They will let him in only if you all agree that this marks him--his former girlness--the thing he hates. Some will approve of your boyfriend's maleness because he passes and he will be the exception when they say ignorant things about other transpeople. Some will tell you about how they like transmen, but they just don't like transwomen--because they're still male. But doesn't that make your boyfriend still female? Well exactly, thats why he's okay, that's why he's in." --Michelle Tea's summary of what often happens within a group of dyke/lesbian/queer friends when one woman starts dating a trans*man.
I'm mostly interested in guys and I've never dated a girl. But this one of the reasons why I won't date a lesbian or go into spaces where guys aren't allowed/welcome. Yes, I am marked by being misgendered most of my life. This does not mean that I am a girl and it doesn't make me any less male. I won't date straight guys either.
"Last week, a woman I thought was my friend decided to teach me, unsolicited I might add, why ftms were welcome in women's space but not mtfs. Because men who used to be women well, they were women and so many women have experienced sexual assault (so have I however...). And we don't want your male energy in our space. What she was really saying was that they didn't your naked body in women's space..." --Shawna Virago on women, trans*women, being kept out of women's spaces.
Trans*women are women; trans*men are men.
Women should be welcomed into women's spaces.
Need I be any clearer on my thoughts?
"I am a straight man. There's nothing wrong with being a straight man. I'm still queer, but now I'm a queer straight man. And just because this is where I have finally felt at home in my body--does not mean that I think all gender bending people need to take hormones or have surgery. So I am confused when differently-gendered people feel the need to share their disgust with surgery or the medical industry with me. I don't like doctors, I'm terrified of needles, and I would rank surgery as one of my least favorite things to do." --Rocco Kayiatos (Katastrophe) on his feelings when some gender variant folks decide to berate him for not being 'queer enough' in their eyes.
"It seems, that one of the biggest challenges with this burgeoning community is the lack of language and deep understanding. There is a trans umbrella term that houses everyone from drag queens to transsexuals. This becomes dangerous, because then well-intentioned but underinformed people make assumptions about an entire community after only knowing one person." --Katastrophe again.
I have to say, I am not generally all that interested in rap, but his songs speak to me. I was so very upset when I realized that the couple of songs I bought off itunes were nontransferable to my new computer and I have been completely unable to find any of his songs on limewire or any of his CDs at stores, though I have searched multiple times. (the title of this post is from Bad, Bad Feelings, by the way)
And his words speak to me here as well:
"I only hope that someday all my friends will understand why they have to sacrifice their own desire to have their band play at Michigan or to hot tub in Osento in order to respect, love me and other transsexuals."
Julia Seranno is of course brilliant, but here are a few of my most favorite bits:
"Well, I'm sorry. But anyone who considers transmen to be women and transwomen to be men is not an ally of the transgender community."
"Sometimes you see things more clearly when you have been made to feel as though you are on the outside looking in."
"And my dyke community needs to realize that the anger they feel when straight people try to dismiss the legitimacy of their relationships is the same kind of anger I feel when they try to dismiss my femaleness."
"And when I call myself trans, it doesn't necessarily signify that I 'transgress the gender binary', but that I straddle two identities--woman and transsexual--that most people insist are in opposition to each other."
"Yes, I do know what those women have been through. I have had men force themselves on me. like you, we trans*women are physically violated and abused for being women too."
I loved Whipping Girl. I took notes in the margins and I intend to reread it after my mind finishes incorporating the knowledge and perspective I gained throughout the first read though.
"I'm proud to be trans*, but I really don't want to have to organize a candle light vigil every night to have my identity respected." --Ryka Aoki de la Cruz on GLB folks and trans*folks.
Of course there are other videos I liked, but these were the excerpts that I found speak to me the most.