What's in a name?
To many of us trans* people, names are important. Unlike most cis* people, we have to choose our names because the names we were given (forced on us?) are not suitable. Very rarely do our parents give us a name we can keep; so that when we tell someone our legal name we are either misgendered or outed immediately.
It seems like there is always a post about names in the general trans* forums I read; recently, there is one asking for names that do not easily get “misheard” and transformed from masculine to feminine.
Many transition guides and trans* resources have posts with tips on choosing names. All sorts of advice is given; don't choose names that are currently trendy (Aiden/Ayden/etc), ask your parents to help, find meanings you like...
Names have power.
I've read a lot of fantasy where magic can be performed by knowing a person or object's true name; where people or demons can be controlled or destroyed by those with their true name.
Here, names have the power to out, to get you extra “random security checks”, to color peoples' gendered perceptions of you, etc.
I'll be changing my name later this week.
To Kristopher [current middle name]-Rivera [lastname].
I didn't exactly choose Kristopher; my friends sometimes called me Ristopher after I started going by my nickname Riss. I'm not Christian, but I liked the name and I felt like Kristopher...suited me somehow. Even friendly acquaintances who didn't know I was questioning said that Kristopher suited me.
Both of my grandmas have the same middle name, so my parents gave it to me—and I chose to keep it because I like it.
Rivera is for Sylvia Rivera, an amazing woman and one of the first trans* people I ever learned about.
With my real name legally recognized I'll be able to apply for college, jobs, etc. without (much) anxiety. I'll be able to attend classes without emailing the teachers to begask to be referred to by my nickname.
There'll be less anxiety around my name, but now when I apply for a job I'll be more worried about my legal sex. Hopefully, they won't notice it or realize it's a mistake.
[I wrote the above last week. I went to court just the other day.]
I was extremely anxious about court; not everyone's name change is granted after all.
Luckily, it went without a hitch.
After going through security in my nice clothes and tie, I spent more time waiting (and listening to half a dozen divorces—and they say queer and trans* people will ruin marriage...) than actually in front of the judge. Seriously, he asked me why I wanted to change my name (personal preference and common usage) and if I was changing it for fraudulent reasons (err, no) then granted it.
Though according to my friend who drove me, whispers did break out in the seats when my case was called; I admit I wasn't paying much attention to them at the time...
And next I get to change my name on my BC and state ID and whatnot.
Showing posts with label transition. Show all posts
Showing posts with label transition. Show all posts
Friday, December 19, 2008
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Link Farming
Lisa and a friend of Ginmar both could use some donations Ginmar's friend could also use some resources for MN sex workers, single moms, etc.
Australia to follow China's lead on censoring the internet? (h/t Ren)GOP is yet again trying to steal the election, except this time they're also accusing Democrats (& ACORN) of voter fraud (h/t). And yes, this does affect trans* people as well as many other oppressed peoples.
Women's Rights advocate, Esha Momeni, was arrested by the Iranian police. She is a student and she went to Iran to work on her Masters thesis on the Iranian women's rights movement.The shit with Stonewall and Julie Bindel is still going on. If you're in the UK near London and can get to the demo, please go and support trans* people.
Yes, saying that trans* people should be morally mandated out of existence or that we should be barred from medically transitioning and instead go through
We are an oppressed group of people that you want to make not exist; what other word would you use for that? Or do you consider what Zucker is doing a "good start"?
"Talk therapies" DO NOT work to "cure" us; they murder: us, our self esteem, our voices, any chance of happiness...
"Talk therapies" are aversion/reparative therapy just as much as electro-shock therapy was. They have tried everything to "cure" us, from drugs to behavioral to the wrong set of hormones, and all they do is suppress our trans*ism and cause us pain and suffering and death.
We don't need curing. We don't need fixing.
Everything that is "wrong" with us can be fixed by fixing this transphobic, kyriarchal society and allowing us to self-determine what sort of transition is best for ourselves. AKA, we aren't in the wrong, y'all are.
(If anyone reading this has a facebook, you can link this on the wall to prove that Bindel has in fact endorsed "ex-trans" therapy).
And yes, I'm ranting and angry and my tone is totally not polite at all. Perhaps if I make her kri ;_; from my m33n words, Bindel should sue me with her e-laywers/gf. ;_;
Fuck the District of Columbia Department of Corrections.
Nix has an awesome excerpt from a lecture he'll be giving on cissexism in criticisms of Boys Don't Cry.
Dear Candidates, there are more colors than "Black, White, and Whatever". "That One" is also quite racist.
Palin is most definitely not an advocate for people with disabilities.
City dwellers and POC are "pro-American" too. I for one, was really moved by Biden's speech.
How black fathers are put on pedestals at the expense of black mothers via Womanist-Musings.
This is an interesting look at [transsexual-centric] transition; especially the difficulties of. One thing I'd like to add on the subject of Mike/Christine's re-transition, is that a number of trans* people have transitioned, re-transitioned, and then later transitioned again (often in a different way and/or to a more genderqueer gender). Most of the stories I've heard said that the pain, danger, etc of transition caused them to re-transition until they were in a better place or were more prepared for the hurdles of transition.
Happy news, I'm going to try Nanowrimo! Yeah, I know I haven't been updating much, but I hope this will get rid of my writers block and apathy.
ETA: I've also slightly edited my definitions post.
Friday, June 20, 2008
Actual good news
Apparently, it's time for congress to have it's first ever meeting on trans* issues!
"The hearing, "An Examination of Discrimination Against Transgender Americans in the Workplace," is scheduled for Thursday, June 26, 2008 at 10:30 am in room 2175 of Rayburn House Office Building. Congressman Rob Andrews (D-NJ) called the hearing as Chairman of the Health, Education, Labor, and Pensions (HELP) subcommittee of the Committee on Education and Labor."
And earlier, the American Medical Association (AMA) said that trans*folk should get our medical needs covered under insurance.
Hopefully some real change results from this...
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