Facebook Community Standards and the Southern Vernacular

 I was kicked of Facebook twice in recent months. It would seem they think I'm a violent person. I'll wait while you laugh...

 But what the real problem is comes down to Facebook Community Standards lack of understanding the Southern vernacular. The things I said are harmless in the Southern Vernacular but "Bless Your Heart" is deadly on the tongue of a wicked woman.

Here's what went down: 

Scenario 1 - last fall: My cousin posted a video of fake snakes dropping from trees over inner tubers. 

There is nothing I find more terrifying to me than snakes and this joke is particularly upsetting to me. I still remember when I was about 12 and a king snake (not that I stopped to notice his pedigree) fell into our boat on Dixie Springs Lake in Summit, Mississippi. It was mere moments later when I decided I could walk on water. My poor step dad was wrestling a snake with one hand and holding on to the waistband of my jeans with the other! Needless to say, this joke is a worst nightmare for me.

So I commented on my cousin's post, "I would have to kill somebody!" 

Which, if you know Southern vernacular, I doesn't mean I want to harm anyone. It simply means, I gonna get you back for that...probably with an equally horrible joke!

What Facebook doesn't know is my cousin is cop and mandated reporter. If she thought I was a threat to anyone, or myself, she would have done something. She laughed at my comment and my suspension.

Within seconds of that post, Facebook has already made my post invisible and sent a message that I had violated community standards. OK... I'll remove it. But NOOOOooo. I can't even see the post again! What a stupid way to deal with that! But life goes on...

Scenario 2 Late January- A sorority sister who is outspoken and has sass for days posted a meme to the effect of "I don't need a vaccine. I've got the "Freedom Virus!""   Minutes before, my mom's nursing home had called to inform me of her Covid positive test. I was livid. I thought my mom had received her 3rd shot last fall, but no, she had not. It had only recently been approved in Mississippi (months after the CDC approved it!).

I also am shocked that workers in nursing homes are not required to be vaccinated. Visitors are not required to be vaccinated. I find that appalling! I was hurt, worried and angry.

I replied to the post with: "Just found out my 98yo mom has covid. I guess I'm going to have to kidnap her across state lines to get her properly vaccinated!" 

Which, if you know Southern vernacular, "kidnap" is as common as a birthday party! I actually did kidnap my college friend to take him to his surprise birthday party....blindfold and restraints were used! But we also were making no effort to hide our voices and lit his cigarettes for him. He wasn't scared at all! 

But it's nothing to say, "I'm just gonna kidnap you and go have lunch and mani pedis one day!" 

I was immediately "banned" from Facebook for 2 days. Ok. That's fine. But I am a scarred and wrecked individual who has had to deal with rejection my whole life. If you don't want me...I don't want you for longer! So I decide Facebook gets a 3 x ban. I would go for 8 days. As FB lost over $200 BILLION while I was gone, I willingly accept full credit for that! LOL!

What Facebook doesn't know is that thread was full of other sorority sisters who know I have power of attorney over my mother and it's MY business where I take her and if I choose to get her properly vaccinated.  

While I was off Facebook, I started on all the taxes: mine, the business, Mom's. It went quick. I didn't miss it. But 8 days later I was back on for 1/2 a day when "Facebook Community Standards had reviewed my account" and saw that first post and decided I needed a time out for 2 weeks for "repeated violations." My posts would be visible on my wall but would get "pushed down" in the feeds of my friends. 

So...2 weeks for me and 6 weeks for Facebook. I've been off for two months and I honestly haven't missed it! I don't miss "doom-scrolling" for hours on the weekends. My birthday came and went and instead of the uncomfortable bombardment of messages, I had the peace and quiet I crave with only a few calls from my closest friends. I realized the illusion that I have so many "friends" ...is just that. 

I have found I really enjoy actually watching some things on the telly...instead of ignoring it while I scroll on Facebook. I actually love doing Sudoko and Mah Jong puzzles on my ipad. I've taking drawing classes on Youtube. I've made some jewelry for the first time in years! I've enjoyed just sitting on my porch and watching the birds at sunset. 

I've realized what a time suck Facebook is... and a not very pleasant one! There are some pages I miss.  I really love the local Buy Nothing group. The generosity of my neighbors astounds me and I miss the free produce I got there. My favorite gift was the couple who bought a huge wedding cake to celebrate their son's elopement with a few family members. They gave away slices of wedding cake to everyone in town! (Pre-pandemic!) I also really love the Schitt's Creek group...happiest show on television = happy people on Facebook! I miss seeing the baby pictures of all the kids in the family too. I also started following my favorite talking dogs on TikTok and Youtube. (Maizy is getting buttons for her own AAC device! Stay tuned!)

I also learned how much I miss only sharing on Facebook. You rely on random "memories" to pop up and you can't search your own wall.  I ran across a story about Macy Blue that made my heart sing. And it made me angry that I had forgotten about it and that I never shared stories HERE where I could find them again! 

Macy was playing with a toy on the sofa. I took it. She got up and got another toy. I took it too. Unfazed, she got up and got another toy from the toybox. I took it as well. I was thinking she would engage in play with me or take them back...like Mabel would have. Instead she lay there looking at me for a moment and then, with her paw, raked the tv remote close to her and placed her paw on top of it. "Yeah lady! You take my stuff, I'm gonna take yours!" 

Stories like that should not be wasted on "Crapbook!"

I need some rules: I'm going to try 20 minutes total and NEVER on weekend if and when I'm ready to go back.  

Unless Facebook learns the vernacular of our different regions - which, why would they? Unless, they allow people to edit or delete when the violate some standard, they are going to continue to loose viewer hours and visits. It certainly doesn't instill a feeling of goodwill. People are always looking for the next fun thing. Bless your heart, Facebook. Bless your heart.

Narcissism

I'm in Baton Rouge to take my 95-year-old mother's car away from her. I feel like the meanest daughter on the planet. She's been crying since I got here, intermixed with fits of anger.She has a benign brain tumor, an aneurysm and she's banged up her 5-year-old ride at least 10 times. It's full of dents.  She says she's just going to go buy another car. Add in that she let her insurance lapse 3 years ago for about 6 months and now owes a $300 fine to the LA DMV and therefore, has no driver's license and you'll understand my concerns over my graying hair.

CH (looking in the mirror at my vast amounts of gray: Look at all my gray hair! YOU caused that! (I say to her, laughing.

Mom: Look at mine! It's solid white!

CH: Mine is from staying up all night worrying about YOU!

Mom: Mine too!

CH: Worrying about yourself?

Mom: Yep.

I'm Half Alive but I Feel Mostly Dead

Sigh... You know that really tired down deep in your bones? Yeah, I got that. Today was the first day in about three weeks I didn't  have to be somewhere . I still had things to do: beads to ship, rubber stamp orders that have been piling up for weeks. Instead of doing what I should, I hung out in my pjs, drank a second cuppa, snoozed, made lunch, slept hard, hiked hard and got my tomatoes in the ground after dark.

This last week has been particularly emotional and grueling. I've been working a lot and feeling a bit lost without those boys I got to teach for 22 days. I got to see them yesterday after a week away. I got a hug from all of them. Made my day! But being back on a single track teaching gig has my head spinning. Last week I taught TK (4-5 year olds)... my hugger was also a puker that day! Next was 6th grade. Then it was 10th grade math, followed by psychology and American history for 12th grade - Where the prof had the audacity to call Elvis the "supposed King of Rock and Roll!" SUPPOSED??? WTH??? He didn't give himself the name like the supposed King of Pop did! That our society has regressed so far that Elvis has become the supposed King makes me sit here shaking my head wondering about the future of the planet.

Two people I know passed away last week. One was an Internet friend but a political blogger I've read for years who had lots of real life ties to people I know. We had become friends on Facebook a few months ago after his mom passed away and... I so wanted to meet him someday. I find it sadly ironic he died after seeing the dentist. The other was someone from real life that I haven't gotten to see much in recent years. Surgical procedure / complications / blood clots / heart failure / life support. Each update was sadder than the last. And one of my California family is battling cancer. That my sister adored him (and Mom too) makes it that much sadder. My mom asks for updates daily as if some miracle is bound to happen...making me ache that there is nothing new or good to tell her.

I tell you all this to explain...I'm just tired, exhausted and wonder if the world is ever going to feel normal (better??) ever again.

 All is not dark and sad or tired. This girl brings me great joy every day! Look at her playing with a new toy a friend sent her:

I hope we'll get back into our blogging routine soon...

*apologies to Jewel for the title.

Crafty Wall Hanging

It's been forever since I posted something crafty here. And since the bead blog is about beads and the stamp blog is about stamps... and this is neither, I thought I would share it here.

I don't remember what artist did this on Carol Duvall, but it's just my kind of craft... it looks nice and is super easy to make! It's one of the few things I saw demoed during the week and went home and made it! Mine is starting to look a little worse for wear but it has been hanging on my wall for 14 years!



Save for the pieces where white is showing...it looks like stone. Here's what you need:

• Water Putty - from Lowe's or Amazon 
• Scraps of 1/2 styrofoam
• 16 or 18 g wire
• Scraps of felt same size as Styrofoam
• Putty knife
• Soap or candle mold...something decorative and small
• White or Styrofoam glue
• Thinned brown paint or brown ink
• Paint brush
• Paper towels
• Wire cutters
• Round nose pliers

Steps

1. Mix some water putty as per directions on box. Pour into the candle / soap mold and allow to harden. When dry, remove from the mold.
2. Cut your Stryofoam into desired shape. I used a rectangle and two squares. 
3. Cut your felt to match your foam shapes. Set aside. 
4. With putty knife, spread water putty onto the sides and front of your foam shapes. Messy looks more rugged, like a real piece of stone. 
5. Spread a little putty onto one of the shapes from the mold and press into the front of the foam piece. I used three leaves on my rectangle and only one on the squares. 
6. Let everything dry. 
7. If using acrylic or house paint...thin it down with water. Or use brown stamping ink. Brush on and rub off with paper towels to age the putty. Think about shadows and light... where would the relief piece naturally be darker??
8. Glue the felt over the back. 
9. Cut a small piece of wire and bend it into a wide V from the middle. Grab one end of the wire about 1/4" from the end and bend it back up toward the middle bend but away from the overall wire piece. (See illustration below.) Repeat on other end. 
10. Insert wire through the felt and into the foam to hang the piece from 

This shows shows the bends in the wire from the front and the side. The little end is inserted into the foam and big bend serves as a hanger.

The beauty of a piece like this is that it looks much heavier than it is yet it can be hung from a sheet rock wall with something as tiny as a brad nail.

Bit Tids February 2014

I've been bogged down with taxes and dealing with new job paperwork. Not too much blog worthy going on so, here's the latest Bit Tids from the Creekhiker.

Somebody's Got a Birthday Coming: 
Yep, Miss Mabel Lou, Queen Bitch of Everything will be 12 on Sunday. I'm dumbfounded. I've never been so lucky to have a super senior dog.  While there are signs that she's not in the best of health...her newest nickname is "Lumpy Lou" - I'm so blessed for every day we get together.  Daily, she is joyful, happy to see friends and energetic at several intervals. And always a drama queen! I'm trying not to see her failings and reminding myself that we're in the Bonus Round!

"I get such a headache when Mom works on the 'puter for too long! Doesn't she know it's time to creek??"

Times - They Are A Changin'

I got the new commercial production guide in the mail yesterday. This contains lists of every conceivable thing one might need to rent on the down and dirty fly of making a television commercial in Los Angeles. Last year's book is on the left; 2014 edition on the right.

I was immediately struck by the size difference. The new one is between 1/4 and 1/3 the size of last years. All sorts of things ran through my head about the state of production in Los Angeles. My mother takes great pride in telling me about all the productions going on near her house in Baton Rouge. But when I opened the new book, I was struck by the much thinner paper. That thing will never survive being tossed across a motorhome as many of my old books did.

The publisher offered up the explanation that "non-crucial" items such as Ice and Bus Rentals have been moved to the free website and taken out of the book.

Well, he's obviously never had to ice down a sidewalk that was melting crew members shoes on the fly or suddenly rent a bus when a company move became overly complicated. There's something about having all those contacts at my fingertips that was very comforting to me in production. I will miss the old, sturdy book chock-full of everything for sure.

My old 4+ pound book is on it's way to a film professor friend. I mail him my old books every year but I may be too embarrassed to bother next year.


Ding Dong! The, uh, nevermind................ She's Dead!

My father's wife died this week. I can't tell you the mix of emotions this brought up in me.

For those of you that have forgotten, I'm a love child. The result of an 18 year affair that I interrupted in year seven.  My father spent many nights and weekends with my mother and I and never once denied us or shunned us in the presence of anyone. I spent many nights with him in the home he shared with his wife and nosy child that I was... left certain of the separate lives they led.

And based on the account of many in the family - aunts, uncles, cousins - the marriage was never really a happy one, aside from the infidelity on both their parts. All of my father's siblings were told that the family business which supported them all would be dissolved if any of them were to divorce. My youngest uncle took pills and drank heavily when his wife threatened divorce, ending his life and saving the family business. Talk about pressure! My father grieved deeply over his brother until his own sudden death in 1975.

While my heart aches at the loss I know my siblings (the ones who deny my existence) must feel, I feel an odd relief that my own mother outlived her. While this woman never missed an opportunity to lash out at me or my mother since my father passed away, I have always behaved like the nice Southern Belle I was raised to be around her.

But now that she's gone, I feel invaded, slapped in the face, knowing that she is to be buried by my father and not by her first cousin she married after Daddy passed. That was my place to go and talk to him and I just hate knowing she might be listening.


SPELL IT!

When I discovered the above via Facebook at 8 pm... the only person I wanted was my mom. I hesitated, knowing it was just after 10 and she would have been asleep for hours by then. That lasted for about 10 seconds.

My mother is "purt near deaf" and is too cheap frugal to deal with hearing aids. We have hilarious conversations of misunderstanding several times a week, especially when she answers one of the ancient phones she owns and not one of the phones for the hard of hearing I have given her.

It went like this:

CH: Mother! Guess who died?
Mom: JEFF SMITH DIED???  (Jeff is her nephew she helped raise... the closest thing to a son my mother has! She was starting to cry!!!)

CH: NO MOM! GUESS who died?
Mom: JEFF??? NOOOO!

CH: NO, MOM!! I'm saying the word GUESS
Mom: SPELL IT!
CH: G - U - E - S - S
Mom: JEFF ... AND WHAT'S THE LAST NAME???

I realized that G became J and ESS sounded like EFF... My 90 year old mom was really upset now...

CH: NO MOM... LET'S START OVER! _____________________ IS DEAD!

My mom was quite relieved it was not her beloved nephew that had died.

Vibrant December / Pink Christmas

Southern California blows my mind in December. It's a shame that I've lived here since 1987 and have only managed to spend a handful of Decembers in my transplanted home state.

Since we start to get a bit more rain, the clouds make for spectacular sunsets.

And the trees! December seems to be our "fall color" month and the trees seem to decorate themselves. I think it's one of the reasons I'm so unenthusiastic about decorating a Christmas tree... I would rather be outside, taking it all in.

Even a trip to the grocery store reveals trees in vibrant orange that go unnoticed the rest of the year:

 

These mulberry branches are so thick that Mabel and I hid out under them when we were caught in a sudden summer rain. We only left when we realized the stream was getting too wide to leap over. But in December, they are so bare, they wouldn't protect us from a sprinkle:

But they don't strip before putting on a show:

The crisp cool air makes the moon feel magical coming over the mountains:

It feels lovely to be hiking the North / South trail in the creek with the moon coming up on one side and sun setting on the other:

 Mabel is fascinated by the leaves, especially those floating on the water:

 

I love this shot because you cannot tell where land ends and the creek begins!

I thought I would tack a personal bit on about the holiday as my mother's Facebook minions that share everything little thing I post with her, will have gotten bored by now if they bothered to click over.

Mom somehow convinced herself that I was going Louisiana for Christmas. This freaked several in the family out! I think she truly didn't believe that I would leave her all alone the first Christmas after my sister died, even though I had begged her to come here for months. We had a very sad phone call on Christmas Eve when I had her check her caller and i.d. and "do the math" to realize... I simply couldn't make it to Baton Rouge for Christmas.

In the end, I think it's good for her to be alone with her grief a maybe start to realize her only family is in California.

Me??? I found myself having a pink Christmas! I eschewed my usual olive or forest greens with the occasional pop of red for...PINK. I think it was so I could wear this:

It was my sister's and I found myself wearing it everywhere. It made me feel like I was taking her out to see the sights of Christmas and to every party I attended. I think it might be my new Christmas color!

Thoughts on the Trip

The three of us are Home! Mabel Lou, Baby and I made it home. We are thrilled and happy despite a rude little flight attendant that didn't like big dogs and the fact that our flight was originally headed to San Francisco and we had some unhappy co-passengers!

This is Mabel Lou's first creek hike last night. I was pointing the camera at her and asked, "Mabel, are you HAPPY?" and this is what I got:

It was such a lovely night with friends... until Hank and Sue took off and met a skunk! I spent the evening taking supplies to their Mom. Poor babies!

+++++++++++

I haven't spent much time in Louisiana in the summer in such a long time and I was struck by so many contrasts between my two homes...


Ripoff Report:
It's odd to me what items are expensive in one place vs. the other. In Louisiana, milk and produce are much more expensive... and there's a dairy just outside Baton Rouge. But milk is about a $1.25 more in most stores! And produce prices are terribly high there...is it because more people garden and there is less demand?

I had to buy some of these for a friend in CA recently.

They were a buck a piece! Really??? What mom would buy pre-made frozen sandwiches for a buck each! That tag is from Louisiana and that price would make them .598 cents each! Why such a big price difference???

Gasoline is nearly a buck more a gallon here. Our government claims it's the "expensive" detergents required to meet California summer emissions...  Excuse me while I laugh.

I know housing is so pricey here but many other things are the same or even less...

DUCK Goose!

The first day I visited my Mom at rehab, I was over the moon to see this goose family a few feet from my car:

I'm kinda terrified of geese...I was attacked by them once on a film location!  But the bird babies got me. By the time Mom left, one of the babies was MIA. One evening as I was driving home, I stopped my car in the middle of the street because the family was passing. I was honked at and given the middle finger salute and not one vehicle stopped for the family! OK, we're talking a grand total of three cars on this remote street but still!

Cut to my trip to the thrift store this morning: I see a local peacock family crossing my street. I stopped. Mom looked beat to bits...like a coyote got a hold of her. I was most surprised to see a big male helping her tend the two chicks.

And the three other cars that I encountered??? They all stopped and watched! There's something to be said for us nutty Californians!

God is Everywhere
Funny but that sort of sums up my religious philosophy but, in the case of the South, I mean it literally! It was to the point where it was starting to offend me and I'm a very spiritual person who also believes in leaving others to make their own dang minds up. If you ask me, I'll tell you what I believe and why but I don't go around trying to lead a flock anywhere. Heck, there as days I feel I've done a good job and if me and dog are still alive at the end of it!

But there are NUMEROUS religious television channels on 24/7! My personal favorite was a charlatan who insisted God would bless me if I only sowed a "thousand dollar favor" to plant a "triple favor seed" with the Lord....(That's ONLY 84 dollar a month!)  By "the Lord" he meant his ministry.   When I think of some of the dim witted, but kind-hearted folks I know that would fall for this crap, it gives me greater understanding of the old Southern phrase "he needed killin!" I really don't understand how the FCC can allow such cons on the air!

And then with the 4th of July even the local yokel news anchors were throwing around "God Bless America and God Bless YOU" at the end of their commercials advertising their fireworks spectacular. I only ate out in a restaurant a total of three times but one of them was selling little crosses and stitched pillows reminding me that Jesus is Lord. If you want to find the Lord, I'm certain He's in the South. Or you could at least find a replica to purchase!

But all of this made me wonder... WHY go to church? You can preached at endlessly, tithe and order religious ephemera all from the comfort of your air conditioned home!

Patience for Patients

Taking care of my strong and willful mom was an eye opening experience. So many issues of my own inadequacy from the constant criticism are way too near the surface. I couldn't help but think of taking care of my sister just six months before.

No matter what I did for my sis, there was that kind, sweet little voice ALWAYS... "Thank youuuu! Thank YOU!" for everything. She knew she was hard to please but she always said it. I remember trying to move her. I couldn't lift her but I knew she could hold onto my neck. I would tell her we were dancing. "Take a step right, take a step back." She listened and I could maneuver her where I needed her to go, cheek to cheek. She would kiss me and thank me.

I would change her diapers and she would look up at me and apologize over and over. My response was always the same, "Hey, you changed mine! Now it's my turn!"

And while it's natural for my mother to long for her lost child gazing through the perfection colored glasses of loss, I wish, just once, I could feel like the good daughter I know I am. One who is not always wrong in everything she does.

Waiting

Mabel Lou here. I'm waiting for Bailey to get in Granny's car. Mom had the suitcases out! And I only have ONE toothbrush treat left... Hmmmm

Mississippi Sunset

These were taken from the deck of the Belle of Baton Rouge Casino while I was waiting (and waiting and waiting) for Mom

Mom Got Her Hair Did!

After MONTHS of begging, I FINALLY got Mom to color her hair back dark! I LOVE it!! I feel like I have my mommy back!

She had let her hair go gray because my sister asked her to. Patsy was so sick and her vanities made her deplore that strangers thought she and Mom were sisters and often, they thought Patsy was older! I think this the only awful thing my sister has ever done to my mother. But Mom did it willingly and lovingly.

And for some reason she feared coloring it. She kept having nightmares that it came our red...something this red-head didn't understand. What's wrong with red? Red is HOT! But for me it was a safety issue. Mom leads a higher risk lifestyle than I do. From her choice of neighborhood - the neighbor kid's bike was stolen while we were sitting on the front porch this week, calling the cops and yelling at the perp as it went down - to late nights in the casino. And I felt her hair made her a target. When her hair is dark, it's not so obvious just how old she is.

This is a shade or so lighter than she used to wear it and she's already wishing she had taken the plunge back to her old color. I'm just so happy to have her looking like her healthy self.

Speaking of which, I keep catching her with no walker! She swept the kitchen yesterday and hoed the garden and picked a dozen cucumbers today!

Punished

Mabel Lou here. My mom and I must have done something really bad because we've been sent to hell -  otherwise known as Louisiana. Mom keeps saying were going home but the suitcases never get packed. It is so hot here, I've taken to shade baking. Note that there is only a tiny patch of sun on my body in this photo.

It's hot in the morning and hot in the middle of the night. Thursday night we were coming home from Bailey's and I saw some swamp critter breaking into my foodables!! I chased him but I lost my breath and couldn't find it again for hours! Mom said she felt like she was sleeping in a vibrating bed cause I was breathing so hard!

There's nothing to do here but sleep and try to keep my cousin Bailey in line. I try to supervise Mom when she waters Granny's garden and make sure my Granny does her walkies but that's about all the outside I can take. We did go to the park again and Mom thought I might take a dip in the shallow end of that thing she's calls a pond but it's too hot and muddy for my taste. I wouldn't even drink from it even though I was so hot! And we got word from our hiking buddies that my creek has dried up back home! Sheesh! Can't a pup get a break??

Keep me and my mom in your good thoughts and prayers...I hope I get to see my house again soon!

Supervising Granny's Walk

Mabel Lou here. Granny got a new hip less than three weeks ago. Bailey and I make sure she gets her exercise done!

Do it again Granny!

+++++++++++++++
CreekHiker here... do I dare tell you that Mabel and I caught Granny DANCING in her kitchen without her walker yesterday????  

Louisiana Summer

I have avoided Louisiana in the summer for about a decade. Last summer does not count as my sister was so sick... It's all a blur.  While it is hot enough that I long to be in my mother's dark cave of a house, it is nice to see some of mother's plants in bloom.

I Told Her to Go Potty

Mabel Lou is not doing well with the Louisiana heat. I collapsed into bed at 8 on Monday night and by 1:30 Mabel wanted outside. I stumbled out with her hoping we could actually enjoy the cool night air. No such luck. It was too hot to breathe!

I do make her go out and sun bake. I show her squirrels to chase, toss her ball and try to force outside activities on her. She begs to go inside within minutes. So I brush her...she's blowing coat something fierce!

All potty trips are lightning quick with her pushing the back door open in seconds. But then it comes time for me to go visit Mom in rehab.

I explained to Mabel that Granny has a boo boo and is in the hospital. I explain that I'm running late and she needs to go potty quick quick. And what she did next convinced me she knew I was leaving:

Not once has she done this in the back yard!

I Miss My Puppeh!

Mother's surgery went well but we had a rough night last night. Mom had so much gas on her tummy from anesthesia, we thought she was having a heart attack! At 1 a.m., her room was filled with over a dozen nurses and doctors, who all got a good (albeit expensive) laugh when we realized Mom's 90 year old heart is just fine. All she really needed was a good toot!  She had several more episodes  of severe pain before getting any relief! And neither of us has slept... SO tired!

And I miss my girl. She has adapted well to staying with her cousin Bailey. She's sleeping a lot... something she usually does for the first three days of not seeing me.  I could so use a good Mabel Lou snuggle!

"Uh Granny??? Save ME some!!!"

I'm hoping Mom gets to move to a rehab facility tomorrow and I will get to see my girl! Either way, I need fresh clothes! 

"That's more like it!"

Good Thoughts for Mom

Today is surgery day. We will be at the hospital well before the sun for Mom's 7 a.m. surgery. (Mabel Lou will hopefully be snoozing and playing nicely with her cousin Bailey.)

If you have a moment today, think of my mom. Please keep her, and us, in your good thoughts and prayers! It is much appreciated!

Not Normal by Any Stretch...

I had hoped I could be posting more here by June. As always, make plans and the Universe laughs.

Mom needs a hip replacement. Yes, my 90-year-old mother...who still cuts her 3/4 acre yard with a push mower... is tired of cutting her grass in bone on bone pain! Pistol that she is, she's getting herself a new hip! The fact that she's so active is what convinced her doc to do it.

 We miss this already (Mabel with Rottrover's Otto)

So Mabel and I are to be nurse maids in Louisiana for a whopping five weeks. I haven't spent that much time down South cumulatively in decades! And certainly not in the summer! I'm a wimp and Mom hates the A/C!

And, that's not all. My wonderful brother-in-law, who spent so much time taking care of my sister the last year and a half of her life, found out he's living with not one but TWO hernias! He will most likely have surgery while we're home.

And... as if that's not enough...I just found out I have cellulitis (the connective tissue kind; not the inflamed skin kind)  in my feet making standing and walking terribly painful again!

To make it even worse... I will have limited internet connection.... I promise, I'll visit your blogs as often as I can...

It's gonna be an interesting summer....

May Photos - My Mother

 It's funny - the photos we like of ourselves and the photos others like of us. This is my mother's favorite photo of herself. It was taken in the fifties at a Mardi Gras Ball where her older brother was the king. She has a giant version of this on her mantel and had smaller prints made for my sister and I about 20 years ago.

This would be her second favorite.This was actually a black and white photo of her from the forties. As a gift for her, I had it colorized but the artist got a detail wrong. That dress was a V-neck. But I was impressed at the accuracy of the other details.

Maybe these are not my favorites because I wasn't around then. This is not the mother I know. This next one is my favorite:

It was taken in the early eighties in our home in McComb, MS. Mother was doing dishes... as always. 

And this was was taken in my kitchen in 2010, after she allowed my sister to talk her into going gray. (I've nearly talked her out of that and she's almost ready to be brunette again!) She's holding Twinkie's brother Predrito and I simply love the smile on her face.

Oh! How Things Change

This recent find of baby Mabel photos amaze and amuse me.  Although it looks like she's hanging her head in shame...she's really just trying to stay awake! And not doing a very good job of it for a 8 and 1/2 month old pup!

This  next one was taken in the back yard about the same time... I think that bone is bigger than she is!

What amazes me about both photos is...how clean and nice everything looks! My grass is green. (I had money for the water bill.) The yard is trimmed. (My arms didn't ache for three weeks after mowing the grass.) The fences looked nice. (Mabel hadn't discovered chewing through them to get at critters!) The pool is clean. (I didn't have a duck. My back didn't kill me when I vacuumed it) .

The first photo shows that my carpets and kitchen floor are clean. ( I didn't own two businesses or teach, which lead me to create piles of stuff. I know where things are but if you walked in, you might think the place had been ransacked!) And my puppy still had many years ahead of her (although I was deep in HATE with her at this point in her life! Honestly, I've never disliked any dog more in my life.) And now, I know she is a senior and she too will leave me all too soon.

Sigh.... Looking at all of what was once my dream house makes me feel like such a loser!

I know I have to make some changes and I AM trying. I gave away about ten pounds of paints last week (two drawers in the craft studio!) I am trying on five or six pieces of clothing every day and what doesn't look good has GOT to go! I've been scanning photos that are fading in frames. The frames are in a pile for a charity (two shelves in the family room cleaned!).

Part of it is seeing how "stuff" is paralyzing my 90 year old mother. She doesn't want to commit to moving because "what will I do with my stuff?" She cannot see she does not need her stuff and won't need it ever again. She asks me daily what to do with it... my answer is "stop bringing more stuff home from the casino for starters!" I don't think it occurs to her that if she passed away tomorrow, it would be me, alone, having to get rid of it all...

And as for my four bedroom house and massive studio space full of stuff... I don't want it holding me down any more. I'm selling what I can on ebay. I realize even my inventory needs for the shop are changing...no one buys wood mounted stamps any more... so I've been selling grab bags of them, hoping to reclaim my shelf space for inventory that will sell in my classes.

It's a slow and tortuous process...letting go. But I have to. I have to!

Mabel Working Granny

For the record, my dogs are not allowed to behave this way... except with their Granny. While I only have one dog at a time, all of my girls seem to innately know that their grandmother is completely open to manipulation! This is how Mabel works her Granny to get "20 bites" of delicious Manda Sausage. Sorry it's vertical...still getting used to my phone. And I cut the footage when I thought Mabel was walking away, however, her Granny asked her "Who do you love??" and Mabel rushed back in for hugs and kisses!