Die or D.I.Y.?: Absurd Records

Showing posts with label Absurd Records. Show all posts

Friday, 4 March 2022

Gerry And The Holograms – "The Lost 1979 L.P. By Mancunian D.I.Y Sarcastic Synth-Pop Anonimites" (Finders Keepers Records – Cache018LP ) 2017/1979

Blimey, just when you thought the well was dry, up pops a lost album by Absurd records' Situationist-indebted masked art-eynth studio duo from Manchester,England...Gerry and the Holograms!

Yes the very same Gerry and the Hollograms who released a conceptual and unplayable anti-record in that nutty situationist art tradition so beloved of Malcolm Maclaren. Each record came glued into its picture sleeve, rendering the disc completely unplayable ,called, if i'm not mistaken "The Emperor's New Clothes" .Oh,those wacky but anonymous Krazy Kats.

Q: How many Situationists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: If 'changing a light bulb' is already in everyone's head, why do it at all?

Like The Residents, the veil of secrecy has now been stripped away, revealing Gerry to be none other than that bloke and resting actor,C.P.Lee from satirical rock band Albertos Y Lost Trios Paranoias;and ,it says here,electronica excursionist John Scott...yeah... THAT, John Scott?!

More Residents references were abound on their only ,playable, release on the great Absurd Records,in 1979, "Meet The Dissidents"......Meet The Residents?....Geddit?

Of course CP Lee made a career out of making subtly satirical piss takes of many genres that were easily confused with the actual targets of their biting wit. like the "Snuff Rock" EP which was punkier than most of the 'real' punks,and had a track covered by the Damned no less("Kill"); Another song of note is their Status Quo pastiche,"Heads Down No Nonsense Mindless Boogie", a fine tune.

It's basically a tongue in cheek version of the synth-duo's/groups that were gaining popularity in 1979,and without knowing what we know, this stuff could easily have scraped the bottom end of the charts had they been on Virgin,and not Absurd Records.

The unplayable single makes its debut appearance on track 8 as two minutes of silence...so don't think your media player is fucked 'cus its only dem zany situationists innit,reaping havoc with your reality.

Q: No,Really, how many Situationists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Zero. They all have day jobs, or classes, are at the café, or are expelling each other - and find lights inauthentic.

Tracklist:

1.Gerry And The Holograms
2.Tubular Belles
3.Curiosity Killed The Gath
4.Fake Moon
5.The Forty Three
6.Increased Resistance
7.Jeep
8.The Emperor's New Music
9.Just Desserts
10.Space Invaders
11.Gerry And The Holograms (Alternative 1979 Drumbox Version)

DOWNLOAD the hollow world of gerry exposed HERE!

Sunday, 3 August 2014

Blah Blah Blah ‎– "Blah Blah Blah (2)" (Blah Records ‎– B.L.P.2) 1982

Christ! Here's Blah Blah Blah's second compilation (also called er....Blah Blah Blah??) of their bedroom noodlings. This is gonna be shit?.....Wait.....No.....I'm enjoying it. Something's different from the 'reviewing the first LP times'?

I'm now thinking sixth form college drop-out Residents!

Yup.....thats right....i'm drunk.

Like ecstasy and acid house, speed and punk rock, LSD and Psychedelia; you need to be drunk to enjoy Blah Blah Blah. Its kinda like the scale of ugliness for sexual partners scale; how many beers is he or she before you wanna 'Do it' with them? Well, Blah Blah Blah's second LP is three cans of (Lidl) strong continental lager on an empty stomach.

Is this really good? I'm gonna have three more cans and ascertain afterwards. The likelihood is that after six beers, I couldn't give a shit. I'd probably write a rave review of Dire Straits at the six beer mark.

I will,however, as I am under the influence, admit to illegally downloading Dire Straits first album, and really enjoying it. They were 'Pub Rock' after all, and I love Pub rock. I was probably drunk!?

Fuck it! I'm determined to do a Pub Rock Month, but I won't be including Dire Straits.

I think i'll crack open another can and play Blah Blah Blah's first album again?.....Nah!

Dire Straits it is!?

Tracklist:

A1	Woo You (Dec 81)
A2	Old Age Customs (Dec 81)
A3	Durables (Feb 82)
A4	The Hotel
A5	Tropical Holiday Time (May 80)
A6	Travelling On The Road Again
A7	Think Things Of You
B8	Nothing (Dec 81)
B9	Very Nice (Oct 78)
B10	The Feet Meet (Nov 80)
B11	Heart Attack (April 81)
B12	I Just Don't Know (Oct 81)
B13	Burn (Nov 81)
B14	Rum Rhumba (Feb 82)

DOWNLOAD blah blah blah blah blah blah2 HERE!

Saturday, 2 August 2014

Blah Blah Blah ‎– "Blah Blah Blah" ( Trans Universal Records ‎– TU1) 1981

Blah Blah Blah, the genius's that created the “In The Army”(mp3) single on Absurd records. Even the B-side was rather marvellous, the Imperious “Why Diddle?”. If only they had an album of this earth moving greatness?......well they did.....an eponymously titled collection from 1981.....but, nothing earth moving about this collection of farting about in the bedroom nonsense. Maybe bowel moving is more appropriate for this rather annoyingly unfunny mess.

'Music from Essex', it said on their absurd single,but no Essex accents can be heard here, as I suspected. Definitely Manc's.

Its a collection of stream of consciousness incompetence by bored twenty-somethings inspired by the 'anyone can do it' ethos of the age. Not the best advert for a noble philosophy, and this comes from a Danny and the Dressmakers fan.

Blah Blah Blah,are a great control experiment for the Picasso school of learning to paint like an adult before you can paint like a child. I suspect Danny and the Dressmakers could play their instruments to a reasonably high standard before they unlearnt everything they know to be 'correct',and made '200 Cancellations' Can't say I suspect the same for Blah Blah blah.(DATD were funny too......sort of an essential property?)

If you're into silly, aimless, DIY improv, then this is for you. If not, get the magnificent Blah Blah Blah single, “In The Army”. One Flop Wonders.

Tracklist:

A1	My Mother Was A Radiator
A2	Disney On Ice
A3	Long John
A4	The Red Spot
A5	Going Down To Soho
A6	So Sore
A7	The Four Corners Of The World
A8	Interference
B1	Itching In My Pants
B2	Natives Are Restless
B3	Weasel Hunting
B4	Liquidizing Chickens
B5	Outside The Veg. Shop
B6	Socialist Democrats
B7	Wayo Wayo

DOWNLOAD blah blah blah etc etc etc HERE!

Friday, 14 March 2014

Various Artists - "The Instant Absurd Records Collection 1979 - 1980"

ABSURD 1 - Blah Blah Blah - "In The Army" / "Why Diddle?" 1979

There are few records when you remember where you were when you first hear them, and for me this is one of them.
I was in bed in a room in the Angel Hotel in Whitby Yorkshire,aged 15 listening to the John Peel Show. when Peel played this, my impressionable 15 year old ears stood attentively and absorbed the madness eagerly.This record is still guaranteed to create some kind of reaction in the listener, and that is the definition of great art;Full Stop!...yes i know i put a semi-colon.(ps Thats "Period"! for our American readers out there).

Whitby is famous for featuring in Bram Stokers Dracula novel, which has nothing to do with this tune, but just to emphasise that this music has absolutely nothing in common with the awful "Dracula-fest" gothic metal festival that occurs in this town of a winter.

"We got guns down our socks,in our underpants..........we got guns in our toilets,guns in our cars.
We got bombs underneath the Stereo.......and we're coming to bash you in!"."

"We got Bombs underneath the stereo and we're coming to bash you in!", what a line! Obviously improvised in a first take, 'cus you just couldn't write stuff like that.

"Why Diddle?" is even insaner,but is lessened by its lack of shock value. A throbbing Electro-concrete improv piece, that deserves recognition amongst electronic music students everywhere.

ABSURD 2 - Eddie Fiction - "U.F.O. part2" / "U.F.O. part1" 1979

Northern comedy set to a minimal electronic backing is not normally my cup of beef dripping. But this strangely amuses, as it parodies yer average Mancunian on an alien world,and the moronic stuff they would miss, like the Telly, chips, darts, and,of course, the Pub. And don't forget U.F.O. does NOT stand for Unidentified Flying Object in this tune; its a double entendre alluding to a popular expletive suggesting that one leaves the area immediately.
(Sorry everyone I haven't got the b-side, but according to the etching on the vinyl,it hasn't got a b-side!...so you won't miss anything!)

ABSURD 3 - The 48 Chairs - " Snap it Around " / "Psycle Sluts " 1979

48 Chairs, who are these people?...This is a jolly tune, I can see Nick Kershaw dancing to this, or maybe Pepsi and Shirley. In fact I think I wanna dance to it too........er....maybe not.
The B-side is an instrumental version of the John Cooper Clarke poem by the same name. An instrumental version of a word poem has got to be a first. Clarke even has a writing credit!
Those mancunians are crazy!

ABSURD 4 - Gerry and the Holograms - " Meet the Dissidents" 1979

I have a feeling that all of the releases on Absurd, were made in one afternoon by the same people.
Again,its a minimalist electronic affair, without drums,electronic or acoustic, and some funny sounding vocals. Having said that, this is a good thing, for its not what you put in its ,what you leave out.......like Gerry and the Holograms' obvious influence, namely The residents.
Alas,this is still one of the superior Absurd singles.

Track Listing:

A		Gerry And The Holograms
B		Increased Resistance

ABSURD 5 - Gerry and the Holograms - "The Emporers New Music" 1979

Pranksters,practical jokers, conceptual art,whatever you wanna call it; Gerry and the Holograms second single was.......A conceptual and unplayable record.
Each record was pasted with glue to the inside of the picture sleeve. Two variations of the sleeve exist: with or without the Rough Trade logo. In 1980 a few copies came in a third sleeve variation which was credited to "The Charlie Parkas". Absurd Records label boss (Lawrence Beedle) in quoted as saying "It took the best part of a week to paint and glue them into the bags". The numbers made are unknown but around 500 is the most likely number.
The music itself does not actually exist - rather the records were actually unsold singles from Rabid Records' catalog but with a paste-on Gerry & The Holograms label on one side to fool the buyer that the record actually exists.
What I want to know is,did anyone buy this?

Track Listing

A		Untitled
B		Untitled

ABSURD 6 - The Mothmen - "Does it matter Irene?" /"Please Let Go" 1979

The Mothmen were one of the few Absurd artists who went on to something of a career. They appeared on On-U Sound with an LP!....obviously due to the dub/reggae element that they had lurking in their music. And a series of singles and e.p.s on Do it Records, before disappearing in the mid eighties.
This single is sort of a Psychedelic pop meets Dub inside a senile old drunkard females brain. Is quite good in fact.
But,to these ears, the b-side is better. Another falling down classic of stoned sounding free-pop.Include's a section where an almost free-jazz style syncopation enters through the side door of the mental Hospital. Where all normal time signatures fear to tread; this is musical sophistication of the highest commendation. To the untuned ear it sounds like a total mess, but that ear is in a wrong place.Tune your ears please,and train the brain.

Guitar – David Rowbotham Guitar, Bass, Keyboards, Vocals – Bob Harding, Tony Bowers

ABSURD 7 - Cairo - "I Like Bluebeat." / "Version" 1979

Was this a cynical attempt to cash in the Two Tone phenomenon? Its a bluebeat style tune, with a hint of nightboat to cairo era Madness ; is this where they lifted the band name?...er...yes.
I can't stand ska(I hate the irritating you're gonna have fun vibe to it, the forced jollity of it all), and i don't like this,and especially since there's one of those irritating versions on the reverse side......version meaning an instrumental version of the a-side,but with effects added,and the odd tape of gun fire etc. But someone out there might like it.
NO!...I don't like Blue beat.

ABSURD 8 - Naafi Sandwich - "Slice 1 / Slice 2 " 1979

Now this is more like it, two slices of barely logical dementia from the appallingly named Naafi Sandwich.But any group with someone called Sir Freddie Viaduct in it has to be half good.

They also released several cassettes,one of which is included in the download called "Run 1".
'Experimental' is an adequate adjective for this group(?)

Naafi Sandwich – Rum 1 (Cassette 1980):

Muva Dubba
Uranium Geranium
Hoochie Pooch
Yum Yum
Lee Street Bounce

Personnel:
Sir Freddie Viaduct, vocals, bass, guitar, trumpet) and Brenda Kenny (a.k.a. Poly Rhythm, vocals, percussion, drums, keyboards)

ABSURD 10 - Bet Lynch's Legs - " The Good,The Bad, and the Indifferent " 1979

To the citizens of the planet who live outside of the UK, Bet Lynch was a character in a television soap with a predeliction for fake animal skin coats and peroxide blonde hair.We very rarely saw her legs because they were always behind the bar of the local pub; she was the bar maid.

Now that slice of UK cultural history over with, we can turn our attention to the group,which contained one of the Smirks,and John Scott from the 48 Chairs. They had a minor hit with the next single.
This record is basically a home made version of "Ghost Riders In The Sky", complete with home organ rhythm box, and "good,The Bad and The Ugly" impressions in the background. Were they drunk when they made this?
The B-side is more of the same, sort of a Joe Meek meets elevator music in some obvious tongue in cheek lounge moment, in a pub full of Ennio Morricone nuts whistling along, clinking beer mugs together, with plenty of man love going on.

Track Listing:

A		Riders In The Sky
B		High Noon

ABSURD 11 - Bet Lynch's Legs - "Some Like it Hot / Some Don't " 1980

The Follow up single, which was the minor hit!
Its like the other single never finished, this is "The Good,The Bad and the Indifferent" parts three and four!
"Some like it Hot" is an underwater version of ennio morricone's theme to 'The Good,The bad,and the Ugly', very pointless, but maybe that's the point.
"Some Don't" is a further underwater version of the same track; even more pointless. Maybe it's a parable about the meaninglessness of existence? Or maybe its just a pile of shite? I'll leave that up to you.

Track Listing:

A		Some Like It Hot
B		Some Don't

ABSURD 15 - Cairo - " Movie Stars " / " Cuthberts Birthday Treat " 1980

More annoying trend following ska from Cairo, backed by the even worse musical genre, Ragtime Pastische......awful.
This was the final nail in the Absurd coffin,shortly afterwards the label went tits up. But what did you expect for a totally non-commercial enterprise such as this? It started with some timelessly great singles,then petered out into some kind of unfunny genre satire loungecore pointlessness.
But the concept was good,and the artwork was great.

DOWNLOAD THE INSTANT ABSURD RECORDS COLLECTION HERE!