WARNING: This blog is ritten in Bear English, wich is phonetic. An that is mor than yu can say abowt the werd "phonetic".
Showing posts with label bear sports. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bear sports. Show all posts

Friday, April 11, 2008

Weer bak!

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

Phwah! Tayke that!

Wa-heyy! Weer bak!

We had grayte fun in the New Forest for a few days! We brort bak loades ov fotoes an me an Mummy ar goin to sort them owt so I can post all abowt the playses we went to, the trees I pooed behind an the caykes we ate. Oh yeah, an Dilly had a berfday.

Meenwile, I'm off to chek yor messidges (ooo thanks for thoze!!) an heer is a foto to keep yu smilin. This waz sent to me by Mr Woo, Duk an Bear, hoo liv wiv my Arnty Christina in Ostraylia. In it yu can see sum yung Bears lernin the art ov Kararty. I hav offen menshund how we lern this in Spy Collidge, but sum hav dowtid my werd on the subjekt (yes, I kno, it's hard to beleev, but...) So heer is proof! Phwah!

Bloo pants on tomorro, pleez! Gillingham ar playin Swansea tomorro an to be onnist, they've been so good, I'm wonderin if our lot will tern up.

Bye fer now!!!




Friday, July 20, 2007

Bear! Not-a-Bear!

Yesterday's scores:
  • Gills: no
  • Simpsons: yes
  • Tesco: no
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 30 hahaha tript Henri up on the way to gettin me, an then got him wen he was on the way up agen, hence incurrin the tripol scor rool /10
  • Day Score: 7ish /10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

Today I want to introdews yu to another grayte Bear Sport. It's calld "Bear! Not-a-Bear!".

Heer ar the rools:

  1. Ther ar Bears an ther ar Not-A-Bears. Yu hav to kno the diffrence.
  2. Yu tuch yor nose to the Bear or Not-a-Bear's nose.
  3. Yu showt "Bear!" or "Not-a-Bear!" at the sayme time.
  4. Yu can start owt by yewsin pikchers ov Bears an Not-a-Bears in books (see demo).
  5. Make the payper vershun ov the sport harder by speedin up.
  6. Wen yewsin reel live Bears an Not-a-Bears, try to get permishun ferst.
  7. Wen yewsin reel live Bears an Not-a-Bears, scor poynts off yor opponent by dukkin at the larst moment so their nose duzzent mayke contact wiv yors. The wun hoo dukt gets the poynt.

It's kwyte strate forwerd wunse yu get goin. I've dun a demo for yu wich I'm shor will mayke it all perfickly cleer.

Hav a go. Ah go on, enjoy yorselfs! It's the weekend an skool's finisht fer summer. (I kno cos Daddy's a teecher, an he cayme home wiv lots ov choklit from the Scary Monsters today).

If yu video yorselfs playin this gayme I'll put the foottidge on me blog.

Over the weekend, I'll show yu sum foto's ov Not-a-Bears playin this gayme.

Wa-heyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bye fer now!

Monday, July 02, 2007

Investigaytin The Bear

Phaseoutgirl Interviews Bob

Do yu kno, Mummy rote bak to PhaseOutGirl an sed that her kwestchons mite be a bit hard fer a yung Bear to arnser. Wat a cheek!!!!! She had them "on hold" in MS Werd, but I sneakt in an got 'em. Ha! I'll show her! Heer goze....


1. Your blog gives the impression that you are an animal lover. Why did you choose the persona of a small bear and not another animal? Any particular significance?

Oh yes, I am indeed an animol luver. I think weer grayte. Far less complicaytid than hewmans. An nicer too, most ov us. Not shor abowt croco-dragons. But most ov us ar.

An yes, havin the personality of a Bear has very particular significants, as I am a Bear. An a particular Bear, at that.

2. I also noticed that you call yourself "agony uncle" and write in "bear language". Can you explain the agony uncle bit, and how it is to write in a different language. Aren't you worried that people won't understand what they are reading?

Ah well, wen I startid bloggin I arnserd letters from Yunger Bears hoo needid advice but dident hav an Older Bear to luk up to. Yu can see sum ov these on my list of "Informativ Exampols-Ov-Bob Posts" on the rite hand side of my blog.

Bears (an Not-A-Bears) ar still always welcom to rite in wiv their problems for me to help solve.


I'm akchewally tri-ligual cos as well as Bear English an Brit-English, I do Spanish too, cos I yewst to liv in Ekwadoor wiv my Daddy. I prefer to blog in my ferst languidge to mayke it easier fer other Bears to reed. Ther arnt menny Blogs owt ther in our languidge, yu kno.

A few peepol hav sed that they carnt reed it. Sumtimes I get narsty messidges sayin I carnt spell. So I rite bak an say, "Well yu carnt reed Bear English, but I don't get narsty abowt it!"


3. Stepping out of the bear character, what does Bob really do and what is he most interested in?

I'm a Bear ov cheeky character, I admit, but ther is a seriuss side to me. I'm a trayned Secrit Agent an cud "phwah!" yu wiv a cunnin karate chop.

Tayken at my Graduayshun from Spy Collidge. On the left is my cuzzin, Henri. We keep in tutch. In fact, he's stayin wiv us at the moment. That's me, on the rite. Our "FIFA" badges stand fer "Federayshun of Internashnol Furry Agents".


As fer my intrests, well, pants, oviussly, then The Simpsons, going shopping, collektin shiney pennys, monitorin rools, navigaytin, marigolding, and sport. I like footboll an I go to watch it wiv Daddy. An Bear sports, like Synchronized Sitting. I also enjoy modern art an will be lornchin a gallery soon.


4. You are given a million pounds to spend on anything, except for yourself and your immediate family. What would you do and why?

WOW thanks!

I wud giv it all to animol charitys, like WSPA, hoo do lots of grayte things to rescew Bears in distress. An The Great Bear Foundayshun too. Ther ar links to them, an other animol charitys on my blog.
Why? Well, sum hewmans hert animols. I don't like that. It also maykes my Mummy cry. I don't like that either. Sumtimes the animols ar hert so much that ther arnt menny ov them left in the wild. I think that nice hewmans shud help us an mayke up fer wat the narsty wuns do. An if they don't, I will. That's wy I'd yews the munny to help.


5. A stranger knocks at your door and tells you that he is a long lost relative, and found your name in letters of his grandparents. He needs shelter since he has had a string of bad luck, is asking for help. He is travelling with his wife and a sick three year old son in their car, and they look really desperate. To top it all, his resemblance to one of your siblings is uncanny. How would you deal with this situation?

Ferst I'd invite them in an get them cups of tea an lots of toast an hunny. Then I'd go an get my Emergensy Hug Pants, cos I mite be a bit scared, akchewally.

I'd arsk Daddy to drive the littol boy up the rode to the hopsikol to mayke him betta. (I wuddent go wiv them, in cayse the boy was sik on me. That stuff mite stik to my fer.) An if the man did look enything like MY sister, I think he wud want to see the docter, too.

Dilly. My sister, & ownly siblin. Yu seriuss?

Then I'd go an get Mummy, an check her Famly Tree. She resercht her Famly Tree larst year an got bak to 1680. I was very prowd cos she fownd out that sum ov her ansesstors wer -wait fer it!- BREECHES MAKERS!!!! WA-HEYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But I digress......

Wunce the boy was bein lookt arfter, we'd show the visitors the Family Tree an ask wher they think they fit in. (Bein a spy, they mite not be tellin the trooth, they mite jus be on to me.) If they had nowher to go, we'd let them stay the nite an then call my Arnty an Unkols abowt it. Maybe we cud all meet up at the weekend fer a famly picnic, an get to the bottom ov it all.

But I'd hav to arsk my Daddy, reelly.


Thank cu fer the interview, Cecilia!



IF ENY OV YU WUD LYKE ME TO INTERVEW YU, PLEEZE SAY SO ARFTER THIS POST! Ah, go on!

Now, I've got to put this bit at the end. It issent in Bear English, this bit, so eny Bears out ther, I hope yu hav a translaytor handy if yu need wun...


Do YOU want to be interviewed?

Interview rules:

1. Leave me a comment saying "Interview me."

2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.

3. You will update your blog with a post containing your answers to the questions.

4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

More on Synchronized Sitting

Yesterday's scores:

  • Gills: yes. we drew 2-2, even tho' de other side lost their goalie and had to play with 9 men on the field. Still, could be werse......
  • Simpsons: no
  • Tesco: yes
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: still suspended/10
  • Day Score: shut up!/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

I have received a queery about that great Bear sport, Synchronized Sitting. Wookey Bear's mum, Audrey, writes:

Bob it was really interesting reading about the window sill family of
bears..........Sometimes Wookey and I do some sychronized sofa sitting, Honestly
a bear and a not a bear synchronized sofa sitting, it can be done.........
Excellent team work although it has to be said Wookey has a much better
attention span than I do....he can sit all day, but I unfortunately usually only
manage 5 hours at the most.........any tips?Audrey (not a bear and not a
boy!!)

Well, Audrey, Mummy carn't do it. She's a real fidget. Dilly can. 'Speshelly if it also involves staring. Dilly is good at staring. She's been known to outstare cats, goldfish and statues. Daddy is quite good at it. I thought he had beaten me the other day but then I noticed he'd fallen asleep infront ov his computer agen and so wasn't really taking part any more. As fer tips, practice practice practice. And always hav a dam' good scratch before you start. Hav yu ever seen a group of not-a-bears having a good scratch before settling down? Dey were about to do synchronized sitting. Meerkats are quite good for remembering the scratch part, and the synchronized part, but alas, usually do as daddy does, and fall asleep.

< - here some meerkat Synchronized Sitters have started well but we see dem as wun got distracted.

Here some meerkats are getting de hang ov it- >

Bye fer now!

Friday, October 20, 2006

Team Bears!

Yesterday's scores:
  • Gills: no
  • Simpsons: yes
  • Tesco: no
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 10/10
  • Day Score: 8/10


HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

I have found this photo showing how brilliant bears are at teamwork, especialy when it comes to getting at the "hunny flapjacks". If you click on it you can go and look at their dad's other photo's, including lots more Bears.

There is a Bear family that live in our house. We call them Der Window-Sill Bear Familee, on account of how they sit in the window most days. They come down off the window-sill on Tuesdays an Thursdays, which we call 'T days'. This sometimes helps mummy as, if she can't remember what day it is, the first place she checks is the window-sill. Least then she can narrow down the possibilities.

The Window-Sill Bears came to us from Mr Andrex. I had to save lots of Andrex boxes an' send them some busfare. Then they came a few weeks later, with a bag of Cold Capsules, tea bags and a packet of "tishoos". They had a book with them, in which weer pictures of them sitting on a window-sill. This is how we knew they liked to do that.

Here we are together playing "Synchronised Sitting" on a 'T day'. Well, on a sofa, really, but during a 'T Day':

Synchronised Sitting

Bye fer now!