Do something new... and pamper

Welcome to the second of my seven blog posts for UK Dementia Awareness Week 2015.

This year's Dementia Awareness Week centres around the theme of doing something new for people with dementia, under the mantra that ‘Life doesn’t have to end when dementia begins’. For many people living with dementia in care homes, however, a lack of opportunities to have meaningful occupation and activity, or even just enjoy the simple pleasures that many of us take for granted, can lead to life feeling like it really has ended.

Over this Dementia Awareness Week (DAW2015) I want to look at some of the positive things relatives and staff can do to enhance the lived experience of people with dementia in care homes. They may be new things, or they may be old favourites, but they all share in the ability to turn a boring day into something a little bit more special.

Day 2: Pampering

Personal care is often a very task-orientated activity that only allows for the bare essentials of washing, dressing and being helped to the toilet. When time allows, care staff are expected to ensure that fingernails are cut and that people who want to see the hairdresser, barber or chiropodist are enabled to, but often that is as far as ‘pampering’ goes.

There is so much more that we can do to make people feel special, however. Small touches like a favourite scent in the bath, a hand or foot massage, painting nails or applying make-up for ladies who like that look, giving ladies who’ve had their hair washed a lovely blow dry (including putting a few rollers in for those who would enjoy that) or ensuring gentlemen have their facial hair shaved or trimmed the way they like it can all make a difference to how a person feels.

Many of these actions do ask for a time commitment, particularly if you’re going to make them luxurious experiences, but that one-to-one time is often vital for people living with dementia in a care home, and there is absolutely no reason why relatives can’t get involved in these activities too – I spent many hours doing my dad’s nails, cutting his hair and giving him a shave or a hand massage. Never underestimate the simple happiness and the huge bonding potential of making someone feel just a little bit more special than they did the day before.

Also, remember that pampering can go beyond making the body feel nice and extend to choices of clothing and accessories. The same drab outfits day after day (that are probably wearing away due to extensive high-temperature washing and drying) are likely to dampen anyone’s mood. Why not treat your loved one to a shopping trip, either by going out to the shops or via online or catalogue shopping, or even just jazz up tired outfits with new accessories. If you have the knowledge to turn yourself into a seamstress, you might even be able to remodel hardly-worn outfits, breathing new life into them. Even small details like different buttons, a fabric corsage (no pins!) or some sparkly trimmings can make a big difference to how the person wearing the clothing feels about their appearance. 

More information, tips and advice on pampering can be found in the following D4Dementia blog posts:

Little touches that make a BIG difference: http://d4dementia.blogspot.co.uk/2012/06/little-touches-that-make-big-difference.html

Humanity in care - The role of touch: http://d4dementia.blogspot.co.uk/2014/10/humanity-in-care-role-of-touch.html

A helping hand: http://d4dementia.blogspot.co.uk/2014/11/a-helping-hand.html

Next post on 19 May 2015.
Until then...

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A helping hand

When a loved one is living with dementia, it is inevitable that a time will come when they will need additional help and support. A person with dementia may be very resistant to any intervention from any individual, and who could blame them - 'help', however well-meaning, often results in taking over from the person with dementia and can be very disempowering, especially for a previously very independent person. Alternatively your loved one may be willing to accept help, but only want it from a particular person, which can put a huge strain on one individual.

Overcoming problems around how to provide help and support, and especially difficulties completing essential tasks like washing, dressing, eating etc, is something that huge numbers of family carers struggle with, and can even baffle professional care workers. If time is short, and the individual living with dementia is determined that what the person who is supporting them feels needs to happen isn't going to happen, it can become a very frustrating battleground for everyone.

Alleviating those tensions can be difficult. As one family carer said to me after reading my 'Troubleshooting Checklist' blog post: "How do you cope when someone is unwilling or unable to cooperate with these tasks? Our routine gets harder every day." The advice I gave that person is the inspiration behind this blog post, largely because I know from the correspondence and conversations I have had that that person is far from alone in experiencing these problems.

There are lots of things you can do to try and improve the communication and mutual understanding needed to avoid battleground situations over every day necessities. Lots of carers – be they family carers or professional care workers - often get locked into a very task-based day, and naturally take over doing tasks even when the person with dementia may be able to do some or all of these things themselves. I was guilty of this with my dad in the early years of his dementia - it is an incredibly easy pattern to fall into.

Often it's just quicker and easier to do things for a person than support them to be independent. However, for anyone, and particularly a very independent person, this could be like red-rag to a bull. Put yourself in the shoes of the person with dementia - looking at it from their perspective it seems very controlling and disempowering for you to just take over. 

Maintaining skills is a difficult balancing act. If a person is going to put themselves in danger or do something wholly inappropriate then some measure of intervention will be needed. Judging that measure, however, can only come from understanding the individual - through communication, body language, previous history, observation etc - anything that tells you what their capabilities are and where the points are that you may need to intervene. 

Of course dementia is a constantly changing landscape, and abilities and the motivation to do things will fluctuate and most likely decline over months and years. The frustration the person with dementia is likely to be feeling during this decline cannot be overestimated, and any intervention you make needs to be very sensitively handled. There may be specific trigger points when you and the person you are supporting upset each other. It might be helpful for you to note these and see if a pattern emerges.

Once you've worked out what is triggering times of discord, you may be able to identify factors that you can change. For example, the environment you are in may be contributing to difficulties. A particular room, object, or sensory experience could be a problem. The routine you are using may also be problematic, even if it's a routine that has been in place for a long time. Or the problems may be down to a breakdown in communication.

An example to illustrate this:

You are helping a loved one to dress. Your loved one has always got dressed in the bathroom after their morning wash. Your loved one is now resistant to dressing but is struggling to communicate why in a way that you can understand. Examples of possible problems include:

1)    Looking at the bath/shower, your loved one is associating the bathroom with getting undressed for washing – they simply cannot understand why you would want them to put clothes on, rather than take them off.

2)    Your loved one doesn't recall having a wash so cannot understand why clothes should be going back on.

3)    Your loved one opened their bowels prior to having their wash, there is a lingering smell and they don't want to dress because the smell is suggesting to them that they need to wash.

4)    They haven’t completed their pre-dressing regime in the way that they would want to – IE: don’t feel dry enough, want to apply a body lotion, or would like to do their hair or make up before getting dressed.

5)    In your small bathroom there isn't enough room for you and your loved one to manoeuvre to help them get dressed, this is making the space claustrophobic, possibly too hot, and you are getting in each other's way, causing mutual frustration.

All of the problems described above are centred around association and memory. The environment you are in is causing a negative association. Try changing the established routine and moving to another room to dress – ensuring that room is warm enough. The bedroom, with an open wardrobe and different outfits to choose may help to demonstrate that it's time to get dressed.

 

Of course the above is just one example – I could write up many, many more – every individual situation is going to be slightly different and require a different approach. However, a general checklist for multiple situations would include (in no particular order):

1)    Think about the room(s) where you are trying to help the person (do they feel safe/comfortable?).

2)    Don't ignore sensory barriers - noise can cause confusion, smells and the visual landscape can give mixed messages.

3)    Experiment with routine if the current one is not working.

4)    Be mindful of timing - the time you chose to do something may not be the time that the person you are supporting wants to do it. If schedule is vitally important, try to agree the schedule together and have a dementia friendly clock to help orientate the person and avoid conflict over what time it is.

5)    How much are you involving the person in tasks - would they like to/could they do more? Or would they like something done differently?

6)    Think about how you are communicating - is it appropriate, can it be understood, do you need to change how you are communicating?

7)    Use clear clues to indicate what the person needs to be concentrating on - IE: open the wardrobe to choose clothes to wear, set the table before a meal, take towels and washing products to the bathroom in readiness for a bath/shower, collect up coats, hats and shoes ready to go out.

8)    Think about how you are helping the person, are there any particular trigger points for upset (observe/document and you may see a pattern emerge that you can change).

9)    If someone else is available to help (another family member, friend, care worker etc), find out from the person with dementia what their preferences are. Also consider if you need extra help in certain situations (help with moving and handing etc), and if certain tasks should be completed by someone else while you take a back seat. Be particularly mindful of cross-gender issues, dignity and privacy.

10) Remember that what needs to be done (like getting dressed) doesn't exist in isolation from other things. For example, feeling unwell, being in pain etc are going to have a huge bearing on how someone concentrates on what needs to be done, their willingness to help, and the movement and mobility they have. A person with dementia may not be able to articulate how other illnesses or pain are affecting them, so as a carer you need to be a bit of a detective.

Taking the person-centred, holistic approach described above should help to alleviate most issues around offering help and support to a person with dementia, but like everything in dementia care there are no guarantees and the role of a carer is likely to be constant trial and error. As ever, patience and empathy are vital. I'm not sure it ever gets easier, but what I can say is that with time you become more perceptive and an infinitely more effective detective.

 

Until next time...

You can follow me on Twitter: @bethyb1886

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Humanity in care - The role of touch

One of the most controversial elements of care provision is touch. It has a discomfort associated with it for many professionals, and even family members can have deep reservations about touch. It can be associated with abuse, both by ignoring someone's need for a comforting touch or the more commonly made association of inappropriate touch. It is also a topic that us famously reserved Brits don't really like talking about.

Touching another person can happen in a variety of situations and for a multitude of different purposes. It can be the basic things, like a clasp of the hand when you greet someone, a hug, a kiss on the cheek, ruffling hair or brushing against an arm. It can be touch that is necessary to help a person with something, like personal care or eating and drinking. Touch can be used to support, comfort or reassure, but it can also cause alarm or anxiety.

Touch has an important role to play in dementia care for the majority of people who are living with dementia. Understanding the individual preferences of a person around touch is vital to ensure that you don't dismiss a person who seeks comfort, or distress a person who feels that touching them is an invasion of their personal space.

Against this backdrop, why do we have such a deeply uneasy relationship with touch, given that it is a natural part of life from the moment we are born?

For professionals, a lot of the issues around touch are about what is appropriate - there is an underlying fear that any intervention must be proportional for a particular situation and justifiable to anyone who may observe and question. Yes, touch is sometimes associated with inappropriate behaviour and criminal acts, but those incidents are few in comparison to the vast majority of instances where touch is giving support, comfort and putting humanity into care.

Occasionally, issues around touch can be rooted in fear about older people and advanced dementia. A good example comes from a particular interaction between my dad and an out-of-hours doctor. It was late on a Saturday evening when the doctor called to see my dad for a suspected chest infection. During the necessary examination, the doctor refused to touch my dad, instead issuing instructions to remove clothing and position dad in a certain way. I was appalled - the lack of warmth in that doctor's approach betrayed everything that was wrong with his bedside manner.

Fear of touch can also come from concerns about protocols. I remember seeing care workers walking past and ignoring a lady who was crying out to see her husband. When I asked why they were not comforting her, they said they weren't allowed to. I was horrified and couldn’t just walk on by, so I stopped and put my arm around the lady. We sat there for a while, she was crying, I was trying to be soothing. I can't prove my intervention helped, but I can say that if I had been that lady I would have felt considerably less alone as a result of a comforting touch.

Sitting holding my dad's hand was a standard element of all the hours we spent together, as was stroking his head or his arms. However, not all family members feel comfortable about touching their relatives in this way. Visiting a loved one with dementia can bring with it a raft of emotions, and as much as we don't like to talk about some of the more uncomfortable aspects, for some people this can include feelings of revulsion, of not wanting to become 'dirty' or 'catch' something. In short, not touching can be method of protection for some individuals.

At the other end of the scale are family carers, who find themselves thrown into an unfamiliar role that is inevitably going to involve a lot of touch. Having to cope with an increasing need from their loved one for help with personal care can be hugely difficult. Any care that involves touching intimate areas, such as changing incontinence pads or bathing, can be especially problematic, and even more so when the relationship is between a child and a parent, and where the two people involved are of the opposite sex.

So how do we become more comfortable about touch, and the vital role it plays in caring for people with dementia? 

A significant part of the answer to this lies within ourselves. Confronting our own reservations about touch is the first step towards feeling more comfortable about it. Reservations in relation to touching people with dementia can often be rooted in stigma - one of the most astonishing things I ever heard was the idea that somehow you might 'catch' dementia from touching someone who is living with it. Perhaps that is what that out-of-hours doctor was afraid of.

As a family member visiting a relative who is living with dementia, engaging in practical activities that may naturally lead to an element of touch - in terms of guiding or assisting the person with dementia - can help to make touch feel like the normal part of life that it is. If you are a family carer having to undertake increasingly personal touch-related care, knowing that you are doing things in the right way (for example techniques for moving and handling, washing and dressing etc) can often help to reassure the carer. That guidance could come from a district nurse or other qualified health or social care professional.

For professionals, I think touch will inevitably remain a difficult area. Some people can naturally incorporate touch into their care provision, and so long as that is done in a way that the individual receiving care is comfortable with, then it is a win-win for all. Learning to gauge that comfort level takes a degree of skill and experience, and guidance from other members of the team.

Most importantly though, it is about communication with the person you are caring for and observation of their needs and reactions. It's about being adaptable, and not assuming that what was ok yesterday is ok today or tomorrow. It is also about establishing relationships through continuity of care and reflecting on what is going well and what could be done better. 

In the end, touch is a human reaction, and hugely associated with our emotions. It is part of who we are, and as such it has to be part of the care we provide.

Until next time...

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15-minutes of shame

As a light was shone, yet again, on the huge inadequacies within our home care services as the issue of 15-minute visits hit the headlines, I decided to time my morning routine. Just how much could I as an able-bodied thirty-something, fairly fit and known to be someone who is constantly on the go, get done in 15-minutes?

Well, the answer was that I couldn’t get out of bed, make a cup of tea, cut, toast and butter my breakfast bread, use the loo, have a wash and get dressed within my 15-minutes. Something had to give for me to make my target, in fact quite a lot had to give in the end, as I like a shower rather than a quick rub over with a damp flannel, I needed to blow-dry my hair, and we’d run out of butter for the toast, so I had to pop to the shop.

It will come as no surprise to my family that it took me more than 15-minutes to get ready for the day ahead, but I hope it provides a sobering thought for anyone who believes that 15-minutes is long enough to fulfil the care needs of an older or disabled person.

This may be a person who will take most of the 15-minutes just to be helped to get out of bed. They potentially then have to choose between having a hot drink, something to eat, visiting the loo or having their incontinence pad changed or catheter checked, having the sort of wash that they would want (imagine never having the chance to enjoy a bath or shower because there is no time to help you with that), getting dressed and having their medication. Even something as simple as a hot-water bottle may not be filled in time to help keep you warm.

All that is before we even get onto the personal interaction (a chat in other words) that so many vulnerable and isolated older people crave, or the care worker addressing any unexpected problems of a personal or domestic nature (health problems, heating breakdowns or water leaks for example – things that cannot be ignored as they could put the person in danger). You cannot possibly even begin to tackle all of these needs within a 15-minute window – it is degrading to the person who needs care to even try, and insulting to the care worker to expect them to hit that type of target.

We need to understand that care isn’t a luxury. It’s not a Gucci handbag or a Ferrari parked on your driveway. It is the most basic, fundamental thing that we all need. Most of us take care for granted because we can care for ourselves without any assistance, and then we have children and naturally find ourselves caring for them without giving it a second thought.

Imagine trying to give a baby all of the care it needs in the morning within a 15-minute window. We have maternity and paternity leave not just so that parents can bond with their child and establish their family, but because that child will need a lot of care. Many adults need similar levels of care and support, in a different context of course, yet many councils believe that it is achievable within 15-minute timeframes.

Our social care system is broken at the point in which we place a stopwatch on care, and why is that stopwatch there? Time is considered to be a useful way in which to price work, and the price on care is being continually squeezed. Public money either isn’t available, or hasn’t been made available, to fund the increasing care needs of our ageing population who are living longer but with far more complex long-term conditions. Even most people who privately fund their care do not have a bottomless pit of money and are still subjected to 15-minute care visits.

I fear as a nation we simply do not understand what care involves. The complexities of it and the fact that it cannot be rushed. We don’t place enough value of the importance of human interaction and the joy and comfort that it can bring. We don’t see care as an investment a compassionate society should be making, but rather see it as an annoying drain on resources that must be cut back to the bone. We bypass basic human rights, we tolerate the fact that it is undignified and lacking in compassion, and ultimately ignore the reality that it’s dangerous to try and provide care within 15-minute windows. We effectively treat prisoners better.

Yes social care needs more money, and sadly I don’t hold the purse strings, but it also needs an overhaul. Councils, commissioners and care agencies need to look at themselves and be honest – are they really proud of the work that they do? Can they achieve what they expect the average care worker to achieve in 15-minutes, and have they ever put themselves into the shoes of the person needing care?

I challenge you – time yourself. How much can you get done in 15-minutes that involves your personal care, basic nutrition and hydration, and caters for your need to be kept warm? Then consider how mobility problems, reduction in your sight and/or hearing, or any other medical problem might affect your ability to fulfil those needs. Then factor in having someone to help you so that you can overcome the limitations your body places on you. Then check your watch. I guarantee that you will need far longer than 15-minutes to achieve this.

Until next time...

You can follow me on Twitter: @bethyb1886

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D for desire

They say that sex sells, and yet when it comes to dementia no one talks about it let alone advocates it. The idea of older people, and particularly those living with dementia, feeling sexy, desirable, thinking about, talking about or wanting physical intimacy is a subject rarely broached and even less likely to be explored.

Yet sex isn’t the preserve of the young. We focus on sex education for children, teenage pregnancy rates, sexual objectification in society, the implications of widely available porn and the sex lives of celebrities, yet how often does anyone consider the needs of our older generations. Society focuses on those of childbearing age when it comes to talking about sex, wrongly assuming that when someone gets older they simply trade their reproductive organs and sexual desires for a zimmer frame and a bus pass.

Bear in mind that many of the people living with or likely to live with dementia in the future are the baby boomers – people who knew a thing or two about procreation and what it involved. The swinging sixties, when the pill was first made available, hemlines got shorter and free love reined is historically considered a time when sex was reinvented, taboos were broken down and it became more mainstream. Meanwhile, the younger generations who are providing the majority of today’s care workforce have been conditioned to think that they are the true pioneers of the sexual revolution.

The truth is that as we get older we don’t automatically lose our sex drive. It may diminish, and for some people go completely, but to assume all desire to feel physically attractive or engage in intimate physical activity leaves every person over a certain again (and certainly by the time they are likely to need help with their care) is totally inaccurate.

The nature of dementia is often to return someone living with it to their earlier life, which can have very contrasting effects on their sexual response. For some people they may be living back in their teens and twenties, eager to look their best and try to attract a mate. They may have no concept of being in their 70’s, 80’s or 90’s, and instead may have a very strong desire to engage in the sexual activity of their youth.

Whilst some earlier generations were very sexually liberated, for others sex was something never spoken about and generally only considered to be an activity within marriage. Imagine the horror someone from that background might feel when they need assistance with washing, dressing or incontinence care, particularly if they don’t recognise the person providing that help. For them, being naked may make them feel very uncomfortable and vulnerable.

It must also be remembered that for some people, their earlier sexual experiences could have involved pain, aggression, a need to fulfil a ‘duty’, a lack of trust or other disturbing circumstances, including abuse. For them, the intimate nature of personal care can be a throwback to a time that they would never want to revisit, and lead to extreme reactions such as emotional breakdown, aggression or refusal.

Dementia can also produce very uncharacteristic sexual responses, particularly an extreme lack of inhibition, whereby a person who was previously very conservative becomes very sexual provocative, may expose themselves without warning, or indeed make sexual advances towards anyone and everyone. It can be extremely embarrassing or upsetting for a spouse to witness this, and it can present problems for professionals too. As a paid carer, how do you cope with requests for sexual contact? Or finding someone you are caring for masturbating?

These are issues that even in our modern age of sexual enlightenment we don’t feel comfortable discussing, yet they are real and I guarantee that they are happening in homes, hospitals and care homes right now. Often issues of sexual desire produce laughter and jokes, but laughing at someone with dementia, labelling them (for example as a ‘dirty old man’) or taking the micky is never the right way to handle such a delicate situation.

I would suggest that gently placing unexpected sexual advances within the moral compass that is usually engendered in all of us from an early age (for example carefully explaining that you aren’t available due to being married to someone else etc) is sometimes all that is needed. Telling someone with dementia that they are already married and so must not feel this way often won’t work, as they may not remember that they are married and therefore won’t understand that context.

If someone with dementia is persistently touching themselves, especially in public, that can produce feelings of shame or embarrassment for their family or professionals caring for them. I remember frequently hearing a lady in dad’s care home chastising her husband when she found him masturbating, but shouting isn’t likely to help. Distraction techniques, or occupations that provide a sense of purpose, can help to avoid that confrontation.

Families, and especially a spouse or partner, often find the multitude of issues that can surface in relation to sexual desire and intimacy a hugely challenging aspect of dementia care.  From having a loved one with increased desire, to coping with a partner who doesn’t even want to kiss or hug you (as I wrote about here), issues of physical attraction and sexual expression are some of the hardest things to cope with, made worse by feeling that you cannot talk about them. Yet when you consider just how much sex is talked about in society, maybe it’s time we acknowledged and started to understand that desire isn’t just an exclusive club for the young. It’s for the young at heart too, and yes, even people living with dementia.

Until next time...

You can follow me on Twitter: @bethyb1886

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An urgent need to understand

There are a few ‘taboo’ subjects in dementia care. Taboo because we find them embarrassing, too personal or just uncomfortable to even consider. Continence is one of them.

Dementia isn’t a disease that respects the delicate workings of the bladder and bowel. Those vital signals that the brain needs to allow us to relieve ourselves comfortably and in privacy are often lost as dementia progresses. The devastation that incontinence can cause both the person with it, and potentially a spouse or family member who is caring for them, is immense. The more private a person is the harder it will be felt, which was certainly true for my father, who was incontinent for nine years. In his case it came about as a result of a crisis point in his dementia, when he had a large stroke and ended up in hospital (as I wrote about here).

He struggled to remain continent in the busy, unfamiliar hospital environment, and once he was moved into a residential care home he was largely doubly incontinent. Sometimes he was able to get to the toilet in time, or use a bottle, but more often than not he needed a pad. Not that dad himself understood the need for the pad, and he continuously removed it, leading to numerous accidents and changes of clothing.

By the time he was moved into nursing care, and then lost his ability to walk, he was fully incontinent and relying totally on pads. Key factors during those later years were spotting when his pad needed changing, ensuring it was done promptly, that he was thoroughly cleaned and dried, and then a new pad being available. Extraordinarily, at one point a directive was issued to the care home by the local health authority saying that they would only be supplied with a limited number of pads, leaving each resident with an allocation of 3 pads per 24 hours.

We fought against this rationing, eventually getting it overturned. In my view it is a basic human right to be kept clean and dry. It goes against every notion of dignity to restrict how many pads a person can have. If a baby was left in a dirty nappy, that would be considered child abuse. The same principles must apply to the care of adults.

Being left in wet or soiled pads increases the risk of UTI’s and other infections, pressure sores and associated skin problems, all of which are awful for the person affected. Moreover, as a money saving exercise rationing pads is entirely counterproductive, since the treatments needed to combat the effects are likely to cost far more. In someone with dementia, the discomfort of sitting in a soiled pad could also encourage them to put their hand into their pad, potentially getting faeces on their hands and spreading germs.

Accurately assessing someone for incontinence products is difficult since the very nature of incontinence is that it is unpredictable, and dependent on factors such as food and drink intake, the side-effects of medications, and unexpected issues like tummy bugs. Imagine an outbreak of diarrhoea and vomiting in a care home where most residents are immobile and incontinence pads have been restricted. We cannot condemn staff for providing poor care if they are not given the basic materials needed to provide good care.

That said, incontinence care isn’t just about having enough pads, how those pads are used is also vital. If care staff develop poor practices, like leaving someone in wet or soiled pads, or not cleaning and drying the person properly when they change a pad, all the supplies of pads in the world won’t help. Likewise, double padding, where two absorbent products are placed on top of each other, is another example of poor care. This is often done as a short-cut to avoid having to do a full-blow change every time a pad is soiled, but it is extremely bad practice since it is very uncomfortable for the person wearing them, will increase the risk of pressure sores, heat rashes and skin problems, and means that two products are likely to be contaminated.

Of course ideally you want to prevent incontinence to begin with, and I feel that in relation to my father he was rather written off in this regard. There is a prevailing attitude that incontinence is a natural part of dementia, but we need a far greater emphasis on helping people to remain continent for as long as possible.

So how do you help someone with dementia to remain continent? Mobility is vital. They need help to maintain their independence, using mobility aids if necessary, and these need to be readily available and able to fit inside the toilet cubical. Environmental factors are also extremely important. Is the route to the toilet clearly marked and free of obstacles? Is the signage clear (the word ‘toilet’ and a picture of a toilet, rather than male and female signs). Once inside the toilet cubical, is it clear where the toilet actually is (colour contrast rails and seat)? See the work of Stirling University for more tips on designing dementia friendly environments http://dementia.stir.ac.uk/virtualhome.

The other key issue in helping people to remain continent is to have assistance readily available. Having someone to help you to the toilet, or bring you a commode, may be all a person needs to remain continent. Like so many aspects of dementia care, time, patience, continuity of care and good communication are vital in promoting continence.

Once you get to know someone you may be able to anticipate when they need to go to the loo by picking up on key signs like restlessness, and can gently offer some support to get there. They may also feel more able to talk or motion about needing the toilet if they have continuity of care. Being able to estimate the urgency of a person's need for the toilet is a key skill, as is not becoming fatigued by someone with dementia repeatedly asking for the toilet, even when they have just been, which should never be seen as a deliberate attempt to mislead those charged with their care.

Someone with dementia can easily become confused about needing the toilet. They may forget they have been, may genuinely need to go again, or feel anxious about getting there in time, even if they don’t presently feel the need to go. Persistently asking for the toilet, and then not doing anything once there, can also result from being bored or needing human contact, hence why it is important to offer someone with dementia meaningful activity to keep them engaged and promote a good quality of life.

People with dementia can easily lose continence if they aren’t supported. They may even know that they need the toilet, but aren’t able to facilitate that due to their dementia and a lack of support. Changing our attitudes towards continence, and breaking down the taboo’s associated with going to the toilet, must be a key priority if we are to improve the care provided to everyone who is living with dementia.

Until next time...

You can follow me on Twitter: @bethyb1886

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Home alone

Imagine that every morning when you wake up, you are unable to get out of bed without the help of a carer. You might wake up quite early, needing the toilet or wanting a hot drink, but you live alone and rely on people who are paid to come and look after you.

You may wait many hours for help to arrive. It may never come if the home care agency don’t have enough carers on duty, or it may be much later than you expect because your carer has been delayed helping other people. In that time you may soil yourself, become dehydrated, or attempt to move around and end up falling, potentially breaking a bone and ending up in hospital, the shock of which, in someone who is elderly, could bring about premature death.

This is the reality that many single, vulnerable, elderly people with physical or mental health problems face every day. When care does arrive it can often be rushed, with the carer unable to give all of the help that is required. Imagine if you had to choose between being washed and dressed, helped to the toilet, fed or given your medication? You need assistance with all of those tasks, but your carer only has time to help with some of them, leaving you hungry or dirty as a result.

For many people who live alone, the carer that comes in to help them may be the only person that they see or speak to all day, and yet there is no opportunity for meaningful interaction. This is a system that is almost de-humanised, where the people who need care are effectively on a conveyor belt, and carers are operatives in a factory environment where output, rather than quality, is king.

Over the course of just a few weeks of home care you may see many different faces, each time having to try and explain (if you are able to) what you need and want. The turnover of staff is high because this is low-paid, often poorly trained work, where staff are put under immense pressure to meet deadlines, rush care, make stark and extremely unpleasant choices about what they realistically have time to do for someone, and where every shift leaves them feeling physically and mentally exhausted. Many carers often end up completing tasks in their own time, such are the time constraints enforced by their employers.

Morale is low, carers feel undervalued, and those who chose this type of work precisely because they genuinely wanted to care for vulnerable people feel utterly let down by a system that is run around two defining factors – the time on the clock and the money being paid to the home care provider.

Don’t run away with the idea that having home care is a cheap option for the most vulnerable, elderly citizens in our communities, because it isn’t. Universally however, most people would rather remain in their own home than move into alternative more supported accommodation or indeed into a care home. I would argue that everyone has the right to do that, whenever practically possible, and therefore in a compassionate society this should be supported, not just financially for those who need assistance paying for it, but from a cultural point of view as well.

The culture that defines how we care for older people in the UK is still one where we don’t value the person enough. As a society we don’t make provision for elderly people to exercise choice and be supported to do that, we cut corners because we think it doesn’t matter, we try to rush those who are naturally slower than they once were, we are incapable of seeing beyond ‘doing the basics’ and we ignore the need every human being has to feel cherished, loved, cared for, appreciated and listened to.

It can be very easy to blame the carers on the front line who have the day-to-day contact with our vulnerable elderly people, and there are certainly those within this line of work who should never be caring for anyone, least of all those in greatest need. But I believe that so much of what is wrong within the care system, and home care in particular, is about what happens within the companies that provide care and the authorities who commission it.

Many home care providers will say that they don’t get paid enough by councils (whose budgets have been squeezed in this area) to provide the care that people need. Councils will say that for the money they are paying, they expect far better for the people they are responsible for supporting. The real truth probably lies somewhere between these two viewpoints, but what I always find staggering in these debates is how the needs and the voices of the people who are on the receiving end of this care are generally never heard, and even more worryingly, those who are making the decisions often have no real appreciation of the situation that these people are in.

Of course we know of the cases, all too common, where home care has gone so catastrophically wrong that someone has died as a result of neglect. Yet all over the country, every day, neglect is happening, often not with immediately tragic consequences but with the slow-burn, saddening effect of reducing the lives of people who were once vibrant, hard-working, energetic and valued, into something that is a daily struggle to exist, a struggle that for many may not feel like one that they want to keep fighting for.

I couldn’t be a home care worker, simply because I could not cope with leaving people who needed me, at the same time knowing that if I stayed longer I let someone else down. It is an impossible situation. Home care is a vital resource that a compassionate society should value. Carers should be well trained, well paid and with enough colleagues to give our cherished elderly the help that they need in a time frame that they can cope with.

This is a job where you care for people with very high dependency and often multiple problems – it should be a profession with a far greater standing than it currently has. Ultimately care should be about helping people to flourish, live their lives well and feel happy and fulfilled. It should never be about losing dignity, being lonely, frightened, misunderstood, neglected and potentially an early death. If you offered anyone the ‘services’ in that last sentence, they would never sign up for them.

Until next time...

You can follow me on Twitter: @bethyb1886

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When illness strikes…

Dementia brings so many concerns for the wellbeing of those who are living with it, not least the risk posed by infections. Whenever my father was struck down by a bug, suddenly we would be plunged into a world of relentless uncertainty, desperately hoping that he would make it through his illness, always mindful of the possibility that he would not.  

One of the most striking things about dementia is the physical decline that it can bring. My father went from being a man with a very imposing physique to someone whose body shrunk to less than half its size. He went from walking constantly to being unable to move independently, from feeding himself to being entirely dependent on others for his food and drink intake. He lost the fullness in his face as a result of having no teeth, his limbs became bony, his skin very fragile and prone to bruising and tearing, and he was doubly incontinent for the last nine years of his life.

This physical decline leaves the person much more susceptible to infections that can be potentially life-threatening. Losing weight makes the body more vulnerable generally, and losing mobility makes pressure sores more likely and respiratory illnesses more difficult to shake off. Swallowing problems greatly increase the risk of pneumonia as a result of choking, or dehydration from not being able to intake enough fluids. Lack of fluids means an increased risk of urinary tract infections, and incontinence doesn't help with that either. Incontinence can also contribute to pressure sores if the skin is not kept clean and dry, and in a person with fragile skin all over their body, skin infections as a result of cuts or scratches are also possible.

In fact if you sit and think about just how many illnesses can be associated with the physical decline that dementia brings it is actually frightening. Over my father’s 19 years with dementia, and particularly during the last few years when he became very frail, we experienced all of the above problems. It comes as no surprise to me that so many people with dementia end up in hospital; my dad needed hospital treatment for both pneumonias and UTIs during the last 9 years of his life. This involved IV antibiotics and fluids, plus oxygen therapy, suction and chest physio for the pneumonias and catheters for the UTIs.

Thankfully, given the very mixed experiences people with dementia can have in hospital (as I wrote about here), my father was mostly treated in his care home with oral antibiotics. The routine prescription of antibiotics may be increasingly controversial now, but in my dad’s case they certainly gave us additional precious time with him.

Illnesses in people with dementia, apart from being very distressing to watch, often make dementia symptoms much worse. Infections contribute hugely to increased confusion and disorientation, affect communication, and can result in a loss of independence in areas of personal care, continence and eating and drink that is not always regained. Sadly, however, it is almost impossible to avoid a loved one becoming ill.

Care staff are frequently compelled to come into work when they are unwell, since they will either not be paid or their employers will be short-staffed if they stay at home. Visitors often come into care homes and hospitals harbouring illnesses, and requests to stay away if you are unwell go unheeded. I distinctly remember encountering disgruntled relatives outside a care home I arrived at one day, unhappy that they were unable to visit their loved one due to the home experiencing an outbreak of diarrhoea and vomiting.

I am not suggesting that care homes can become sealed germ free places, clearly that is impossible, but halting the spread of illnesses within health and social care settings, and the wider community, has to be the overriding aim. It should never be the case that people with dementia are considered a burden that can be reduced by allowing illnesses to proliferate, putting the most vulnerable at risk of serious complications and possibly early death.

We all suffer when we are unwell with an infection, but people with dementia often struggle far more because they cannot articulate how they feel, what help they need or the treatments that they would want. In those circumstances they need particularly specialised care delivered by knowledgeable and sympathetic professionals, whose priority is to give that person the most effective care possible so that they have the best chance of recovery.

Sadly some illnesses are too severe to recover from – the last pneumonia my father had was one too many for his frail body and led to a slow decline until he passed away a month later. We always knew the day would come when he could no longer fight, and given his physical frailties and propensity for chest infections, it was highly likely that pneumonia would end his life. Understandably, having worked this out many years before he passed away, every time he was ill that chilling realisation that this could be his last fight loomed large on the horizon.

Of course you never know when these illnesses will strike – my dad had severe infections in the summer as well as the winter - but I know that the majority of carers are fearful of winter ills the most. They often hit our elderly, vulnerable loved ones the hardest, and not just in care homes either – many people living in their own homes struggle to keep warm enough and become more susceptible to respiratory problems as a result. So whilst us younger people are all striving to keep ourselves well, spare a thought for all those carers with frail relatives for whom this is a particularly worrying time of year. If anything persuades you to be mindful of good hand hygiene and infection control, I hope that preserving the wellbeing of our most vulnerable people is it.

Until next time...

You can follow me on Twitter: @bethyb1886

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