17-year-old Billey Joe Johnson

Just saw this at Renee's:

On December 8th, 17-year-old Billey Joe Johnson died from a gunshot wound to the head. Police say he killed himself with a shotgun after being stopped for a simple traffic violation in Lucedale, Mississippi.^[1] Several things seem to cast doubt on the official story, including an independent investigation that concluded it would have been impossible for the shot that killed Johnson to have been self-inflicted.

Many on the ground smell a murder and a cover-up. We don't have all the answers, but it's clear that in the racially divided town of Lucedale, all the ingredients exist for a miscarriage of justice.

I've joined ColorOfChange.org in demanding answers and justice for Billey Joe's family. Together, we can help ensure that the District Attorney feels the presence of a national spotlight, and let him know that anything short of a thorough investigation will result in massive attention and a call for outside intervention.

Please join me. It takes only a moment:

http://www.colorofchange.org/billeyjoe/?id=2044-495171

From the beginning, the District Attorney has treated the investigation of Billey Joe's death as a suicide or the result of an accidental self-inflicted injury. Based on his public statements and interactions with Billey Joe's family, it appears that the District Attorney hasn't looked into whether Billey Joe was killed by an officer or someone else. Again, we don't have all the answers, but here's what we do know:

- Billey Joe was at his former girlfriend's house minutes before the killing.^[2] He never entered the house, but police were called to respond to an attempted burglary there.^[3] This fact was not a part of the original story given by the police.

- Billey Joe's family say that his ex-girlfriend had been staying at her father's house because her mother threw her out for dating Billey Joe (she is White and Billey Joe was Black). They said Billey Joe knew to only go to the house when the girl's father was not present, that the two of them were on good terms even after he had broken up with her, and that the breakup was largely because of pressure from her father. The family also claims that there is a relationship between the officer present at the scene of Billey Joe's death and the girl's father.

- A witness heard two shots, not one, at the scene where Billey Joe died, according to an independent investigation launched by the Mississippi NAACP. The pathologist in that investigation has indicated that it would be impossible for a bullet from a a self-inflicted shot to enter in the manner that it did. He also said that given the length of Billey Joe's arms and the length of the shotgun, it would have been impossible for him to hold the weapon and fire it at himself.

- Billey Joe was a star athlete with scholarship offers from more than half a dozen schools. No one--including family, friends, and coaches--could think of a reason that Billey Joe would want to end his life.^[4,5,6]

A true investigation would sort out fact from rumour. But we can't be sure that Johnson's family will get the investigation it deserves. In the case of the Jena 6 we saw a District Attorney and a judge incapable of carrying out justice in a racially charged environment. In the recent case of the murder of Oscar Grant by police (and many like it), we see how unlikely it is for District Attorneys to do their job when the suspect is an officer of the law. But in both these cases, public pressure has made all the difference by shining a spotlight on local authorities.

In the case of Billey Joe Johnson, we're looking for the truth and for justice. A minute of your time can help ensure his family gets both:

http://www.colorofchange.org/billeyjoe/?id=2044-495171

References:

1. http://tinyurl.com/aul9hd
2. http://www.sunherald.com/local/story/1050689.html
3. http://www.wkrg.com/news/flash_paper/12_19_08_billy_joe_johnson/
4. http://transcripts.cnn.com/TRANSCRIPTS/0812/17/cnr.07.html
5. http://tinyurl.com/cs7cjm
6. http://www.denverpost.com/headlines/ci_11280331

Fuck you coppers, my baby sister (also white), who is only a little bit younger than Billey, was able to say that there is something fishy about this "suicide"; if you won't, you are either stupid or just fucking racist (or both). And last time i wrote about corrupt police officers I asked for slang names that weren't pig; wiki has a list--I'll be using DRC (dirty rotten cops).

A woman was set on fire outside the club she worked at.
ETA: Here is some info on how you can help her. She is in stable condition, despite the burns on 60% of her body. She's going to need a lot of financial help as she has kids, won't be able to work at all for a while, and her previous job is no longer available.

They are attempting to forcibly divorce the same-sex couples who got married before Prop 8. Gin posts a video from various couples and their kids asking not to divorce them.

The UK will be forcing trans* people to buy two national ID cards; Helen has a post up at her blog with a lot of info and a petition and an abridged version that has more links in the comments at QT.

Zucker is attempting to suppress the truth about him on Lynn Conway's website by saying that she has caused irreparable harm to his career with libelous accusations.
Hopefully, this "irreparable harm" bit means we'll be hearing that him and his buddy Ray have been kicked out of the DSM-V committee...Please, please, please, can I get this for my birthday???

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If you saw something; say something

Another Memphis Trans* Woman Shot:
Here we go again in Memphis, TN. A transwoman was shot in the face and is in critical condition.

Memphis police say the shooting happened sometime around 5:00 a.m. Tuesday, December 23, 2008 in the 3100 block of Boxtown Road in south Memphis near T.O. Fuller State Park. Leeneshia Edwards was last seen about an hour earlier at the “C.K.’s Coffee Shop” on Union Avenue in midtown Memphis.

Edwards' cousin reports that Lenneshia was shot in the jaw, side and back and is undergoing multiple surgeries.

So peeps in the Memphis area, if you saw anything that night, do us and the family of Leeneshia Edwards a favor. Call Memphis Crime Stoppers if you have any information about either this case, Ebony Whitaker's or Duanna Johnson's at (901) 528-CASH that gets the po-po's one step closer to resolving these crimes. Remember, the peeps that did this could one day strike your family, so the sooner you get them off the streets and behind bars, the safer Memphis becomes for you as well.

For those of us who live in Memphis and beyond, keep Leeneshia in your prayers this holiday season.

When the 110th Congress opens for business,, as soon as an ENDA bill is filed, we need to demand that it not only include transgender people, but it be passed without delay.

(h/t Monica)

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TDoR

I have no idea what I want to write.
There are 29 people, mostly women of color, dead this year (that we know of). There are 412 people dead since we started TDoR ten years ago (412--thats only those we know of).
What do you say to that?
Any day now I could find out that one of my friends is dead. Any day now I could find out that one of my friends has been assaulted. I could be assaulted or killed too, but at least my white privilege protects me somewhat.
If anyone still thinks we transition because we think its sexy or to follow a fad...I think you need to put down the ideology and start thinking for yourself.
You can do your own research; we can't cater to you today.


Theres a part of me that wants to go and see if the dead are dancing on the lake again.
You see, when I was a child, in the early morning the bus went past the lake and in November you could see the mist rising off the water.
November is the month the dead come out and dance.
Since its getting towards the end of the month, they will be dancing all night and well into the morning.

"Perhaps they are not the stars, but rather openings in Heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy." ~Author Unknown

I hope they are happy. I hope there were enough merry memories in this life. I hope they find even more joy in their next lives.



(lyrics for Tears in Heaven; unable to find them for Dream Journey)

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Another one

So soon after Duanna another trans* woman of color has been killed.
Teish Cannon (Also known as Lateisha Green) was murdered on Friday.

And guess what, you guessed it, none of the articles have respected her gender. Her family did, but the newspapers would rather make fun of her.
"Cannon's family accepted his sexual orientation. Pictures of Cannon in women's clothing were on display in the family's living room, and the family selected one for The Post-Standard to publish. Often when family members spoke of Cannon, they used 'she' to refer to him."
How fucking kind of them to put that in there.

Oh hey, guess who else is disrespecting her identity and calling her a gay dude?
But hey, at least the cis*gay blogs are talking about her, unlike Duanna!!!
Fuck them all with a hatchet.

ETA:

First of all, a big thank you to all of those out there who contributed to the funeral fund for Ms. Johnson's family. Hopefully we will not have to do anything like that again, but should that happen it is good to know that people DO care. TTPC reported donations from as far away as Japan and that the bulk of the sum came from small-dollar contributions. It just goes to show that all of us can make a difference if we work together. Sounds hokey, but it's true.


However, now we must remember why Duanna Johnson was so important. She stood up and said she wasn't going to take abuse and brutality by the MPD anymore. She shone a light into the darkness that is the MPD's practice of profiling trans women of color as prostitutes as well as their treatment of trans women in their custody. In the wake of that, the local progressive organizations have been trying to have a responsive dialogue with the Memphis City Council, the MPD, and the Shelby County Sheriffs Department, largely to no avail.

This is what we demand:

* An LGB and T liaison within the MPD and Sheriff's department.

* An end to police profiling and harassment of trans women of color.

* A TBI (TN Bureau of Investigation) investigation of the MPD and Duanna's murder. The FBI was already investigating the MPD when Duanna was killed; she had signed the paperwork to go ahead with the lawsuit against MPD shortly before being killed. While I am not suggesting that the MPD or anyone associated with the department killed her, it is a gross conflict of interest for the MPD to be investigating her death. The DA, Bill Gibbons, has not yet requested an investigation and until he does, the TBI does not have jurisdiction.

* An actual investigation of Ebony Whitaker's murder.


What you can do:

* Call DA Gibbons at (901) 545-5900 to ask why his office is not pursuing a TBI investigation of the MPD given the fact that Duanna was suing them and the glaring conflict of interest that an investigation by them into her death would be. Also remind him of the murders of Tiffany Berry and Ebony Whitaker and let him know that though he may want to forget, we have not forgotten.

* Call Police Director Larry Godwin at (901) 545-5700 to ask why, given the problems Memphis has had recently with transphobic hate crimes, there is no LGBT liaison within the MPD. Mention that many, if not most, major cities have one. And ask whether or not Bridges McRae and James Swain will face any criminal charges, or will Director Godwin will continue his witch hunt for who leaked the video. Ask why it took over 4 months and some bad publicity (after trying to recruit at Mid-South Pride, of all places) for them to be fired. Ask what kind of training in dealing with TS/TG people in custody are officers given? And while you're at it, remind him of Tiffany Berry and Ebony Whitaker, too.

* Call Sheriff Mark Luttrell at (901) 545-5500 and ask why there is no LGBT liaison. Ask what kind of training in dealing with TG/TS people in custody is done.

* Finally, email and write mainstream publications that purport to serve the LGBT community and strongly encourage them to give this story more exposure. While The Advocate did post a short news piece on its website, a publication with this much clout that claims to represent LGB and T people can do better. Same for Southern Voice and others.


Email and IM this to all your friends! Link back here if you want, I don't care how the information is disseminated as long as it is done respectfully. Remember, Duanna was a sister, daughter, cousin, and friend to many. She was loved and she will be missed, even by those who did not know her personally but who knew what she did. She stood up and said 'no more' and was cut down while literally trying to get away from all of this madness..

ETA2: And not only were Duanna and Lateisha murdered this month, but so was Aimee Wilcoxson and Dilek Ince was killed in Turkey on the 11th.
According to the TDoR website, 27 names will be added to the list as well as two unknown Iraqi women who were killed with Ali (that post is super-problematic, but its the one I could find with a lot of info).

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Heres the story I just finished for Nanowrimo, For Duanna.

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back

Back from my grandparents house. OMG, I really dislike my grandma. I have to fight her to do any cleaning beyond dishes! I had to dust the walls/ceilings in secret because she got mad at me for doing it. o.0
I wanted to tackle a bit of the mess they call an attic, but noooo.... I can't be moving her precious shit around and actually putting it into boxes and stacking it neatly and getting rid of the obvious trash! GRRR.....


And there is way too much shit to process going on in the world:

Apparently Minnesota is all "yay forced electroshock-[torture]!!!"
And Duanna Johnson was murdered. Most likely by ex-officers Bridges McRae, James Swain, and/or their buddies on the force.
And the fucking [police]** don't have any leads. Because its not like she was beaten by two police officers a few months ago--which led to their being fired. Its not like she went public and was suing the city or anything (though the lawsuit will be going forward!). Its not like she was being harassed by the police for "prostitution" (aka: existing while black and trans* and a woman. and even if she was a sex worker, she may not even have been working at that moment).
**Does anyone know of a slur for the police other than "pigs"? I'm not a fan of pigs because of the fatphobic associations with the word pig.
Despite having a relative who was an officer (who does still have my respect), I have lost all respect for the institution and all members unless the individual proves they are not a power-hungry, abusive, rapist, bigot.

ETA: A paypal account has been set up to help Duanna's mom pay for her funeral.

Folks who think that prop 8 passed because of t3h 3vil POC can go DIAF. Seriously, blame the mostly white mormons and catholics for funding the bigoted/lying campaigns. Or maybe your own organizations' racism and FAIL.Yes, I am in a bad and violent mood.
Uppity Brown Woman is also angry about several things; like Duanna's murder, "honor" killings, and lesbians being beaten for daring to pick their kids up from school.

Who'd have thunk that preaching racist anti-immigrant hatred all over the USA government/media would result in folks going out "beaner hunting"?
In other news, bears do, in fact, shit in the woods.


And I am totally failing at Nanowrimo; I have practically nothing written because of being at grandparents house and various apathy/depression things leading to writers block. But after I (eventually) get some sleep I'll post some of what I have in my lj (needs m0ar editing...). Theres also a story for Duanna; as she is unlikely to get justice.

But here is a killer bunneh and some pretty guys (yep, all three are guys) because I need some smiles and pwetty.

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Some bits of bittersweet

Allen Ray Andrade, murderer of Angie Zapata, was just charged at his preliminary hearing with first-degree murder after deliberation, bias-motivated crime, felony motor vehicle theft and felony identity theft in her death. The case will go back to court on November 16th. Helen has a lot more info, and links to her previous writings on Angie's murder and murderer. I hope he gets life in prison with no chance of parole ever.

Police finally confirm that there was no violence on the part of the trans* folks at London Pride.


A federal court found that the Library of Congress refusing to hire Diane Schroer because she was transitioning is a clear-cut case of discrimination based on sex. This sets an amazing precedent and hopefully the court of appeals will agree with this amazing ruling.
I really like this part:

Imagine that an employee is fired because she converts from Christianity to Judaism. Imagine too that her employer testifies that he harbors no bias toward either Christians or Jews but only "converts." That would be a clear case of discrimination "because of religion." No court would take seriously the notion that "converts" are not covered by the statute. Discrimination "because of religion" easily encompasses discrimination because of a change of religion. But in cases where the plaintiff has changed her sex, and faces discrimination because of the decision to stop presenting as a man and to start appearing as a woman, courts have traditionally carved such persons out of the statute by concluding that "transsexuality" is
unprotected by Title VII. In other words, courts have allowed their focus on the label "transsexual" to blind them to the statutory language itself.

This isn't bittersweet, its just wrong:

Troy Davis was denied clemency last week by the Georgia Board of Pardons and Parole and is scheduled to be executed on September 23, next Tuesday, despite the tremendous amount of doubt that surrounds his conviction. Besides the Board of Pardons and Parole, the only entity that can stop the execution is the US Supreme Court. However, Amnesty International sent out an action alert today that states that the Board of Pardons and Parole can still reconsider its decision
...
Amnesty International is asking that people send emails and letters to the Georgia Board of Pardons and Parole urging that they reconsider their decision in the face of the considerable doubt cast upon Troy Davis’ guilt. Please take a few moments to do this; this may be one of the last chances that Troy Davis has to escape being murdered unjustly by the state.

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RNC Brutality

Theres been a bunch of stuff happening that I really should have been blogging about. I'm sorry, but I just wasn't up to it; loads of stuff offline and personal things, but I'm also getting burned out. I am so tired of the same old cardboard arguments getting thrown at us, the same old trolls sapping our energy, and the constant betrayal for crumbs from the kyriarchy. But I'm not the only one and getting tired of getting shit thrown at you and yours is bound to be tiring. I'll rest when I need it and get back to cleaning when I can. ^.~

So, back to what I should be writing about:

RNC. Blackwater, targeting medics(!!!), illegal arrests (journalists!!!), illegal searches(!!!), police brutality(!!!), fascism, actual assassination plots going unpunished (who cares if Obama gets killed), media blackout, gathering info on undesirables...
Need I go on? (no need, BFP has been awesome)
Of course, everyone is focusing on Palin and her baby's baby and not the Illegal Activity the government is participating in. I don't give a fuck about who is preggers and who wasn't.
I give a fuck that the government is stepping up it's fascism and brutality to levels that are obvious to anyone with eyes. How long until this becomes the common way of treating all citizens? (already intersections of POC, queer/trans* folks, homeless folks, poor folks, etc are treated this way)
How long until running to Canada is more than just talk? How long until the doors of moderate straight, white, cis*, men and women are getting broken down because they said something unpatriotic? How long until the S.O.S. men are real?

PS: petition to drop charges against the journalists.

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Various links and a wittle rant

This is why I want a gun of my own.
(Triggering)

A Philadelphia judge has acquitted the killer of a trans woman of murder charges, despite an impassioned plea by the prosecutor that malice was behind the shooting. At the end of a three-hour bench trial on Aug. 18, Common Pleas Judge Jeffrey P. Minehart convicted Terron Oates of voluntary manslaughter in the death of Alexis King.
[...]
Minehart didn’t explain his ruling, but it appears he accepted the defense’s position that Oates acted in the heat of passion after he picked up King for sex in February 2006, then shot her twice after realizing she was a biological male.
[...]
“Mr. Oates isn’t so naïve that he can’t find a gun,” she said. “He has an illegal gun in his car, he’s out at five o’clock in the morning on a school night and he’s going to a strip club when he’s underage. He’s sophisticated enough to be doing those things. Yet the defense portrayed him as an innocent, naïve little boy.”

Oh "trans panic" defense don't we hate you; though cis*folks are all too ready to believe you even when the evidence completely disproves you:

Oates told police he didn’t realize King’s biological status until King grabbed Oates’ hand and placed it on King’s penis, inside the car.

Oates did not testify during the trial but his early statements to police were read for the record.

However, Sgt. Daniel Dutch, who’s worked undercover as a “john” in the area, testified that he’s never heard of — nor experienced — such behavior by a transgender sex worker.

To the contrary, transgender sex workers normally go out of their way to avoid having the johns touch their penises, Dutch said.

And medic William Murphy, who administered emergency care to King after she was shot, testified that King’s penis was “tucked” between her legs, held in place by her panties, when he got to her.

The shooting happened in the Nicetown section, near the intersection of Bott and Kerbaugh streets. King was shot twice, from the side and rear, according to the medical examiner’s report.

Her body was found about 120 feet from Oates’ car, where she collapsed in a pool of blood, evidently trying to run for safety, said Feeney.

McMonagle [the defense attorney] said the shooting happened during “pandemonium” in Oates’ car, after he felt King’s penis, tussled with her for Oates’ pistol, then King moved toward him.

But Feeney refuted that scenario.

“At no time was she ever coming toward him when he shot her, because she was shot from the side and rear,” Feeney said. “That tells you right there that the defendant is lying. If you’re coming toward someone, your front would get shot.”

She said Oates’ actions after the shooting also contradict a heat-of-passion defense.

“He immediately got rid of the weapon,” Feeney continued. “If you can’t think straight, you’re not going to do that. Then he calls 911, does this act on the phone about a robbery and unknown gunman and lies to the responding officer and detectives. To me, that shows a pretty good presence of mind, don’t you think?”

Because Ms. King would totally put herself in danger (and out of a paycheck at the least) by being "sexually aggressive" and forcing her john to acknowledge that she isn't a cis*woman. Because, while getting shot in the back, she would totally be tucking herself back in. Then, more magic powers here, she would teleport herself and her blood into the street (not a hospital).
Fuck that noise.
If there are any mutants or aliens with super powers in Philly, I nominate Judge Jeffrey P. Minehart and Terron Oates as the next recipients of your justice. And, please, only mutants and aliens with super powers; we all know ('cause Marvel told us so) that you folks aren't real vigilantes and you always do things for the right reasons and never get caught.


Helen is asking What If?
I'd like to ask too. So, transphobes whether you be feminist or Christian or just an average Joe/Jane, what the fuck do you expect us to do in your utopia? I know we've been told to pray harder, examine our beliefs, and choose a different life...but what if that doesn't work or we are post bottom surgery? Do we join the priesthood (despite some of us not believing), do we kill ourselves?
What exactly do your theories mean for us--the real live trans* people?

Fuck ableism. Making a woman crawl off a plane, beg for a frigin bathroom break?
Fuck the comments too; access to water and a bathroom are human rights. So is basic respect and dignity.

OMG, the military discriminates against trans* folk! Who knew?

But hey, the APA said they're going to try to take a leading role in ending discrimination based on gender identity! Though for some reason this sounds hollow to me (maybe because Zucker was on the task force and will still be working on the DSM-V).

Shout out to Rozk; and her awesome post about how transphobic feminists can and do really hurt trans* folk and anyone who cares for trans* folk.

Shout out to Cedar; I especially like this piece.

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Fucking Hell

I love how much privilege us trans* folk, especially trans* women get.

While so many of you radfems are trying to prove how m33n we are and how we are all liars and can't possibly be telling the twuth about ourselves and how you must know more about "trannyism" than us...
This SHIT was happening!

(Warning for triggers and RAGE)

Kellie Telesford's murderer, Shanniel Hyatt, was declared innocent because she must have killed herself in a kinky sex game and then covered herself with a blanket after he stole her stuff. trans* women, especially black trans* women, have magic powers and are all into kinky sex games! And even if he did kill her, she is a tranny and of color and into kink and probably a slutty whore and she deceived him, so obviously she deserved it. *sneer*

I just missed another anniversary of death.

A neighborhood is harassing sex workers, especially the trans* ones. Because obviously trans* sex workers create all sorts of crime, and they can totally go get high paying jobs with no fucking problem.

And on the radio and TV we have folks dehumanizing more trans* women!
Because Ange Zapata also deserved to her her head smashed in with a fire extinguisher.
And any trans* woman willing to go on TV deserves to get all the fucking tranny jokes you can think of thrown at her.

Zucker and other fucking quacks are being invited to speak on "GID" youth.
Because reparative therapy works so fucking well.

Vancouver Rape "relief" is proven to be fucking bigoted assholes.


I have to hold in my rage and tears. I can't scream and cry and break things.
I can't because I'm at home and I can't let my parents know how much danger being trans* is.
I can't let them worry that much.

Here is my dirty little secret:

I want to put on my most angry music and destroy something.
I want those super powers I've been told we use to destroy feminism.

I want to fly to Shanniel Hyatt's home and destroy him.
I want to hear my metal-enclosed fist break Anthony Tyrone Biscoe's face.
I would like to tear Adrian Williams' mind to shreds and watch him gibber in a corner.
I want to watch the blood flow after I cut Allan Ray Andrade's throat.

And I am not all that violent of a person; vegetarian and anti-war and all.

Where is our super hero?
Where can I find out masked crusader?
How long till we get our Bruce Wayne, or even our Magneto?

Because we don't get justice.
We get told we deserved it.
If the police won't help us, if they take part in raping and killing us, it seems like we will need to make our own justice.
And I am beyond pissed off right now.


ETA: Just remember straight and/or cis*folks, you don't have to be queer or trans* to be killed by a heterosexist/transphobic person.

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Waiting

So, since my sister is ill and my mom doesn't want to drive back alone from dropping me off, I have to wait to go to Camp trans till the morrow. No, I don't drive. Trust me, you don't want me driving, we would all die.
But yeah, that means no internet for a few days. Yay Camp Trans! ^.^
I was commenting on the F Word, but I bowed out because I thought I was leaving.
I can be quite mean when I want to be (just ask my sister); why should I comment there if I am told I was too mean when I wasn't even trying? Perhaps I just have a tougher hide since I'm used to the snark comms on LJ; Rachel should be happy it was me commenting and not Drea. Drea would have made her cry. ^.^ I <3 style="font-weight: bold;">am quite mean and I need to improve my tone.
Apparently, calling a trans* woman by nongendered pronouns when it is quite obvious she identifies as a woman and uses female pronouns (everyone uses female pronouns for her; it isn't hidden) is not sufficient evidence of a commenter's disrespect. Apparently, many people believe that if an oppressed person is too mean, those in the oppressive group don't have to care or listen; oppressed people must beg appropriately for our rights. If we are too mean, if we don't use the proper tone, we aren't deserving of rights or being listened to. (go greased lighteningwite magik, go wite magik!)

What I was reading and what I think you should read.
Message Received, by Woman.
"Even if it turns out that trans people provide scientific proof that gender is something that exists as a real biological phenonmenon rather than a strictly social construct, feminism remains intact. Sexism and the resulting oppression of women is a social construct, because it is founded on the idea that gender is a binary with proscribed behavioral expectations for either side. Transgenderism simply provides another dimension to the ideology of feminism: the fascinating idea that gender is far more complex than binaries.
...
There really isn’t any good reason not to allow trans women into feminist women-only safe spaces if they identify as women, only fears that the patriarchy gives us, and we have far more reason to reject that then we do to deny the inclusion of trans people whose fundamental premise (again, when you really listen) is a rejection of the patriarchal definition of gender."

Sweden is proposing to make sterilization mandatory for all trans* people who wish to medically transition. What was that we were saying about how horribly trans* people are treated by doctors? Honestly, medical questions are the most common questions to be asked in many of the trans* forums I read. Not only questions with finding decent doctors, finding therapists who won't turn you away, but asking questions that their doctors can't answer because they don't know or care about trans* health. Asking, because they may be afraid of even going to a doctor, if x symptom could be a result of their hormones; even if they aren't afraid of doctors they may be afraid that their doctor will take away their hormones. BTW, Nick Gorton's free book is recommended for learning about trans*men's health.

Its the Trans Agenda!!!

Debi Crow on Angie Should Still be Here. (fyi, women-only commenting)
"The point I am going to make is a simple one: Angie Zapata's life, and her murder, are just as important, equally as important as those of the 2 women a week who die in this country[the UK] at the hands of husbands, boyfriends, or male relatives. Just as important. And the women here dying every week are just as important, equally as important as Angie Zapata, and all the other trans women and men who are murdered for being trans.
...
And if you are a feminist who is concerned about the epidemic of male violence against women, but do not think that the death of a trans woman is that important, or anything you need to concern yourself with, you are not only lost, but also wrong."

More from Debi, the roma are being horrifically persecuted. Now the government is trying to mandate finger printing to control "thieves" and "immigrants".

A Letter to Kyle Payne from Outis.
I left a comment on his site, but he deleted it. I basically told him that Ren and the other "pro-porners" in the "smear campiegn" are better feminists than he is; given that he's raped a woman and all.

BFP thinks on how Angie is Latina, will this be used as another excuse to let Andrade off? Was this another reason Andrade felt she was less than human?
"Angie’s murderer may have assaulted her to find out if she was a ‘real’ woman–but he listened to her name, the way she spoke, he noticed her skin color, the clothes she wore–and ALL of those things, along with whatever he thought he felt or didn’t feel when he assaulted Angie, came together in his mind to create “it”–a thing worthy of murder, a thing nobody would care about if she came up missing."
Unfortunately, very, very true. Trans* women of color, especially if they are poor or are sex workers, are the ones most often killed and beaten and raped. Race, trans* status, her gender as a woman, her actual or supposed job as a sex worker, her class, these all an more come together to create a nonhuman in the eyes of the kyriarchy.

Ren's feeling better! Hopefully she won't scar and can get back to work soon. ^.^
She also has another list of folks writing on Payne.

Belle has written on Angie and how London Pride called for back-up against the trans* women who just wanted to take a piss. Later, one trans* woman was sexually assaulted after she was forced to use the mens bathrooms.

I haven't had time to read it yet, but Julia Serano published an article in Alternet (apparently, the comments are disgusting though).

I'm a little wary of linking to theFword due to how the tone argument got thrown at me and Emily, but I really like this post. Laura's rethinking her devotion to the "gender is entirely a social construct" theory. Personally, I think it is obvious that she still is against sexism and rigidly defined gender roles. Most trans* people are too you know. Rigidly defined gender roles need to be banished; genders should not have any scripted roles, especially not ones that are enforced with violence. We need to separate gender from assigned sex, gender and sex from gender roles, gender from orientation, etc. Trans* people are not inherently in the way of this (some individuals are of course, but then so are many cis* folks).

Miss Crip Chick's entire front page is interesting and awesome.

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Triggers: Angie, may you rest in peace with those who respect you

One of the phrases that google sends my way the most is "too fucking easy". It links to a post where I linked to someone's essay on how easy it is to kill a trans*person. My post is about both Sanesha Stewart and Cameron McWilliams; she was murdered for being trans* and sie was a possibly trans* child who killed hirself.

Since then, and I have been lax about reporting, Ebony Whitaker and Angie Zapata have both been brutally murdered for the great crime against humanity--being trans*.
Angie's killer, Allen Ray Andrade, is going to use the "trans panic" defense; aka, it tricked me and so I had to kill it.

Trans*people, especially trans*women of color who might be prostitutes, are not worthy of life. And when they touch you, the murderer, or worse--someone finds out they actually touched you, you have to destroy them.
You, murderer, can't just kill, not, you have to destroy them as much as possible.
Then, after they are dead and gone, you, all, have to dehumanize them and disrespect their very being.
You, the media, just have to use their old name; and if they changed it, you still call their real name an 'allius' or a 'nickname'.
You, the courts and police, just have to ignore the evidence and never bother searching for the killer. If you deign to look, you let him off with barely a slap. And everyone, and I mean just about everyone, ignores it; business as usual; no one of any real importance, no person, was killed or anything.

Fuck that noise.

Angie was 18. Eight-teen.
Why the fuck is someone so young in the morgue? Why is she in the ground, when she had just barely begun to live her life (not lifestyle).
She's barely more than a child...

And fuck everyone that says she should have known, shouldn't have been meeting folks off the internet, shouldn't have "deceived" him, shouldn't have led him on, shouldn't have worn that short skirt.
As I said in a LJ comm, the reason why we are told we have to disclose is cissexism. Obviously, one part if that is that if we don't disclose we could be attacked if they find out. We are "supposed" to disclose in a safe place where they can't murder us.

But the reason why we are attacked is because we "lied".
We duped.
We fooled.
We messed with your assumptions.
We are assumed to be cis* (and not intersexed).
I blame the entire concept of "we have to disclose" on cissexism.
The main reason we have to disclose is that the other person(s) assume that we are cissexual (as well as not intersexed).
Because they assumed we were a cissexual person, they assumed they knew what our genitals basically look like (and what they used to look like).
When they find out their assumption is wrong, it is suddenly our fault they assumed something incorrect.
Therefore, cis* privilege and cis*-centered thought says that we were lying/deceiving/fooling an innocent person and that we need to disclose to be "honest" with someone. (can you see my sneer at the word honest?)
It would be unthinkable to accuse a cis*guy of deceiving someone when they assumed he was circumcised when he was actually not.
It's perfectly alright to have a preference for certain genital configurations. But it is your own fault if you forget to ask and find out your assumption was wrong.
And your hurt feelings are never an excuse to hurt someone else; a polite "no thanks, I'm more into xyz" would suffice.
In the perfect world no one would have to disclose; no one would assume you were cis*; everyone would, when negotiating sex and/or relationships, bring up their genital configuration as a matter of course.


I keep trying to put into words what Angie's death means.
What knowing another sister is gone forever feels like.
How I'm sure her friends and family already feel her loss.
I can't.
I'm no great poet.

But Angie, Ebony, Sanesha, Gwen, Brandon, Tyra, Robert, and all the people whose names we never knew, but nonetheless mourn, will be remembered.

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Are you listening?

An open letter to cis feminists

Stop fucking up.*

I have complained numerous times that the feminist blogosphere, such as it is, has one main conversation about trans people, one that is returned to again and again and again - the political implications of our transitioning. Click here if you want yet another example of pointless bloody "analysis."

I don't CARE about whatever horrible thing some feminist has said anymore. I care that these discussions centre on cis concerns, even (maybe especially) allies respond mostly to the slurs, but rarely address the real issues.

Now, if you want to have those conversations, here's an idea. Subject yourself to the same kind of analysis. Honestly interrogate if and how you might have more or less privilege than trans people. And no, for the millionth time, trans women are not the fucking Patriarchy.

Or how bout this for an idea. Spend some actual time and energy on trans issues. Here is one thing you are barely talking about - the continual violence against transgendered people for being transgendered.

Blog about Angie Zapata. Blog about Ebony Whitaker. Blog about Sanesha Stewart (to name just three trans women murdered this year).

Try subjecting all that torturous analysis to something actually useful - how violence against trans people occurs. Try thinking about the fact that it is overwhelming trans women of colour being murdered. Try thinking about the intersections between race, transness, misogyny and sex work.

Try writing about the way that institutions collude with this violence - that medical professionals may willingly leave you to die, that police may not prosecute, that lawyers use "trans panic" as a defence to justify the death, and then to add insult to injury, the media effectively blames the dead person for their own deaths AND misgenders them.

And for fuck's sake, don't blame the fucking victims.

I DARE YOU.

* if this doesn't apply to you, then it doesn't apply to you.

So far, a fair number of folks have linked or posted on this too.

I have to admit, I do sometimes focus on the concerns of cis*feminists. It is easier to spork the latest Trans Activist Privilege Checklist instead of writing on how insurance and hospitals refuse to treat us or, if they deign to look at us, give us subpar care. It does feel like it is easier (and cheaper) to change the minds of cis* feminists than cis* politicians.
I also don't like covering the latest deaths/beatings because a) its depressing (gods is it depressing) b) there are never any respectful, decent articles and c) they are never ending. You post on one death/beating and a few days later theres another.
I just can't deal with it; and I feel so wrong for not being able to since I'm not the one whose existence was destroyed.

(Disclaimer: if it don't apply to you, then it don't fucking apply)
I am getting so tired of trans* 101. I am so over "justify your existence to meee!!!"
I want to be able to have a post on TDoR without fucking cis*people stating or telling us they have issues with "transgender politics". I want to be able to x-post or read a trans*-related post on a "general" feminist or progressive forum or blog or LJ comm without rampant cissexism in the comments.
I would really like to go one month without any beatings or rapes or murders of trans*folk. Just one month where we are all considered human and worthy of respect.
Why the fuck do trans* folks have to justify our existence, have to prove that we and our gender identity deserve respect?
Why, when we point out that X cis*feminist has written and worked against us, are we told that we should "put that aside" because she has done "so much for [cis*]women"? Why do we have to bring it up, why can't we focus on the real issues.
Why do I have to have a disclaimer so that I don't hurt the feelings of some poor cis*person? Hellsbells, even if we do put up a disclaimer poor, put-upon, cis*folks will still get all butthurt.

Well, why the fuck can't you just listen? Just shut up and listen. That's what members of the privileged group are supposed to do. I shut up when sex workers talk, when people with disabilities talk, when people of color talk.
When trans* people talk, cis* folk are supposed to listen!
And no, I don't fucking care if you disagree with "trans politics" and therefore aren't cis*--only normal or FAB or whatever (though I do think you can go fuck a lead post).

There are no "trans agendas," no "transgender politics," no "trans lobby."
There is no reason for you to "deconstruct" transgender--the kyriarchy already does it with every murder.
The next time you laugh at a tranny joke, "is it a him or a her? no, it's a shim!" why don't you think about your reaction to a similarly dehumanizing joke about your oppressed group?
The next time you promote someone, a feminist even, who is unabashedly cissexist without mentioning it, why don't you think about how you'd feel if someone promoted a racist or a misogynist or a homophobe without acknowledging their bigotry?
Or is it differreent because they've empowerfulized you sooo much?!

I'm going to try to focus more on trans* issues, rather than cis* feminists' issues with trans*folk. I've actually made it so that I cannot read mAndrea's blog anymore. No really, I have a firefox add-on, leechblock, that lets you block certain sites. I've blocked mAndea's 24/7/365 and made it impossible to change the options. Her site is just inane and soul-crushing, her posts don't even make sense (illogical I might call them). It's like reading any other complete bigot; much of it is just plain wrong, but there are part that are just so horrible I lose all hope for humanity (trans*women want to be raped--she and KA are feminists?).
I hope more folks focus on the real issues instead of apologizing for cissexism or ignoring trans* issues entirely.

I actually have a set of posts planned, I have to finish reading Transgender History, on either/both trans* history and trans* (s)heroes and allies (possibly Sylvia Rivera, Reed Erikson, Magnus Hirschfeld, etc). I also have a post on monsters and monstrous beings/creatures (which is sorta related to being trans*--we are perceived/made to be inhuman monsters), but I either have to get the courage to post the current and very personal version or edit it.
I haven't posted much for a mixture of personal issues, busyness, and depression.
Currently, it looks like I'll be able to go to Camp Trans and I want to do a post about my experience there and another on trans* community(s).
*((((({insert} [more] {{{parenthesis}}} [here]))))))*

I want to write on growing up trans*. On navigating this cissexist world. I want to have the energy to look at my own internalized cissexism. I want to go over and add/edit my definitions post. I want to look at the REAL ID act and discuss how thats going to fuck us over; maybe help find loopholes or just tell other trans*folk what they are. I want to write a post about the intersections of my trans* and my queer identities, without worrying that someone is going to think that they are somehow the same or stemming from the other.
I can't do this when I focus on the hate of those who should be allies. I can't get up the energy when I'm so bogged down in feminist/progressive/liberal cissexism.
I want to do some posts/linkfarms on racism, ableism, sex worker's rights advocacy, etc. Maybe even try my hand at writing something from an ally's perspective or trying to look at the intersections a bit.
I doubt I'll ignore the topic completely, but I'm going to try to focus my trans* posts on actual trans* issues instead of someone else's castle in the clouds.

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To All the Real Christians

I have no memory of where I got this picture (I'd give credit if I could), but I named it "christbeatendefendingqueer"--that would be "christ beaten defending queer"--when I saved it.
My mind went directly to this picture when I read this story.

A young trans*woman was attacked by four teens: Tyreek Childs, 17; Trevaugn Payne, 16; Shara Mozie, 17, and a 15-year-old whose name was not released because of his age.
This isn't all that uncommon, unfortunately.
What is uncommon is that the priest who runs the shelter the woman lives in came out, along with other residents, and drove the boys away. And then when the guys came back with their metal pipes and paint cans, Father Braxton tried to reason with them, tried to get them to leave.
He was beaten for his care, of course. So were two of the residents who came to his rescue.
Luckily, Tyreek, Trevaugn, Shara, and the unnamed were picked up by police and are looking at actual charges.

This is what real Christians would do, protect the week and the oppressed.
Don't believe me? Read the fucking gospels.
I am not a Christian, but my parents are and so I went to bible school and read the bible. Back in middle and high school I went through and read a fair amount of it.

When the priests come to Jesus and try to trick him, they ask him what the most important commandment is.
His answer? Love God and love your neighbor as you love me.
Your 'neighbor' is anyone and everyone; no matter their creed or nationality or any other distinction.
Folks like:
Fred Phelps, Exodus International, George W. Bush, The Catholic Church (the organization, not all catholics), and these boys?
Not acting like Christians.

I don't care what your beliefs are.
But when you use your beliefs as an excuse to attack, murder, and rape people...
When you use those beliefs as an excuse to make it near impossible for us to get legal jobs, to find housing, to go to school, to get medical attention...
Then I do care. I care because you right to believe has interfered with others' right to live.
Making it impossible for us to live as ourselves, instead of some script we were slapped on the ass with, is just as bad in my opinion.
Maybe its just me, but I'd rather risk murder and assault because I'm living as myself than live trapped as someone else.

My first boyfriend was a real Christian. At the time, I admit I was very bitter towards Christians and Christianity and he helped me get over it.
He, I'll call him J, believed in Christ's most important commandment. He believed deeply that that commandment was the main way of being Christian and that all that other stuff--going to church to who you fucked--was not nearly as important.
Showing, no being, Christ's love for your fellows is how to be a Christian.
I dated J in the early part of my sophomore year of high school, right before I came out to myself (I'll talk about that in another post). He graduated at the end of that year and we lost touch of each other. So I have no idea what he'd think of me now, or what he'd think of my transition. Or that he's dated another guy. But I think he'd be happy that I'm finally coming into myself; that I'm not hiding and pretending like I used to.

I'm not a Christian, but I like Christ. I like his lessons and I think he was often right (not so much his followers). I hope any Christians reading this, who don't already know Christ's most important commandment, will take heed and follow it.
Or at least, think of it.
Think of His words when you call something gay or retarded instead of irritating. Think on them when you choose to hire a white/cissexual/male/hetero/etc person instead of an equally or more competent POC/trans*/female/queer/etc person. Remember His words when you ignore, or join in, the teasing of a queer/trans*/disabled/POC/etc.
When you come across a situation where someone is being hurt, think on what Christ would do.
Would he join in? Would he ignore it? Or would he put a stop to it? Or, would he help the person afterwards, whether giving a kind word or buying them lunch?
Even if you're not a Christian, think on what is the right action.


PS: Don't read the comments on the NYdaily website. Just don't.

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Triggers

In the same vein as my last post...
Apparently it is fine to beat trans*folk when they refuse to be considered less than human. Yep, if that uppity tranny won't bow it's head and kiss your police boots when you call it faggot and heshe you can just beat it and spray mace in it's face. The worst that'll happen is you'll lose your job (only if you were already on probation though).
Just ask Ms. Johnson, she can tell you all about it. Oh yeah, after she was beaten and maced she was handcuffed and left in pain on the floor as a nurse completely ignores her. Funtimes ya'll.

While she was arrested on charges of prostitution, who knows if that's true, and that still doesn't make it all right.
No one deserves to be treated like that.
Moreover, trans*women can be arrested for prostitution for walking down the street or going to a party. Hellfires, they can be arrested or threatened with arrest for prostitution because they went 2 miles over the speed limit. I've talked about police brutality before, but it's still happening and it's still not known about.

"Women of color, and particularly transgender women of color, are often perceived by police through racialized and gendered stereotypes framing us as highly sexualized and sexually available. Law enforcement officers’ internalization and perpetuation of these stereotypes, combined with the high degree of discretion afforded by vague “quality of life” regulations, results in police profiling women of color, and particularly transgender women of color, as sex workers,and selective targeting of women of color for harassment, detention, and arrest." (from INCITE!)

"A Native American transgender woman reported that two Los Angeles police officers handcuffed her and took her to an alleyway. One officer reportedly hit her across the face, saying "you f---ing whore, you f---ing faggot," then threw her down on the back of the patrol car, ripped off her miniskirt and her underwear and raped her, holding her down and grabbing her hair. The second officer is also alleged to have raped her. According to the woman, they threw her on the ground and said, "That's what you deserve," and left her there." (from Amnesty International)

"One officer got in my face with the most vile insults I could imagine, his buddy stood nearby, night stick in hand ready to strike... The one officer, the leader was so vicious and abusive even his one ally seemed distressed at the mindless aggression and hate he spewed forth. I thought I was going to be killed right in front of welfare. With every push, or stab of his billy club, I thought I would die." (from Amnesty International)

There is a gorram reason why many trans*folk and brown folk and current/former prostitutes and/or prostituted folks don't trust police.
And don't fucking say that 99.999% of police are good cops and it's a just a few bad apples. That may be true if you're white, not obviously poor, not obviously LGBT, etc., but for the rest of the population...
Oh yeah, don't say a word if your relatives are cops; I know about the card you guys get (my friend's dad was a cop) that protects you from most minor offenses. Hell, when we were stupid and trespassed (and were caught) that card was the only reason they didn't call our parents or charge us with anything.


And folks can call or write to the Shelby County District Attorney’s Office at 201 Poplar Avenue, Third Floor, Memphis, Tennessee 38103, (phone)901.545.5900. Or Police Director Larry A. Godwin Memphis Police Services 201 Poplar Ave, 12th Floor Memphis, TN 38103 mpd@memphispolice.org. Or Mayor Dr. Willie W. Herenton City Hall 125 N. Main St. Room 700 Memphis, TN 38103 (901)576.6007.


PS: I want to thank WMCTV for using the correct pronouns and not putting Ms. Johnson's old name in the article; I really appreciate that--unfortunately, too few people give us trans*folk that much respect.

ETA: Theres been an update, apparently the officer who beat Ms. Johnson has filed an assault charge against her. Yes, the person who beat her with handcuffs, who was swung at once or twice when she defended herself, has filed charges against her.
James Swain, one of the 'officers', was fired (he was already on probation--I wonder what for) and the other, Bridges McRae, is on desk duty pending an investigation. Yeah, this sounds like they're taking this reeal seriously.

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Something Rotten in the State of SC

Wanna know how much a gay man's life is worth?
Ask Sean Kennedy, oh wait, you can't because he was murdered.
But you can ask his murderer Stephen Moller--who, after killing him, left a message on one of Sean's friends voicemail bragging and laughing.
Wanna know why Moller killed Sean?
Because Sean's hand accidentally brushed Moller's face. That's right, he accidentally touched him when he reached past.

It's worth about ten months in jail.
"5 year suspended sentence to 3 years with 3 years probation after he gets out of jail. He will spend approx. 10 months in jail. After which he is then entitled to parole.If granted he will be on probation for 3 years. He was also sentenced to 30 days community service and ordered to take anger management classes. In addition he was ordered to have alcohol and drug counseling."

From Sean's Mom, Elke, statement after the sentencing:
"In fact, I believe that Sean's case has been mishandled from the beginning.
Getting the investigation started - we had to initiate the securing of evidence -sheriffs deputies did not take it serious.
Our Solicitors got a lot of pressure about the case, received weekly phone calls from our SC senators from Washington and from congress man Inglis himself.
Do any of you know of another local case that our Senators and congressman would be that interested in? I don't!"
Given that after this pressure from congress folks the solicitors offered a plea bargain I highly doubt that the senators were calling for tea and dumplings. No, far more likely they were hoping to avoid another Matthew Shepard 'incident'.
You know, despite Sean's mother's pleading, they didn't even try to get the recording of the voicemail played in court?
I think She needs to get some new lawyers and appeal this horrendous ruling.

This doesn't sound like 'just another drunken brawl':
"On May 16, 2007, at about 3:45 am, Sean was leaving a local bar in Greenville when a car pulled up beside him, a young man got out of the car, came around the car approached my son and called him faggot and then punched him so hard that it broke his face bones, he fell back and hit the asphalt. This resulted in his brain to be separated from his brain stem and ricochet in his head.
Sean never had a chance.
Sean’s killer got back into the car and left my son dying there.
A little later he left a message on one of the girl’s phone, who knew Sean saying: “You tell your faggot friend that when he wakes up he owes me $500 for my broken hand”."

This sounds more like, while Moller may not have intended to kill him, he did intend to hurt Sean for being gay. To hurt him because Sean accidentally touched Moller; to punish him because he made Moller uncomfortable.

"We forfeit three-fourths of ourselves in order to be like other people. -Sean Kennedy"

Here's a list of various official Greenville phone numbers.
What would happen if enough people called the City Attorney Office (864.467.4420), City Council Office (864.467.4431), the non-emergency police line (864.271.5333), the non-emergency sheriff's line (864.271.5210), or the Mayor's Office (864.467.4425)?

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What I've been looking at

NY State Assembly approved GENDA!!!! This means that, if the Senate passes it, you can't be discriminated against based on your gender identity or gender expression; so this also protects folks who aren't trans*, but still don't conform to gender/sex roles.
Barney Frank, John Averwhosis, and the rest of them can go fuck themselves for being cissexist. They should be focusing more on getting legislation like this passed instead of same-sex marriage (as important as that is); numbers don't lie.

More good news, it looks like Obama will win the nomination! Lately, I've mostly been following the nominations from Transgriot because while Monica supports Obama, she doesn't use sexist attacks against Hillary.
Monica's blog is awesome for more than just campiegn stuff, she's got other good news (KY reinstated protections for trans* state employees), posts about being a trans* woman of color (Trans* WOC are not ugly), as wells as other Important Stuff (the increase in homo- and transphobic hate crimes for instance).

In case you weren't aware, Brownfemipower is back and posting!

Female Desire Week is here again!

I'm thinking of getting a new binder, my old one doesn't work so well (especially in this heat); I'm thinking a white Double Front Compression Shirt.


Oh, and weird search terms: "hbs ftm prince" "monster cocks wants students at school" "i want to make my as a monster cock is it possible through surgery" (WTF??) "hentay monster attaking young doctor" (learn to spell; it's hentai and attacks) "ocd fear of being transgender"

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Hate Crimes Laws

This is why I support hate crimes legislation.
Because oftentimes, people don't kill minorities just because of a mugging or a disagreement or whatever.
No...they kill us so we can't stand up.
So we will kill ourselves for them.
So we will remember our place is under their boots.

Read my last few posts and the posts I've linked to.
What do they say?
Are you listening?

I gorram know it could happen to me (though it's less likely as I am white and on the ftm spectrum as opposed to the mtf spectrum), I work about an hours walk from my boyfriend's dorm and I usually get out of work at midnight. And only a few friends have cars and they can't always pick me up and I feel horrible for asking them all the time.
And no matter what I do I can't pass as straight.
People either misgender me as a butch lesbian or they see me as a young queer boy.

Every murder--from Gwen to Simmie to Brandon to Lawrence--reminds me that I or any one of us could be next.
And I don't feel this way about muggings or car accidents or even hold ups.
Every one of those murders was a hate crime--a clear message that I am not a person and they will do whatever it fucking takes to make me and those like me remember that.

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Too fucking easy.

Tradgedies galore.
Here's an article by a LJ friend of mine on how fucking easy it is to kill trans*folk. There's also an article about a ten-year old's suicide because this male-assigned kid wanted to be a girl.


How To Kill a Transperson

By Ceridwen Troy
This article was written on Friday, Feb. 15, 2008.

On Saturday, Sanesha Stewart, a transwoman of color living in the Bronx, was murdered in her own apartment. She was 25 years old. Her accused killer, Steve McMillan, had known her for months, yet when he was arrested, he claimed to have been enraged to find out that she was what the media coverage called not really a woman. He stabbed her over and over again in the chest and throat. She tried to fight him off; there were defensive wounds found on her hands.

On Tuesday, eighth-grader Lawrence King was in a classroom in Oxnard, Calif. He was openly gay, and often came to school in gender-bending clothing, makeup, jewelry and shoes. According to another student, it was freaking the guys out. One of them shot Lawrence in the head. He was declared brain-dead on Wednesday.

It is easy to look at cases like this and think, how tragic. How random. How senseless.

But then, you forget how easy it is to kill a transgender person.

You forget that all across this nation, faith leaders of all stripes, men and women who claim to speak for God Himself, call us sinners, call us abominations, call us evil.

You forget that at best the media depicts us as something to be pitied, something that our families must be strong and overcome. At worst, they depict us as abnormal, exploiting our bodies for ratings, exploiting the publics fear of us for shock value.

You forget that on a good day, law enforcement agents are neglectful of us, and that far more frequently they join in our harassment. You forget the transwomen of color who are rounded up on suspicions of prostitution. You forget the beatings that go uninvestigated. You forget the molestation and rape we face when we are arrested.

You forget the medical establishment that drains our wallets for the therapy and hormones and surgeries they tell us we need. You forget the way we are then refused treatment when we are dying, dying of treatable diseases, dying of easily patched wounds.

You forget that, by the law of the land, it is legal in the majority of states to deny us employment, to deny us service, to deny us housing.

You forget the shelters and the rape crisis centers that will not allow us through their doors.

You forget that many of us do not even have family to turn to when we are at our most desperate.

You forget that the leaders of our own community have told us that it is not time for us to have rights, that it is not pragmatic for us to be considered worthy of the same respect as other human beings.

You forget that in our own circles, it is considered a negative thing to be too flamboyant. You forget the way our pride parades have been derided by our own community. You forget the scorn heaped upon drag queens by other gay men. You forget the fear to be seen in public with a friend who is considered too open, too queer.

You forget the way it seeps into the minds of transgender people, too. You forget the way a transsexual will shout that she is not a crossdresser, as if there were something wrong with that. You forget the catty names we call each other if we don’t pass”

You forget how many of us take our own lives every year.

You forget because the noise is always there, a constant drone in the background. Every newspaper piece that calls a transwoman he instead of she. Every talk show host who spends an hour talking about our genitals. Every childish taunt about looking like a tranny. Every transperson who talks about themselves as true transsexuals. Every activist and politician who tells us now is not the time.

You forget too, how easy it is to kill a person of color, with myths about gangstas and lies about immigrants. You forget how easy it is to kill a person living in poverty, cutting off her welfare because she is suuposedly being paid to breed. You forget how easy it is to kill a sex worker, with sex-shaming language, slinging about slurs like hooker and whore.

You forget the message hidden inside every single one of those statements.

You are less than I am. You are not worthy of the rights and respect that I am worthy of.

You are not human.

It is very easy to kill something that you do not see as human.

It is very easy to kill a transperson.


Gender torment of 10-year-old Cameron

(I'll use nongender pronouns for Cameron)
This poor kid, hir poor family... no one should have to bury their child.
And hir mom sounds far more supportive than many parents; she bought hir girls knickers and was their for hir and had only refused to buy hir make-up because sie was only ten.
I hate this society. I hate that a kid can feel so alone, so hopeless, that sie would kill themselves because they are or may be trans*.

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