WARNING: This blog is ritten in Bear English, wich is phonetic. An that is mor than yu can say abowt the werd "phonetic".
Showing posts with label Santa's Littol Helper. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Santa's Littol Helper. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Gettin Blaymd. Agen.

Yesterday's scores:
  • Gills: no
  • Simpsons: yes
  • Tesco: no
  • Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: um...fergot /10
  • Day Score: 7/10
HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

Sumtimes yu think it's gonna be a good day an then it chaynges. It's like sumwun is drivin yor day in a bus an then they desyde to tern a corner so that yu go parst the soo-er-ridge werks insted of the mownten vews yu wer expektin. Today waz like that. A bit.

Mummy went into town an bort sum new Laydy-Bump pants. Theez arnt like ordenry pants that a boy wud ware. Come to think ov it, no gerl pants ar like wat boys wud ware. Exsept fer Peter Stringfellow. But I think he's up to sumthing. Enyway. As I waz sayin, Laydy-Bump pants. Theez ar wat gerls ware under their jumpers to keep things in playse wen they're runnin fer the bus.

Dilly got a tad confewsd wen she red the labol on the new wuns, cos they wer French, an in French they ar called Bonnets. So Dilly, bein ov a type that is kwite parshal to the odd bonnet, put them on her hed, screamed, cos she duzzent like the dark, then tryd attakin them.

Bein ov a type that is kwite parshal to the odd bonnet. Unfortewnitly fer Dilly, sed new bonnets wer very odd, an much larger than this wun.


At this poynt Mummy cayme bak from the barthroom an accewsd me of havin frolikt them, as they wer now on the flor, an Dilly waz noware to be seen (exsept by yors trooly: she waz on top ov the dor) so muggins heer got the blayme.

I'm not eevn into Laydy-Bump pants. Yu carnt mayke a deesent hammok out ov them. They're the rong shaype. Just as yu think yu've got a good baysis fer a stretch out, they go in an owt agen. It jus duzzent werk.

Well, maybe if yor Mummy iz Dolly Parton, yu mite be abol to mayke it werk. But my Mummy issent, an no matter how much she thinks she needs to go on a diet, there jus issent enuff for a small Bear ov my kaliber to be intrestid on a construkshun baysis.

An yu carnt get a good frolick owt ov them cos yu end up in a not. An yu jus KNO that the hooks will hook on the bits ov yu that hooks hav no bizzness knowin abowt. So there. It wassent me.

Well I gayve up tryin to convinse her an went off an watcht The Simpsons.

It waz wun ov my favrit eppysodes: the wun ware Santa's Littol Helper gets puppies:

Hmmm.... I notiss that Lisa duzzent ware Laydy-Bump pants. A Bear wud be sayfe, huggin up to her. Ahhh......

Bye fer now!