What's it really mean to dream2~

This is one in a series of posts in which Trish attempts to dissect the purpose and meaning of dreaming; of looking beyond what is to what if~

Working my way towards the answer myself....and here's part III-dream, finale, I put on paper before me~

Back to my original post, my intent from the start of this search and query.

I'm risking.
I'm tossing my dreams out there.
Not to get responses. Not to hear the naysayers-neither the
encouragers.

I'm dreaming in pen and ink so I can see it
so I can live it
And so I can be it.

I'm tossing my dreams out there.
out here.

'I have become a sign to many; you are my strong refuge. My mouth is filled with your praise, declaring your splendor all day long.
psalm 71:7-8

I want to be a sign to many.
I don't know what that looks like.

I don't know what it even means.
I just know it gives me goosebumps when I say it.
my heart rate increases when I let my spirit feel it.
my mind goes numb when I try to wrap myself around it.

And that's enough for now.

Three big dreams.
Three Big Dreams.
They are out there.
They are out here.
In black and white.
Words on paper.
I've said them aloud.
I've written them aloud.
I've risked their exposure.
Risk
succeed or fail.

doesn't matter.
Only matters that I dream.
And live into it~

in love. trish

What's it really mean to dream-to ?

 This is one in a series of posts in which Trish attempts to dissect the purpose and meaning of dreaming; of looking beyond what is to what if~
Working my way towards the answer myself....


'The master of the art of living makes little distinction between work and play, labor and leisure, mind and body, information and recreation, love and religion. He simply pursues his vision of excellence at whatever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing. To him, he's always doing both.'
James Michener

My work is play, and my play is life.
I am blessed.
And yet~
I want more.
I am dreaming-to.
I have a dream-to.
Bigger. Bolder. More.
And it is good.
It is right.
It is prescribed.
He makes my feet like the feet of a deer, He enables me to go on great heights. Habakkuk 3:19

It is all good.
Dream. See how big you are really designed to be.
in love. trish

What's it really mean to dream?

This is one in a series of posts in which Trish attempts to dissect the purpose and meaning of dreaming; of looking beyond what is to what if~
 Working my way towards the answer myself....

I'm risking.
I'm tossing my dreams out there.
Not to get responses. Not to hear the naysayers-neither the
encouragers.

I'm dreaming in pen and ink so I can see it
so I can live it
And so I can be it.
I may fail.
But I don't care.
I will have tried; and become something more than myself right now for having done so.
I may succeed. And ironically the same theory stands: I don't care.
I will have tried, and become something more than myself right now for having done so.

What's your big dream?-No.
What's your biggest dream?
The one tucked into the back pocket of your heart; protected from others' sight but held close to your consciousness?
The one that makes your breath catch and your heart quicken and yet....
stops you up and makes you question your sanity.
struggles against the you, you are now.
stretches to be let free; and you are not sure if it is supposed to live in you so much as escape and go find its true home?!

Are you really enough to support something so big, so rich, so beyond?!

What is that dream?
Can you say it aloud?
Can you share it aloud?
What would happen if you did?
What will happen if you don't?
Are you willing to risk it?
And, which is riskier? doing, or not?
in love. trish

brilliance~

sharing from my EncaustiCamp blog....
"our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. " marianne williamson

How terrifying: To have this reality of the female heart revealed so blatantly. Perhaps the reality of the human heart.
What if we were to release our sense of the inadequate, realize it truly is a deeply impassioned desire to embrace a power that stirs in us and fully trust in this? What would happen? Where would we be taken on such a faith filled, passionate ride? Who would be impacted by our resolute determination to grab-hold of such a glory and move beyond that first unction to shine brilliantly? Not in and of ourselves, but with a light we cannot control; one that burns through us and grows exponentially, pulling in all who are near to embrace and enlighten and empower?
What if just one of us started?
What if just one of us believed?
What if just one of us trusted in our God given brilliance and awoke each morning to simply let it shine where it may? Just one of us~
in love. trish
shared from my EncaustiCamp site :)

rejection...but not mine!

Daniel called me Saturday. Michigan State University turned down his application. He called not only to inform me of this, but to brainstorm ideas and get my opinion on how to proceed. In other words, he hasn't given up hope! The tone of his voice was light and eager: If I hadn't heard him say the contrary, I would've thought he'd been accepted!
It broke my heart to realize he was experiencing this rejection and I couldn't take it from him. I'm starting to see that this will last my lifetime-feeling pain for my children and wanting to carry it for them. They'll be 60 years old-I'll be in a bungalow with my cats and paint brushes- and I'll still want to pull their pain and disappointment from them and carry it myself!
Yet, Daniel is proving beautifully resilient and quite fine without my arms to carry him~
Perhaps this resilience and positive, forward looking mentality is my carrying him. If we are to look at our children and assess from where personality traits are born, Daniel's positive attitude would be attributed to my gene pool. His ability to look through loss to opportunity is grown from the Baldwin part of his brain power! So in this perhaps I can say I am carrying his pain-helping him to move through the disappointment. Some of the best things in my life have grown from loss and rejection. They have not ended in the pain of them, they've thrived in the potential they create for growth in new opportunities.
And now it's time for my children to make these realizations and grow from their own pain. I pray I have been the model in which they can identify peace and opportunity in their difficulties. Even a little excitement in it; knowing that the rejection is just making room for something bigger. As it has been for me. Always look forward Daniel! in love. trish
earth is crammed with heaven.

guest room

I've never had a guest room before. When visitors would come to stay the boys got condensed into each others rooms to make pillow space for the temporary bodies. I've acquired one this summer. Furniture is being rearranged, carpets deep cleaned, windows washed in this hollowed out space. It's beginning to look like a blank slate rather than a vacuous hole that is missing its true substance. Where are the football jerseys?! Where are the tossed wrappers, dirty clothes and discarded golf cleats?!

It's not a pretty place; I am having trouble establishing a personality for the space. I can't seem to get myself around cleaning away the red, panther pride wall color or the collection of Jolt cans on the shelf. Three walls remain pristine in their boring bland white. The alchemy of teenager and visitor worthy space is still in process.

But there is definitely some pleasure in this creating. In the cleaning out corners, dusting desk tops and lying on the floor gazing at the ceiling in this uninhabited region of my cozy home I feel warm joy seep into my cells. God has a plan. The world carries a guidance system. I trust the enfolding of a life; touched by the unfolding of others' lives-fleetingly or forever-to take one where the path leads. And, creating a space in an empty 10'x12', envisioning its use in the coming years, blissfully musing my eternally positive thoughts for the future, brings me peace in the changing of life. I think I will come to enjoy my room for a guest~ in love. trish

zen quiet

I am painting now a days. Lots and lots of painting. With wax, with tar, with plaster, with oil, with glue, with fire. Painting. All this painting is being punctuated by regular dusting, organizing, scrubbing, pulling baby beets from my 4'x10' garden plot and mowing my lawn of similar dimensions. Yet mostly painting and painting and painting. Just as I desired my days to enfold this summer: To fall gently into the peace of not being beckoned to fill a belly or find clean socks. After the first day of stabbing anxiety at the emptiness in this change to alone, I have found the zen that has been suggested exists in the acceptance of quiet.

Waking at 4am to plug in the palette, organize the papers, listen to the bird chirp and sip the coffee. Eating lunch over an arrangement of carving tools and watching the sun set while hitting firing up the propane torch. Doing, seeing, acting, feeling, being-just as I want. Just as I need. Just as I feel. Selfish. Entirely, self indulgently selfish. Yet, accepting this and simply moving with it is giving me so much learning, so much feeling, so much accepting and so much love. Recognizing the value in alone; and the deep necessary value of every rich, difficult, blessed, challenging bit of life. in love. trish

wearing the right fit

I find that I get better at standing in my own shoes the more I do it. Makes perfect sense, I know, but let me explain. For most of my life I've trod the path of others-in borrowed shoes if you will. I never realized they were shoes on loan; I thought I was wearing my true fit when I was taking steps in them. But in bits and pieces over the years I began to feel that missteps and stumbles along my life's path weren't happening because I had made an incorrect choice but rather because I was trying to make someone else's shoes fit my form. My feet, my soul, was trying to move me on the path true to it while the shoes I was wearing were trying to keep me pointed in the direction they had laid for me. A clashing of finality occurred nearly six years ago now and the ability for the two forces to coexist on this one set of ten toes became definitively impossible. The stumbles and missteps of previous years came back to me for what they were-attempts by my true soul to carry me instead of the borrowed imposter's. Sometimes it takes a sledge hammer to the side of the head to come to this realization and send the borrowed, incorrectly fit sneakers flying off one's feet. Sometimes one is gifted with the ability to chose and wear the perfect fit from birth.

Little stumbles and missteps still occur today, two years after complete assimilation to this true set of walking shoes designed just for me. But the stumbles are recognizable as my own misguided steps and I am quick to take notice, listen and realign the direction the toes are pointed.

To come to be wearing my size as I have-after being directed by a surrogate set for so long-the walking now a days has a brightness, an intensity and passion in each and every moment that still stands to astound me. Awake. Smiling and fueled by life. in love. trish

smile now

do you forget sometimes? to smile? wake up and smile. how many lives would change, days would shine or hearts would open if everyone began with a smile? and, if not a smile, then what? and if not now, when?

smile now. trish