I do wish they'd grow up!

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: no
• Simpsons: yes
• Tesco: no
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: postponed/10
• Day Score: 7 ish /10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

At larst!

I havent been abol to get enywhare near the pewter cos Dilly's been postin fotoes ov fir cones on her blog fer Stanley. Go an chek it owt, if yu like, but remember, yu'll never get those minits bak.

Rite. Whare waz I?

Oh yeah. Old Bears.

Sumtimes it's a trial to hav Bears ov a significantly grayter age than wunself rownd heer. Mr Grunter is ok, as he jus sleeps on the spare bed all day. An Grayum iz fun, fer a bit, on his own. But Grayum an Mulligan together?

They wer up all nite arguing over hoo waz the best singer in the werld. Mulligan rekons Andy Williams an Grayum is plumpin fer Perry Como.

HOOO the?

I thort Andy Williams waz a myth, yu kno, like King Arthur or sumwun. -Evrywun's herd ov him but kno he livd so long ago he probly wassent real. As fer Perry Como, I thort that waz a mayke ov kitchen gadget as in "Yor new kettol, is it a Philips?" "No, it's wun ov them new Perry-Como's."

Mulligan an Grayum: lokt in an Old-Man staring contest. This waz tayken 3 hours in.

Grayum dident eevn want to com to football today. He's determind to win the argument. They're in an old-man staring contest now. Old-man staring contests ar awful cos they yewzerly fall asleep in the middol ov them an ownly wayke up wen sumwun starts peein himself. Still, at leest they've stopt singing.

I'm off to help Mummy mayke a banarnana cayke. Sheez got frends comin up tomorro, an she needs me to test it for them.

Bye fer now!

Bit mor re Air Travol

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: no
• Simpsons: yes
• Tesco: yes, finally! I got to ride in the trolley. It waz a bit ov a rusht vizit, as the lites on the car hav broken, so we had to skoot arownd befor it got dark. Hehehee. Mummy puts her feet on the base ov the trolley and pushes herself up an down the isles goin "weeee". Hehehee. Bless.
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 10/10
• Day Score: 7.83946219547861356431/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

Thank cew fer all yor messidges ov serpport fer Bobbus Bearus Maximus, hooz problim I feetcherd yestaday. I hav now had a reply from him, an wat a fine fello he looks too- this is he:

I'll let him explayne hoo the littol wuns sittin on his hed ar:

I thought yud like to see a pictur of me. Im a verry simlar color to Mr Grunter. Maybe when Im an old bear I will hav a yewneek nose shaype to. I sertenly get enuff cuddles. In the backgrownd yu can just abowt see my frends: Jorj and Pi. Jorj is a verry old bear. In fact hes aynshent. He has brite orrinj i's wich r a bit scary. Pi is an oktopus and he swam ashor at Jon a Growts wen we wer on holiday last year. He had bin cort in a fishermans net and had lost to legs and wossent doing verry well so we adopted him even tho hes notabear.

Thanks, Bobbus Bearus Maximus! Mummy waz a tad worreed at ferst that Pi waz a spider, an she duzzent like those. In fakt, she feeds them to the vacewm cleener.

Bobbus is still kwite yung but as yu can see, he is alreddy gettin the tell-tayle hugger-nose shape. This chaynge in nayzal dyrekshon can corze sumthin like arfrytus in Bears, an this can be treeted by rubbin on sum hunny. Wunse it's been on there fer an hour or so, yu can lik it off, or jus rub yor nose into a bit ov soft bred, and then that'll do yor lunch.

Enyway, Bobbus ashors us that if he goze to the airport he wil carry extra choklit to giv to them in exchaynge fer them not unstitchin him to investigayte his voyse box. He adds:

I will let yu no how I get on if I go on the plane at Krismas as Im shur other bears in my possishon wuld like to no.

Int that nise ov him?

I'm not shor ware he comes from, but he serpports Aberdeen Football so he mite be up in Scottyland. (WOW, I hav sum cuzzins up there!)

Oooo! Oooo! That reminds me! Gillingham ar playin tomorro, so on wiv yor bloo pants an stuff, evrywun! The gayme starts erly, at 12 noon. Those ov yu in USA, it mite be an idea to go to bed warin sumthing bloo, rather than get up an chaynge in the middol ov the nite.

Wa-heyyy!

Bye fer no!

Bears an Air Travol

Hullo Not-A-Bears!

I've reseevd a kweery from a Bear regardin Air Travol:

Hello Bob T. Bear. My name is also Bob. My Roman name is Bobbus Bearus Maximus coz I'm kwite a big bear and I like Romans.

Wy, hullo there, Bob! It is always nise to heer from a fello Bear, an I see yu ar also a fello Bob! An may I tayke this opportewnity to compliment yu on such a fine nayme!

Anyway I woz hoping yu cud giv me sum advis as yu seem a very nowlijable bear. My frend who looks after me wants to take me on a airoplane at krismas so we can visit her famlee. But, her boyfrend says that coz I hav a voys box inside my body the peepol at the airport mite not let me go and mite unstich me or take me away and not giv me bak. So its safer if I stay at home.

Hav you herd of any other bears with voys boxes that have bin on a airoplane? Do you think it will be safe for me to go or shud I fone the airport and try and get a bear passport?

By! from Bob

PS I hope your marigolds are doing well.

Well, Bob, I do kno a Bear wiv a voyse box as it happens, an his nayme is Mr Grunter. He is very old an yewst to carfter Mummy wen she waz a littol gerl. But he has never been on a airoplane.

Mr Grunter: a Bear ov respektabol dottage. He acheevd his yewneek nose-shaype throo menny yeers of huggin.

So I went an arskt the laydy that werks at the Colchester Bear Adoptshun Senter. I'm afrayd she dident kno much abowt this either, an sed yor Mummy shud chek wiv the airport befor yu go.

We Bears had a diskushon abowt it, an we think that so long as yor voyse box werks it shud be ok. But sum Bears hav them an don't need to yews them enymor, so they don't mayke a noyse. Well if this is the cayse wiv yu, it mite be a bit dayngeruss to go. I meen, if a big fat Customs fella x-rays yu an sez, "Hullo, wat's that bit in the middol?" an yu say (wiv the voyse box) "It's my voyse box!" he'll jus say, "Oh, okydokey then, off yu go."

But if he spots the voyse box an it duzzent werk, then yu carnt proov it's a voyse box, an he mite think yor smuggling in sum speshol choklit or hunny or sumthing, and go an operayte on yu jus so he can steel it!

It is all very frytenin, but I kno yu ar brayve as yu ar a Bear. An a Bob Bear, at that.

So enyway we agree that yu shud get yor Mummy to call the airport an arsk them abowt it. Jus to be shor.

Regardin passports, yes, evry travlin Bear shud hav wun. Heer's a pic ov mine:

I had to blot out sum detayles, ov corse, wat wiv bein a spy an all.

Don't worry abowt those X-rays, by the way. They tickol a bit, but they're ok.

I'm sorry I havent been abol to help yu mor. Perhaps, if eny ov my reeders kno abowt voyse boxes an airports, they cood let us kno-???

Oh, by the way, yes, my marigolds ar still doin well! Heer is a foto I jus took ov sum ov them for yu. It's the middol ov the nite heer, so the foto's a bit dark. Sorry bowt that.
Bye fer now!!!

Query about glasses

Yesterday's scores:

• Gills: yes!!!!
• we beat Carlisle scum 2 - 0 waheyyy!!!
• Simpsons: no
• Tesco: yes - an we bort pants!
• Nose Hugs Surprizisity Score: 8/10
• Day Score: 8.9/10

HULLO NOT-A-BEARS!

I'm back! And Gillingham akchewally won this weekend! And I know what did it! He-he! -We all went to Granny's an wen we got there Daddy sed, "Oh no! I've left my bag behind!" so we went to Tesco an bort him a T Shirt, socks, toothbrush and...... PANTS! Yes, Daddy wore brand new Tesco pants in Gills blue. I'm shor this helped. Now I just hav to remember where I hid his bag......

Enyway, last week I reseeved an email asking whether Bears ever needid to wear glasses. Well, yes, sum ov us do. Yewsually older Bears or wuns who are into Harry Potter.

I delayed posting this answer as I was waiting for some Bears I know to come back off holiday, so that I could ask to yews this photo of them wearing their glasses. I'm glad they sed yes. An if yu click on the photo you'll go to their photo album, where you can see them posing in front of French touristy bits..............

cool dudes

There is a very old bear that lives wiv us, Grunter. But he duzzent need glasses, mainly cos he's usually asleep an he knows what the pillow looks like. I've never seen croco-dragons in glasses, which is a shame, as it seems a waste of a really long snout. Aha! No exterior ear. That'll be why.

Bye fer now!